#justonemorestep

[isaacjimenezr]

#justonemorestep

[bleufeenix]

Momentary Liberation

We all strive towards that good ol’ wonderful goal of freeing ourselves, the ultimate definition of freedom that fits our views on freedom. Sometimes in the process of getting there, we lose ourselves and then lose our way there....often times we forget what we set out to do in the first place. My quest for freedom & just inner peace has been long and tiresome and I don’t think it’s over just yet. But every now and then, I forget the reasons...the insanity that drives me towards something so far-fetched and quixotic. It’s easier to get caught up in the turmoil & disappointment of the moment, but...every now and then the Universe sends you a sign to hold on and fight through just a little longer.

Times have been very challenging and conflicting recently (well more so recently than it has been in the past.) Every action and decision seems to be a compromise, a compromise for a greater good. The problem is that I haven’t figured out who it’s going to benefit just yet, but with that annoying ability to sorta kinda have all the damn foresight (I’ve decided to flood my brain with) I can afford, an unwanted yet welcome consequence/coping mechanism my brain generated, these decisions seem like the right one that bring some sorta balance to my general world space. I’m not a huge fan of chaos, being so chaotic myself, and maybe I’m being selfish trying to make all the calls that bring more stability v/s personal gain/satisfaction? Who knows anymore? But somewhere between the raging bull of anger & vengeance and the calmness of water one has to make a compromise, or else your thoughts & actions will be the end of you. It’s not supposed to sound that ominous, but, in the world we live in, nobody really has time or space to truly take a moment and try and figure out what’s going on with you....and if they do take the time to do so, it’s in our nature to question and fathom and ulterior motive.

I’m not even sure what I need these days, besides a clone and maybe an upgraded brain to get through the momentary obstacles that will eventually get me to where I wanna be. But hey, you win some, you lose some more and you come out looking like something the cat literally dragged in. While I’ve been ruminating on all that’s been taken and gone, and living with the weight and guilt of actions & consequences for a while, today I heard something. I heard a reminder that literally held my hand through a rough patch not too long ago and brought me this far. My beacon got activated, and I was reminded of the fragility of moments and the sheer nature of how everything is temporary really. The things you do only remain until you remain, then it’s gone just like you when you fade away. The only permanence in these temporary phases is the impact you have on those around you and things around you. I think it was the reminder I needed, the reprieve I needed for this time, the motivation to just keep putting one foot in front of the other. Today, my heart feels a lil’ lighter, my soul isn’t feeling as weighed down as it has...or maybe the effects of spring have finally seeped in to the corners of my being...finally!

[paulkeem]

So scared I'm gonna fail my drug test.

[nascidaameia-noite]

Tenho que parar de regar minhas tristezas com sangue.

[nascidaameia-noite]

Estou sentindo uma puta falta daquelas coisas que não aconteceram, mas que deveriam ter acontecido.

[nascidaameia-noite]

A última coisa que eu queria era me apaixonar. É doloroso, é torturante, é cruel e pode ser até letal. Mas meu coração parecer ser suicida, fazer o que? - (justonemorestep)