him - jughead jones
read on ao3 here
↳ a / n - inspired by a prompt that i found on pinterest that was based around the idea of a trauma reveal. this is like the most angsty fic i’ve written so enjoy ajshwjsj
↳ content warnings - violence, implied violence, depictions of torture, swearing, angst, also i’m terrible at endings rip
↳ 4.6k word count
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“we got them.”
the text from jughead had caused a relieved sigh to pass her lips as she started walking towards the whyte wyrm, where the gang were. there had been someone riling up the serpents for a while; trashing their bikes, leaving threatening messages, calling the cops on them, etcetera etcetera. it had been happening for a good few weeks to a month at that point, and the serpents had all been losing hope in finding whoever it was. most if not all of the serpents thought it was an old member of the ghoulies; it wouldn’t make too much sense if it was someone else.
y/n allowed herself to breath out a relieved sigh as she opened the doors to the whyte wyrm and stepped inside. now that they had caught this guy, hopefully everything would stop. the bar was empty when she had stepped inside, and she assumed that the bar had been cleared out to keep a hold of and question the asshole. she had noticed outside that fp’s bike was nowhere to be seen, and realised that he didn’t know about what was going on. if he did, there was no way that he would have let jughead do it alone.
when she had stepped inside she could hear shouting around the back, and hugged her jacket tighter to herself as she went through the doors at the back to get to the storage room, where she realised they were holding him. she didn’t particularly like seeing her boyfriend in interrogation mode, as he barely ever shouted when she was with him, but since being in the serpents she had seen that side of him more and more. jughead didn’t scare her, shouting made her nervous, no matter who it was from.
toni was stood by the door when she got to the storage room, and she gave her friend a small smile as she approached.
“were they a ghoulie?” she asked, and toni shrugged.
“i don’t know, jughead said he thinks he recognised him but he’s not certain.” the pink-haired girl shrugged with a sigh. having someone constantly harassing the serpents had taken its toll on everyone, and y/n could see how tired they were. she hoped it all was about to end.
y/n nodded and gave toni a quick hug before she pulled the door open and stepped inside, bracing herself for whatever was about to happen. all of the boxes in the room had been shoved to one wall to make room for the chair that sat underneath the light. from where jughead was stood she couldn’t quite see the guy’s face, though she took note of the duct tape that had him bound to the chair, and was relieved that he didn’t have a chance to get violent. if he really was a ghoulie, it was a precaution that had to be taken; they were pretty well known for their violence. sweet pea leaned against the left wall and fangs was stood beside the door, and she gave the boys a small smile as she shut the door behind her again.
“who’s this?” the strained voice from the middle of the room sounded strangely familiar, but she didn’t have time to focus on it too much as a groan filled the room when jughead kicked his leg. hard.
“shut your mouth, “ he warned, and when she glanced up at him she could see his blade glinting underneath the light. “you’d better start answering our questions.”
jughead started pacing the room then, and once he was out of the way y/n could see who was in the chair. and her stomach twisted almost painfully when she met his eyes. he was staring back at her as jughead started talking again, and when she saw the sick twisted hint of a smile at the corner of his lips she wanted to throw up.
she didn’t know his name, or where he was from, or anything about him at all. all she did know was that for just over a week, she had been held at his mercy as a favour to penny peabody.
it had been just before riot night, when jughead and penny were practically at war. jughead had explained to her after everything that penny knew she was his weakness, and used it against him. although she had never seen penny when she had been held captive, she had seen his ghoulies jacket whenever he came to see her. she didn’t even know where she was being held; in an abandoned building somewhere, so that nobody would accidentally stumble across her. for eight days she had been handcuffed to an old pipe in the freezing cold room, and subjected to the worst amounts of pain she had ever experienced. when the serpents had finally found her, she spent the week after in hospital. and then fangs was shot, and then jughead was beaten within an inch of his life, and then the harassment of the gang started back up again. after everything that had happened, it had been kind of easy to move on from her own torture, as she had countless amounts of distractions to keep her from thinking of it. though stood there in front of him, with his eyes locked on her like they did when he was about to hurt her, it all came back with a painful stab in her stomach.
she had started shaking when his smile grew into a grin, and for a moment she was scared that he would hurt her again. her vision had grown blurry with unshed tears, and she barely noticed the next time jughead had yelled at the guy.
