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Oct 19, 2018

Fearing the Truth- Latte Bang

Title: Fearing the Truth Rating: Gen Ships: Matt/Lance, Matt & Pidge, Matt & Lance, Lance & Pidge, Lance & Hunk Tags: Miscommunication, Friends to Lovers, mixed pronouns for Pidge, depends on who is talking to them, Lance does YouTube and Matt is his biggest fan, kinda sad backstory Summary: Lance has had a crush on Pidge's brother, Matt since he was 17. Matt was only 21 at the time. A few years later the two meet up again, only this time Matt is the one hopelessly crushing on Lance. Wrote for the @unofficial-lattebang [Comes with ART] [Also unbeta'd :3] AO3: Fearing The Truth

When Lance had started his journey on social media he really expected it to take longer. His content wasn’t very good and there was always going to be someone out there that was better than him. He expected it would take years to get even a decent following, but that quickly changed when one follower started messaging him.

The follower went by MattTheSpaceMan69 and Lance thought that he was so precious. He gave tips and advice for Lance to use, often suggesting how to calibrate the camera and audio equipment to produce better quality content. Lance could honestly call him his oldest subscriber, having subscribed shortly after the channel was started. Lance didn't know who he was outside of the screen but he hoped to meet one day.

Lance's thoughts on the subscriber changed shortly after. He was always so nice and told Lance the sweetest things; his eyes like sapphires, skin touched by golden light. He often made Lance flustered, they still talked on a regular basis but no matter how flustered he got, Lance had eyes for someone else. Matt Holt. It wasn't until his junior year of high school that he met the giant nerd but that day had changed him.

Lance remembers it clearly, he had been on the Student Council, was the treasurer and the class representative for Juniors, so it was his job to show new students around, especially those that are in his grade. This, of course, brought him to Katie. The first time he had met them and welcomed them to the school they just about punched him. Later he found out that they preferred the name Pidge.

Two months into the new transfer had Lance and Pidge working together. He explicitly remembers the history project and how he had suggested they go to Pidge’s house after explaining that they wouldn't be able to study due to his large family; constant noise regardless of where you were. Pidge agreed and made a comment about how the only issue they had to worry about was their older brother, Matt, who would most likely be at work for a while. =

His first day at Pidge’s house found him looking at an older version of Pidge. They had told Lance that they were essentially twins, just born a few years apart. Their likes and hobbies were basically the same which caused Lance to be a bit cautious; Pidge had a love for conspiracy's and all things electronic. So when Matt didn't jump right into talking about conspiracy theories like Pidge had done when they first met, Lance was extremely upset. Here he was in front of a cute guy who just so happens to be a few years older than him and all he got in reply when he introduced himself was a grunt, some scribbling on papers and a sigh. Given, Lance thought it was the cutest grunt he had ever heard but that was neither here nor there.

Ever since that day, Lance only ever caught glances of Matt, even when he lived at Pidge's house for a week studying for midterms. Lance felt like he was being ignored and he didn't like the feeling. Eventually, Lance gave up on his stupid crush. Swept it into the back of his mind and locked it up, or so he had thought until a lovely follower started talking to him. Which brought him full circle, fleet thoughts of it he was just attracted to people named Matt.

Lance knew deep down that this most likely an overzealous fan who just so happened to have the name, Matt. Matt was a pretty popular name, so he wouldn't be surprised if there were a few Matt's following him. Shaking the thought from his head he sent a quick text to Pidge about how he would be over shortly and to cook all the popcorn. It was time to play some games.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Matt’s first time meeting Lance, properly, was the last thing he expected when he got home. He remembers a fleeting meeting a few years back but he was so caught up in school work that he had all but ignored the two. He does remember seeing Lance from afar one day and wanting nothing more than to see if Lance's skin was as smooth as it looked. From that day on, Matt made sure he was always busy or never around when Lance was there, the last thing he needed was for someone to call him a creep for liking someone who wasn't of age.

Matt was anxious. On a normal day, Pidge would be playing some sort of game or working away on their computer but not today. This was the very day that he found the man he loves, sitting in his chair, playing his game with his little sister. Now what he meant by his chair and his game was that Lance McClain was sitting in the chair he normally uses and was, in fact, playing the game that he had created. Pidge had talked him into designing a game, it never went public, most likely never would but it was a combination of their brains, a brainchild if you wanted to call it, and here Lance was, playing it with such concentration. Matt felt his chest swell, pride blossoming as he watched Lance, or so he thought. Going from prideful to anxious in just a matter of minutes as butterflies fluttered in his stomach.

