#killerboredom

[thesmileclown]

@killer-boredom         

Sam paused, pressing his tongue to the roof of his mouth and wrinkling his nose a moment as he thought. Not because he didn’t know the answer to the question but more because of the question itself. They didn’t often ask each other personal questions, so this felt more than a little from left field. “Nah, never,” the man replied, leaning against the newly installed kitchen counters. “Why? Not gettin’ any ideas now are ya, kiddo?”

Dandy rolled his eyes. “Oh yes, I’m hoping you’ll take me right atop the polished granite for the whole set to see. Hope they get it on camera.” He licked his lips salaciously for effect. It would be a little more complicated to explain why exactly he did want to know. That he was curious about Sam as, like, a person or something. Eww. Gross. “Just testing a theory, is all. You seem like a pretty conservative guy. I had to wonder if the wholesomness was a front and you were really a secret freak or something like that.”

"Wise-ass," Sam retorted dryly, not ready to give Dandy a pass on being...well, just being weird. He also wasn't ready to mention that for a fleeting moment that thought had crossed his mind, but there was something satisfying in knowing Dandy had thought it too. Even if just as a joke. "I'm plenty wholesome," he continued, pushing himself up a bit to rest on hand flat against the counter. "But I'm not so sure about conservative...eh, I'm sure ya don't care much about that. I've only ever seen you care about wall colors and uh...what do you call it...your aesthetic vision or whatever."

[thesmileclown]

@killer-boredom

[TEXT: 💜  Pretty Boyfren 💜 ] Did you just send me nudes….from the other room?? [TEXT: 💜  Pretty Boyfren 💜 ] I’m sitting on the couch. I’m 10 ft away ????? [TEXT: 💜  Pretty Boyfren 💜 ] Please come and be nakey in the living room

[TEXT: ❣️Burrfriend❣️] Can’t, too lazy. [TEXT: ❣️Burrfriend❣️] Why don’t you come find me. [TEXT: ❣️Burrfriend❣️] We can be nakey together

[TEXT: 💜  Pretty Boyfren 💜 ] You are the most laziest ever [TEXT: 💜  Pretty Boyfren 💜 ]  You’re lucky you’re cute, but not that lucky [TEXT: 💜  Pretty Boyfren 💜 ] Get out here and show your pretty self off [TEXT: 💜  Pretty Boyfren 💜 ] Then we can get good and nakey <3

[thesmileclown]

“Merry Christmas, Sam,” Dandy said, kissing his boyfriend in greeting. “I’m making waffles. They seem like a Christmassy breakfast.”

@killer-boredom

          Sleep still hung onto him, his eyelids droopy as he made his way into the kitchen, shuffling a bit more than he was walking. The small of something cooking had roused him from slumber. He came up behind Dandy, lightly placing a hand on the small of the other’s back. The kiss was a warm and welcome sensation, bringing a smile onto his lips as he returned it. “Merry Christmas to you too…” he replied softly, wrapping his arms around Dandy’s waist lightly, doing his best to not be in the way…well, not too much anyway. “Smells real good. Enough to wake your snoozy pet bear…” he added with a yawn as he rested his cheek on top of Dandy’s head.

[thesmileclown]

@killer-boredom

“That’s a relief,“ he replied, a cautious but flattered tilt to his voice. “I was starting to think you were just sucking my dick out of spite or something…”

“Maybe at the beginning,” Dandy replied, looking determinedly at his cuticles. “Were you not impressed? It probably wasn’t my best work.”

“No, no...you were good. You continue to be good, just...” Sam paused, wondering for a moment if he was ruining the moment. Well, what was left of it. “You just never seemed that fond of me outside of that. That’s all.”

[thesmileclown]

@killer-boredom​

          Sam looked down at the address on his phone as he stepped out of the elevator, tensing a bit since he was sure it made him look even less like he belonged here. This part of town definitely wasn’t terribly familiar, and this building was well outside his financial reach. Of course...that would explain why this person had money to spend on something like this. An app to have people help you with stuff around the house when you apparently had no friends to help with that sort of thing. Still, Sam figured he didn’t have any friends either, so apart from the obvious differences in income maybe there was already a bit he had in common with this...guy? He looked at the name again and bit his tongue. Dandy...that wasn’t exactly a name one heard often if at all. Well, as long as he paid he could have whatever name he wanted. Sam stopped in front of the door, which he quickly realized was the only on on the floor. He knew he’d be going to the top, but he hadn’t expected this would be some kind of penthouse. This guy must have been other level money. Upper floor money. Clearly. Shoot, if he’d known he’d be working at the ritz he would have shaved first. No wonder the desk clerk had looked at him so funny when he gave her the number. Sam took a breath and knocked on the door, figuring it would be best to actually “show up” on time instead of standing in front of the door for the entirety of the appointment.

[thesmileclown]

@killer-boredom

     The request was just so unusual that Sam was convinced he hadn’t heard him correctly. Not that he had any sort of distaste for Dandy or anything besides just general annoyance (anyone who was around him for more that three seconds could tell you why), but this just seemed a bit strange. “You want to...stay in my room?”

[thesmileclown]

@killer-boredom

“Well, I’m glad you liked them since they were yours to enjoy,” Dandy shrugged, looking at the devastated remains of the cookie situation. “I won’t stand for you making yourself sick though,” he added in a lightly scolding tone, putting his hands on Sam’s tummy to offer comfort, “treats are supposed to make you feel good, not bad about yourself. 

Sam bit his lip, looking down at the empty package, his stomach already starting to gurgle in protest of his impulsive behavior. “Yeah, well....it’s been kinda a weird day for me,” he replied, the light pressure of Dandy’s hands providing some comfort as he leaned back in his seat. “Stupid stuff really,” he added, arching his back a bit to push his stomach more into Dandy’s hands, an invitation for him to do more, his eyelids drooping as he felt the drowsy post food coma coming on.

[thesmileclown]

“You could crush my head with your thighs and I would thank you for it.”

@killer-boredom

          “Is…is that a thing people like?” Sam asked, more than a little bit perplexed. It wasn’t often, but every now and again Dandy would come up with some phrase he hadn’t heard before, and god, it made him feel old. “I mean…I guess I know people like everything. Death by leg seems kinda final though…”