kyungmi’s note. no because this plot? so down bad for. it’s the fact that we all eventually have to move on even if it’s hard to do so. emotional hwajin, i really live for.
content warning. a LOT of sadness but happiness. it’s a good mixture of both. hwajin really falls hard and fast for reader. innocent touching. yearning. he needs and deserves happiness so falling for you is what gave him all that back. kissing. really? just love and affection.
the request! Can I request something with Na Hwajin, where he begins falling for his colleague (reader) but is conflicted since it feels like he’s betraying his deceased fiancé? (I think it’s also sweet to include Mr. Choi being encouraging towards him to procure reader)? Please and thank you!!
now playing. . .
──── ୨୧ ──── ──── ୨୧ ────
the sound of your screaming was the only thing he heard and the blurred silhouette of your body running towards him before everything went quiet, still, and dark. this mission wasn’t exactly what any of you were expecting. the students were far more worse than the other schools you’ve already visited and finished.
before the incident.
hwajin found himself watching you. you’d speak and his eyes immediately followed, watching the way your lips moved or how you smiled about something. when you frowned? it was the worst feeling. he didn’t want you to be upset or ever feel upset. this feeling was killing him.
“hwa? i took a look at this student..”
you started, but didn’t finish. he was already looking at you. you had to admit.. it made you feel a bit insecure. why would he stare at you? was it your facial expression or the way you spoke a bit loud at times. instead of him asking you to continue like he usually did, he stared.
“s-so.. it looks like he’s not only being bullied but they’re forcing him to scam people after school. when he’s caught he’s beat up by people who were scammed and i feel this is a bit more..”
you stopped again. hwajin’s staring was so intense that it was hard to breathe. his handsome features always made you so nervous and the way his arms were crossed over his broad chest.. what were you even thinking? he lost a wife only two years ago. how could you think of him like that? you were awful. so awful.
“you’re doing an amazing job.”
his sudden compliment took you by surprise and you bowed your head kindly, “thank you hwajin.”
that wasn’t the first time he had done this…
just as a student was about to hit you, hwajin grabbed ahold of your waist and pulled you back behind him, effortlessly shielding you from the hit. you gasped at how fast he was and how quick he was to protect you.
“boys don’t hit girls. weren’t you taught that?”
hwajin slapped him instead sending him flying across the room. sure you were still new and all but the way he protected you felt different. not like before.. when he wouldn’t even glance your way. now? that’s all he did was look at you, compliment you, touch you in certain areas that made your heartbeat quicken.. was this love?
it couldn’t be.
“we need to talk.”
hwajin sat down on the couch that sat in his empty and cold living room. mr. choi continued to stand, grabbing the photo of his daughter who hwajin had placed there years ago. he was close to saying something, a quiet ‘put that down’ but he didn’t which was weird of him.
“isn’t it time for you to be happy?”
“if this is about y/n then—”
mr. choi chuckled. of course it was about you. why wouldn’t it be? he saw everything. from the way hwajin stared at you to the compliments and even the lingering touches. what he had noticed is how happy and relaxed he seemed to be around you.
“it’s time. you’ve sent her off well and you’ll continue to love her for the rest of your life but she would want you to be happy. to find happiness.”
a tear rolled down hwajin’s cheek. it was warm. a bit red from the soju and he took a deep breath. not knowing what to say or do next so he stayed quiet and mr. choi understood. gently patted his shoulder and left the apartment where hwajin was left alone to cry and think about his feelings. truly? he wanted you.
another day. another school. another bully. hwajin had one and you had your own. a girl that broke in front of you that didn’t want to be this way anymore and you felt you could believe it.. until more problems came and she lied. it was stressful. exhausting. you sat in the office and waited for the next move. the right next move that was and hwajin took a seat next to you.
“hey pretty. you feeling okay?”
pretty. he’d never spoke to you like that before. it made you.. feel weird. that weird feeling in your belly. that weird feeling that women usually got around men who made them happy, shy, and excited. did he feel it too?
“y-yeah! just.. thinking. this one is a bit difficult.”
hwajin nodded and his hand then rested on your own. his thumb rubbed your index finger, “you’re doing so well. don’t give up, hm? we’ve got this. together.” and you finally looked at him. staring into his eyes that seemed so much more happier and lively. although he still cried every night wondering if this was a good idea. wondering if he was forgetting his deceased wife a bit too fast.. mr. choi urged him to go for happiness.
you three found a small restaurant to have lunch. finally being able to just relax and take care of your body after weeks of hard work. hwajin sat beside you, his chair a lot closer than it was originally placed. you shrugged it off but mr. choi? noticed. watched. his thin lips curled up into a smile watching hwajin smile. a genuine smile that he hadn’t seen in a long time.
“want to try some of my japchae? here, i’ll feed you.”
and you leaned in closer to his side, parting your lips for him to feed you. once you took the bite, he leaned in and smiled, “good huh? i’ll share with you.” but was that just an excuse to sit closer? he even forgot mr. choi who had been sitting across from you both.
“oh. you have some..”
hwajin took his thumb, wiping the corner of your mouth and licking it off which made your eyes widened. that’s something only couples did or.. two people that liked each other. “you’re so cute sometimes.” another.. compliment. he was more open than ever. nudging you at times and laughing, feeding you, wiping your mouth, paying for your meal, wanting to be alone with you..
it was all adding up. hwajin was in love with you.
it wasn’t confirmed until.. the incident.
you paced the waiting room, unable to think properly or sit down. he was in surgery. nothing like this had ever happened before but the student.. damn that student! had awful people above him. going as far as severely injuring hwajin. “sit sweetheart. he’s going to be ok.” mr. choi tried his best to calm you and keep you from having a panic attack but how could you? he was hurt-
“excuse me? are you both with na hwajin?”
you were quick to nod and run over towards the doctor who gave you the best news. his surgery went well. it would take him a few weeks to recover and that was when you knew, he needed you the most.
once he was in his own room, you sat beside him. laid half of your body next to him and slept. slept with him, holding his hand. hwajin woke up before you, smiling from happiness seeing you there. he was weak but was still desperate to touch you. feel you.
