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New Old Fashioned
I readily admit that an Old Fashioned is best made the old proper way (no cherry, no water/soda, lemon peel-- not an orange wedge), however it's fun to experiment. Tonight I made one out of Meyers Lemon and used orange bitters. It's a totally different drink and it's quite good. It's not a replacement but it's definitely not bad. What are your versions of this cocktail?
Free Hand Sanitizer
Customer: Y'all happen to have any hand sanitizer? Last Call Luke: Yep, there's a large bottle of it sitting over there on that unused register. Customer: Cool. Is it free? Last Call Luke: What? Have you actually been charged for using hand sanitizer? Customer: Shit yes.
Parent of the Year #1
A customer asked me to watch their kid while they shopped. Seriously.
Catching up.
I realize that I haven't written much lately. I just had a very rough semester where I had more than usual on my plate. That semester is over. I am now a supervisor at the liquor store. On my first day as a supervisor a woman came in who was literally COVERED, from shoulders to knees, in what I can only imagine by smell, to be human waste. We kicked her out because she was an actual health code violation. One hour later, I sold $80 worth of craft beer to Mr. George Wendt, aka Norm from Cheers. Last Call Luke is back, in full effect.
Courtesy of an old partner in crime Todd "Officer, do you ever use those cuffs for extracurricular activities" Sunset.
The Baron of Bärenjäger
Not a quote, but a customer buys a pint of Barenjager a day. Listen to me. A whole PINT of honey liqueur EVERY DAY. I'm not saying he's an alcoholic or whatever, I'm just saying that man REALLY digs a very unusual alcohol.
I want cake wine.
Customer: Do you know if Cupcake's Red Velvet wine tastes like red velvet cake?
Last Call Luke: I haven't had it myself, but I'd imagine it's probably more like most red wines simply because it is a red wine.
Customer: I don't like red wine at all. You really don't think it tastes like red velvet cake?
Last Call Luke: (reading the wine label) Ah, here it says "aromas of chocolate, deep dark blackberries and luscious red fruits." Nope, that sounds more like Cab or a Merlot to me. Maybe they mean red velvet like the fabric. Y'know, smooth, maybe. Customer: That's a bunch of bullshit if you ask me. I want cake wine.
Oh, it's free!
"Oh, it's free!" isn't a quote from any one customer. It's a quote from about ten random customers I hear every night I work every time the barcode scanner doesn't immediately register their purchase. They think they're original and hilarious every time.
