One of consequences of using real languages as a base/stand-in for made-up languages is that you've got to imagine Nika sounds just a little bit Italian.
Like, I know the Latin to modern Italian timeline isn't a super straight line or whatever, but from a kind of squinty, one-eyed, what's gonna make sense perspective Nika's gonna sound a little bit Italian.
I should probably describe him gesturing more. I think he does use a lot of physical language, but until he stops thinking of Ainjir as slightly stupid aliens he's not going to be operating with his normal array of gestures and comfort. But like... is there anything more
🤌
than Nika sometimes? Just two hands raised
🤌🤌
at all times. The man is confused. He is offended. He is in disbelief.
And, similarly, Cole needs to sound just a little bit Irish. But then you've really gone and done it because what kind of Irish accent are we talking about?
I'm going to copy over the Author's Note that you'll see at the beginning of the post below, for a somewhat new story: Keadar: A pre-Kostas Story
Author’s Note: This one will require some context to understand.
I don’t think I ever published this one anywhere; I would call the draft I had of it unfinished. It’s sort of the start of the novel that would tell the story of how Keadar-Ainjir came to be in power - his coup, basically. That means it takes place well before the culture of Ainjir as represented in Kostas has come to be - you still have something of a triumvirate government of priestesses, nobility, and army, you still have widespread and actively practiced religious belief, you still have a very uncertain country somewhat defined by its uncertainty as much as anything else.
That’s why you’re going to see the word ‘Monday’ - believe me I took it out, put it in, took it out, came up with new word, put that in, took it out, wrote Monday again, etc - because we’re going full Tolkien-esque ‘this is translated’ and frankly it didn’t make any fucking sense if I put in too much of a different word, and anyway, it’s moon-day of whatever so it’s not really religious BUT that’s not what the process of secularization did in Ainjir which is all fuckin’ way too much to get into, so it’s Monday.
I know why I left this unfinished and haven’t returned to it, and it’s because I just don’t have the energy at the moment to tackle this novel. IF I were to write it, it would be a full-on, old-school court drama style sprawling tale of intrigue and war and philosophy and loyalty and betrayal and all of that. It would be a lot. I might do the post-Kostas novel first, but even that’s got to wait for the end of Academy Days. And I like these guys, and I hate to spoil it but they are super gonna die. I mean, Madadh is Keadar-Ainjir, so we know he’s going to succeed, right? That’s not really a spoiler. More a bone of the whole tragedy skeleton. And it is really a tragedy.
you know, Cole and Nika lost their war, too. why am I always writing about dudes losing wars?
Anywho, hopefully that’s enough context that the story is enjoyable
applied writing technique: [character] wants ____, but ____, therefore ____.
Esras Cole wants to rise to the top of the military hierarchy, but he falls in love with mad goblin, therefore the world must accept the mad goblin.
Dominicus Galen wants to be a good son, but his father wants him to consort with faithless hedonists, therefore he will conquer the faithless hedonists who aren't that good at their own skills.
No, wait
Esras Cole wants to achieve the highest rank as a cadet, but Dominicus Galen also wants to achieve the highest rank as a cadet, therefore they will fuck a lot?
Hang on...
Esras Cole wants to be recognized for his talents, but one of his talents is loose morals, therefore not like that
Dominicus Galen wants very much to be the best possible morally-unquestionable Midraeic son, but makes bad life choices, therefore falls in love with famously loose morals-having Esras Cole.
I think we're getting closer.
Esras Cole wants unfathomable social and political power and also probably money, but Dominicus Galen is there, therefore maybe he can have it all?
Dominicus Galen wants to dunk on the entirety of Ainjir, but so does the Comid army, therefore not like that at all, fuck!
one last go
Esras Cole wants Dominicus Galen and Dominicus Galen also wants Esras Cole, but they are both fools who are too smart for their own good, therefore things will be way more complicated than they need to be.
Trying to get myself back in the habit of writing by doing little nonsense posts.
