#kellan oliver

[honey-and-sting]

My Distant Star

The mere thought of you shimmers. It immerses the velvet night  with striking beauty

& I can’t help but be filled with this longing, this melancholic desire to have you near me. I want to feel your body against mine.

The sky feels infinite, the distance between us boundless, but I have so many things I want to say to you & so many kisses held in my lips.

Can you come shine closer, my distant star?

[honey-and-sting]

Trust

& what is trust but the insane desire to believe that the person you love owns no knives.

[honey-and-sting]

Lost Words

I am in tears over the loss of a few words that no one would have read anyway- a collection of stars that are entirely pointless, a futile effort at being known.

So I spend Valentines Day at my desk  surrounded by notebooks as I type-type-type away, denying the cat attention & occasionally looking out the window to see the snow coming down in little fluffs.

What’s the point of writing any of this anyway?

[honey-and-sting]

Lonely Haiku

I tell myself I don’t mind being alone, but I tell myself lies.

[honey-and-sting]

Valentine’s Day Snow

Snow, come down-

come down & blanket everything. Hide me away in the luscious cold numbness.

Bury me in the deepest sleep. I’m so weary, so starved for rest after struggling for so long to be better than I am.

Snow, come cover me.

[honey-and-sting]

Cosmia #1

(A magnetic poem)

My darling- evening is coming near & away from the sleeping sun. This quiet moonlight sets our hearts off like little wings. You can come rest by me.

[honey-and-sting]

Acceptance

It’s uncomfortable- the sadness that swells up in your chest, the fear that paralyzes you, & the anger, oh the anger.

It’s hard to sit with, hard to accept that it’s part of you,

but that’s exactly what you need to do.

Feel what you need to feel & let it go.

[honey-and-sting]

Aloneness

I’ve spent so much time laying in the dark of my depression, alone without a chance of not-aloneness. Please forgive me. I have forgotten the words for “hello”, for “I miss you”,  for “Please come hold me, I don’t feel like myself anymore.”