“hows it going, y/n?”
she could see all three boys tense up when the guy spoke, and a noise that resembled a strangled whimper made it out of the back of her throat. when they had saved her, she mentioned the ghoulies jacket and briefly explained that she was hurt, but she didn’t let on to the extent of it all.
and now they were about to know everything.
she could feel their eyes all on her as the trembling grew worse and the tears started slipping down her cheeks, but she couldn’t pull her gaze away from him.
“excuse me?” jughead was glancing between them, but she couldn’t bring herself to meet her boyfriend’s eyes.
“long time no see-” the man cut himself off with a grunt when jughead punched him in the stomach, and she could hear him wheeze as he dragged a breath back in. she was aware of the feeling of being winded, and could almost hear her own wheeze inhales of breath from when he had kicked her into a ball against the pipe.
fangs was at her side and she knew that he was talking to her, but she couldn’t understand what he was saying. it felt like her head was underwater, and the only clear thing she could hear was him.
“you’re jughead, right?” he wheezed as he looked up at her boyfriend, and her knees almost buckled when she realised what was coming. “she begged for you.”
sweet pea had pushed himself off of the wall at that point, and she watched as his blade practically touched the guy’s face. “how the fuck do you know her?”
“she must really love you, y’know,” he was still talking to jughead, and she choked back a sob as her chest heaved. “she didn’t stop begging for you, not even when i slashed her own knife across her throat.”
her hand had unconsciously lifted to rest over her neck, where a small though noticeable scar was. he had taken her knife off of her when she had tried to defend herself, and in some sick twisted metaphor he used it on her to hurt her. when she still had a fight in her, he’d cut her neck with the blade; not enough to kill her by any means, it was only a little sting. it was to serve her a reminder that he had the power to kill her if he wanted to.
her stomach dropped the next time she felt jughead’s eyes on her, because from that statement alone they all would know exactly who he was. and now they would have to know everything that happened.
“what did you just say?” jughead spoke quietly, which in a situation like that was worse than him yelling. he always got quiet before he completely lost his shit.
“i’m saying,” the guy glared up at jughead, before he glanced back at y/n, who could barely keep herself stood up. “that i’ve probably made your girlfriend scream more than you-”
jughead punched him again, and she had started shaking so much that fangs had grown concerned enough to try to guide her out of the room, though her feet had rooted to the floor and she was completely stiffened in place. she wanted nothing more than to have run home and hidden away from everyone, but she physically couldn’t move.
“you wanna know what i did to her?” he spat blood towards jughead’s shoes, and her bottom lip quivered as he looked back at her once more. “i-”
“please don’t.”
her voice was quiet, and if she was in a normal atmosphere she probably wouldn’t have even been heard. but as soon as she had spoken the room was so silent she probably could have heard a pin drop. all of them were looking at her, and fangs had started trying to guide her out of the room again, but she still couldn’t move. the guy, who still had his eyes locked on hers, leaned forwards in his seat, and at the movement it was almost natural for her to flinch back into fangs with a stumble, and he had to hold her upright when her knees had finally given out.
he had grinned at that, and even when sweet pea had yanked him back in his seat by his hair he was still grinning. “still scared? good girl-” sweet pea had placed his knife to his throat at that, and she still couldn’t meet jughead’s eyes when he had looked over at her.
“get her out of here.” jughead’s voice was thick as he had spoken, and fangs had to all but carry her towards the door. he had wrenched the door open with one hand, and just as toni had appeared with panicked questions as she helped fangs pull her out of the door, she could hear him saying to “check her leg for my work” before he grunted again with the force of another blow.
the door had shut behind them with a loud bang, and y/n sucked in a huge breath through the sobs she was still holding back. she could hear toni ask what had happened, but everything sounded muffled through the ringing in her ears. fangs was still gently holding onto her arm, but as the memories from what had happened started filling her mind and she had a vivid image of his hand on her arm instead, she flinched away so harshly from fangs that she ended up stumbling backwards into the wall.
