Klonnie Weekend 2025: Fake Dating
It starts, as these things often do in her life, with a threat.
Bonnie is on her way home from her first actual date sheâs been on since Jeremy kissed a ghost. Probably her first actual date, period, she considers with a twinge. Nothing special, just burgers and fries at the Grillâbut sheâs feeling kind of good. Lip gloss still intact. Curls still bouncing. And thenâ
âWitch.â
She freezes, one hand tightening around the strap of her purse. Thereâs mace inside, but she knows that wonât do any good. The night air had been warm against her skin, scented with honeysuckle and the last ghost of spring rain, but now she feels a shiver run up her spine.
âWitch,â he repeats like she hadnât heard him the first time. Like her fight or flight hadnât just kicked into overdrive and he canât hear the frantic tattoo of her heart. She takes a breath, turning slowly.
And, yup, there he is.
Klaus âkill everyone youâve ever lovedâ Mikaelson standing beneath the shadows of a broken street-lamp, calm and terrible and annoyingly unruffled for midnight.
âHybrid,â she greets in return, because why not.
The corner of his mouth twitches.
For a moment, he says nothing more. Just lets his gaze sweep her from head to foot in an indolent appraisal that has her spine snapping tight and magic humming beneath her skin.
That twitch becomes a smirk. âRelax, little witch. Iâm not here to fight.â
âThen what are you here for?â She asks.
âI need your assistance,â he says, like it was a favor, like he hadnât attempted to murder her best friend less than a year ago and threatened to dismember her in at least three different ways.
She folds her arms. âWhy would I help you?â
Klaus opens his mouthâalmost certainly to offer some graphic promise of death or dismembermentâbut she cuts him off. âYou know what, donât. I get it. Carnage, pain, everyone I love in pieces. Classic. What is it this time? Linking spell? Did you lock Elijah in a coffin and lose the key?â
She has no idea where this sass is coming from and the survival instinct in her brain is screaming at her to âshut upâ but every time she quips, that mouth twitches and she can see the faintest hint ofâŠdimples?
âNothing so terrible,â he replies, tone light. âA bit of your witchy blood, a small incantation, and thenâpoofâyouâre free to resume whatever terribly dull life youâre leading.â He holds an arm out as if to usher her along.
She blinks. âWhat? Now?â
âNo time like the present.â
Bonnie grumbles, under her breath, just the teeniest bit defiant, because damn it, sheâs tired, and she wants a good nightâs sleep, and really was it so much to ask that date night not be a bustâwhen Klausâs next words stop her mid-ramble.
âYou smell like grease.â
She looks at him, eyes narrowing. âI smell like Daisy.â
âYes, your floral perfume is there, as is your usual, inviting earthy scent. But you do smell like grease and burgers.â
She had an earthy scene? It was âinvitingâ? Nevermind that. âI was at the Grill.â Why is she explaining herself to him?
âThe Grill.â His lip curls. âFor a date?â
âUh, yeah.â
He pauses again, looks at the empty street, then back to her. Then, disdainful: âAnd where is this date of yours?â
âTrevor has practiââ
âTrevor?â Klaus seems positively revolted by the name. âTrevor?â Klaus repeats, like the word itself is offensive. âYou let a boy named Trevor take you on a date?â
Bonnie crosses her arms tighter. âItâs not that serious.â
âClearly,â he mutters. âHe abandoned you at the curb and didnât even walk you to your door.â
Bonnie scowls. âLike I was sayingâhe has practice in the morning.â
Klausâs eyes narrow. âSo he left you alone. At night. After burgers. In Mystic Falls. Where half the population seems to be supernatural and the other half perpetually under threat.â
She blinks. ââŠAre you lecturing me right now?â
âNo,â he says, too quickly. âBut if I were, it would be well deserved.â
âOh my god.â She pinches the bridge of her nose. âThis is not happening.â
Klaus takes a deliberate step closer, hands clasped behind his back like some academic lecturer about to give a lesson. âDating as a concept emerged in the early 20th century, particularly in the 1920s. This shift was influenced by factors like women's increased participation in society, and their involvement in selecting partners without familial obligations.â
Oh. Shit. It is a lecture.
âA date should be a celebration of that choice,â he continued. âSomething more than meat and mediocrity. A date, when done right, is the art of showing appreciation. Of anticipation.â He let his gaze wander over her face, lingering on her lips before back to her eyes. âThe beginning of seduction.â
She ignores the way heat creeps up her neck, into her cheeks. the way her pulse is still racing, but not from fearâŠmore like the anticipation heâs told her about. And she absolutely ignores the way her mouth feels heavy under his gaze, lips wanting to part.
