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Here I am again... crying because of this heart break. Combo hit kasi e, I lost someone whom I thought na may something pala kami pero wala pala. And at the same time, lost a friend... not just a friend but a special friend kasi maganda 'yung history namin kasi we already knew each other since maliliit pa kami.
Finally, I had a proper closure. I spoke to him well because I don't want to leave bitter words. I don't want him to remember na pangit 'yung huling pag-uusap namin. Ang sakit. Sobrang masakit. I know, makaka move on lang din ako sa pangyayaring 'to. Pero I'm afraid na hindi na mababalik 'yung dating kami; yung friendship namin. I wish you the best, Helg. Take good care of yourself. It's just sad to see that we've drifted apart... I'm still thankful that you made me once happy. (Though hindi pala totoo 'yun lahat) At least... Bye.
Pero I know hating you won't make things better. So I guess I'll just forget everything about you and move on. I just wish that one day, you'll look back and realize what you've done. I didn't do anything to hurt you that's why I'm here wondering. God bless you, Helg. I hope you're always safe.
Kailan bang naging tama ang pag-iwan ng tao sa ere?
Akala ko ba 'di ka tulad ng ibang lalaki? Sinunggaling ka rin pala. Alam ko wala akong karapatan. Pero just for the sake of our friendship, sana naging honest ka nalang, Helgen. Siguro kung naging honest ka lang, hindi siguro ako magagalit sa'yo ngayon. Dahil sa ginawa mo, parang sinabi mo na rin sa'kin na you don't value our friendship. Remember? You said na importante ako sa'yo? Saan na 'yun?
I wasn't expecting for a relationship, helg. I really don't. Kasi sabi mo bawal, and sa lagay ko ngayon, i'm not yet ready. Dun pa lang ipinaubaya ko na sa tadhana kung ano ang mangyayari. Alam mo sobrang laki ng faith ko sa'yo kasi nga, you're far away from me. I trusted you. Ipinagpatuloy ko 'yung feelings ko kasi I hope that things will get better for us.
I'm very disappointed with you. Umabot sa point na pinagsisisihan ko kung ba't ko pa sinabi sa'yo 'yung feelings ko. Sana hindi nalang tayo nagkita. Sana hindi nalang bumalik 'yung communication. You played with my feelings, helg. And sobrang sakit kasi iniwan mo'ko sa ere ng walang ka alam alam. I trusted you with my feelings kasi I thought you're gonna be extra careful with it kasi we're friends. But look at you? You're worse than a stranger breaking someone's heart on purpose.
All I can feel now is pure hatred and pain. I never imagined this will happen because I always hope for the best of us. Helg, you never valued me. Kahit as a friend siguro hindi... I'm sorry but as of this moment, I don't want to be friends with you. I'm so mad at you and it's very painful because I can't stand being mad on someone who's dear to my heart. I'm fighting with my feelings right now. I want to forget that I had feelings for you. I want to hate you.
I'm sorry for burdening you with my feelings. I hope you find someone that understands you more than I do.