#lavalampo

[interstellarsystem]

hiya, feel free to pass on this ask if its too personal but i was wondering if you told your psychologist about your system before you had an official DID diagnosis? we're not really sure we actually fit the diagnostic criteria of DID or OSDD, but we're very sure of our existence and would well, yknow, like therapy and all that lol. Just a little terrified of how it'd go telling a therapist/psychologist about our system without actually having a diagnosis ^^"

We told our psychologist before we had a diagnosis, yes. I mean, at some point, you'd have to explain your system without having a diagnosis to even get one in the first place, right?

We basically explained it to her as you'd explain it to a singlet who doesn't know what plurality is. We said that we're multiple people in a body--some here for different reasons than others, some here for no reason at all. We explained that we want to be treated as separate people when we go see her and we will tell her who is fronting when we start the session. We also explained that we're happy being multiple people even if some issues arise with it and we don't want to fuse or integrate. We got the diagnosis from our psychiatrist after explaining the same to him.

You basically need to explain what you want your psychologist to do with the information you're giving, otherwise they might assume wrong. Do you want a diagnosis? Do you want to be treated as separate people? Do you want them to ask who is fronting? All these things and more need to be mentioned as if they don't know what a system is, because chances are, unless they're a specialist, they have very little experience with systems of any kind--and even then, different systems want different things.

[a-dragons-journal]

absolutely agree with the anon that said no systems who have healthy relationships to themselves would be bothered by endos. I think the majority of sysmeds who get so riled up over *checks notes* people existing, just really hate being a system in the first place and take out their own self-hate on systems who handle plurality just fine. you dont even have to be endogenic to get sysmeds screaming at you, you just have to be happy being a system. (this post by a traumagenic system 😎)

I will politely decline to comment, since my experience with the subject is secondhand and I feel like I don't know quite enough to make that jump myself, but will post for the record.

[shadowfae]

WAit NH thinks DID is made up??? Did I read that right???

You read that right. They ‘apologized’, but only because they were sworn at by most of their followers. They were very clear they thought it was just people having imaginary friends and making things up. (I can’t comment on imaginary friends because I have not researched them in a psychiatric context, but hm.)

Reading magical history requires you to have at least a basic idea of psychology, in the same way learning herbalism requires you to be halfway to a chemist’s degree. You have to know how to match up past experiences to modern terms in order to understand what’s going on, in the same way you also have to learn sociology to see why people said the things they did, and the context they said them in.

NH proved right then and there that they had a glaringly huge hole in their research, and I’ve never quite forgiven them. But refusing to hear us out and then spewing anti-otherkin rhetoric and comparing us to fascists even when nicely corrected? That’s too far even for me.

[a-dragons-journal]

we've found that often times the people who will scream about having DNIs seldom actually read them themselves. We have a DNI that asks KFF not to interact, yet we still get kffies reblogging our stuff and tagging it as kin. 😒

it would be mostly just an annoyance except that when kffies tag one of our headmates drawings as kin, it messes him up and throws him far away from the front. so we've just taken to tagging our posts with "don't tag as kin".

Yeah, that sounds about right. (And sorry you have to deal with that.)

[shadowfae]

i poked around their blog (and still am at the moment) and wasn't able to find a post of them saying DID isn't real, though I did find a post of them calling alters "side effects of a medical/psychological condition" so that's a little. hm. (As a system ourselves we'd find it extremely offensive to be called side-effects, you feel me)

I recall them calling alters fake in particular. It wasn’t a badly-worded “Alters happen because of DID” read like “People die when they are killed”, it was an actively plural-phobic post. Hopefully you find it, when you do I’ll update my posts. I can’t hateread the same day as Drama Happening, my HER kicks in enough to drive up my adrenaline and you don’t want my heart hammering fast enough to do something weird to my body more than once in a day. ^^;

[shadowfae]

A lot of the time I've noticed that people who insist on calling themselves kin and getting defensive when people correct them often just like the title because it makes them feel special, like they're something more than they are. I highly doubt that applies to all linkers, but it's a trend I've noticed in some particular spaces and it really sucks ahsjfdj

You are so right. People are scared of the word voluntary, like choosing it means it’s fake and not meant to be or not really real or something like that. And this is something that having more ‘linking voices would absolutely help. If people see ‘linking as that fun thing that people do to help themselves and learn and not as just being thrown out of the ‘kin community, then more people will just gravitate there instead of trying to force otherkin to be what they are.

If we really did have it go around that ‘linking isn’t scary, and it is valid, and it is a good thing, then people would be more likely to go there. Before you get an avalanche, you need to make it snow. It’s just a matter of getting things started.

[shadowfae]

(I’m not on mobile so I can’t use the image feature for asks so I hope a submission works)

Apparently NH is claiming that people are sending them r*pe threats??? Unless they’re getting anon asks that they’re not posting on their blog, I see no evidence of this literally anywhere

—–

I had to reply on my main to them, but I can say considering they posted ‘proof’ of someone I’ve never seen before in my life - and I do condemn sending that sort of shit to people - that they really are painting us unfairly.

I was as nice as possible. I did not send them any harassment. I told them we got a lot of misinfo and hate. And yet they blocked me and refused to listen or ask questions.

So no, I still have no use for them.

[shadowfae]

heyo, do you know the typical tags otherkin/alterhumans tend to use when talking about otherkin, otherhearted, etc. ? i want to join in on discussion about lots of alterhuman topics, but im lowkey afraid to accidentally stumble into a tag that wishkin/kinnies tend to use. i know it's probably pretty simple, but i would really appreciate the help hgjfkd

‘otherkin’ is the tag I check daily that so far as I know, everyone uses. The alterhuman tag is either ‘alterhuman’ or ‘alth’, I would say check both for a good week or two daily until you know which one gets used more. For otherhearted, I would guess ‘otherhearted’ but I honestly don’t know.

I only check ‘otherkin’, and I do so daily. I just scroll through, block all wishkin and antishippers I see, and respond to posts I think that warrant responses. I also check the ‘saint seiya’ tag, and used to check ‘funamusea’ before I just accepted I wasn’t going to get anywhere with that. :p

Just pick a few tags you see folks use, check them daily for a week or two, and you’ll probably find out where the tags are, or at least the people that are the ‘community voices’ so to speak, and then figure out what tags they use and go from there.

Apologies that I couldn’t be of more use!