#katiegoldin

[bunnyearswebstuff-blog]

Moisturize Until You're Frictionless And Entering The Speed Force

What is your greatest asset? Your career? Children? Your good public works? Enough kidding around: It is your skin—your priceless, irreplaceable human pelt—that makes you worthwhile. You only have one skin (unless you have Zuckerberg-levels of money and can buy and wear the skin of the young) so you must care for it lest you turn into a horrific, craggly reptile monster whose pores are so big, passerbys might fall in and sue you. To prevent this disgusting fate, you must moisturize until there is no dryness, no pores, no features on your skin at all. Your skin must achieve perfect, frictionless smoothness. (We recommend Mack’s grease)  Read the full article

[bunnyearswebstuff-blog]

How Many Patterned Prints Can You Layer Before You Upset Xxottlogyax?

Hello fellow fashionistas! It’s chilly weather season! And you know what that means: layers! To truly be a fashion maven, you should express yourself by being bold and layering different types of printed clothes. Rock a pair of polka dot pants and a paisley shirt, #werk a houndstooth skirt with a floral jacket, and violently assault the eyes of the elderly with a fierce zebra-stripe pant under a herringbone jacket. Since it may be tempting to go a little to cray cray with the overlay, here are a few friendly do’s, don’ts, and dare-nots lest ye incur the wrath of XXottlogyax the Textiles God, whose judgment is violent and final. Read the full article