“pretty girl.”
his sweet voice pulled you from slumber and your eyes widened seeing that he was awake, “hwa! are you ok? do i need to get the doctor?” but he shook his head. what he needed? was you. only you. “come here.”
he pulled you onto the bed with him and you tried not to make it too uncomfortable but his arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer than you intended to be but.. it felt right. “you’re such a sweet girl.” he whispered softly and you smiled, “my sweet girl.”
“w-what?” and before you could say anything else he leaned up just a bit to press his lips against your own.
the kiss was sweet. slow. he reached up and grabbed the back of your neck in a gentle manner, stopping you from pulling away. he tilted his head, deepening the kiss which caused you to whimper and he smiled against your lips.
“what do you say, we have an official date after i get out of here?” and you nodded, leaning in to kiss him a hundred times if that was even possible.
a/n: i wasn't joking when i wrote in my bio that i write whatever i think of loll. this has also made me realize how terrible i am with titles. there's not nearly enough 'x reader' fics on this man and that is so not okay. i hope you guys like reading this!!
(ps: for the people who saw my last post before i deleted it, i am better now and will be returning to my irregular schedule of writing!!)
"____,"
The voice of the new ERPB inspector called out to you, catching you off-guard. The hallways were empty. Classes were over for the day, and you'd been on your way home after working later than usual. You quickly adjusted your glasses and turned around to face the intimidatingly taller man.
He'd been lurking around the school for the past two days, specifically in your classes. He'd witnessed how you'd explain everything so gently to the students while none of them cared enough to listen, how you gave teaching your all while they seemed preoccupied with their own devices.
He'd noticed how well you'd present yourself each day, with a bright smile that sparkled up your eyes despite the students' disrespect.
.☆°☆•
DAY 1:
"Ms. ____, isn't your skirt a bit too short today? Are you trying to impress someone?"
The student laughed as he pointed out something which was in no way related to the literature you were teaching, and also completely false considering the skirt reached your knees. Hwa-Jin observed the interaction from the corner, arms crossed and eyes glaring into the back of the students' head.
"Ah, no, that's not it. I wore it because it matched my top."
You'd smile and respond politely before bringing everyone back into whatever Robert Frost you were reciting. The inspector noticed the way they all went back to doing their own thing. He didn't interrupt this time.
He listened to your lesson while also keeping track of which student stood out most when it came to disrespecting you.
.☆°☆•
DAY 2:
"Ooh, you're wearing jewelry today. I knew it, you are trying to impress someone. Is it that inspector? You've been dressing up a lot since he came here."
The same student from the previous day spoke out again. Tae-Byun was his name, Hwa-Jin had made Geun-Dae do his research the previous night. Around the school, the girls referred to him as 'Byun-Tae' instead, which meant 'Pervert'.
It was clear you weren't the sole target to his comments when such a name circulated around the entire building amongst every teacher and every student.
You took in a deep breath and got ready to sweetly dismiss his comment again, only to be cut off.
"No, it's-"
"Does that really matter right now? Are you learning literature or fashion?"
Hwa-Jin interrupted you abruptly, his eyes landing on the student who had the audacity to disrespect you a second time in his presence. He'd let the first one slide, but he was starting to get agitated too.
He couldn't explain why he felt so much more frustrated than usual when it came to you. He'd dealt with disrespectful students a million times but something about the way he spoke to you made the inspector's blood boil.
"No way, I was totally right. You're defending your girl, aren't you?"
You stared at the tense interaction between the two, silent since you knew you should just let the ERPB do their job. But you didn't want any of the students to end up injured as a result, you'd heard multiple times of the consequences other rebellious people had faced.
"So what if I am?"
Hwa-jin responded casually as he stood up straight, away from the wall where he had been leaning, and approached the student seated down on his desk.
You couldn't help the way your heart raced at the fact that he didn't deny it. No, not just that, but he played into the comment. He didn't even seem affected by it, and you made sure to act like you weren't either.
To act like the student hadn't been right on the dot when he called you out for dressing up to impress a certain inspector.
The ring of the bell broke you out of your thoughts, and Hwa-jin finally backed away from the student. He leaned back against the wall, face tilting up to look at you as the students ran out before you could even dismiss them.
You knew you couldn't control them as they hurried away, the same way you couldn't control the racing of your heart when you were alone in the classroom with the inspector.
"I'm sorry about what he said. It was totally out of line, especially when he knows about your-"
"Don't worry, I didn't mind it. It's about time I moved on like that old man said anyways."
He sighed before leaving the room as well. Your heart was beating even faster than before. He didn't mind people assuming you two were in a relationship? He was trying to move on from his dead fiance because of you?
You shook your head, trying to shake away the thoughts along with it. No, you were overthinking it. He'd started this entire project with his father-in-law as a result of the violence she'd endured that took her life. There was no way in hell a man of that sort would ever think of being with a doormat like you, let alone move on from the incident because of a teacher that was easily controlled by the students.
.☆°☆•
PRESENT TIME:
"Ah, sorry. We're not on first name basis yet."
"I don't mind!"
You replied a little too quickly, causing him to pause and stare down at you as you mentally beat yourself up over the enthusiasm.
"I mean, I think referring to each other in any other way would be too formal. We're not exactly strangers at this point, are we?"
Two days was all it took to have you over-explaining yourself like a fool to make sure he didn't get the wrong impression of you. Two days, and you were already acting like you guys were friends and he wasn't a stranger.
"We're not that close either."
He responded in that same tone he always used with every student and every teacher. You had never had more of an urge to bury yourself deep into the ground. You hoped the ground would open up and suck you within, that you could hibernate beneath the Earth's surface until the ERPB had finished their duty.
