#kal thinks

[kal-el-girlblunder]

Worst part about fanfiction is now i have a deep emotional attachment to Young, Holmberg, Haas, and LaPointe yet in canon i have not nary a face nor first NAME to claim these freaks. i now have these visions from god(authors) plaguing my mind BUT NO TANGIBLE PROOF OF THEM IN REALITY(no canon information).

Need Unrivaled to name them pls god, just describe one of them JUST ONE are they a band of blondes, brunettes, does Holmberg have golden tips, does LaPointe have ghost roots, does young activate his bob before games.

I need this group of Hollanov children to give me an identifier so I can pick em out at the station when they get picked up for vandalism JEEZ

[kal-el-girlblunder]

i just got moved in but xfiles is so sexy like i dont know where the cups or the spices are but i DO KNOW mulder is getting pegged and also scully needs a fucking raise cant wait to see if either of them have like middle names or favorite colors or something

[kal-el-girlblunder]

almost comical how against religious interference Mulder is in Revelations like every ep he's explaining how the dirt monster is stealing the left sock off every little boys' foot but Scully suggests a little 12 disciples action and he's as combative as 14 yr old girl who just discovered she hates her mom. like girl we've been working to get Scully emotionally vulnerable and open-minded to weird shit for 70 episodes now and now your discouraging any and all her suggestions.

[kal-el-girlblunder]

And this is unrelated but I HATE when a lady character in fanfiction is like hit with doof's fuckin nerfinator, that I think is his only invention ever with no goddamned self-destruct button like PERRY DO SOMETHINGG.

anyways this is just a fancy way to say STOP NERFING RAVEN "I WHOOP MY DEMON FATHER'S ASS IN MY MIND" ROTH OMGGGG.

if i see her described as petite or little getting her ass kicked one more time I'll scream. If teen titans go did anything it was let yall know baddie put the hours IN, fuckin FBI level sleeper build.

she does not need to be 3 inches tall next to gar's post puberty bean pole ass, let her kick some combat ass ESPECIALLY if these mfs are aged up, you think Robin "I never slip I never fall" WAYNE is letting one member of his team not be a combat beast i dont think soo.

[kal-el-girlblunder]

i wanna find a love like Scully and her fucking gun. if no ones got her that pistol does.

The wind blows a twig too strong Agents Mulder, Scully, and Glock are on the case. Dont let Scully find a reason cause honestly she doesn't want one. I dont even see her pull that shit out anymore I hear scary music and i know that there is a gun glued to her trigger finger.

Mulder he runs in to danger not worried a lick bout nothing, why when everyone and their rubber liver eating neighbors wanna kill him because Scully and and honorary FBI agent Manurhin PPK are ready behind him to just miss the supernatural element of the episode and explain to Mulder that hes being to silly again.

[kal-el-girlblunder]

AND ANOTHER THING I wish Emma got to be more angry dude, like they gave me all those flashbacks of her fighting in the trenches of war as an orphan and then I feel like there wasn't any consequence, like I wish I got more of that season 3 season season 4 isolation or at least side effects of her childhood

Let Emma have like fifteen locks on her doors, give her some issues with touch, no like Im so seriously I love when i see a fic and Emma needs more time to be physically affectionate and needs space to feel at ease cause she's overwhelmed by her emotions or she has an adjustment period to Killian and her family's affection, CRIMINEY CHRIST give her nightmares I beg, she wakes up screaming or someone says something and she has ptsd flashbacks PLEASEEE. Like she stops being alone and all of a sudden she has to save everyone everyday thats like eldest daughter trauma to a degree UNSEEN since Buffy Anne Summers came on the scene.

idk if this is just like a put my favorite character in a blender from hell type post but I just wish I got to see Emma deal with being in a more healthy environment and deal with people caring about her rather than like that being resolved in like an episode or two.

[kal-el-girlblunder]

I understand that there is a child waiting to haunt me in my MSR future ok I KNOW....but i cant- i dont want it pleasseee put it back probe that young man a spaceship superman style let HIM be gay with Batman IDC please.

I'm sure he is a very adorable sweet child and im sure the plot the fandom has concocted for the little family is heartbreaking and beautiful but i cant handle another pregnant female character, get Scully a new gun with her initials on it...a uh yacht maybe a mimosa on the yacht or i dont know she seems like a secret piña colada enjoyer get her those and mulder covered in oil feeding her UFO shaped grapes, ANYTHING BUT A CHILD.

Get this woman a lifetime of being right and poking her hand in dead things with her monogamous open friendship marriage soulmate coworker who leads her to weird shit in the woods every week.

[kal-el-girlblunder]

i do love xfiles personally because of the story and the charatcers and the dana and the mulder whatever but bigger than that i love this nerd show because of the mental damage I can inflict upon my peers when talking about this show.

I bee telling my friends oh yah and then she ran into his room stripped down and he got a breathe away from her bare ass with a candle to inspect some moles or whatever and they'll go wow how late does that happen and i get to smile like a freak and go...episode 1 season 1.

my friends hate to see me come round cause whatever I'm going to say will be followed with 'mind you they are just friends' and ill have to play dodgeball with the projectiles being hurled my way.

"yah they were trapped in a room together and had to caress each others' skin to check for the bubonic plague and then get really close to each others faces before solving the mystery....mind you next episode mulder hangs out with his ex girlfriend oh and also THEY ARE COLLEAGUES".

BOOM someone is throwing a chair at me this show is so amazing.