“Oh man! Pidge! You have to tell me where you got this game. Why haven't I heard of it before?”

Matt heard Pidge snort, he could imagine them rolling their eyes as they away on their computer, a faint clicking of keys told him as much.

“You have got to promise me that you won't tell anyone, okay?”

Matt watched Lance nod, his head turning so he was facing where Matt could only assume Pidge was, on the floor beside Lance’s legs. “Of course, I've kept all your secrets until now, haven't I?”

There was a breath of silence before Pidge started talking again. “I don't know, Lance. Have you kept my secrets?”

Lance inhaled sharply and Matt watched his back move as hands gripped at what Matt thought was his heart. “How dare you, Gremlin. I've done nothing but been a good friend and this is how you treat me? For shame, Pidge!”

Pidge laughed softly before a smack was heard, Matt could only assume Pidge had slapped Lance. A girlish scream was heard before both of them started laughing. Those fuzzy feelings were back as he listened to Lance laugh. It sounded like a genuine laugh, not like the ones in his videos, Matt was on cloud nine. The laughter died shortly and Matt listened to Pidge carry on.

“No, but really. It has to stay between you and me, nobody else should know.”

“Got it, just between us! So, where'd you get the game, Pidge?”

“My brother and I created it. Matt always wanted to be an astronaut but due to circumstances, he wasn't able to go through with that dream. So he fell back on his programming skills and is working at a stupid company that treats him like shit. Anyways, I asked him one day to help me design a game, though it would be a good bonding experience for us. Thought it would open his eyes to an entirely different job he could go into, it didn’t, but yeah. This is the only copy, and you have to promise not to tell anyone about it. You hear me, Lance? Not a single word.”

“Of course. My lips are sealed. That's pretty impressive tho, so who made the character models, the backgrounds?”

Matt sighed as he shook his head, he needed to put an end to this before Pidge spilled everything. He opened the door and closed it, loud enough so the two could hear. “I’m home!”

His voice was cheerful as he turned around to look at the other two. Two sets of eyes were on him in an instant and the pair of blue eyes locked with his, he was falling.

“Hey Matt, let me introduce you to Lance. Lance is one of my friends from high school. Lance, this is Matt. my brother.”

Their eyes stayed lock for a few seconds more before Lance looked away, eyes cast to the side. He cleared his throat before looking back at Matt, his voice sounded strained. “Hiya, I'm Lance, Lance McClain. It's a pleasure to meet you, man. Pidge has told me so much about you.”

Matt raised an eyebrow at that, a soft smile forming on his lips. “Oh? What has she told you about me?”

Matt watched as Lance’s face darkened just a tad, his cheeks taking on a more reddish hue as he coughed once. “Oh, ya know, stuff. Like you work at some big computer company, and uh, yeah, stuff.”

“I hope it was all good stuff,” Matt spoke casually as he tossed his bag on to the couch. He took off his jacket and shoes before rolling up his sleeves and walking towards the kitchen. “You staying for dinner, Lance?”

Lance’s eyes widened a bit as he looked down at Pidge, a smirk playing on their face. He frowned softly at them before he looked back to Matt and shook his head.

“Nah, I should get going. My roommate, Hunk, is probably making something amazing.” Lance spoke as he got up and moved towards the door. He picked up his bag from where it sat by the door and smiled one last time at both of them.

“Anyways, see you tomorrow, Pidge.”

“Make sure you bring me leftovers! If you don't you're dead!”

Lance laughed softly and shook his head. “Of course. Bye Matt.”

