#kingdomsrp

[detvar-blog]

so excited!!!!!!!1 adkjskjskjdkdj dead 

[selecaos]

cut off all of your hair.  did you flinch, did you care?  did he look, did he stop and stare at your brand new hair?

shit sorry i forgot the cut, now bits of alice's app are under the cut:

It doesn't work when the yelling stops, when your mother stops yelling and just leaves.  Covering your ears doesn't work when there's nothing to block out and everything comes rushing at you from all directions.  Your mother isn't there to sigh when you come running in with bruised knees or to yell at you when you (accidentally) set the curtains on fire.

The poor Prewett girl, whose mother didn't care enough to stick around.

(Now you close your eyes and cover your ears so you can't see the pitying looks, so you can't hear their pitying words.)

You hold your tongue when people insult your mother, because to do otherwise is rude, and she's just gone for now.  She'll come back soon, every time she leaves she comes back and that's the important part.  Your mother always comes back, like a boomerang, she's a boomerang.  Even if (when, it's not an if, it's never been an if, even if you and your father didn't want to admit to it, it was never an if) she leaves, she'll always come back.  Your father always bends down in front of you, brushes your hair out of your eyes, and tells you that she'll be back, it's just for now.  It always lingers in the air, that it is not her fault, never her fault.  Nobody's fault except her mother's.

Except you can't help but blame yourself, a little bit.

You shut your eyes and cover your ears, pretending not to see the looks, hear what they're saying, and pretending that everything isn't your fault.

When she comes back, nearly a year later, everything goes back to normal.  Except you hate her a little bit (you're nine and a half and you hate your mother with almost all of your little body), you flinch away when she tries to touch you and you don't understand how your parents can go back to normal.

Or at least, the version of normal that fits your parents.  They are cordial, always have been cordial, always will be cordial.  (They aren't in love, haven't been in love for years but it's not like they're at each other's throats, they're just comfortably cordial.)

You don't understand, but it works and your parents seem content enough with the way everything is.  They were betrothed, then married, then had a child quickly thereafter and they were stuck together.  It's not a perfect love story, nobody has those, and they're the reason you're disillusioned (with life, with love, with people).

You suppose that you understand, but how quiet (or loud, depending on the day) is nerve wracking, but becomes the norm.  It's not normal, how easily you adjust to your parents and how they aren't cold, but aren't necessarily warm.  How you become accustomed to and think it's the norm (for everyone) and how you wind up adding to the terse, cordial atmosphere by letting it define you.

Your home life isn't the best, but it isn't the worst by any stretch of the imagination.  It just isn't the best by any means.

there'll be a fuckton more (apologies to kass and alex given that i'm already at like 700 words oops)

[pullinyouunder]

rabastan lestrange, twenty, death eater, borys starosz

  this handsome devil is rabastan

emphasis on the devil, he just might be him incarnate (if you believe in such things)

he's the youngest of the lestrange brothers, and sort of hero worships his older brother rodolphus

but he won't admit that because he's also jealous of everything that rodolphus has

including his bride to be, bellatrix black

rabastan has always been the sort to want what he can't have, think of it as youngest child syndrome

he's also a raving lunatic, creating horrible messes that he leaves for his big brother to clean up for him

until he stopped, and that's when rab cracked a little more

see his upbringing was strict and harsh. his parents didn't have time or tolerance for disobedience. they expected perfection, and rabastan was the furthest thing from perfection

he has a sick and twisted mind, a violent streak a mile wide, and a curiousity when it comes to pain, torture and death

he'd conduct little experiments, an rodolphus made sure that mummy and daddy never found out. and then one day he refused to do that anymore, leaving rab to the conclusion that he could be the only one that he counted on. that he was alone. it was him and only him.

this line of thinking made him go just a little more mad, and also put a dent in the brother's relationship

they're still close mind you, there's just this strange under current that weaves it's way in and tends to poison things

it also means that rab doesn't care if rodolphus finds out about him and bella screwing around behind his back

in fact, he hopes he finds out

he needs things, like someone else to mess around with and use, because he's heartless like that

[roleplayparty]

if you hang out with zelda, zelda's gonna be a bad influence on you

[rgvnsey]

i should probably do blurbs huh