#kiko rants

[siriuslysatorusimping]

I’ve seen so many posts about nerd Gojo lately and how shy and reserved he would be and it irritates me that people are completely ignoring the fact that CANON GOJO IS LITERALLY ALREADY A NERD. ‘NERD GOJO’ IS JUST GOJO. ARROGANT, BLUNT, A BIT OF AN ASS, BUT CARING, AND ATTENTIVE, AND OBLIVIOUS BECAUSE HE’S ALSO SO DAMN AUTISTIC THAT IT HURTS.

CANON GOJO IS AN AUTISTIC/NEURODIVERGENT NERD AND I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL.

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk.

[kikhoe]

...

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Hi I’m dropping in to provide a fun fact that high school in Japan is three years, not four.

Elementary is six years. Lower secondary, or middle school, is three (7th-9th grade). Upper secondary, or high school, is another three (10th-12th grade equivalent).

So when manga or anime talk about someone being a third year in high school, they are in their final year of primary school. There isn’t a fourth year. Their school year also starts in April.

Oh, they also don’t have american football. And they don’t call soccer football, they just call it soccer.

This has been another fun kiko rant about accuracy in fanfic.

[siriuslysatorusimping]

MERRY CHRISTMAS & MAJOR Kiko Update

(new illustration by Hiramatsu Tadashi, one of the character designers for JJK!)

Kiko update below the cut 💕

After more than a year of being unemployed, I finally got a full-time job! I'm scheduled to start in January, so I’ll be moving in the next couple of weeks. I’m super excited for this fresh start.

I wanted to thank everyone in our lil corner for your continued support and kind messages. You guys kept me going through some pretty hopeless times, even though I wasn't around very much. Seeing returning and new readers expressing love for Goinko, and specifically Rinko, brought me so much joy when I needed it most.

After I start my new job and settle into a bit of a stable routine, I plan to get back to writing! I'll also try to keep the SVE streams going because I've been having so much fun with them. PLUS, Goinko still have to get MARRIED 😏 But marriage is still only a new beginning for our lovable idiots!

Some things to look forward to in 2026:

Gokudō

I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again: I will finish Gokudō! My plans for its direction have changed drastically since I started, but I think you guys will like it. I'm excited to get back into the story, and to share it with you eventually!

Physical Paradox

I had an epiphany for PhysPara Gojo not long ago and briefly discussed it on stream, so I'm planning to get back into it next year!

Another Level: From Now Until Forever

There is SO MUCH story left for our OG Goinko, and I can’t wait to share with you guys 😊

Before I Love You

I know it was originally a one-shot, but we’ve obviously gone past that lol I have a part three in the works that I'm going to finish now that I’m not constantly anxious about being evicted 🙃

Bittersweet Memories, Locked Out, and more

I haven’t forgotten these works! I’ll continue working on these, and it’s possible that one or more might become Patreon exclusives once I finish them!

ANYWAY~ Thank you guys again for being part of our lil corner of the internet and for your kind messages and words! I haven't forgotten you, and I appreciate you more than words can express! For those who celebrate, HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS! And I'll see you guys soon! (maybe for a Christmas Goinko Stream 🤔)

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Meaningless vs. useful angst

Kiko is about to fucking rant.

Maybe I'm beating a dead horse, but I feel like this is something that people will relate to more than I realized before. Plus, as someone who is going through a lot of shit IRL, I completely understand the need to read some angst as an outlet. But the constant angst caused purely by the exact same issues over and over and over with zero growth over 100k+ word fics gets incredibly exhausting and sometimes it genuinely ruins my day because the angst didn't serve as a useful outlet; in the end, it actually just filled me with more grief.

In my (likely unpopular) opinion, these stories show a lack of depth and creativity in a writer. They give the impression that the writer doesn't know how to write conflict without falling back onto the exact same issues and tropes, and it just becomes a revolving door that will never have a satisfying end.

Meaningless angst leaves readers unsatisfied and empty. It provides characters that readers don't want to root for. It lacks proper character development and typically includes angst for the sake of angst, for the sake of piling the pain and anguish onto characters (and readers) until it's just more than anyone can take. It reaches a point where absolutely no ending will be satisfying for anyone. Eventually, characters are irredeemable and beyond saving.