âNo wonder we couldnât tell you apart from Alaric,â she comments, taking a step back. âGiving lectures nobody asked for.â She turns toward her front door. âLook, itâs late. Some of us arenât nocturnal, so if itâs not life or death, Iâm going to bed. Youâll get your blood and your spell tomorrow.â
He doesnât grab her arm. Doesnât halt her, so she takes that as permission. She barely makes it up the step before his voice halts her again, lower now, silk-wrapped iron: âLet me show you.â
She holds the key in the knob, but doesnât turn. âShow me what?â
âWhat it should be. A date. Not a sloppy imitation done by the likes of boys named Trevor.â
Bonnie glances at him over her shoulder, trying to decide if heâs actually serious. He is. Of course he is. His expression is maddeningly sincere, and thereâs a gleam in his eyes that feels a little too close to temptation.
âYou want to take me on a date?â
âNot a real one,â he clarifies. âA demonstration. A model. One you can hold up against future offers and reject them accordingly.â
She sighs, turning the key. Honestly, she doesnât have the energy for this. âYouâre doing this to mock me.â
âIâm doing this,â Klaus says smoothly, âbecause it is offensive to the very concept of courtship that someone like you doesnât know what it should feel like.â
âGoodnight, Klaus.â She steps through, closing the door behind her. She locks it for good measure.
He doesnât follow. Doesnât press. Which, in hindsight, shouldâve been the first clue.
The next evening, Bonnie lights a candle on her nightstand, just like Grams taught her. Mugwort and bay for clarity, lavender to soothe. Sheâs in an oversized Metallica T-shirt, hair twisted up, just beginning to cue up an old episode of Criminal Minds when she feels itâthe subtle flex of power against her magic.
Thereâs a knock.
Polite, for once. Which is exactly why it unnerves her.
She debates on ignoring it.
Sheâs already sent him her blood, cast the spellâa simple binding on a grimoireâpreventing anyone but him (and oddly, herself) from opening it.
He knocks again. Three short, evenly spaced raps.
Bonnie sighs, blowing a curl from her eyes and opens the door. Sheâs tempted to tell him that sheâs going to start charging by the hour. He can afford it. But all of her snark dies in her throat the moment she sees him.
Klaus stands on her porch in tailored dark clothesânot quite a suit, but deliberate. Dark slacks, a crisp open collar, sleeves rolled to the forearm. In his hands: a lush bouquet of dusky red peonies and soft white jasmine. They smell like twilight and stolen things.
âI said no,â Bonnie says automatically, though it lacks any heat.
He tilts his head. âOdd. I didnât hear ânoâ. I heard: âGoodnight, Klaus.ââ
Heâs technically correct, which is her least favorite kind of correct. Sheâs about to tell him no, in no uncertain terms, when he continues.
âIâm already here, love. Terrible form to deny me now.â He holds the flowers toward her.
They are gorgeous, full, flawless blooms and rich heady scent. Itâs the first time anyone has ever gotten her any.
She should toss them into the bin.
Instead, she takes them with a muttered, âYouâre insufferable.â
He grins. âStill not a no.â
âYouâre not going to let this go are you?â
He doesnât respond, but itâs on his face.
Bonnie shakes her head. âFine. Wait here.â Sheâs not about to invite him in.
When she returns, itâs in a cream-colored blouse edged in lace, tucked into a flowy patterned skirt that swirls when she walks. Her hair is down, loose, natural, around her shoulders. She doesnât bother with make-up or jewelry.
This isnât really a date.
Itâs a lesson.
Sheâll treat it as such.
Which turns out to be harder than it sounds.
Because when Klaus sees herâhis expression shifts. Not his usual appraising calculationâsomething quieter. A little softer. Like the sight of her in moonlight and lace might actually be beautiful.
âReady?â he asks, voice dipped low.
Bonnie inhales and exhales a deep breath. âLetâs just get this over with.â
He offers his arm.
She doesnât take itânot at firstâbut then he cocks his head, eyebrow raised in challenge.
She tosses him a look, but links her elbow through his, annoyed at how natural it feels. The scent of his cologne is faintâspiced woods and something wilder. She breathes it in before she can stop herself.
