#learning empathy

[littlepawz]

What an amazing idea! 

[leighlim]

A teen film that over 35′s can watch!

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(Hopefully by this point you’ve finished all 104 minutes of 'The Edge of Seventeen’ , the kind of person who isn’t bothered by spoilers, or are just deciding if you still want to keep watching.)

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Why?

Well...I think it’s one of the rare films that doesn’t plunge itself too much into the melodrama. For someone who’s way past the adolescent stage...I’m not keen on backsliding....so films that actually pull me in....that way...wouldn’t be the ones I’d be staying to until the end.

There’s also the fact that it has been smartly written...and well cast.

What I wasn’t too crazy about: the scene in Nick’s car (I actually skipped that one ---- but if you are keen for me to watch it in detail...shoot me a DM...and I’m happy to listen to your perspective)

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HIGHLIGHT:

INT. MONA'S CAR - NIGHT

NADINE buckles herself in.

MONA How was it?

NADINE Uh...It was probably one of the worst nights...

MONA God, you wouldn't believe the night I had.

She looks at her mother.

MONA Sorry I look like hell.

NADINE closes her eyes and takes a moment to pull herself together.

NADINE What happaned?

MONA So, the dentist?

She shakes her head.

MONA I was home tonight, having a relaxing glass of wine, and I got an email from his wife.

NADINE studies her. Concerned.

MONA I was about to call Dr. Hill, but then I thought: 'No, Mona. You're going to do this on your own. You've done everything on your own since 2011. You're going to do this on your own too.'

NADINE looks out the window. Pensive, as her mother drones on.

MONA God, I feel like such a loser.

NADINE sighs and rolls her eyes.

NADINE You're not a loser.

MONA I feel like on.

NADINE You're not a loser, Mom!

She looks at her mother pointedly.

NADINE You're attractive. You're good at decorating.

MONA glances at her daughter. Not really convinced.

NADINE You're very diligent with your eyebrows.

MONA laughs tiredly.

NADINE Think about if it did work out. (Mimicks the dentist) "Hey, did you floss today? You know, gum disease is a silent killer, Mona."

MONA's eyes get a bit more sparkle as she laughs. NADINE lets out a small smile.

MONA Oh...

She grabs her daugter's hand and gives it a quick kiss.

MONA You know what I'm going to do tonight?

NADINE What?

MONA I want to go home, fix my hair, put on a beautiful face of make-up and the best dress I own.

Silence fills the car for awhile.

MONA Then take it all off and go to sleep.

Okay mother. You do you.

NADINE Fun.

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My verdict of the film: 6/10

Link to the timestamp commentary: TBA

[lonicera-caerulea]

Animal/Human relationships

    This is kind of a continuation of my last post with a more real life perspective. With the right mindset a person can learn to understand the languages and social behaviors of many types of people and cross deep social boundaries, we as a species are amazing communicators, but what is interesting to me though, and hat I will be talking about, is how learning to read the body languages of other species could potentially better enable us to understand our own species’ thinking and social cues. 

   I’m in no way the first person to realize that caring for a pet or animal helps build empathy in people, this fact has been taken advantage of by parents, schools, prisons, and therapist alike, so it’s pretty common knowledge. What interests me in this common knowledge is the question of why that is the way it is, and if some animals are better than others to use for building empathy. I personally have worked with a wide variety of domestic animals; goats, horses, dogs, cats, chickens, cattle, and rabbits, to name the ones that i can think of, and in my modest opinion, horses and rabbits (and sometimes feral cats), are the best animals for learning about oneself and growing your ability to show and feel empathy towards others and increasing your ability to catch social cues from other people. (Prey animals in general seem to be the most productive options). 

These animals are the best for this because they are the hardest to understand. Humans are predators, these animals in question are prey, therefore you cannot immediately expect them to trust or like you, therefore you have to observe them and meet them halfway. This is where empathy building comes in, you as a human have to put yourself in the perspective of a small frightened creature (or large, easily startled creature), and mentally work to modify your behavior to seem less predatory and to try to emotionally connect with them by thinking on their level. This is a challenge both for the thinking and feeling parts of your mind, and by dealing with these kinds of animals you are forcing your mind and emotions to grow and improve. One must think things like ‘how would i feel if a total stranger grabbed me and tried to pick me up?’ or ‘what would i want to do if a stranger tried to hug me?’  and with these thoughts you can analyze and predict the responses and needs of the creature you are trying to befriend. 

Now on the flip-side of this train of thought is how this applies to humans and human interactions. Well, the same skills you used to gain the trust of a totally different species is just as effective on one’s own species. Humans are more complex than the animals I mentioned above, so it is more difficult to acquire this skill by starting out with analyzing human behavior. Animals aren’t dishonest like humans are, and any action they do is easily traceable to either a feeling of fear or safety. Humans work in the same way a rabbit would in this, all emotions and reactions stem from feelings of fear or security, humans just possess a larger arsenal of reactions than a rabbit does, The important thing however is that you learn to look for it in yourself and others. You can predict the reactions of a person by understanding what they react to, what the reaction is, and which of the two basic emotions is the reaction coming from, then you can see what someone is feeling with even the subtlest of social cues. Eventually as one gets to know and experience more types of people one can inventory and catalog the different reactions from different personality types and better understand how to put yourselves in their position and then meet them halfway.

Sorry for the long rambling post

my bunny is eating my clothes