Making your readers feel grief through your writing does not make you a good writer by default. Sometimes, it just means that you've written a shit ton of angst with no clear direction and it left your readers feeling unfulfilled and empty. Angst with no purpose beyond drawing a reaction from people isn't good writing, it's lazy and uncreative. Most of the time, it's used as a means to keep people hooked because they're compelled to read until there's a satisfying end, but the problem is that there won't be. Essentially, what you've done is you've opened a wound that will never be closed.

For angst to work, there has to be a clear goal and characters worth rooting for. We want them to make it through the angst because they're strong and compelling. But once you have characters making the exact same mistakes for the fifth or sixth time with no signs of growth or any attempts to learn, it becomes drawn out and meaningless. The issue with this kind of angst is that it doesn't drive us forward, it either takes us backward or keeps us stagnant. It leaves your readers unsatisfied, and it traps you in a cycle that feels absolutely hopeless. We start just wishing for the end no matter what that may be. We don't want them to keep going.

The purpose of angst is not just to cause pain. Angst is a rhetorical vehicle to reach a clear goal. Angst works when it has purpose beyond evoking strong reactions from readers. It works when it's necessary to move the story forward.

These are all reasons why, in my writing (Another Level, Physical Paradox, and even in Before I Love You), I've tried to make sure that angst has a clear meaning and purpose. In Another Level, our angst didn't last too long. It wasn't drawn out for no reason, and it had a clear result. Every time we had angst, we clearly saw the growth in Rinko and Gojo. In the end, it always worked toward strengthening their trust, not completely destroying it. The angst began because of 'realistic' reasons, not cheap plot twists that make you angry and leave you unfulfilled (I hope).

Anyway, that's my rant about angst because it seems like there are no stories that can balance the angst well enough to reach a satisfying conclusion.

[siriuslysatorusimping]

It makes my blood boil when people use U.S. currency when they write about JJK because they’re LITERALLY IN JAPAN. IT’S YEN. THEY USE YEN. IT’S NOT DOLLARS. THEY DO NOT USE U.S. CURRENCY.

IT’S SO EASY TO CONVERT, TOO. IT’S ESSENTIALLY 1 USD = 100 YEN.

“We’re in Tokyo and I got this in Shibuya and it cost me 100 dollars!” NO. IT COST YOU 10,000 YEN. STOP IT.

PLEASE. STOP. U.S.-IFYING EVERYTHING.

THE WORLD. DOES NOT. REVOLVE AROUND. US. OTHER COUNTRIES HAVE DIFFERENT CURRENCY AND SYSTEMS AND WAYS OF LIVING. IT IS SO ANNOYING AND IT RUINS IMMERSION.

LITTLE. DETAILS. MATTER.

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Happy New Year everyone 🎉🎊

There’s still about three hours till midnight here in Texas, but I wanted to share a lil recap of my past two years in pixels. My therapist recommended this app to me five years ago, and I’ve been using it ever since. I actually prefer journaling in my physical journal over digitally, so I don’t really use the app to journal so much as a mood tracker and partial habit tracker. But I noted an upward trend earlier this year, and it still ended with a better average mood than 2023 despite the last three months being a complete shitshow. I had almost 10x more great days in 2024 than 2023, more good than neutral or bad, and I halved the number of horrible days. I hope to have even more great days that leave me feeling fulfilled and hopeful in 2025.

It’s been quite a year for me. I got a new job, got divorced, lost the new job, and then I moved.

I know I’ve said it a lot lately, but this lil corner has saved me so many times. You guys have been wonderful and I love this corner we’ve carved for ourselves so much.

Some of my goals for 2025 are:

get back into writing (might even set a daily word count goal)

find a full time job

spend more time with my family

start learning how to live life beyond being in constant survival mode

visit my best friend and meet her child.

(be more active on Patreon)

I’d love to hear from you guys if you’re comfortable sharing your 2025 goals or highlights from this year or any updates you wanna give!!

- Kiko 💕

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Merry Christmas! And a lil update from Kiko

Hi. I just needed to get some things out and I’m honestly not sure if I’ll even post this after I finish typing it.

I hope everyone is doing well and having a restful holiday with their families. I’m grateful for everyone here in our lil corner, and wish you all a very Merry Christmas and am looking forward to what 2025(that’s insane to type) brings all of us! (Especially more Goinko 👀)

My update below the cut.