Of course, it'd only been two days. You were closer to strangers than anything else.
"You're right. Sorry, I got ahead of myself..."
You laughed awkwardly, giving him a smile so forced that it made the entire situation much worse. You let the horrifying moment of silence sit between you two before drifting your gaze back to his polished shoes.
"The next time a student speaks out like that to you, don't just stand there and take it."
His advice brought you back to reality as you turned your gaze back up to face him again, expecting him to point it out but not so randomly.
"It wasn't that big of a deal. All he said is that I'm dressing up to impress someone, I don't want to be too harsh on him over a comment."
And also because you knew the student had been completely right. You dressed up for Na Hwa-Jin the last two days. The damn inspector who was uncaring and solely here for the purpose of fulfilling his job.
"It's not one comment though, is it? And it's not only about you, think of all the other girls in this school having to deal with his comments. All the diligent students being disturbed because one couldn't shut his mouth up."
You were silent as you processed his words. He had a point. The reason he'd even earned the name of 'Byun-Tae' around campus was because he would repeatedly disturb every existing female around him. You took in a breath and acknowledged his words with a nod.
"If a teacher won't help her students, then who will? They all rely on you, ____, to be the responsible adult for them."
You let out the breath you were holding until you stopped breathing entirely. There it was, your first name again. You understood what he was saying, you processed the way he said it like he was teaching you a lesson you should've learnt from the beginning, and then you finally heard your name.
"I thought we weren't close enough for first names yet?"
"I changed my mind."
And then he walked off like he hadn't absolutely shattered your heart seconds ago by acting distant then stitched the pieces back up together by acting like that never happened.
That night, your heart decided to stop helping you. You followed the same procedure you always did whenever it decided to turn on you.
Inhale. Hold. Exhale. Close your eyes.
The first three steps failed entirely, so you skipped over to the last one instead of repeatedly trying again. If you closed your eyes, you wouldn't be able to see anything. Surely, you'd fall asleep naturally.
But when you did, all you could see was him dressed in all black. His perfectly done hair, those wrinkles that looked like they'd been sculpted with loving hands, and his eyes.
Oh, his eyes.
You let out a sigh as your eyes fluttered open again, realizing you were never escaping this mess you had gotten yourself into.
.☆°☆•
THE NEXT DAY:
You thought of the multiple ways you could discipline Tae-Byun today while teaching your class, noticing his absence but assuming it was a result of his habit of constantly being late. A scolding as the first warning, ruler to the hand as the second, standing in the corner of the class as the third, sent to the principal as the fou-
You could barely finish your thoughts when the door to the class was shoved open by the inspector, before he threw inside a disheveled Tae-Byun.
His pants were ripped upto his knees, exposing the rest of his legs. His collar was ripped open, exposing his collarbones. His shoes were barely on, exposing the dirty underside of his clearly unwashed socks. Aside from his appearance, bruises coated the side of his face as if he'd been slapped multiple times, the blood staining his lips matching the shade of lipstick on yours.
"He seemed really interested in your top, so I gave him a similar one. I hope you don't mind."
Hwa-Jin stated with a grin before quickly switching back to his serious look, dragging the student across the floor and to his desk.
Class resumed like normal with no interruptions, but you could feel the inspector's eyes staring at your back as you turned towards the board. It seemed you didn't even have to discipline him for now, not when he was there like some sort of bodyguard.
Once classes ended, Tae-Byun stumbled back home. He avoided his usual route to prevent coming across both you and the inspector. You stood outside your class, mumbling underneath your breath as you fiddled with the bracelet around your wrist, reciting what you'll say when you see him.
He'll be leaving today, now that his lesson had been taught. He'd made sure both you and your terrible student had each learned the value of existing in a school, and the difference in responsibility which was present between a teacher and a student.
"'Thank you, Mr. Inspecto-' Ah, that's way too much. 'I really appreciate what you did for me today, Hwa-Jin'. Geez, I don't think I should call him by his first name. We're not that close anyways."
You sighed again as you tossed your head back against the wall, the deep exhale now a part of your hourly routine whenever you thought of him. You closed your eyes, took in a deep breath, and decided to say whatever came into your mind first.
"Na Hwa-Jin, I'm really glad you were there today. Thank you for the help, and for...teaching me to be a better teacher. I appreciate your advice, I don't know if I'll ever be able to repay you for opening my eyes-"
"You could always make it up to me over dinner."
You didn't even want to open your eyes when you heard his voice. You felt like banging your head into the wall until you were out of this reality where he'd heard every single word you'd uttered. 'Opening my eyes', really? You couldn't think of anything better that sounded less like you were worshipping him?
But then you processed his words, and your eyes shot open. He wanted to go to dinner with you? He was asking you out on a date?
"I'm not asking you out."
He clarified as if he could read your mind through your wide eyes. The sudden flutter you'd felt in your stomach died down, only to be brought back as quickly and confusingly.
"I'm asking you to ask me out. Your treat."
What kind of guy even was he? One second, he could be a gentleman fighting off people that dared to disrespect you. Then you take another glance, and he's asking you to pay to take him out on a date and playing difficult with you by purposefully phrasing his sentences in that way.
Oh well, you couldn't care less in this moment. It was too good of an offer to pass up.
"Does barbeque work?"
You asked with a slight smile, removing your reading glasses now that classes were no longer in session. You placed them in your purse as you began walking, knowing well that he was matching your pace beside you.
You didn't know if this would turn into something more, you weren't a fortune teller to predict the future, but you didn't want to either. You wanted to live in this moment, where the two of you were leaving behind the empty school to enjoy barbecue together.
And maybe, just maybe, this wouldn't be the last time you saw each other.
❤︎ the most genuine man you’ve ever met. him and his friend who was now known as gunwoo fought about a piece of meat, leaving it flying to your table right next to your plate. the rest? was history. beautiful history.