Matt waved as Lance left and as soon as the door closed he slumped against a wall, a heavy sigh leaving him as he tried to calm his beating heart.

~~~~~~Lance~~~~~~

To say Lance was pissed would be an understatement. He was furious. The guy he's been pining for doesn't even remember meeting back when Lance was 17. This was the first real interaction they had and the least that Matt could have done was to remember one of Pidge's best friends. The balls on this dude. Lance sighed as he sat in his car, a sky blue 2010 Ford Focus. He had named her Blue and she was his baby.

The car was originally owned by his older brother, Luis, but shortly after he had married and had children, they decided it would be best to get a new car, one that could hold more McClain members if needed and the car ended up in Lance's possession ever since. Lance likes to take pride in his car, he kept her well maintained which is to say better maintained than his love life. He knew that he needed to get home to the place he shared with Hunk but he didn't feel like it.

Leaning back in the front seat had him sighing. If he couldn't get with Matt Holt, maybe he could get with SpaceMan. It wasn't like he was against online dating, he just preferred the local populous since he's a clingy bastard. Didn't SpaceMan mention something about my legs? The thought came to him randomly. Turning on his phone's screen he went to Instagram and quickly looked through his recent messages. Like always, the last person he talked to was, in fact, MattTheSpaceMan69 and the last thing that was sent was a message about how nice Lance's legs are. Lance never would have guessed that someone would take notice of anything about him aside from his face and winning personality.

Reading the messages again has his cheeks flushing and his heart nearly skipping a beat. Maybe he should take a drive down to the mall and get new clothes for a new video. ‘Cute clothes for the Summer season?’ Oh, how about ‘Cute summer date outfits?’ He casually wondering on if he should just do some looks with the clothes he already had but decided that a well-deserved shopping day was needed.

After spending hours at the mall, Lance was thoroughly exhausted. As much fun as one couple have shopping, spending hours trying on clothes with no one's input but your own was kinda boring, okay, extremely boring. At times like these, he wished that he had actual friends who were interested in shopping rather than only his followers being the ones who are interested. Placing the bags into his car, Lance made his way home, thoughts of the video he was going to make tomorrow.

~~~~~~~~

Matt was ecstatic when he got a notification about Lance's new video. He felt pride in knowing the person behind the username BlueLion. Typing in the URL, he quickly clicked on the video and smiled. It started off like all of Lance’s other videos, an opener with a soft guitar intro and colors shifting over the screen before a flag with bi pride colors showed up with his username over it. After the intro, it showed Lance’s smiling face as he waved.

“Welcome back to Blue’s corner. I have a special for you today. If anyone follows me on twitter you probably saw that I was hanging with a friend. Well, I also met my crush yesterday and it got me thinking about date ideas. So here I am to give you guys some cute outfit ideas for summer dates! These outfits work for all occasions, so if you don’t date, don’t worry about it. Just remember to have fun and make it your own. Okay, on to the first outfit!”

Matt sat and watched the whole video, didn’t skip a single part of it. Matt was so happy that Lance took his advice, the video quality went up exceptionally with Matt talking him through what to do and how to do it. He let out a sigh of relief as soon as he heard Lance talk about how there was just one more outfit. Don’t get him wrong, he enjoyed the outfits immensely, mainly due to Lance wearing them but some did catch his eye more so than others. The last outfit was by far his favorite. It showed off just the right amount of tan skin, with Lance’s midriff showing and his long legs stretching off for days.

The outfit was simple, a long sleeve crop top, white collar with white buttons going halfway down the front. The shirt was mainly white with pastel pink and blue stripes that varied in thickness. The next part was a pair of shorts, high waisted shorts that were almost acid washed in color. The front had five buttons, the bottom of the shorts folded up and was probably stitched to look like that. Matt’s eyes followed down the length of Lance’s legs to spot some white socks that were folded over and came to his ankles and a pair of pastel pink sneakers. Lance had stated that he saved the best for last and he really did.

The colors were so soft and looked so well against Lance’s skin tone that Matt could feel himself falling in love with the boy all over again. Matt’s mind started to wander again. Lance had mentioned at the start that he had met with his crush, something heavy settled in Matt’s stomach. He knew he had to tell Lance the truth, it was important to tell him the truth. The real question was if he should tell him in person or over messaging. Matt sighed again before he settled on an option. He opened Instagram on his phone and sent a quick message.

MattTheSpaceMan69 Hey! Just wanted to congratulate you on your new video! Summer date outfits were super cute. I really liked the last one. The colors went really well with your skin tone.

BlueLion hi, and thanks! Makes me really happy to know that you liked it. yeah! i really liked the idea too. my crush made me realize that i shouldn’t just sit and pout about being ignored all day! i know the colors look good! pastels only enhance my beauty! anything you liked in particular?

Matt took a deep breath, Lance had asked him if there was anything he liked. Now would be the best chance to confess, wouldn’t it? His hands got sweaty and his heart rate picked up. He just needed to stay calm, take deep breaths.

MattTheSpaceMan69 I enjoyed the last outfit a lot. I also enjoyed how your legs looked. They looked slender than usual. Blue… I need to tell you something that you might not like.

A few minutes had passed as Matt watched the icon at the bottom indicate that Lance was typing.

BlueLion uh... yeah, okay. what’s up dude?

Matt had a split second of hesitation. Closing his eyes, Matt took a few deep breaths before responding.