I finished moving today. Finished moving out of a house that, when I moved into it, I thought it would help improve my marriage that was already failing. I thought the things that were happening around us in our old apartment were the catalyst for our arguments and constant fighting, for his refusal to try marriage counseling. I thought that our apartment flooding and the black mold growing in the corners were what caused so much discontent and anger. I thought my boss constantly yelling at me was the reason I was exhausted and unable to handle my husband’s constant criticism and arguing when I got home. But those were only small factors that piled on top of larger issues that lay beneath two incompatible people, one of which was reaching her absolute limit with existing because she was constantly told that any version of who she really was was hard to love and impossible to like.

When we moved into that house, we were so excited. I was so excited for the new possibilities. Then we adopted Atlas and I really thought things could only go up. I was wrong.

I’ve been working on getting things moved over the past month, emptying out the three bedroom house and moving into a one bedroom apartment. I had to figure out how to try to pay rent on unemployment that was only a fraction of what the expenses were, and ended up having to deal with my ex-husband’s condescending accusations that my lack of savings and inability to pay the rent was due to my own shortcomings and not the lack of a job, or the fact that my entire life’s savings disappeared and never returned not long after we got married. I had to deal with him treating me like a stupid teenager who got in over their head when I didn’t get to up and leave all of my rental problems behind for him to fix. I had to fix the broken light switches and stained walls and carpets from his tantrums when he would throw and kick things in my direction but never directly at me so that he could still brag that he’d never hit me. He left within six days of me finally admitting I wanted a divorce, after he forced it out of me by threatening with it like he always did. He up and left, took Atlas without letting me say goodbye, and left everything he didn’t want for me to deal with and try to figure out how to get rid of or sell. Half-finished DIY projects and an electric lawn mower with no battery because he took that to be spiteful.

The past month has been a constant go-go-go while I worked part time, applied for jobs, and cleaned out the house as best I could while living with the constant dread of what I’m going to do once unemployment runs out. It may seem like nothing to some, but I’ve been at my limit all year and I’ve been running on empty for at least the past two years.

I felt a whirlwind of emotions today as I stood in the doorway and stared at the empty house, wiped clean of the evidence that I ever lived there. That the space once held all my hope that if I could just do better, my marriage would be fine, now empty and perfectly spotless thanks to the cleaners who did an incredible job. With the scent of cleaning products and carpet shampoo in the air, it all hit me at once that even though I’ve spent the past month cursing everything to do with that house and saying I wanted nothing more than to be done, I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want to leave it behind because it was the last connection I had to the illusion of happiness I’d clung to for so long. A happiness that never truly existed in the first place. Instead of spending Christmas Eve with family, I was finishing up leaving behind a place I’d called home and genuinely loved so much when I moved in. I spent Christmas Eve alone, sobbing as I tried to come to terms with the fact that I felt so unbelievably sad for reasons I couldn’t begin to understand or explain. I don’t miss him. I don’t miss how he treated me or looked at me or spoke to me. I don’t want him back in my life in any way, so why did I feel so damn sad and reluctant to close that front door a final time?

There’s also the anger and bitterness that’s really begun to creep up lately. The rage that burns my chest at the fact that he gets to pretend he did nothing wrong and still treat me like it was all my fault. When he claims he couldn’t pay rent for a place he signed a contract for while he still has a full time job and a $6,000+ bonus coming in a week, while I scrape by on unemployment and still manage to make ends meet after being left with thousands in debt and no savings from the divorce.

Today was me closing out a chapter of my life that there was a time I never thought would come to an end. Officially leaving behind the last thing that truly tied me to my ex husband in any way. I won’t get my full deposit back because there was too much for me to do alone, and I didn’t have any type of energy left to keep working on it. But it’s done. I’ll have more time now to focus on something other than moving, which means I’ll be working and applying for jobs, but also trying to get back into writing more regularly again.

I’ll be around a bit for the holidays because I have a few days off. But like I said before, I hope everyone is resting and having a wonderful time with their families or whatever they’re spending their time doing!

This lil corner has been one of the few positive things in my life, something I never thought would come of my random Gojo brain worm almost two years ago. Thank you all again for the support and love you’ve given this year. I’m really excited for what next year will bring. (Like maybe a short tattoo au one shot)

- Kiko 💕