❤︎ “how can I make you feel better, my love?”
❤︎ his large hands are always on you. grabbing ahold of your own. on your waist. on the tops of your thighs and giving them a gentle yet playful squeeze. sometimes he leans down to press a kiss on your skin in a loving way.
❤︎ “you’re the most beautiful girl ever. I love you.”
❤︎ the big spoon. it’s rare he allows you to hold in. in his mind, he must protect you. he must be the one to be in such a position. this way he’s allowed to hold you if you have a bad dream or you need some sort of comfort / warmth. something you can’t get if you were the one that was holding him. he just loves holding you lots.
❤︎ “come sit on my lap and let me feed my girl.”
❤︎ fights for you. no matter what, who, where, and why. he will fight for you. things don’t always have to get so complicated and violent but he’s never afraid to make it turn that way. you’re his world. he can’t have you in any sort of distress that ruins your day. your happiness is his top priority and concern at all times. always will be.
❤︎ “shower with me. I just need you tonight.”
❤︎ kisses 24/7 with this man. someone would have to forcefully pry him off of you because it’s constant. he loves you so much, adores you so much, wants to give you the entire world. his kisses for the most part are so soft. some aren’t but those are more needy. he’ll is your lips, hands, fingers, neck, nose, arms, stomach, and legs. praises your body as he presses them all over you.
There's a chance you could write something about Gwan Sik being madly in love with reader, but he doesn't know how to approach her because he feels a bit embarrassed that he's just the son of a fisherman, and she's a beautiful girl from a wealthy family, and one day for some reason reader goes to the market for the first time in her life and sees him working and falls madly in love with him so she makes sure to go to his stall to buy fish from him every week, but every time she does , he avoids her gaze, or runs inside so reader can be served by Gwan Sik's grandmother instead of him, so reader thinks he hates her when in reality he's just hiding so she doesn't see him working there because he feels embarrassed ps: she doesn't care that he's the son of a fisherman or that his family is dedicated to selling fish... she thinks he's the cutest and most hardworking boy in jeju 🧡
:: Your eyes tell me...
— Yang . Gwansik
GENRE: Fluff
WARNINGS: Yang Gwan-sik is awkward. Korean words used for grandparents, food, fish, etc. Your close with your grandparents. Ae-sun pulls tricks out. She/they pronouns for reader.
SYNOPSIS: "Yang Gwan-sik, his eyes always tell, even if his embarrassment overrides his love. Ae-sun sees, his grandma sees and even your grandpa sees. But you're too busy admire him to see his eyes..."
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Thank you so much for this request. Perhaps, the ending got sloppy and it got a bit weird. Please give feedback to improve, NICELY. Thanks for reading!! Reblogging is very appreciated.
DURATION・・・・・3.5K
The cold wind dries skin faster than Gwan-sik likes to admit it does, as he rubs more moisturizer from his mother's purse against his cheeks, rosy and raw now. Hands attempting to warm up by rubbing them roughly—his eyes scanned the market with a smile, as he spoke usual market slogans.
"Want a cabbage?" he offered an old lady with a smile, Ae-sun— busy as always— reading some book labelled 'spring time' with series of poems about Jeju dating back war times. His hand rubbing against the cream, as he tried to ignore the sticky and slipperiness of it, but hands felt better. Fabric not snatching on the dry skin.
"Mackerels? Do you have more?" a voice asked as Gwan-sik paused, hurriedly pulling on his gloves, a simple smile on his lips and looked up. Only to freeze—
Dragon King will seriously end him one of these days..
He wonders if you were personally hand-made by Dragon King. If you were one of his precious one—No..!
"Uh, we do." he mumbled, standing up awkwardly, "one second—..Let me get halmeoni.." he mumbled, ushering to the side quickly as Ae-sun looked up from behind her book and at him utterly confused. Why does he need his halmeoni?
"Why do you even need halmeo—", "She can help." Gwan-sik said firmly, shooting Ae-sun a look which made her pause and turn back to her book, albeit confused.
You looked back at him. The starry eyes, the sweetest smile, the perfect hair despite the little mess from winter winds and slightly reddened nose, ears and lips. Chapped and trying to preserve heat. Grey-maroon cardigan, likely from school which he used almost all time.
Gwan-sik immediately looked away, rushing to get his grandma. His grandma sat beside the other haenyeo women, sharing a large bowl of bibimbap, mixing rice, seaweed, eggs or mackerel if it's not upto par for sale at their shop. Also to conserve energy in such snowy-cold months of Jeju.
Gwan-sik approaching his grandma, who sat aside silently making herself some sort of roll to chew, using seaweed when she looked up at him, "Aish, what happened? Something wrong at the stall?" she asked, "Can you serve the girl instead of me?" he asked.
His grandmother looked up, squinting her eyes, "What? Why?" he asked, as Gwan-sik silently groaned, "Can you just do it? She's part of some rich family, she's pretty..and she speaks nicely. Just serve her fish, I'll go back then—!" he said, trying to usher his halmeoni up. His grandmother sighed, putting down her spoon as his mother snorted,
"Your mouth gets sewn shut in-front of pretty girls, is that it? Yah, your brat. You're just to sell fish, not admire girls!" she said, waving her spoon as if to make him understand as he nodded nervously. His grandmother, all the while, walked back.
"Yah, what do you need?" she asked, voice gentle, despite it's gruffness. You looked up, awkward and nervous, fidgeting with your bracelet as she looked down, pulling out a slip from the bag you brought with you, reading out what you might need.
His grandmother handed it all and you paid for it quickly. Your eyes fell on the Yang boy. Yang Gwan-sik, that's his name..He was so beautiful, in a rugged but in a soft way. Like his rough palms might be warm to hold, his smile was undoubtedly cute when he troubled Ae-sun or listened to her talk about poets of Korea.