MattTheSpaceMan69 I, uh. I haven’t been honest with you. I know exactly who you are, Lance. My name is Matthew Holt and I wanted to apologize for ignoring you. See, when Katie first brought you home and you introduced yourself I was shocked. You were beautiful and seemed so bright, I just didn’t want to come off as weird. You filled the house with so much joy, with a light that seemed to be lacking that I didn’t want to do anything to push you away. I’ve liked you a long time, Lance and I’m sorry that it took me so long to tell you the truth. Please don’t hate me. If you don’t want me to message you ever again please just let me know.

Matt sat there and waited. He was worried, beyond worried about what Lance was thinking, what he was going to respond with. Matt could feel the anxiety crawling through him, seeping from into the deepest, darkest parts of his mind. He had to keep himself busy, keep his mind from falling into the darkness, there was only one certain way to calm himself. Video games with Katie.

~~~~~~~~

About ten minutes after the video went up, Lance got a message on Instagram. It was one of the places he preferred talking to others, especially someone he considered a mutual. The message was from MattTheSpaceMan69 and had his heart skip a beat.

MattTheSpaceMan69 Hey! Just wanted to congratulate you on your new video! Summer date outfits were super cute. I really liked the last one. The colors went really well with your skin tone.

Lance was beyond happy. If he couldn’t get the attention of one Matt Holt, he might as well offer his attention to this Matt. He replied quickly, a smile playing on his lips.

BlueLion hi, and thanks! makes me really happy to know that you liked it. yeah! i really liked the idea too. my crush made me realize that i shouldn’t just sit and pout about being ignored all day! i know the colors look good! pastels only enhance my beauty! anything you liked in particular?

He had almost sent a heart, a simple blue one right at the beginning of the message but he decided against it, didn’t want to come off like some weirdo. Lance ran a hand through hair, a nervous habit that he picked up as a child. He could feel a fluttering in his stomach, it was soft and made him warm. Lance really hoped that the other would mention his legs. After all, he was trying to impress this dude, maybe entice him to come out and meet with Lance one day. He nearly tossed his phone as it went off, notifications telling him that he had a new message.

MattTheSpaceMan69 I enjoyed the last outfit a lot. I also enjoyed how your legs looked. They looked slender than usual. Blue… I need to tell you something that you might not like.

The first have of the messages had his heart fluttering away. A soft smile plastered itself to his face and he felt like he could die happy. As soon as he continued to read, however, his heart plummeted. His throat closed up and his heart stopped. Lance was finding it hard to breathe. He had to sit down, the room was spinning and he couldn’t think. He always hated those words, why do people even use them? Do people just want to cause someone to have an anxiety attack? He took a deep breath before responding.

BlueLion uh... yeah, okay. what’s up dude?

Lance held his breath, lower lip between his teeth and he placed the phone on his bed. His hands started to shake and he gripped the only thing closest to him, a pillow and held it close. His phone started going off a few minutes later. He waited until his phone quieted down before Lance picked it up. He closed his eyes tightly before opening them along with the app.

Lance sat there stunned. That was the last thing he expected. He expected him to come clean about being like an 80-year-old man, not that he was Matthew Holt and that he was purposefully avoiding Lance this entire time. Lance didn’t know what to do. This new information was a lot. On one hand the Matt that helped him was the same Matt that he’s been pining for, for years, but on the other hand, Matt knew who he was and so the introduction from yesterday was absolutely pointless. Who does that to a person? Goes around ignoring them and pretending like you don’t know who someone is only to go through a fake introduction again. Lance was certain of one thing right now, there was no way in hell he ever wanted to talk to Matt again. That meant he would have to message Pidge and get all the times Matt will be out of the house, is it really worth the extra effort just to avoid him? Yes. Yes, it is. Lance could feel a headache forming. He needed to talk to Hunk. Lance threw his phone onto the bed and walked out of his room. It’s a problem for another day.

Lance found Hunk in the kitchen. He sat down at the small two-person table and sighed loudly as he watched Hunk cook. He could tell that there was something boiling on the stove, or maybe there was? He stretched his neck a bit trying to see what was being made but quickly gave up.

“What are we having for dinner tonight, man?”

“I thought it would be nice to have some chicken stew. I’m just about to put the noodles in, do you want to help?”