“shit, y/n.” fangs had stepped forwards to help stable her but she flinched again, and he rooted himself to the spot.
“i need-” her voice cracked and her chest heaved again with the will to cry. “i need to go- i need to go home.”
“okay, i’ll drive you-”
“no,” she shook her head, and clamped her hand over her mouth for a moment when the nausea came flying back with the memories. only once it had passed she removed her hand to speak again. “no, i need to walk- i can’t-” her breathing had grown heavy and as she stepped backwards again she almost fell over. toni stepped towards her to help but she stepped back again, right into a chair, and had just about managed to stabilize herself before she slipped. “i’m fine.”
she could hear fangs and toni calling for her as she walked towards the exit of the bar, and her breathing only got heavier once she had pushed the doors open and got outside. the air was cold and it didn’t do anything to help what she was feeling. she had gotten over it all; the distractions provided recently helped her move on quickly, and she barely had any time to think about what had happened to her. but seeing him again just brought it all back, and it felt like the night she had been saved all over again.
fangs and toni were still calling for her, and she sped up when she could hear their footsteps following behind her, though she hadn’t been paying attention to her surroundings and ended up walking right into somebody. she flinched and almost stumbled backwards on her own feet, though hands on her forearms kept her upright and she looked up with a slightly relieved feeling to see that it was fp stood in front of her.
her parents went away a lot for their work, and they were away for the time that she was recovering from what had happened to her, so once she had been discharged from hospital jughead and fp had let her stay at the trailer. she had always gotten on well with fp, though in the time that she was living with them, they had gotten close, and fp was pretty much a second father figure to her. sometimes she went over to the trailer when jughead wasn’t there, and she’d spend some time with fp while she waited for him. so she trusted him, as much as she trusted the rest of the serpents. so she didn’t pull away from the older serpent as he held her upright, though she did shrink a little under his gaze as she was still trying not to cry.
“y/n?” he asked, and she could see a concerned frown appear on his face. jughead had the exact same expression when he was worried, and the thought of him in there listening to what had happened to her caused a strangled sob to escape out of her throat. fp didn’t hesitate to pull her into a hug then, and as soon as he’d held her close she gripped onto his jacket and completely broke down. she could feel his palm as it gently moved over her back, and she gripped onto him even tighter. if he minded, he didn’t say anything.
she could hear him conversing with fangs and toni, a lot of “what happened” and “is she okay?”, but for the most part she tried to block out the conversation. she didn’t want to hear their explanation, or hear fp’s reaction to it all. she didn’t hear most of it, but she knew when he had found out what happened because she could feel his grip on her grow tighter, more protective. it reminded her of jughead again and she just sobbed harder.
she didn’t know when their conversation had ended, but soon enough she could feel fp move and his arm had moved around her back, tucking her into his side as he lead her across the parking lot. he was talking to her but she couldn’t quite hear him as she continued crying, so she just stumbled along beside him until they had reached his truck. she was glad he didn’t have his bike instead. y/n watched as fp unlocked the door before he helped her into the passenger seat, and she was still crying when he gently placed his hand on her shoulder to get her to look at him.
“i’m just going inside for a few minutes then i’ll come out and drive you home, okay?”
she shook her head, and just ended up having to clamp her hand over her mouth because she couldn’t stop crying enough to form the words that she wanted to say.
“what?” fp frowned, and she felt his grip gently on her shoulder. “are your parents home?” she shook her head and he nodded. “okay, you can stay at the trailer, alright? you have things there, don’t you?” she nodded and she watched as he forced a smile. “alright, i’ll only be a few minutes.” he pressed a kiss to her forehead (that made her cry harder at the gentle action) before he stood up and gently shut the cab door behind him.
she watched him walk back towards the bar - meeting toni and fangs halfway - before they all walked back into the bar. she curled her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around herself, sobbing so hard that her chest hurt and she couldn’t quite catch her breath. now fp would go in and hear exactly what happened too, and they would all know in detail what she had been trying so hard to forget. now she would never get away from it.