He was nice and kind, didn't bend to the pressure like steal and had a BIG heart to fulfill anyone wants or needs. He seemed to understand one's needs and worked hard. And you desperately hoped you'd see him again as you walked down the market road. He was cute.
—
And again and again. Whenever your grandpa had some things to buy from the Yangs, any sort of fish or abelones. You'd pipe up first. You visited just to see the boy of Yangs. Even if half the time you'd been unable to even try to make eye contact with him. Your eyes flitting on his stall or the cabbages right beside his own rather than the eyes. And almost disappointingly, whenever you came, he'd went and get his grandma or eomma to help you.
Ae-sun would always greet you with a smile, she'd begun noticing the daughter of the rich family in Dodong-rii always visiting their stall when there were a few more around. She could guess why, but never said it aloud for your dignity.
"Let me get my eomma—wait." he said, walking off, his hands rubbing together. You looked at the back of his head, his shoulders broad and smell of seaweed and kimchi lingered on him longer than it should've.
Ae-sun hummed softly, reading her book, quickly glancing at you and then awkwardly at the empty chair beside hers, offering you a smile. "Nice day, hm?" she whispered as you nodded, "It's pretty nice." You nodded to the girl,"Reading about poets again?"Ae-sun nodded, "Yeah."
"What's the boy's name?" You asked tenderly, picking at your nails and a spare thread on the bag. Ae-sun looked up, smiling apologetically and understandingly, "That's Gwan-sik. He's a bit..weird, but don't worry. He's nice" She assured.
You nodded. You and her talked for a few seconds before Gwan-sik's mother walked over, gently hitting his back, "You can't even serve people now. Aish, Dragon King has no need for such useless servants." she hissed, helping you get fishes and everything. You thanked her, packing up stuff and pretending to count, while glancing up at Gwan-sik to perhaps meet his eyes. That didn't work..it was a failure, his eyes more busy staring at the ground, a soft huff on his lips. Perhaps of annoyance..? You didn't like that.
You didn't get a chance to talk to him, no matter how much you tried. He'd always seemed a bit troubled or overwhelmed with something whenever you walked back or smiled at him. When you waved to them in passing, Ae-sun always smiled back with a bright wave of her hand, but Gwan-sik only seemed to stare like you were doing something wrong or out-of-this-world.
You didn't know or perhaps you tried to console yourself that maybe he just seemed to be going through a bad time, but it happened again, quite the next week—
"Halmeoni—" Gwan-sik stood up, wordlessly moving off as his grandmother stood down. His eyes barely looking into your, flitting nervously like he hoped you'd be gone.
Or..
Gwan-sik hummed, nudging Ae-sun to help you. She looked up, utterly confused from her book, not used to being asked to sell. But all the same, she offered it to you, "It's all fresh, don't worry!" she assured. Not that that was thing you needed assurance on.
It was the same, every time. Seriously... you could seriously tell something was wrong, not when he kept moving around to sell Ae-sun's cabbage or his fish without a problem to anyone who wasn't you. Like serving you caused him itches or rashes.
It didn't seem like the Yangs' elder son liked you a lot, in fact, he didn't seem like he liked you AT ALL.
—
And it was a day like that. The sky a perpetual grey, cold and dry. As always, he wordlessly moved as his grandma approached when she noticed you were there. Her hand softly helping as you dug out your grandpa's list from your bag. Insteading of reading, you just handed it to his halmeoni. She turned to get you your fish.
All the while, your eyes roamed his figure again, trying to meet Gwan-sik's eyes too. You cleared your throat, as if desperate to have the beautiful and handsome boy's attention. Not that it worked, he barely looked at you. It put a bit of disappointment in you.
All the while Gwan-sik felt his pulse increase, and skip beats more than he'd like to admit. And you looked down, mumbling out what you got.
"Mackerel, abelones and a few galchis.." you said. His grandmother hummed, weighing everything and counting and wrapping them quickly for you. You quickly counted out the money, offering it to Gwan-sik purposefully.
Gwan-sik looked up, as you shot him a quick, polite smile, but he couldn't find it in himself to smile back unless he just wouldn't stop smiling, so he nodded, taking the money and looking away. Your smile faded with a sigh released from your lips.
You hurriedly walked away, trying to calm yourself while you looked up, but also paid attention to not fall, ruin something, feel more embarrassed which would make you cry. Your feet all the same began hurrying, holding the cloth bag under your arm of fish. While walking, you kicked a stone, rolling it ahead as you strolled, wondering why Gwan-sik seemed to, for the lack of a better word, hate you. You never acted rudely, did you?
You hoped not, you could have been a possibly annoying or bully-ish child. But you figured your grandpa wouldn't let that slide, he said 'a kindness is what brings us to our community and what keeps us human'. And you'd be stupid to not listen to him.
As you gently walked over the one fallen side of the wooden gate which was junked and rusted in place for god knows how many decades. A lot of houses in Dodong-rii have similar gateways. As you entered, you quickly removed your shoes, standing up and getting inside the house—
"Hal-abeoji! I'm home, got the fish!" you said, hurrying in with embarrassed still set like stone in a pit in your gut. Gwan-sik. Does he even know who you are? Most people knew each other in Dodong-rii, but...He clearly didn't seem to like you, at all.
"Ho? That's good. I made jujube tea." Your grandfather said, barely looking up from his glasses and news channel, sitting on the floor, peeling quail eggs for more of your favourite banchan, machorial jangjorim.
You put down the bag of fish and seafood in-front of him, sighing softly. you looked at the screen for a second, watching some news anchor drone on about 'life of people changing' as it usually does every few months. Your grandpa finally looked up,
"What's wrong, girl-ah? Dragon King hit you or something?" he asked softly, pausing his peeling. You shut your eyes, squeezing them to gather your bearings for a second. "Nothing, just.. something you wouldn't understand." you said, waving your grandpa off with a wave of your hand. Your grandfather scoffed, not amused but also not surprised or annoyed by your answer.
