Apr 9, 2023
I'm sorry for being weird and off putting after locking you in my basement can we still watch a horror movie and maybe kiss a little?
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I'm sorry for being weird and off putting after locking you in my basement can we still watch a horror movie and maybe kiss a little?
It's all "I want a man who can cook" until he makes you a big heaping bowl of grunk. Then suddenly they're saying "what the fuck is this" and "why does it smell metallic" and "I'm pretty sure this a finger" like I'm sorry for being so nice and listening when you said you wanted to have a friend for dinner
What if I locked you in my basement and fed you home cooked meals of your favorite foods and cuddled you for hours every day and exchanged a combination of short and deep, long kisses and shared intimate homoerotic moments with you every day? /platonic
Me: *bites lip trying to be sexy*
Girl I'm eating out: YEEOWCH!
Is that a syringe in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Guess who's getting railed tonight 😜
Guy who tied me to the railroad tracks: okay I was going to but now you've made it weird get up we're doing this a different way
Fuck piss denial show me some scratch denial. Stick your beloved in the fuckin mosquito pit then don't let em scratch a single bite