Hunk’s voice was soft and Lance often wondered if he had some type of intuition that let him know when something was wrong. Lance sighed again, only taking a second to debate if it would do him some good, which in the long run would. Lance reluctantly stood and walked over to the sink so he could wash his hands. Once done, Lance made his way next to Hunk and observed before speaking.

“So, how can I help?”

“I’m going to put in the noodles, do you mind stirring it for me?

Lance smirked as he hip bumped Hunk and nodded. “Of course, babe.”

“Babe? Okay, Lance. Keep trying to sweet talk me, I might let you have seconds.”

He grabbed the big metal spoon and started to stir as he watched Hunk drop in the noodles. It was looking good, Hunk had made homemade noodles as was evident from the flour still covering the counter. Lance continued to watch Hunk, it was mesmerizing to watch such a big guy doing something that usually took a gentle touch. Lance often thought about a life with Hunk. He was soft and kind, had the patience that Lance lacked and was wonderful with kids. Plus he had the whole cooking thing going for him. Lance frowned to himself before he tossed the thought into the trash pile of bad ideas. As much as he wanted to start a family and as nice as Hunk is, he couldn’t get his mind off of Matt.

“Hunk, can I ask you something?” Lance heard Hunk chuckle as he looked up at him.

“Didn’t you already ask me one?”

Lance felt his cheeks heat up slightly as he looked back down at the pot. He shrugged as his voice came out soft. “Yeah, but I meant a relationship question. I have a problem Hunk, and I…” Lance took a deep breath, trying to gather his thoughts before he continued.

“I really like Matt but he lied to me. Maybe lying isn’t the right word but he wasn’t truthful. MattTheSpaceMan69 is Matt’s username, Hunk. I’ve been flirting with Matt the whole time!”

The kitchen was quiet after that. The only sound left was the simmering of the food on the stove. Lance held his breath and waited. What was Hunk going to say? Was he going to call Lance out on this crush? Hunk knew about him having a crush, it was unavoidable as he shared everything with his best friend but Lance never once spoke of a name. Blue eyes darted between the food on the stove that he was still stirring and his best friend. Hunk's brows were closer together as his lips were pressed into a line. Lance wanted to die until he didn't. Hunk's face shifted so fast. A soft smile replaced his pressed lips. His face took on a gentler quality.

“There is nothing wrong with you liking Matt, Lance. Isn't it better that these two guys you liked to happen to be the same person? Now you don't have to choose between them, right?”

Hearing those words helped to calm him down. Hunk was right, with Matt being both his crushes he now didn't have to worry about choosing one over the other, but on the other hand, Matt all but ignored him outside of social media and YouTube.

“Should I just accept that it’s okay for him to ignore me outside of my YouTube videos and social media's?”

It was quiet again. Something Lance hated due to growing up in a full household. Hunk gently placed a hand on his shoulder to signal that he wanted to take over, which meant Lance was in charge of setting the table. Going to the cabinets, Lance grabbed a couple of bowls, cups, and silverware as he started to see the table. Once everything was in place he grabbed their cups and filled them with ice and tea before placing them back on the table. By the time he was done, Hunk was filling the bowls.

Lance sat at one end as he waited. Shortly after, Hunk was sitting down, his soft brown eyes meeting Lance's blue ones.

“You like this guy right?”

“Yeah.”

“And you've liked him for how long?”

Lance took a second to think, a moment later he held up four fingers.

“Is that four weeks, four months, four years?”

Lance shifted his eyes to the side and pulled his lower lip between his teeth. Shoulders shifted in a shrug as he mumbled. A flurry of soft words spilling from his lips. Hunk raised an eyebrow and smiled softly.

“I'm sorry, Lance. I didn't hear that correctly.”

Lance pressed his lips into a line and sighed. He shifted uncomfortably and met Hunk's eyes. “Four years…”

Hunk broke out into a soft smile. “Four years, that's a long time for Lover Boy Lance. Why am I just now hearing about this?”

“I was young and dumb?” Lance supplied and started to curl in on himself.

He understood that Hunk was just trying to get information to help him but he honestly felt like he was being interrogated. Hunk must have noticed because shortly after, a big warm hand pressed gently over one of his own.

“Lance, if you like this guy you should go for it, I wouldn't forget that he ignored you, but he came clean about it. It honestly sounds like he wants to try and work something out with you, I mean, what was the actual reason he ignored you?”

“He said he didn't want to make anything weird and push me away.”

“Why do you think he would've made it weird and pushed you away?”

“I think it was because of the age gap. When we met I was 17 and he was 21, so really I think he was just worried about being called a pedo.”

