Ledges: Online (chap. 3)
(Tyler Joseph x Reader)
“Y/n?”
Tyler’s lungs filled with the night air as he inhaled a breath of surprise. It’s her… how can it be her? What are the chances the random crying girl at the park would be y/n?
*you made her cry*
The voice clanged in his mind like a wretched bell, tolling over and over costing him in guilt. Tyler’s hand reached for you but he hesitated.
“Y/n- I - I’m so-“
“You’re alive”
Your voice cracked, a hairline fracture of emotion breaking over your vocal chords. He was about to apologize, he was about to plead for your forgiveness. He watches as your face crumples with relief and the tears flow from glistening eyes.
“No…” soft as a feather , his voice lifts from his lips like a wisp of curling smoke. Hands grabbing onto the edge of the bench , knuckles going white.
“Please don’t cry” his voice echoes once more. He reaches for you, and again he drops his hand.
“I thought you were-…” the words choke in your throat , mixed emotions swirling in your head. You felt relief, so much relief that Tyler was actually okay and your worst scenario thoughts didn’t come to fruition. You were happy- because this was him; This was ledges. The friend you've been confiding in , relating to, connecting with even though it was just through a screen.
No one but Emery knew about him, you didn’t have any other friends and your family didn’t know about him. He was your little secret, those conversations were between just you and him.
“I know. I’m sorry that’s not what I meant to have happen. I didn’t mean for things to go the way they did. I shouldn’t have ghosted you , I should have explained myself but I-“ he shook his head, pushing a hand through his dark hair. Eyes lifting to the inky sky freckled with stars , desperately trying to find the right words.
But it all seemed like too much, how could he explain? He would have to admit his failure. Dropping out was not something he wanted anyone knowing, the shame he felt followed him everywhere like a shadow.
*What will she think of you?*
“It’s okay” your lips lifted in a sad smile. Reaching for him you rested a hand on his arm. “You don’t have to tell me Tyler , it’s okay”
Tyler looked at you with disbelief, feeling even worse because you are being so kind about it. You should be angry with him , you should get up and storm off , delete go-it-alone and never think of him again. That’s what he’d expected , he was so sure you’d hate him.
The sound of waves kissing the shore , distant traffic, bullfrogs and crickets filled the air around you. His grip on the bench relaxed , your eyes flicked down noting the movement.
You wiped your eyes with a small laugh. Of course you cried, it never took much to make you cry ; always wearing your emotions on your sleeve. Constantly buzzing just below the surface of your skin.
Staring at each other , no one spoke. It was like you were both trying to read the other one's mind. And both minds had the same thought. Now what?
Tyler’s hoodie rose and fell softly with his breaths. It was her.
“I recognized your laugh” the words escaped his mouth before he could even hear what he’d said. His eyes went wider and you quirked a brow , head tipping minutely to one side with curiosity.
“My laugh?”
His eyes drop to his lap , tongue flicking over his lips nervously.
“The five Fyodor discount” he lifted his head and a smile had bloomed , thinking back to the first night you met. His smile was contagious, making your own lips curve. Then, with rapt Tyler watched as recollection hit and your face broke into a bright , unapologetic grin and that wonderful, bubbling laugh burst from your chest.
“Oh yeah!!”
He exhaled sharply as the sound flooded over him again. He wanted to close his eyes and bask in it-this feeling. Making you laugh made him feel so so good and he had no idea why.
*have I never made a girl laugh before?*
He could never remember caring so much about that until he met you.
“I can’t believe it’s really you”
You said, your laughter ebbing away, Tyler’s eyes moved to the tree line as though he was watching his new favorite sound retreat into the woods.
“Can I have your number?-“ he asks suddenly before adding,
“Your real number I mean, not go-it-alone”
Not taking your eyes off him, you lift your phone from your lap and hand it to him allowing him to enter in his own information. You watch as the light from your screen illuminates his face.
