Overloaded Beneath the Vigil
AO3 link
Ships: Commandant/Lee, Commandant & Lee (Lee's and Commandant's relationship is up to interpretation.)
Tags: gn!reader, sfw, Lee:Hyperreal, Canon Compliant, Light Angst, M.I.N.D overload, Sensory Overload, Duty, Caretaking, Sleep Deprivation, Overworking, Reader-Insert, Y/N
Summary:
The Commandant fell asleep in his office again, only to be found by Lee: Hyperreal. As Lee carefully carries them to their room, he battles his own inner turmoil.
Notes:
First time posting. I've been really into Lee lately, especially after exploring his affection stories. I haven't finished the main story yet, so sorry for any inaccuracies! I based everything on his voicelines, secrets, etc.
Lee sighed. This was a common sight for him, but nonetheless a little disappointing. Was this their way of revenge on him? To make him worry by showing off that humans can also stay up for three days straight like he does?
“Commandant. I brought the documents you req–” Lee wanted to finish his sentence but was interrupted by what he saw in Y/N's office. They were asleep at their desk.
But he brushed his worries aside and walked towards their desk, placing a few papers on top of the other stacks of documents.
Lee thought that their desk was always riddled with those. “Annoying. Let them rest sometimes,” he muttered unconsciously under his breath.
He looked up at the Commandant again. His expression softened, and he leaned his head on the side of the desk. There's no hurry, he thought. With his left hand, he reached out to Y/N's hair, fiddling with it. He curled it around his fingers, analyzing how it felt and moved between his digits. A gentle smile wore on his face as he enjoyed this quiet moment. When he was about to reach out and caress the Commandant's cheek, he was startled and froze.
Lee stood behind the desk, next to the Commandant's chair, which had now become their bed. With a sigh, he crouched down next to them, but instead of his usual gentle nagging, he just stared at Y/N. He was getting sick of them overworking constantly again. His gaze shifted to the ground. Why isn't their paperwork automated at this point? We have damn constructs, yet more paperwork. Nonsense.
Lee huffed, annoyed.
“Lee… ” said the leader softly. Were they awake?
Lee stood up. He recognized that he was acting strangely and tried to recover by doing his usual routine. “Commandant..? Commandant! Are you awake?” he said very softly.
“Nghh,” only grumbling could be heard from Y/N as they shifted in their sleep.
Lee placed his hand on Y/N's back: “Commandant..?” No response. Thank god, they were still sleeping. Lee became flushed and facepalmed, screaming at himself from the inside.
“Ugh. What's wrong with me?” Lee whispered to himself. He'd never done that before. Usually, he'd quickly scoop up the Commandant and get them to bed. Tonight was an exception he didn't anticipate. Maybe he needed to recompile some of his system.
After chewing himself out, Lee lifted Y/N up bridal style. He noted how light they were compared to a few months ago. Or maybe he had just become stronger? “Either way, they should gain some weight,” Lee said to himself.
On his way to Y/N's room, he took great care to avoid any witnesses. Every night he'd keep hacking into the camera system, unnoticed. Mostly because he didn't want rumors spreading about Gray Raven's great leader. But in the back of his mind, he knew that was the perfect excuse to be more… selfish. Only he would see Y/N sleepy and vulnerable like this. Although he knew other constructs, especially Lucia and Liv, knew about this bad habit of theirs, he was the one by their side every night. It was his moment. “Everyone has their eyes on you, Commandant… ” Lee whispered as he pressed his forehead against theirs. “Just let me have this.”
Lee's M.I.N.D started to deviate. A potential M.I.N.D overload was imminent. “Shit,” cursed Lee, and he quietly placed the Commandant on the ground, leaning against the floor. He sat next to them, letting them rest on his shoulder while he waited to be overloaded for a few seconds. For some reason, he kept having these issues, especially in front of the Commandant, which he felt embarrassed about. He thought that performing multiple highly precise calculations at the same time was one of the only ways to get a M.I.N.D overload, but that wasn't the case anymore. At times, he couldn't convince himself anymore that this wouldn't cause any data errors or affect his daily work.
“Urgh…” Lee groaned, his M.I.N.D spontaneously overloading. He held his head between his hands, leaning his arms against his knees. They usually lasted only a few seconds, but every time those few seconds were excruciating. And this time he didn't have a conscious leader to rely on. “Rely… on? Urgh,” Lee groaned again, cursing his newfound weakness. He had been relying on others more, but he didn't want anyone to know about this, especially his Commandant. But their mere presence made these moments ever so slightly more bearable. Every time a M.I.N.D overload happened and they were there, he'd gain more conviction. He would keep the Commandant safe, no matter how painful these moments were.
Lee closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wall. “Ahh…” Relief. Finally. He pinched the space between his eyes, readjusting his focal length. As he came to, Y/N was still resting on his shoulder. “Hah. You could probably sleep through anything, Commandant,” Lee laughed. As if on instinct, Y/N curled up and readjusted their sleeping position. Seeing this, Lee fought back his inner voice's reactions to the sight. He felt guilty for seeing this side of Y/N. Lee gave up on checking the security cameras. He convinced himself that overchecking the cams was the cause of his M.I.N.D overload. If there were any witnesses, so be it. He leaned his head against Y/N's and closed his eyes.
“If I no longer see you here at this time one day, I'm sure it'll take me a long time to get used to it…” he confessed. To whom? Who knows. Best not to ruminate on it.
A strange feeling of comfort enveloped him as he embraced the idea that his time with them is limited. No matter how many philosophical books he read about time, everyone agreed that there's no escaping it. Life is followed by death. Destruction creates energy. “Miracles” come at a high price. If miracles did exist, he would gladly become the price for them. For they are priceless to him.
When Lee had fully accepted the stillness around the two of them, he had made a full recovery and could finish his task of tucking the Commandant into bed.
As he laid down the blanket, he stared at them a while longer. His excuse being that he was guarding them just in case they were followed. After making sure Y/N's breathing and status seemed stable, Lee leaned by the bedroom door. He closed his eyes and crossed his arms, staying like that for the rest of the night. Thirty minutes before Y/N's alarm went off, Lee left the room.
When the Commandant entered the kitchen that morning, they were greeted by Lee.
“Morning. You awake? I made too much coffee, so you can have some.” It was a blatant lie, and they both knew it. Nonetheless, Y/N chuckled as Lee lowered his head to hide his slightly flushed face. He didn't need to lie to them about such a small thing, but old habits die hard.
They enjoyed the rest of their breakfast together. The Commandant ate some breakfast as Lee gave them a briefing on tomorrow’s mission. He couldn't help but notice them spacing out instead of listening to him.
Notes:
He said jokingly: “Why do you keep staring at me? Do I have the mission brief on my face?”
Thanks for reading! Please leave your thoughts in the comments.