a/n: i took the liberty to try and write this one in paragraph form, i hope you don’t mind!! Requests are still open!
There was only one thing in the world with which you were certain. It wasn’t your name, your birthday, your height, your blood type. It wasn’t your own parents, your siblings, your relatives, your own knowledge, or your place in the world. It wasn’t even the certainty that you had two eyes on your face or ten fingers between your hands, or ten toes. It also wasn’t the certainty that you were alive and real in this world.
The one thing with which you were certain was that you and Jun were meant to be. Soulmates. Never to be broken apart. Tangled together by the red string of fate. Not even the sharpest blade could sever the tie that connected the two of you to the ends of the earth.
You knew this very fact from the moment Jun told you that he loved your smile, saying this with a large dorky smile shining from his face as well. It was then you knew he was the one and that your worlds were meant to cross like this, that it was fate the two of you met.
Your heart soared the day Jun asked you to be his lover, taking your hand in his, expressing his desire to be the one at your side. Of course, you accepted and you felt that the world had immediately brightened around you, hand in hand with the one you loved.
Your relationship was far from perfect. You both were well aware of each other’s tendencies, each other’s flaws, but it wasn’t much a problem, as you both had agreed to work through these issues, to be rid of the bad and only move forward with the good.
Jun clung to you. He always wanted to make sure you were okay, that you were never hurt, that you were never sad, never stressed, never worried. But in turn, he took all of those worries and hurt and sadness onto himself, something didn’t want him to do, but nothing you said could prevent him from doing so. It only made you worry for him more. You knew that the stress would eventually overwhelm him, and his ever positive, never ending optimistic smile would eventually be shattered. That was the last thing you wanted to happen to him.
“Jun, one of these days this is going to kill you.”
“It’s okay, Y/N, I’m strong, you know that!! I just want to always see a smile on your face.”
“I always want to see a smile on your face too, Jun...”
At that, he smiled brightly at you, his puppy smile beaming from the sunken hollows of his face, worn from lack of sleep and stress. He squished your cheek and rubbed his hand against it affectionately.
“See? I’m smiling, I’m always smiling, you know that babe.” You smiled at him in return, but you couldn’t ignore the worry lines on his face and the strain behind his eyes.
You noticed that the stress was changing him. He wasn’t as patient as he was before. He was less willing to work through your problems, snapping at you, before immediately feeling guilty, apologizing profusely, then retreating to his room where he said he wouldn’t want to leave for fear of hurting you.
“I’m supposed to be the one preventing you from getting hurt, not the one hurting you.”
“Jun, it’s okay to have fights every now and then but we have to talk about it... Junnie, you’re tired and stressed, please share some of it with me, there’s only so much you can handle alone.”
“No, you go on living a happy life Y/N, that’s what I’m here for.”
But you knew that he was nearing his breaking point, he couldn’t go on for much longer like this.
You were very close to Jun’s friends as well, as they always heard endless tales about you prior to you dating Jun, as Jun would gush about you 24/7. As you and Jun went your separate ways for school that morning, your classes started later, so you had arranged to meet with Jun’s best friend Minghao to express your concerns about Jun.
“Y/N! We don’t talk very often, what’s going on that you needed to speak with me?” Minghao’s face was etched with concern. He knew that your trouble was with Jun, why else would you have invited him out for breakfast to have a chat? He loved his best friend endlessly and loved you just as much for giving Jun such an amazing life.
“It’s Jun... he keeps on taking on all my burdens, refusing to let me handle them on my own or at least sharing his own burdens with me so that I might help him lighten the load. He insists that he’s strong enough to handle all of them and that he can get through it and just wants me to be happy. But Minghao, he’s breaking, it’s becoming way too much for him. I want to make him see that or else he’s just going to self destruct. He’s going to harm himself in some way!”
Tears had begun to roll down your cheeks as you expressed your worries to Jun’s kind best friend. Minghao didn’t like to see you cry. He reached out and gently wiped the tears from your face with a napkin.
“Jun really does love you, but he needs to see that you love him enough to care for him too and that he can’t handle everything by himself. A relationship is about mutual trust and effort...”
“Yeah... do you think you could talk to him for me, Minghao?”
“I could try, but I don’t know how much he’ll listen to me...”
“He’s at the end of his patience nowadays, barely keeping his emotions and temper in check when he speaks to me. Oh, I wish he would just tell me what’s wrong sometimes.”
Minghao took your hand and squeezed it reassuringly.
“I’m sure you can get through to him, Y/N, he loves you a lot.”