Lance watched as Hunk choked on his food, eyes going wide before a large hand started pounding on his chest. Lance was worried, he was trying to joke about the issue but thinking on it, the joke wasn't really funny. Lance stood up and leaned over, a hand resting gently against the upper part of one of Hunk's shoulder blades. The best he could do is a gentle rub and a frown.

“Sorry! I know the joke wasn't funny. I shouldn't have said it. Are you okay?”

Hunk coughed a bit more and took a deep breath. He grabbed Lance's hand from his back and held it gently.

“It's okay. Just please, never do it again.”

Lance watched as Hunk took another deep breath before continuing.

“So, do you really think he ignored you because of age?”

Lance sat back down and frowned softly, never letting go of Hunk's hand.

“I mean maybe? He said that I was beautiful and bright and that he didn't want to mess anything up.”

It was quiet again but only for a second. “Well, it could just mean what he said. He met you when you were 17, Lance. It's not proper to get with a minor when you're an adult over the age of 18. I'm sure he was just trying to protect both you and him. I think you should give it a try.”

Hunk's statement left Lance with no room to question. He could see that Hunk was so sure of himself that it made Lance feel a bit warmer. He rolled his eyes and sighed as he let go of Hunk's hand.

“Fine, I'll give him a try. If it goes bad then you and I are going to marry and I'm going to enjoy your food for the rest of my life.”

Hunk chuckled and shook his head. “Even if we didn't marry, you’d still enjoy my food for the rest of your life.”

“Well, you aren't wrong.”

The conversation was followed by a few chuckles as they both started to eat. Once done, Lance started on the dishes as Hunk put away the food. Lance's chore took ten minutes, Hunk helped to dry the dishes with minimal small talk. Once done, Lance looked Hunk over once more, blue eyes asking if Hunk was really okay. When he received a warm smile in return and a small nod, Lance relaxed. He smiled softly at Hunk before leaning forward and kissing his cheek softly.

“Thanks for the advice. I should go and like, maybe reply to Matt before the night is over.”

“Or, you could watch the newest Marvel movie with me and keep him on read until tomorrow.”

Lance laughed and ran towards the couch, jumping onto it and settling himself into a corner. Pulling his legs under him, he pats the cushion, motioning for Hunk to take the spot next to him.

“Sure, he made me wait four years, I’m sure I can make him wait half a day.”

Hunk joined him on the couch as he started the movie. With nothing left to do they cuddled into each other until Lance dozed off with thoughts of him and Matt going on their first date.

The next day, Lance woke up in his bed, clothes changed to one of the sweats that he wore for sleeping. Hunk must have taken the time to change him and made sure he was tucked in after he had fallen asleep. Honestly, Hunk was too nice of a guy, he really couldn’t wait to see what type of dad he ended up being. Pushing the thoughts back, Lance groaned and stretched. He had a lot to do today, the first thing being his morning face routine, and then he had to reply back to Matt.

Spending an hour in the bathroom and then another picking out the perfect outfit. He had a plan, though it wasn't much of one, his main priority was to see if Matt had the day off. Checking his phone, Lance found that he had 2 missed calls from Pidge and 6 missed messages.

Four of the messages were from Pidge, two were from Matt.

LittleGreenMeanFightMachine WHAT THE HELL LANCE WHAT DID YOU DO?? MY BROTHER HAS BEEN FREAKING OUT FOR HOURS. Lance, can you just, message me back when you get the chance.

MattTheSpaceMan69 I’m sorry for what I have done. If you no longer want contact from me then please let me know. I will patiently wait for a response. Sorry again.

Lance read the messages and frowned. He didn’t think that leaving Matt on read for half a day would cause something like this. He had obviously made Pidge worry, not just for him but for Matt as well. Lance responded to Pidge first.

BlueLion im fine btw i didn't do anything. and you should be worried. i just found out that your brother has had a crush on me for a while. WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME!???!?! PIDGE, you knew that i had a crush on him, how could you just keep this a secret?

Lance wrote to Matt next.

BlueLion im sorry that i am just now responding to you. please know that i took some time to think about what you said and i would like to meet up if that’s okay? i think it would be good for us to talk to each other.

The response was almost immediate.

MattTheSpaceMan69 Sure! I honestly didn’t think you would respond back. Where did you want to meet?

BlueLion how about the cafe on main and charles?

MattTheSpaceMan69 Okay, would 3 be okay? I get off a bit early.

BlueLion sure! thats fine! see you at 3.

Lance smiled to himself and started to get dressed. He hoped that this was the right thing to do.

