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Dear Husband

I woke up today energized . I am reminded I need to do my final work out to post my stats to end a 2 month Whole life Challenge. I am grateful of your great achievement of leading 200 plus people from around the globe as our captain. You have led them everyday with your positive insight to continue to make healthy choices everyday for 60 days. You have dedicated part of your mornings inspiring people to be the best person they can be. I have to say I am so proud of you. I have transformed in this challenge in spite of what life brought everyday. The challenges of navigating the streets of Los Angeles, balancing our household, getting enough rest and sleep, raising a puppy and keeping it clean without the aid of sugar and alcohol. It has been a successful challenge. It started with meditation to quiet the mind and ended with kindness as the most appropriate lifestyle challenge. I hope you get to lead us again in January so we can purge the remnants of the coming holiday merriments.

I understand your heartbreak as a result of the elections. It is expected since you feel and love deeply. We share the same heart break since we share the same vision of what America is all about. Thank you for the comfort as I cried to sleep that night. I know it must have been so hard to comfort when you also needed to be soothed.

I see you carry the pain everyday since. I have resolved to meditate and give loving kindness to the future government. This is one thing I can do that I have power over. As a Buddhist my dear husband I know this is in your nature. I refused to be paralyzed by fear. All we have is today and the now. I have to hope that my fears will never come about. I am super vigilant of my world today. I am after all an American of color. I can hide my color with my last name but to the world that see me I am brown. Everyone is shaped by their culture, stories and experiences. I am grateful I live in California where I feel safe and secure.

The world is ever changing. Sometimes it is hard to see or notice that it is until something big happens that opens our awareness. We are surrounded by leaves falling and a new season. We will be surrounded by a new government and new political decisions very soon. I do not have the answers to the world’s questions. All I know is that there is a bigger picture and more will be revealed. I cannot try logic to explain how things turned this time. I have to trust and hope we will be all be ok.

It is my hope that we will do our best to make our world better. You will be training for the Los Angeles marathon. You will be raising money for cancer and the sick children and their families. You will continue to kind, compassionate and helpful. You will soon find the inspiration to share good stories on Facebook .You will do great things in spite of the world changing .

I came to this country as a tourist with 1 suitcase. A kind Jewish man helped me legitimize my stay in this country. I became a citizen on my own through hard work and believing the American dream. I am now an American and my core beliefs as a human being I have retained. I have embraced my country the way I was embraced with all the love I needed. I will continue to give back some of the love. I resolve we will continue to love our neighbors , families and friends wether we share the same political beliefs or not. I am more than my vote and so are you. Hurt can transform to compassion. I resolve to not hate just because someone hates. It starts with me, with you and our home. We are human beings who just want everyone to love. We will not feed the monster of fear because hope is bigger than that.

I love you Phill Kane, Jethro , friends and America ! We are all here together.