In one swift move, someone had grabbed your hand and pulled it clear from Minghao’s. You looked up in surprise to see your own boyfriend standing there, book bag in one hand, your hand in the other. His eyes looked back and forth between you and Minghao furiously, his face a mixture of anger, fear, annoyance, and betrayal. His hand slipped from your wrist to your hand and his fingers intertwined with yours.
“What is the meaning of this?”
He addressed no names, said no other words. His question hung in the thick air with purpose, his voice straining to keep calm, straining to keep from bursting out in anger, causing a scene in the restaurant.
“Jun, sit down and calm down. We need to talk to you.” Minghao tried to get his best friend to sit and chat, but Jun would have none of it.
“About what, Minghao?? What do the two of you need to tell me?” He turned to you, his eyes full of sadness. “Y/N? What is the meaning of this? Why are you here with Minghao, my best friend? What are the two of you doing behind my back??”
“Jun, listen it’s not what you think-” You tried to get your words in but Jun tugged you to your feet and nodded curtly at Minghao.
“We’re leaving, I’ll talk to you later.” All you could do was send a helpless glance back at Minghao and hurry after Jun as he stormed out of the restaurant. The ride back home in his car was silent.
Your thoughts were running a mile a minute, trying to come up with something, anything to say to Jun to make him calm down and listen to you explain that everything that was in his head right now was a misconception, a misunderstanding, that his emotions were getting the better of him.
Upon entering the apartment you shared together, Jun dropped down onto the couch, staring at you with a look of defeat, of betrayal.
“Jun...” You reached out to take his hand but he wouldn’t let you.
“I love you so much, Y/N, you know that? I try my best to make you happy every day and to show you how much I love you by giving you the happiest life you could ever live. I never complain about how much I suffer because I would never ever want you to be upset or hurt. But you... you... Why did you hurt me like this? With my own best friend?? I- I love my best friend too and... I have always been happy that the two of you got along, and I was scared, I was so scared that you might one day love him more than me because he was always better, always smarter always stronger always more perfect. Day by day, all I could think of was that I wasn’t enough for you, so I kept trying to do more and more for you, and even though you told me you were happy, I-”
You reached out and pulled his larger frame into your arms. Reflexively, his arms wrapped around your waist. His sobs caused his staggering breaths as he held onto you tighter, his fear of losing you overwhelming him.
“I never wanted to tell you how much I feared losing you because I trusted you not to leave me, but as I sunk more and more into the feeling that I could never be good enough, I thought it was better that you should leave, even though I didn’t want you to...”
“Jun...”
“I was going to let you have a chance to leave me tonight, Y/N... I don’t know why... I thought maybe you’d want freedom from someone like me... so I thought that if I loved you so much, I had to let you go, I had to let you have a chance to say goodbye....”
You smiled into Jun’s hair, your own tears dripping down. You hugged him close to you, loving the feeling of his body against your own, his warmth at your side was always a welcome thing. He felt so right in your arms, you knew that you were meant to be.
“Jun, there’s no one who is as perfect for me as you are. You’ve been carrying too much on your own, Junnie. I’m so so glad you’re finally talking to me about this.”
“You- you aren’t seeing Minghao, are you?”
“Jun, I want no one but you. Please let me carry some of your burdens, your feelings. I want to help you too. You want me to be free of struggles and burdens but you know that’s impossible. The most we can do for each other is lessen the burdens by sharing them between the two of us. And that means you too. I want to hear more about your struggles, I don’t want you to be carrying all these burdens inside of you as you have been doing up to this point.”
“Y/N.. I’m sorry for worrying you...”
“I love you. So please please promise me that you won’t keep all these things to yourself? Let me share your burdens and your troubles with you?”
Jun took a long shuddering breath, his mind finally clear of his fears as he held you in his arms. He knew that you were meant to be his till the end of the world, and that his fears would disappear as long as you were at his side.
“I love you too. From now on.. I promise, I promise we can share our troubles.”
He tangled his fingers in yours and pressed his forehead to yours. His eyes searched your face.
“I love you, Y/N, I’m sorry for being like this. I’m sorry for accusing you of cheating on me, you know I didn’t mean to...”
“I know, Jun, I know.”
“...do you think Minghao will understand?”
“He understands. You’ve been under a lot of stress, Junnie, but don’t do this to yourself anymore, okay?”
He smiled at you, his smile full of gratitude and love.
“What did I do to deserve you?” He laughed. He gently caressed your cheek and pressed a loving kiss to your lips.
