Creating balance when Life shows up
It has been a hectic 2 weeks at home. Phill my husband is on a new TV show and that just premiered last week. He was just promoted to location manager and work life is hectic. He has had severe nose bleeds the past 2 weeks that resulted in numerous emergency rooms , urgent care visit and consultation visits with his ENT doctor. I did not realize that ENT doctors are hard to find in ER hospitals. We live in Los Angeles and I can say 3 different ER hospital visits and no ENT doctor unless you are bleeding out. In one hospital you have to literally drive yourself to a hospital with a ENT doctor after they patch you up. I now have knowledge which hospitals to go and that is the kind of information one has to have in our state of the health industry.
My work specially at the end of the month is busy and entails a lot of concentration . I work in customer service and handles the company’s #1 customer.
It feels like life has been showing up with such intensity lately. Phill’s dad passed away and we are suppose to go to Connecticut for his memorial on Thursday . Phill is facing a possible surgery on Tuesday and we will not know until tomorrow the prognosis . We are both attempting to balance work and what life is bringing . There is uncertaint , fear , stress and chaos.
We have been in this situation before and maybe not the same circumstance but the feelings are the same . The feelings of trying to restore some kind of sanity when the world is so uncertain .
In spite of being familiar with addressing what life brings I am reminded today of the tools that I have to keep me sane and present .
I work in a Textile manufacturing company. My work day starts at waking up at 3:30 am everyday so I can be at my home office at 4:30 am ready to answer phone calls and emails. My main customers are back east in a different time zone. I do not have the same stress as an Emergency room hospital but stress comes in different forms . Chaos in my industry can mean a late delivery that is expected at 6 am Eastern time and that means I am not even awake in my time zone .
I have learned some tools to help me restore some kind of balance at work and at home.
At work I am excellent at anticipating customer needs . I have worked with logistic companies to automate tracking of urgent freight deliveries. My customer knows if a delivery is late while I am barely waking up in Los Angeles. I wake up at emails with a mixed bag of grateful customer that received his order or delays because of myriad reasons like weather, accidents etc. One time a driver literally walked away from his truck and left a load in Kentucky . The freight company had to get the highway patrol involve in this situation. It is amazing what one email can do so my customers can make the necessary adjustment on their end and make life a little better. Communication is key always in my job. I provide information even before my customers will ask for it. It eliminates unnecessary panic for all of us. I am good at anticipating customer needs and I reap the rewards later . I have to say I have a folder that is called Kudos . I read it when I need motivation .
We all approach work differently regardless of what we do.. My engineering background allows me to look at everything like a picture in landscape . It has allowed me the flexibility to prioritize specially when deadlines are involved. I work 2 hours from home and I tackle LA traffic at 6:30 am . I have learned to face traffic by listening to NPR on the way to work. Listening to news and keeping up to date with the world gives me a sense of connection. It relaxes me and keeps me present. If you heard about driving in Los Angeles I can tell you it is not fun specially if you pass by downtown or when the President is in town. Listening to news that in other parts of the world food is scarce and human rights does not exist transforms my traffic frustrations to gratitude . My traffic turmoils is nothing to being faced without food to eat . This too, traffic that is will pass and in some days when school is off I get some reprieve.
7:30 am most of the time I make it on time and that means mid morning back east . I have voice mails to address, emails to answer, orders to enter while new phone calls and emails keep coming.This is where the art of prioritizing comes. I look at the landscape that is my work load and address which comes first . I will tackle from high priority to least . It varies what is immediate . 13 years of customer service and working for my company has given me some kind of wisdom to tackle multiple screens of incoming emails and switching from one Oracle screen to the other. My moments can vary from entering an order, answering a phone call, giving out product information and pricing, addressing an emergency order that might deliver same day in Rochester New York or Florida, tracking an order that was misrouted , addressing an inventory alert that means shorting a high profile order/customer or just helping a customer in panic on the other line of the phone. How do I handle all of these and maintain a semblance of balance ? There are days I handle it well. There are days that are tough and needs a lot of self acceptance .I read some emails from my Kudos folder to keep me going .
I learned certain things that I do at work to maintain balance. I have an Apple watch that alerts me to stand when I am sitting too long and alerts me to take deep breaths to self regulate. I also hydrate at work and I measure my water intake. I drink half my body weight in ounces .I take my 15 minute walk at 11:30 pm most of the time regardless of how hectic my day is. Sitting down for long hours is not good for my body so I stretch whenever I can even when I am sitting down. I also bring healthy food choices most of the time . It is so easy to eat mindlessly specially at the office. I always have some protein and fresh or dried fruit . On Monday’s I dress up to show up for work. I take pride in the fashion I bring to work specially on a Monday because sometimes a weekend like mine right now can feel dragging .
How do I stay focus at work specially now that Phill is not well ? I always sleep early during a work week and that means 8:30 am . We had to deal with ER last Thursday and got home at 1:00 am . That means it was impossible to work the following day . It was good time to take a sick day . I have a day left after this and lots of vacation days. I normally have healthy boundaries and so does my husband . We are both in work modes when we are at work . We only call each other if there is an emergency so we are not interrupted.
Outside of work I have learned some kind of physical activity helps with restoring balance. I have done 2 half marathons and discovered that I have the discipline to follow training for a race. The same discipline that allows me to carve time , a me time to what my doctor say “pump the heart” . My Apple Watch monitors my resting heart rate too . My vitals on a recent physical is good and no kind of medications are needed to keep up with life. My husband leads an online Health and Fitness program and I join so I can refocus on well being. Food has been my source of comfort growing up so stress can make me seek out what will make me feel better instantly but not in the long run. I do yoga although I am working on a regular practice. I subscribe to Farm Fresh that allows me to have fresh fruit and vegetables delivered. I am lucky to live where organic store is just a 10 minute walk . I can literally go to market everyday if there is time for it. I food prep during the weekend so our food at home is set for the week. This ensures that fast food is a less tempting choice.
My husband and I also have health insurance that allows us to go to Therapy . Yes we talk to a professional that can listen to us without any agenda except for our individual well being. Mental state is important to face our life . Although we are married we have different past experiences. There are things that only a trained therapist can address . I am grateful I can talk to someone every Thursday and have someone see my life and struggles from a different perspective. I have life trauma like death and grief that therapy addresses. I have learned what I can do to soothe myself. Music and concerts helps. I do aromatherapy at home and essential oils keeps me grounded. I live near Griffith Park and I am grateful I can just close my front door and take a hike if I need some balance. I also live close to a yoga studio so I can walk with my mat if my head needs some clearing .We live close to the Greek Theater so we are fortunate that we can walk and see a concert during the summer. I love trees and I happen to live in a street lined up with very old trees. On days that life is uncertain I find solace at looking at this magnificent tree outside my window . The tree ressures me that all is well in the world and enables me to stay focus in the moment . Today as I scribble this, it is Sunday afternoon. Our English bulldog is contently snoring in the background. I had groceries delivered so I can be a nurse to my husband. Right now I can breathe and say I am ok and I am present.