He’s beautiful… His hair was the color of rich hot chocolate, his eyes the same warm, cozy color. Smooth skin, lips a soft mauve color that suited his skin tone perfectly. His lashes were thick , they feathered out as he looked down at the phone completely unaware of your gaze. Even his voice was pretty, it was soft and full of smooth tones that made you think of the gentle waters in front of you ...This is ledges?
When he looks back up at you and hands you back your phone you realize your throat has gone dry. Swallowing your apparent attraction you give him a distracted smile.
“What are you doing out here y/n?” He asked this question like you were somewhere you shouldn’t be. Like the park was an abusive boyfriend that you've ran back to for the hundredth time. You look out at the dark expanse, taking a deep breath and releasing it ,you toy with the hem of your sweater. A small shrug.
“I just needed to get out of my house”
“It’s not safe here”
He replied.
“You’re here” you fired back, but there was no malice in your tone. This was a gentle conversation, you wondered if Tyler even harnessed the ability to use a harsh tone.
“It’s dark , you’re alone” he continued , he didn’t know where he was going with this but the thought of you possibly being hurt out here , an innocent girl alone in the dark-
“Not anymore,” you smiled. Honestly you hadn’t planned on staying at the park long, you just wanted to come here and cry ; then go crawl in bed and sleep. But five minutes turned into twenty and then he showed up.
Now you didn’t give any thought to going home, crawling in bed was the last thing you wanted to do. You felt wide awake now, knowing Tyler was okay and safe and not-
You shook your head , you wouldn’t allow the thought.
“You … aren’t mad at me?” Tyler asked carefully. He looked scared , as though his suggesting you might be angry would suddenly trigger some realization in you that you indeed should be.
“Of course not” you insisted , your voice strong and sure. Worried? Yes. Anxious? Yes. Did his sudden silence cause you to once again question your importance in the lives of those around you? Yes. But you weren’t angry with him… he still hasn’t explained himself , he will when he’s ready.
Tyler watched the expressions on your face shift as you were lost in thought. He wasn’t sure what to say or do.
He looked at his phone checking the time; it was nearing midnight.
“Should we walk or..” he scratches the back of his head, looking at you questioningly.
You smile and nod “sure, where should we go?”
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Twenty minutes later, the two of you were in town , right on Main Street. Walking happily , and drinking cheap hot chocolates you got from the gas station. The conversation was smooth and never dull, Tyler is so funny and easy to talk to. You felt comfortable around him, safe with him. You found yourself staring at him on multiple occasions, how is he so beautiful? He’s not at all how you pictured him and if you were being honest with yourself you felt like he was out of your league.
You probably won’t hear from him again after tonight….. enjoy it while you have it.
“They have the best pizza, have you ever been there?” Tyler’s sparkling voice pulls you from your thoughts.
“Where?” You asked slightly dazed, lifting your head , looking around you. As you walked his shoulder brushed against yours and your cheeks heated with embarrassment at how aware your senses became. Every nerve ending pinpointing to your shoulder.
“At Salvatore’s” he replied , unaware of the effect he just had on you. He nodded across the street and you shook your head.
“Never been, they haven’t been there long have they? I thought that was a wine tasting place”
Tyler shrugs, swallowing more hot chocolate.
“These shops change all the time it seems, we should go sometime” he suggests.
This surprises you “you want to see me again?” You asked quietly , eyes finding his.
He stops walking. You stop walking.
The flashing red stop light throws a crimson glow over his face, as you gaze up at him. You wondered how you looked in his eyes, it was late, your hair was probably a mess from the dry air and mild wind. You had cried earlier so your makeup was definitely smudged. Feeling like a specimen under a microscope you shifted on your feet.
“Of course.”
Was all he said, and your lips parted with a response on the tip of your tongue but then his phone rang. Both of you jolted slightly, startled by the sudden sound.
His face fell when he looked at the screen. You couldn’t fight off the curiosity that pulled your mouth into a frown. Damn that phone call for ruining your moment!
“Whats wrong - who is it?”
Tyler sighed “my ex.” And answered the call.
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