He expected it, almost. But sometimes you tend to forget, he was a guy who also was your age once, who had dated girls and fallen first to impress them and knew the face one has in humiliation of wrong understandings when he sees it,
"Yeah? And where'd you fall? In a pile of pig poo?" he asked, pushing up his glasses on his nose-bridge with her pinkie to keep his lenses clean.
"No.. Nothing—actually, we shouldn't be talking about this! Because it's nothing!" You insisted, "Nothing at all." you said, thought you didn't believe yourself either.
"Mhm, okay—"
"FINE. SINCE YOU KEEP INSISTING!" You said, sitting down while your grandpa sighed, but smiled fondly at you. You grumbled, looking down at the bag and the money in your hand, "I thought this..person at-least knew me or liked him, turns out this person doesn't even care. I bet they hate me.." your voice came out meek and embarrassingly desperate, in your ears.
"Ah, and you feel embarrassed? Well, girl. I'm not surprised this person doesn't know you since you don't even know their gender," your grandpa said in an unimpressed tone, "Hah Yang Gwan-sik. Maybe he does care. He just—he doesn't know how to act. His halmeoni and eomma, both act like witches. His appa, he couldn't care less."
You winced when your hal-abeoji spoke his name. You weren't surprised your grandpa knew you so well, you and him spent majority of your time together. He took you to school and he used to bring you back until you were old enough to return home alone. He made your favourite foods, told stories of his love-story with your halmeoni.
He was your best-friend. In every way one could be a best-friend.
After a bit of silence, just sound of egg shell cracking and smell of soy-sauce and garlic and eggs stood around you. Your grandfather's voice cracked again over the news anchor, "Aiyah, go. Go walk or something, it's time for my show. You'll just blabber around." Your grandpa said, shooing you away.
You knew what he was trying to do, and you knew you needed to get out and maybe move on to get fresh air. You sighed, pulling your shoes on and hurried out. Your feet carrying you further away, outside your fresh house. You sighed, kicking stones as you walked lazily, hands clasped behind you. The sky was filled with clouds, it was snowing, barely, but snowing all the same. A very thin, nonuniform sheen of snow covered the stones and ground.
As you walked, you heard a few murmurs, "Government isn't going to take responsibility for punks and athletes. What is this nonsense?" You heard a girl asked with a laughing scoff, "You don't think the poem's nice? Rich girls have better things. It needs to be good." A voice, you knew so well. The same voice which roamed your mind was in your head..That was Gwan-sik's voice.
Hearing the voice, you softly decided to walk ahead, your foot took a step. But when it did, you hear a soft crunch. You'd definitely be heard. Knowing that, you bent down, pulling your shoes off and trying to calm yourself as your feet settled on the cold cobblestone layered with a in-uniform layer of snow. The cold piercing deeper than you expected it to.
But despite it, you and your feet moving before your brain could ask them not to. Following your heart to walk closer to the man you're in love with, even if he hates you. You held your shoes in one hand, taking careful steps as if trying to not make sounds despite the cold bleeding into the skin of your bare feet. Trying to follow the voice, you found yourself walking close to Dodong-rii pavilion.
As you gently peeked over, you found Ae-sun and Gwan-sik sitting on the steps of the entrance. Ae-sun holding a paper in her hands while Gwan-sik sat, a worried look on his face. Was he in trouble? Ae-sun didn't seem so impressed by whatever was on the paper, as her eyes scanned it. Gwan-sik again looked at her, the back of his head even radiated concern and nervousness.
"What's wrong? The poem can't be that bad, right?" he said softly, "It's not...bad—" Ae-sun tried to soften the blow, "It's just..Whatever." she said, folding the paper. Her eyes scanned the area a bit as if looking for a change in topic. You swore her eyes hit on you, but she didn't say anything nor did she react, so you hoped she didn't see you spying.
"You're going to just hand her the poem? That's what you're planning?" Ae-sun asked softly, eyes round and curious. Gwan-sik hummed, "They come to you every week and you hand them over to your halmeoni or eomma. I bet they hate you" Ae-sun snorted playfully.
"They're from a rich family, her hal-abeoji own a few boats and they're quite good. I can't play prince..." he said, voice slightly hoarse and cracky.
You paused, blinking a bit, your heart sinking to your stomach. Was he going to confess to a girl he liked?
"But they visit the market every week, you don't even bother helping her." Ae-sun pointed out. Gwan-sik sighed again, shaky and breathing out fog. You switched weight from one foot to another, the cold biting at your feet, you swore you'd gotten a frostbite. "Why? Why!? Do you like driving them away, you punk?" she asked, gently nudging him with her foot.
Gwan-sik didn't say anything, "You like them, right? You have to act like it. You have to be romantic, like a novel hero!" Ae-sun insisted, her voice loud and motivating Gwan-sik. "I'll write a poem to her on your behalf, but you gotta be nice to Y/N, you hear me? Otherwise Dragon King will eat you!" she said, as you froze in your spot..
Were they talking about you? Gwan-sik liked you? Oh, that's perfect! But if he likes you, then why did he act so..? So unapproachable, like he was irritated by your presence or perhaps bothered..
"Do you just know how to run your mouth?" Gwan-sik spoke up, even if his voice was fond, "It's embarrassing, to be with a fishmonger's son when they're rich. Why don't you fix the status first?" Gwan-sik said. Ae-sun snorted softly, folding the paper in pristine folds to attempt to make a swan.
"Why don't you ask them if it bothers you?" she said. Gwan-sik kept quiet, he always did. He was more of a listener, his responses came rarely, but when they did, they had power, "They LOVE you. Don't you see? You're starting to go blind too?" Ae-sun hummed.
"I'll stay blind as long as I don't have to see them loving someone else. I don't want to stand in their way." Gwan-sik said. "They're standing right there, why don't you get an answer?" Ae-sun said, nodding to where you were.