I'm thinking about that "what lie does you character tell themselves to sleep at night" thing I reblogged earlier and as people who have legitimately killed thousands as well as committed actual war crimes in their capacity as military leaders, well that's a big question depending on when you're asking it (as rehearsed in the tags of that post). [some thoughts below]
However it did lead me down the path of why young Nika spends so much time lying to himself - knowingly and unknowingly - and has such a hard time adapting to the Academy (not the hardest, but it's not easy). I mean, I don't know how interesting it is as an answer, but his whole youth up until that point, he has been very sure of himself. There's a lot of excellently-defined roles for him to fall into, yeah? He's the first son, his father is a teacher, his religion - for all its love of discussion, debate, and wild emotional flare-ups - has some pretty fuckin' clear guidelines if you don't want to be asking too many questions. There isn't ACTUALLY a stricture against homosexuality - you could interpret a fair number of the texts very queerly - it's a belief buried a couple of arguments deep into consequences of interpretations of what's actually outlined as strictures.
(Fundamentally, in feeling the way he feels, he would be violating the call to Duty, for complicated theological reasons I'm not getting into here, which is a principle obligation of being of his religion. But even then, it's not the feeling that's the violation, it's the action - he can feel however he wants, that's all good, but when he decides 'no, I am in love, this is love, I am going to treat it like love,' that's when things get fucky)
((It's way easier to just pretend he's not feeling things, and even to pretend he's only feeling physical things, so he does that a lot, even still))
But, I mean, that's the deep part of the storyline (it's a romance, it's about romance, I can't help it), on the surface Nika just had a very secure self-perception and very clear path in life, and this whole experiment of sending him to Academy has really fucked it all up. And he's a dutiful son, I mean, that's his whole deal, but he's also actually quite aware that he's not PERFECTLY dutiful and he falls short, and that's all good, but he's still going to GO FOR being a totally dutiful son.
And it is WILD to him what his father has chosen. It's wild to most of their community. It's wild to everybody. But he's very dutifully trying to understand, and trying to get himself into it, but he really doesn't fuckin' understand and he's got quite a bit of built up habit of 'behaving as dutiful son regardless of Things' as well as 'I am this way and this is the way I am as a person' and it's just fuckin' dissolving, like his self-knowledge is cotton candy and he's the raccoon trying to wash it in the stream.
I mean, he saw some WILD crash-outs (as the kids call them these days) from Catillia when he was younger. She's one of his models for behavior - she's extremely sure of herself, in ways even he wouldn't dare be - but she's got some serious trauma, and while they don't have a sophisticated understanding of PTSD or whatever, watching her lose it at her stepmother or her father in her teen years just kind of Made Sense given what she had been through (Auriol, who was younger, gets a tinge of it, but has basically memory-holed the whole experience and for her, maintaining equilibrium is the safest possible way to behave - not that she never loses it, but the way that she loses is much quieter and arguably much more deadly). But in a way, he could always balance himself against Catillia; she was the one who would push boundaries, who would question and dare, and he could be steady. She took the risks and he grounded them.
So Catillia, naturally, FREAKS OUT at their father's idea, because what the fuck? And Nika is like 'no, I will do this, it's entirely sensical, yes this is a good idea and I will do good at it.' But then, you know, he's got to actually, like, DO it. And he's like 'fuck, I don't get it, I don't know what I'm supposed to do, I don't know that this is a good idea, I'm not doing good at this.' I mean, even Auriol got a little a scratchy about it, so he should have realized, but it's all habit at this point, you know? And it makes him feel special. Yes, being born the first son makes him special, but his father never really treated him special because of that so this is the first time something really important and independent has been VESTED in him as regards his status as first son. Plus what kind of specialness is the specialness you're just born with - that's hardly your doing - this can be his doing, if he can do it right.
so I dunno, maybe I'll write a little thing about him and his siblings when they were kids. explore the building of this little weirdo a bit.