~~~~~~~

Matt didn’t get any sleep. He even called into work because he knew that he wouldn't be able to concentrate. He was worried about Lance and how he wronged him. He’s always known who Lance was, remembers him from their first meeting. He seemed so shy but was nice. He was tall with tan skin and the richest blue eyes he’d ever seen. Matt knew it was wrong to be enamored with the boy and not just because he was friends with Katie, but also because he was under the age of 18. It wasn’t his first time liking a guy, it just happened less often than it did when it came to females but Matt couldn’t act on any feelings, plus it was embarrassing to like someone younger than you, or so he thought. Over the years, his feelings for Lance grew. He often stayed hidden while Lance was over.

Matt looked over their conversation, heart aching from how much they talked. He was afraid. Matt didn't mean to lie, he just figured that if Lance knew the truth he would think he was a weirdo, which he probably does. Matt was most worried about losing Lance forever. Being left on read really hurt, causing Matt to ignore everyone. Katie tried to get him out of his room, promises of video games and shitty horror movies having no appeal. He just laid on his bed all night thinking on what he did. The worst that could come from this was Katie losing her best friend, he didn’t want to think about it.

He must have gotten a bit of sleep because the next thing he knew his phone was going off. The sound wasn’t his alarm, that much he was sure about. Finding his phone, Matt turned on the screen and saw that it was ten in the morning. He had told everyone that he was basically sick and was going to sleep the whole day away so they shouldn’t bother him, but there it was, a message from someone.

Matt wasn’t ready for the response he got. He knew he had to make this right so he replied as soon as he finished reading it.

MattTheSpaceMan69 Sure! I honestly didn’t think you would respond back. Where did you want to meet?

BlueLion how about the cafe on main and charles?

Was Lance asking him out? He knew it wasn’t a real date but the fact that Lance wanted to meet with him made him so happy. Lance had given the place, now it was Matt’s turn to give a time. Lance had chosen someplace public which was smart, now he had to pick a time that was reasonable for both parties. Since he wasn’t working today, Matt decided on three. It would give both of them enough time to get ready and to settle any nerves that might come up.

MattTheSpaceMan69 Okay, would 3 be okay? I get off a bit early.

BlueLion sure! thats fine! see you at 3.

Matt wasn’t ready for Lance to respond positively, though from what he knows of Lance and from what Katie told him, Lance is one of the sweetest people you could ever meet. It was time for Matt to get up and act his age, not like a teenager who had their first heartbreak, after all, Lance did ask to meet with him, maybe they can try and be friends.

Matt got to the cafe a whole 30 minutes early. He was nervous, anyone would be if they were meeting with their crush to discuss if there was any chance of forgiveness for being a weirdo. He sat at a table close to the door, somewhere that Lance would be able to see him with little difficulty. He sat there and played on his phone, mainly in vain as he tried to stop his heart from bursting through his chest. He was so focused on the game and trying to stay calm that he didn’t hear the bell on the door or even noticed when Lance showed up, not until there was a hand placed gently on his shoulder. Matt jumped from the touch alone, head whipping around and meeting blue eyes.

Matt was taken back, Lance looked great. He was wearing a light blue shirt tied at the over his navel, the shirt has a simple phrase and then a list. The shirt said: No Place For then followed by, Homophobia, Fascism, Sexism, Racism, Hate. It was paired with a pair of dark blue low rise jeans and some black sneakers. Matt watched as Lance smiled softly and took the seat across from him. He smiled back, the action is a small gesture to how he felt. It was quiet for a few moments before Lance decided to speak.

“Thanks for seeing me.”

Matt was taken back, why was he thanking him? He wanted to make sure that everything was okay between them and hopefully a friendship. Lance really had no reason to thank him.

“It’s not a problem, Lance. It’s my fault that we had to meet like this. I can’t apologize enough for what happened last night.”

It was Lance’s turn. The silence filled between them quickly and soon Matt was fidgeting in his seat. Matt looked down at the table just before Lance spoke.

“Matt, while it wasn’t okay for you to do something like that, I do forgive you. I talked with my roommate last night and we came to the conclusion that you didn’t do this to be mean. What were you so afraid of?”

Matt took a deep breath and tried to gather his thoughts.

“Well. At the time you were a minor. I was 21, Lance. What do you think it would look like if I let myself have a crush on you? I was scared, okay? Katie told me that I shouldn’t be, that once your 18th birthday came around I could get closer to you but by then I was stuck in my ways of hiding away and ignoring you.”

Matt watched as Lance made a face, similar to if he ate something tart.

“So, how did the whole helping me with Youtube thing happen?”

“Okay, so, the whole Youtube thing. Well, I stumbled onto your channel, like it was on the recommended feed. Honestly, I was just trying to find a reason to talk with you. I felt like if I turned into one of the normal people that commented I would get overlooked. Plus my nerdy self is automatically trying to figure out how to make things better, so helping you improve the quality of your video helped you out in the long run. I’m sorry if I led you on."

