Sep 7, 2017
can’t believe im going through this again.
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Italy
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Russia
seen from Moldova
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Belgium
seen from Finland
seen from United States
seen from France
seen from Finland
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Hong Kong SAR China
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
can’t believe im going through this again.
It's Not The Leaving That's Hard ...
Most people can leave a place easily. You go on vacation, to school or work or to be with friends or family. Most of us have routine and familiarity but, point is, we can leave or change our surroundings with relative ease and do so often – usually without a care for returning. Sometimes (like on an especially luxurious vacation) we even find ourselves longing to never return – to family, friends, a job – to never have to face the idea of home again. That’s all good and well, but the real struggle, as I realize my move for college is next week, is that we can’t escape loneliness, and this might be the real struggle – combating loneliness and new challenges, not leaving for a new place. I’ll hop into a car, into a plane and into another car next week – Exhausting? Annoying? Yes. – but this event won’t take a personal toll, not on its own anyway. This action will be a symbol of the coming departure (when I say goodbye to my mom and grandma for the final time at Oberlin) and even then, that won’t be the toughest part – at least, not for me. No, I’m much more worried about my new life at Oberlin. I’ll have new academic and social and institutional pressures – they’ll be exciting and invigorating – and, most importantly, I won’t have 24/7 assistance of family members. I’ll call home and visit, sure, but there will be a stretch, probably the first few weeks, where I’ll be handling jobs and community service and school, all on my own, for the first time – all at once, it will probably feel like bruises on my morale.
I can’t wait, for any of the upcoming adventures and tasks, but I also wish I knew how to prepare myself – emotionally and practically – for the whirlwind of activity I’m about to face. New friends, new classes and new responsibilities are calling my name. Sorry this post isn't too long or expertly crafted, I just needed to voice my anxieties and my hopes (that’s what a personal blog is for, after all, right?)