You froze, the cold became colder and it felt freezing as you hurriedly put on your shoes, stepping infront of them. Gwan-sik hurriedly stood up and stood straight, completely frozen, "Did you hear it all?"
"I made sure they'll hear it all. You act like a hero in pain." Ae-sun said, getting up and sighing in relief as if she got a workout done, handing Gwan-sik his poem back, "I'll head home first, see you~" she said in a chirrupy voice, waving to you as she walked off.
You turned to him, as he cleared his throat. "You look cold, were you standing there barefoot for so long?" he asked, worriedly. Offering you chicken skewer he got, but you stood frozen.
"I thought you hated me..Why..?" you asked, confused. Not hurt, no..You were bursting with excitement, but it was so overwhelming, it just wasn't coming up to the surface, pressure building in your gut. His hand gently held yours, pulling them up and handing the chicken skewer to you, to hopefully warm you up in any measly way he could.
"I didn't hate you. Talking to you is tough, my voice gets stuck in my throat like a fool's." Gwan-sik said as you scoffed a little, "Is it that tough? It's tough looking at you! You're... good-looking." you said, voice shy but with assurance. Pressure getting stronger and stronger..
"You could have talked to me. I wouldn't bite you or eat you. I'm just from a rich family, not from Dragon King's death servants." You whispered, "You really like me?" He asked, voice shaky. You took a bite of the chicken, it was nice. Salty.
"For few months now" You nodded, looking upto meet his eyes. His round eyes stared into yours, lovingly if hoping this wasn't some joke Ae-sun built up. You glanced down at his lips. Gwan-sik breathed in and out to calm his nerves, gently reaching out, but his hand paused midway and he pulled his hand back.
You don't know why fate was testing you and why destiny was being troublesome and crackling between you in the moment. The pressure was building more, it was threatening to burst out, as you tried to not smile like a kid, that would be kinda embarrassing, no?
you two could barely look each other in the eye, continuously glancing down or around. Eyes flitting for some way to fill the awkward silence and gap. The pressure of giddiness and happiness that feelings were reciprocated, despite the brash behavior was building more.
Till it broke, you and him could barely keep it together. But, it didn't matter much when the pressure burst out, both of you leaning close. The distance closed in abrupt manner to press your lips in a kiss. Gwan-sik's hands clenching by his side, nails digging in his palm so he wouldn't touch you.
Your hand very hesitantly touching the edge of his pocket, barely noticeable, fingers tightening till they were white around his maroon practice jacket. Kiss stiff, sloppy but filled with so much love..
You knew your eyes told everyone you met that you adored Gwan-sik; your grandpa, Ae-sun, perhaps even his own halmeoni with the way she stared sometimes when you visited their shop.
Gwan-sik's eyes all the while never left you, his eyes showed and told you that he wasn't letting go. Not now..Not when he hopefully had you for him. All for him.
Lip trembling, your gaze went upwards. Locking with his. Eyes stinging from the tears. Hands trembling as they clutched hard around the metal. Grip tightened as streams of red found ways through your fingers. Droplets of red dropping to the ground. A moment of clarity.
Withholding your sobs, your lip trembled even more. His gaze with surprise on you. Breath shuddering as his hands were wrapped tight around the handle. – “P…pl…please…” – you sputtered out, eyes closing as tears rolled down. Deepening in your skin like a river making a path downwards.
“I…I…I…I will not… I...” – he responded. Opening your eyes once more, you took a breath. – “Saranghaeyo.” – were your last words. Letting go of the sword’s edge, you took a step forwards. Knowing he would never have the strength to do it, but he needed to. The sword pierced through your body, releasing all air out of you. A silent gasp emerging out of you. Settling in on the pain.
Head feeling weightless, leaning to the side. He pulled the sword out of you, casting it aside. Knees giving away, you sunk down. His arms catching you, holding you on his lap. – “No… please…” – he sputtered out, vision blurring with tears. Your hand slowly reaching up, touching just his chin with your finger.
Leaving a small mark of blood there before you lost all strength in it. He took your falling hand, holding it and cherishing it against his chest. Rocking you gently back and forth. Sobbing quietly, breath shocking. Grief settling in his heart. Pressing his hand against your wound, his hand soaked with blood. Yours.
Sucking in a deep breath, he screamed it out. The mountains shaking under his grieving heart. Having lost the love of his life, Lee Yeon only had one wish. One wish he would see final no matter the cost. He would bring back his love, to be reunited.
Hundreds of years later his wish finally came to play. Having found his lost love. Still the same, yet carrying another name in this era. At first he thought his eyes were deceiving him when he noticed you. Wondering if the Gods were playing tricks on him. They were not. The yearning in his heart grew yet so did his guilt. Seeing you again, reminded him once again of his act.
There was no other choice, yet it were his hands that cut your life-cord short. The cord between love and faith snapped in two. The guilt became overwhelming he barely dared to approach you. Yet when his memories of you resurrected, he reminded himself of his promise. His wish. Sacrificing his entire being just for you. He had to struggle through rough paths and thick terrain to reach you.
It became pretty clear to him you were not the same person that he knew. Different. No memory of before. At first he felt betrayed. Played and mocked. Wanting nothing more than to be as far away from you. For in his mind you were not her. You were not the woman he loved before. You may wear the same face, but you were nothing alike. He was at the brink of leaving for good.
Never having to be reminded of you again. Yet when the moment arrived, he couldn’t. Seeing you hang around some of your male co-workers made his blood boil. Unleashed a fire within him that was green with jealousy. He couldn’t go away, not while his wish had been granted. Slowly his heart started to yearn for you once more. Fully clasping around you when he saved you that faithful night.
It was raining, pouring. Lee Yeon had been waiting outside of your apartment. Watching, taking shelter under the red umbrella. He blinked surprised when he saw you come down. Hurry through the rain towards your car and got in. Watching you drive off. Wondering what drove you to go ride in the rain was a mystery to him.