-
true to his word, fp was only in the bar for a maximum of five minutes, and afterwards he drove her to the trailer. she hadn’t asked about what jughead was doing (he had simply told her he would be home soon), she hadn’t asked about her friends, and she most definitely hadn’t asked about him. fp kept glancing at her during the drive there, and she knew he was worried, but he had simply turned the radio on and drove in silence, which she was thankful for. she was still crying when he had gotten into the truck, and she wouldn’t have been able to stop for long enough to have a conversation.
he had helped her inside and as she changed into some of jughead’s clothes, he made her a mug of hot chocolate that he had left on jughead’s bedside table for her. thankfully, he had left her alone after that, and somewhere in between sipping the warm drink and getting comfortable underneath the covers of jughead’s bed, she had calmed down enough to stop crying. her eyes were sore and her face was flushed, and she hadn’t stopped shaking since she had first seen him, but it was a start.
around half an hour after she had gotten to the trailer, she could hear the rumble of a motorcycle outside, and with a sick feeling when she could hear the front door open she realised jughead was home. the volume of the tv out in the living room increased to mask the noise of the conversation happening, and y/n couldn’t be more thankful to fp for how he had helped her that night.
her shaking had increased whilst jughead and fp spoke in the living room, so much so that she had to put the mug down in fear of spilling any drink on jughead’s covers. would jughead want to talk to her about what happened? she didn’t think she would physically be able to say anything without breaking down again if she was honest. she just wanted to fall asleep with him holding her, and forget that anything had ever happened.
there was a gentle knock at the door before it opened, and she frowned underneath jughead’s gaze once he had stepped into the room. it had been easier the night that she was rescued; she was just so thankful that they had found her that she didn’t care that he was seeing her in such a fragile state, she just was happy to have him hold her again. but it felt different, because he had to listen in detail to what had happened. she didn’t even want to know what his reaction had been once she had left. had he stood in horrified silence and listened to the recount of her torture, or had he gotten physical? she took a glance at his knuckles as he shut the door, and once she saw the red and bruised skin there she had her answer.
jughead sighed as he walked over to the bed, and she watched with teary eyes as he slipped off his jacket and took off his hat. “y/n-”
as soon as his hand had moved to rest on her arm comfortingly she started crying again. she felt pathetic; she’s only just stopped crying for fuck sake. jughead had immediately sat down beside her once she started crying and pulled her into his embrace. she gripped onto his shirt tightly as she cried, and pressed her face into his shoulder as he held her.
“it’s okay, love, he won’t hurt you anymore.”
she wanted to tell him that she wasn’t crying because of that, and it was because everyone now knew everything that she had tried so hard to forget, but she couldn’t stop crying, so she just shook her head as she gripped onto him tighter.
jughead sighed, and she could feel his lips against the top of her head. “i’m so sorry he was there, i shouldn’t have text you. he-”
“i- i don’t want to- to know.” her chest heaved as she spoke and jughead just nodded as he held her closer.
“okay,” he whispered and sighed. “okay, sweetheart.”
she continued to cry for the next ten minutes or so, and jughead didn’t let her go for the whole time. he had constantly kept his hand rubbing her back, and littered kisses along the top of her head as he whispered soft promises of his love for her. it did help, no matter how little, and even once she had calmed down a little she refused to let go of him.
“i’m-” her breath hitched, as she still wasn’t completely calm, but jughead just waited patiently for her to finish. “i’m sorry.”
“why are you apologising?” he whispered, and when he had kissed the top of her head she almost burst into tears again.
“i didn’t want you to know what he-” her stomach lurched, and she had to swallow the bile that rose in her throat. “-what happened, and you had to- you had to hear-” her voice had broken as the tears slipped down her cheeks again, and she could hear jughead mumbling apologies into her hair as he held her closer.