She expects a car, chandeliers, a compelled maĂźtre dâ. Something grotesquely extravagant, probably featuring a string quartet and gold utensils. Something that shows how unlimited his influence actually is. A show of arrogance.
So sheâs surprised when Klaus walks her two blocks down the street, cutting across a small wooden bridge near the edge of town. He leads her through a narrow, pebbled trail behind the old library. When the path opens up, her breath catches.
Itâs a clearing tucked beneath a canopy of weeping willows, their branches sweeping low and silver in the moonlight. It smells like crushed herbs, clean earth, and something sweetâberries, maybe. Or honey.
The grass is soft and wild, the ground scattered with dandelions and moss. In the center is a picnic blanketâthick, deep red, clean despite the earthâand set atop it are small lanterns glowing like fireflies.
On the blanket: fresh bread, a jar of dark jam, cold chicken sliced and wrapped neatly in wax paper. Cheese. Tiny peaches. A bottle of wine, no label, no corkâsealed with wax.
Bonnie stops short.
Klaus watches her reaction the way a painter watches a canvas take color. âThe Grill is beneath you,â is all he says.
She really doesnât know what to say to that so she keeps her silence.
He holds her hand as she lowers herself to the blanketâkeeping her steady. After that itâs a handful of small things that ripple through the night.
He pours the wine for her. Offers a cloth napkin. Cuts the peach with the knife she was eyeing but didnât want to reach for.
âThis,â Klaus murmurs, handing her the fruit, âis only one form of appreciation.â
âFood as appreciation? I can see that,â she says, biting into a slice.
He hums. âMost people donât.â
She hates that she kind of agrees with him. Most people overlook the little gestures.
They eat slowly. The chicken is seasoned with something fragrantârosemary or maybe thyme. The bread is soft. The cheese, sharp. Bonnie lets herself enjoy it, a little. She hasnât had a meal that hadnât involved a microwave in longer than she can remember.
When they talk, itâs not about the usual things. No magic. No threats. No blood.
Klaus tells her about Florence in the 1500s and how Italian peaches used to be bitter until witches started grafting sweetness into the skin. She listens in spite of herself. Finds his occasional biting commentary both snobbish and amusing.
She thinks, briefly, he looks almost human like this.
So when he asks, âWhat do you think about?â
She answers.
Maybe because itâs not real.
Thereâs no pressure to perform. No masks to wear. No expectations to meet.
She doesnât have to be the strong one for him. The one who doesnât askâwho gives.
She tells him about Grams. About how quiet the kitchen feels now and how sometimes, the smell of jasmine makes her cry without knowing why. She tells him that she used to dream of traveling the world, but now she just dreams of finding a small place in it.
He listens. Like sheâs the only thing that matters.
And that, more than anything, is what undoes her.
Not the wine. Not the food. Not even the way the moonlight threads silver through his lashes.
Itâs that he sees her. And seems to like what he sees.
She doesnât trust it.
But, for tonight, for this moment, she lets herself have it.
By the time he walks her back into town, the moon is low and the shadows are long. The wine has left her warm. Drowsy.
He doesnât leave her at the curb. He walks her all the way to her porch.
âWell,â she says, clearing her throat. âThanks for the fake date.â
Klaus arches a brow. âFake?â
âI meanâmodel. Example? Lesson.â She settles on.
His eyes gleam. âThe nightâs not over,â he tells her, stepping forward, just close enough for her to feel the heat of him. âAnd for clarificationâthis part,â he says, voice velvet-dark, âis very real.â
He leans in, slow and deliberate. And he kisses her.
Not a demand. Not a possession. Just a touchâwarm, slow, reverent.
Like sheâs something precious.
Like heâs tasting the possibility of something he hasnât dared name.
And BonnieâŠBonnie lets him.
For a second too long, maybe. Or maybe just long enough.
He tastes like peaches and wine.
When she finally pulls back, itâs not with a slap or a spell or even a warning.
Itâs with a soft exhale. A breath they both feel.
She opens her eyes, and heâs still watching herâclosely. Carefully.
His expression isnât smug. It isnât triumphant. Itâs something⊠else. Almost hesitant. Like he was expecting the slap or the spell.
A heartbeat passes, then another, and finally he whispers, âGoodnight, Bonnie,â quiet and sure.
She doesnât answer. Doesnât trust her voice.
Just steps back through the door and closes it quietly. She doesnât lock it.

