Without a second thought, he followed you. Relieved he did for a few blocks away, the car started to slip. The road being too slippery. Another car, driver’s eyes glued to their phone made you swerve the car out of the way. Losing control over your steering. Tires slipping as your car got caught by the railing. Lee Yeon hurried over to the crashed car. – “Y/n.” – he panted out, looking through the window at you. Seeing you lay unconscious, some blood on your forehead.
With his strength, he pulled the car door open. Your body falling to the side as he caught it. Taking off your seatbelt, he moved his arms underneath you. Carrying you out. Getting soaking wet, yet caring little for it. He carried you all the way home. Remaining by your side. When you woke up, you were startled at first. Then grateful for his intervention. For the mysterious Lee Yeon didn’t felt so mysterious anymore.
After that he started to spend more time with you. His heart fully bound to you. A cord no one could cut. A string of faith connecting him with you. After a while it felt familiar at his side. Something about him, felt right. Like you had known him for eons, but couldn’t quite figure it out.
After another while when your heart was yearning for him as well, you learned the truth. The truth about your former life. A past life that had shared a life with Lee Yeon. Knowing about it, clouded your visions a bit. For it bubbled up a feeling inside of you, you hadn’t anticipated.
Sighing soft, your gaze went up to your phone laying before you. A message popping up from Lee Yeon. You let the screen go dark once more. Pressing your hands between your thighs. Head lowering, you felt a bit guilty. Guilty for you had been ignoring his texts almost the entire day.
Unable to keep the knowledge of your past life out of your head. It brooded there and nestled till it was buried deep enough to make you question everything. What you had with him now was it real? Is he still clinging onto her image? Is his love true or does he only love your past self and the same face you carry?
All those questions haunted you. Making you lose your damn mind over it. Groaning loud, you pressed your hands against your forehead. – “Perhaps it was better if I didn’t know.” – whispering to yourself. Rubbing your face against your palms, you wiped away any traces of tears before they could settle.
Your phone vibrated again, another message added to the already piling up. Exhaling loud, you couldn’t bare yourself to reply him. Not sure if you would be able to control yourself. To not lash out to him for your own feelings of jealousy for a long lost girl. Spiralling down your own self-pity. Falling only deeper.
You barely flinched when the door opened. Knowing exactly who it was. Hearing him take of his shoes and put on some in-door slippers. – “Y/n is your battery dead?” – he asked entering the apartment more. Setting the plastic bag aside on the table before coming to you.
Coming around the sofa to come and sit with you. He leaned in wanting to kiss you. Unwillingly you turned your cheek to him. Making him hesitate for a second before leaving a soft kiss on your cheek. His gaze falling on your phone, he plucked it up. – “Did you not get any of my messages?” – he questioned, tapping your phone so the screen lit up.
His smile dropping at the sight of your battery being just fine and the pile of his unread messages. Trying to not let it get to his heart, he placed your phone back down. – “Is… is everything alright Y/n?” – he asked placing a hand on your knee.
Taking a breath, you moved your knee away so that his hand slipped off. Lee Yeon’s brows furrowed not understanding where your sudden behaviour came from. His eyes suddenly widened, thinking of something. Grabbing you by your face, he turned your head at him. Gaze darting over your face for any signs. – “What are you doing?” – you called out, moving the back of your hands up to make him release his grip on you.
He kept checking you, every inch of your face to see if you hadn’t been effected by something. – “Stop it!” – you shouted, pulling his hands down. Turning your posture away from him. Lee Yeon stared a bit shocked back at you. – “Did something happen Y/n? Why are you suddenly so…” – he kept the rest of his words inwards. Not wanting to say out loud… cold.
Feeling your eyes swell, you immediately looked away. Pressing your lips a bit together to settle the feeling down. A slight soreness settling in your throat. Knowing if you didn’t swallow now, the lump would find ground there. – “Y/n?” – Lee Yeon repeated wanting to hear from you. Closing your eyes, you couldn’t hold it in anymore.
Saying the name of your previous life out loud. Lee Yeon’s eyes widened. Repeating it slow. – “That is who I remind you off each time you see me.” – continuing for you didn’t want to keep it to yourself anymore. – “Am I wrong?” – Pressing your fist on your knee, staring harshly back at him.
Lee Yeon slightly lowered his head. – “You are not.” – answering. Making you look away again to keep the tears at bay. Not wanting to cry in his presence. – “But that is not the point Y/n.” – he spoke further. – “Yes it is!” – snapping at him. Losing your temper for a moment. – “That is exactly the entire point, Lee Yeon.” – you explained to him.
“How… how can you… you keep clinging to the past. To a person I am not. It Is not fair towards me.” – you told him. – “You spend a life before with her… how are the new memories any different. They are nothing compared to hers.” – staring in front of you, eyes swelled up once more. – “Is… is that what you fear?” – Lee Yeon began.
“That I only cling to you for an old memory?” – finishing as you slowly nodded. Lee Yeon placed his hand on your knee once more. – “I loved her once, I cannot deny that.” – he spoke as it made you look away. Taking you by the chin, he wanted you to look at him.
“But I do not compare you to her… not anymore.” – seeing you look away, eyes glossing with bubbling tears. – “Her life was ended. Yours is still blooming. Y/n I do not wish for a life with her, but for a life with you. I cannot erase her existence from my memory, but I can fill my heart with yours.”
Brushing his thumb against your cheek, he caught one of your tears. – “Let me say this to you, what I never could say to her.” – his voice husky, hand gliding down your cheek. – “ Saranghae.”– with wonder you stared back at him. Leaning forwards as his hand moved behind your head. Guiding you towards him. Settling his lips to yours. Gentle and caring. Making you grasp for his shirt, you deepened the kiss. His other hand joining on your back. Thinking of you and only you.