“Why the username though? Like it says your name in it. How the hell did I not figure it out?”

“Did you ever think that I would watch your videos? As for the username, I’ve always wanted to go to space but with my eyesight and having to take care of Katie, it just wasn’t a possibility.”

The table was silent again, both of them trying to figure out where the conversation goes next. Lance spoke first.

“Speaking of taking care of Pidge, is it okay for me to ask why? They came in halfway through my junior year.”

Matt bit his lower lip, eyes meeting Lance’s shortly before looking away. It’s been a few years since Katie has come to live with him, if there were any of her friends he could trust he felt like Lance was the way to go, besides, if they ever did end up dating he would learn the truth.

“When Katie came to live with me, our parents were sick. More specifically our dad. Our dad worked for NASA as a scientist, he ended up getting a brain tumor and while he was in the hospital, Mom sent Katie to live with me. She didn’t want to leave Katie alone so she got shipped off to her brothers.”

Lance's face softened and shortly after Matt felt a warm hand holding one of his own. “Oh Matt, I’m sorry to hear that. Did he make it out okay?”

Matt shook his head, a frown appearing on his face as he closed his eyes. “No. Turns out the tumor was malignant, cancerous, he lived a whole 8 months with help from the medicine but it wasn’t enough. Mom’s still alive but she doesn’t do much. We got mom a caretaker, someone to make sure she’s doing okay but she’s barely holding on. I’m afraid that we’ll only have her for a few more months”

Matt heard Lance breathe in a stuttery breath and opened his eyes to a teary-eyed Lance. Something in him broke, how come he never listens to Katie. Watching Lance trying to hold back tears while wiping at his face made him realize that she was right. He should have just been up front with Lance once he turned 18. Matt leaned forward and used his free hand to wipe away some stray tears.

“You don’t have to cry. We make sure Mom is as comfortable as she can be. We visit her every other weekend. In fact, would you mind coming to meet her? We plan to go tonight after Katie gets out of school, I was thinking that you could come with us two weeks from now?”

That stopped the tears. Lance’s eyes were wide and blinking. Matt couldn’t believe he just asked for Lance to meet his mom and it looked like Lance had that same thought. Matt watched Lance’s face darkened, a beautiful blush spreading over his cheeks as he jerked his hand away and pressed them to his face.

“D-Did you just ask me to meet your mother? Matt, we haven’t even had a first date yet!”

He laughed softly at the statement. While it was true, why couldn’t they consider this their first date? The thought passed his mind but Matt pushed it to the back of his mind.

“If you don’t want to meet her without a first date then would you do the honor of going out with me?”

Lance’s face got darker, which neither of them knew it could. “MATT! You can’t just ask me that now! There’s a process to these things, Matthew.”

Matt shied away as Lance’s voice started to get shrill. Was it a bad idea to ask so soon?

“Is that a no then?”

“No Matthew. It’s a yes but do it properly! I expect romance, showing up at my house with flowers, taking me out to a nice place, maybe a picnic in the park under the stars. Romance Matt!”

Matt laughed loudly, loud enough that people turned and watched the two. Lance ducked his head once everyone started looking, the attention is a bit overwhelming to him. Matt felt bad. He reached for Lance’s hand and held it gently.

“Will you go out with me after I get home on Sunday?”

Lance’s head shot up, eyes wide, Matt decided that surprise looked good on him. His face quickly shifted with an eyebrow quirked. He almost looked smug

“A-Are you asking me out, Matthew?”

Matt shook his head and lifted his shoulders, shrugging as he looked around, arms flailing. “Yeah? I guess? I mean, uh, fuck. Yeah. I’m not used to asking people out, I wasn’t exactly popular, y’know, so, I’m a bit awkward when it comes to this.”

Lance laughed softly and Matt swore he heard the twinkling sound of fairies. It was official, Matt would do anything to make sure that Lance stayed as happy as he was now.

“Does that mean it’s a no?”

“Oh lord, no, Matt. It’s a yes, I’ll go on a date with you. No, walk me to my car?”

Matt nodded, he couldn’t think of a better ending to their meeting.

#Matt/Lance #Latte bang #vld #Voltron: Legendary Defender #Lance #Lance McClain #Matt #Matt Holt #Pidge #Katie Holt #Hunk #sad backstory #I POSTED THIS TO THE WRONG BLOG ORIGINALLY!#unofficial-lattebang

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