“shh, love,” he whispered, and y/n gripped onto him tighter as he pulled her into his lap so that he could hold her to his chest. “you’re working yourself up too much, you’re gonna make yourself sick,” she could feel the vibrations of his voice through his chest, and gripped onto his shirt in a fist as her chest heaved again. “it doesn’t matter that i had to-”
“yes it does!” she sobbed, and she forcefully dragged in another breath as he gripped onto her. “i didn’t want you to- now everyone knows!”
“y/n you need to calm down,” she could tell he was concerned through the tone of his voice, and how his grip on her subtly tightened. “take in a deep breath for me, love.”
y/n tried, and failed when she just continued crying, and by the time he had lifted his hands to her cheeks so that he could tilt her head up to look at him her chest was burning and her eyes were sore again. he kept one of his hands on her cheek to keep her looking at him, and she could feel his other one gently lift her hand to rest on his chest. “breathe with me, okay?”
she nodded as she flattened her palm against his chest, and her hand still shook when he had flattened his own over hers. she could feel his heartbeat drumming through his shirt and against her hand, and tried to focus on the rise and fall of his chest as she closed her eyes. it took her a few tries and a few whispered encouragements from jughead, but after a few minutes she had managed to match her breathing to his, and effectively helped her calm down.
“how’d you-” she hiccuped, and it hurt her already sore chest. “-how’d you know how to do that?”
he dropped his hand from hers and cradled her to his chest again as he leaned back against the headboard, and she closed her eyes as he held her. “when my parents used to argue and it got really bad, jellybean got panic attacks,” y/n frowned at the thought of his little sister in such a state, and let her hand gently rub his side. “i’d take her outside or into my room and it helped calm her down.”
y/n nodded against his shoulder, and sighed softly when his lips pressed another gentle kiss to her forehead. they were silent for a few moments after that, and it allowed her to calm down further. she still trembled in his arms, though aside from the occasional sniffle she had stopped crying. after everything she just felt exhausted. she just wanted to go to sleep and forget everything.
“y/n?” jughead’s soft voice broke the silence, and she nodded though she didn’t look up at him. “you can say no, but uhm… can i see your leg?”
she stiffened in his arms, and immediately he had rubbed her back and mumbled apologies into her hair. knowing what was on her leg and how it had gotten there hurt, but she knew that jughead would see it eventually anyways, whether she showed him then or not. so she slowly untangled her arm from his waist and with a shaky hand pulled up the edge of the boxers that she was wearing, to reveal the scar on the top of her thigh.
‘K. G’, it read. not only had he cut her neck with her own knife, but a few days later he had used it on her again. she could remember him saying it was so she could “never forget him” as he cut his initials into the top of her thigh, and at just of the sight of the letters embedded into her skin her eyes filled with tears once more. jughead hadn’t said anything for a moment, and when she glanced at his face his expression was unreadable. he sighed as his hand came to rest on her leg, and her bottom lip trembled as he gently ran the pad of his thumb just underneath the scar.
“i’m so sorry,” he was whispering, and she closed her eyes as he pressed his lips to her forehead. “i should have been there to protect you, and i should have found you sooner. i’m so sorry he hurt you,” he was crying too when she looked up at him, and as he leaned in to kiss her their faces were wet, and the kiss tasted salty with tears. “he’ll never hurt you again, nobody will. i promise. i’d die a thousand times over before i ever let something happen to you.”
her lip trembled again and she nodded, unable to form any words as he held her close to himself again. her arms locked behind his back so that she didn’t have to let go of him, and she squeezed her eyes shut as she tried to relax into him. he had started whispering loving things into her hair again, and as he rubbed her back it allowed her to relax somewhat. she had fallen asleep like that; listening to his soft words as her head pounded and her stomach continued to lurch. she wasn’t okay, in fact she was far from it. but with a hopeful thought as she started falling asleep in his arms, she would be.
