#lennox replies

[voidwingsprime]

Starscream, can you spit like a camel?

“Yes, of course How else am I supposed to get rid of extra maw lubricant?”

On camera, Starscream’s optics slide over to Soundwave in the background. Ze is tapping at zir work station, spindly claws rhymthetically hitting the keys.

Zir data cables are plugged into it and its obvious the shorter mech is lost to zir work.

Starscream’s maw plates curl up, khyr glossa runs over khyr fangs and with a PTTOOOOOOEY!

Hot viscous fluid drips down the back of Soundwave’s helm.

Soundwave doesn’t even turn around.

Reality breaks underneath Starscream and kha shrieks as kha is bridged to primus knows elsewhere.

The camera shifts to Lennox’s eye twitching.

[voidwingsprime]

Could I request Misfire + someone waving a laser pointer?

William Lennox stares into the camera. He is Not Amused.

His face is like this.

-_-

A giant plane cat is loafing before him with kir tail fins shunting and flapping in interest as ke stares him down with wide optics.

The plane cat raises its massive paw.

A teeny laser pointer comes out of its index claw.

The plane cat waggles the red dot at Lennox’s feet.

He Does Not Chase The Laser.

The plane cat, named Misfire has kir massive ear-dishes droop. Kir facial sensory attenae drop down as well.

The laser is waggled over to a nearby “cat-tree” but for humans.

“Please??? Commander Lennox, sir???”

Lennox sighs.

He Chases The Laser Pointer.

He Climbs The Human-Tree.

The carpet texture is very soft and plush.

He slaps the laser.

Misfire cheers.

On stream, Misfire flashes a thumbs up to the Sparkling Livestream audience. Lennox looks very Not Amused as he sits on the human-tree with his cat-ear headband!

“See! Humans also like to chase laser pointers just like Seekers!!! They need enrichment just like us!!”

Lennox sighs as he wraps a blanket around himself that he found on the Human-Tree.

---

Aegis Xenobiologist Note:  Homo Sapiens, like all members of the Class Mammalia need enrichment. Most won’t admit it, but a good number of adult members of this species enjoys the act of climbing and chasing. After all, their own larval stage en-act games of chasing and their play areas have climbing infrastructure. Homo Sapiens will often risk their lives climbing geological features on their home world.

A “human-tree” is recommended for flock members that are members of this species.  Soft textures and nesting material in the “human-tree is also recommended. - Lord Dr. Starscream

[voidwingsprime]

Lennox, how did you react when you first met the Cybertronians

"That our Cybertronian population was more then some appliance bugs, Sky Lynx, and whatever monsters the bugs left here was?"

Lennox stares hard into the camera.

He facepalms.

"When the assjet woke up, kha was basically demanding answers. The lists of the dead, why khyr ship was fragged to the pits...started to demand we hand feed khyr energon..."

He rolls his eyes.

"Yeah, we shot that down real quick."

Now when we found Big Mama, Soundwave, well, we had to shut down our intra-net for a while and completely cut off access to the internet, just to make sure ze wasn't going to get into anything sensitive.

"Headaches, it was a real fucking headache, kid."

[voidwingsprime]

Lennox, describe Starscream

In the background, Starscream cackles as khyr arms bend backyards to the point that khyr wrists rest on khyr shoulders.  The other humans outside all have expressions of O_O and D:

William Lennox holds up a video camera to his face and is like

“Are you seeing this shit?! This is what I get paid to deal with! Every single damn day!”

Soundwave takes the video camera with zir data cable and then nods into the screen and turns it around so its livestreaming  Lennox rant.

“This overgrown roosterhen does this shit all day! Tries to seduce me and my wife! Gives my daughter homework help! Sends me free groceries! Pays my mortgage! And then follows me around to observe “how humans live.” “

Will is now doing bunny quotes as Starscream strides over with a smirk and very sharp pointy talons.

Kha kneels down and starts narrating into the camera with a shit-eating grin.

“And here, I, Starscream, xenobiologist of the former flock of the Nemesis is observing an aggravated human male. ”

Soundwave has a >:( emoji on zir face but thrusts the video camera into Lennox’s face.

“Luckily for him, I, Starscream, am an eminent and magnanimous provider.  So this aggravated male has nothing to worry about.”

Lennox sputters.

“Excuse me?!”

“As you can see viewers, human males pride themselves in being independent and being providers for their own families. Unused to being cared for, this male is quite upset.”

Lennox whistles in Terran Neocybex the equivalent of Fuck You.

Starscream sputters and drops the smirk.

---

(NEST Xenobiologist note: Hunter-Seekers are social mecha. With the demise of khyr flock, we are pretty sure that Starscream here has latched on to the Lennox family. Whether its healthy for khyr remains to be seen.

Note from Lennox: So you’re saying we need to find more giant nightmare machine roosters, otherwise Screamer is going to keep trying to be my sugar jet.”

NEST Xenobiologist note: ....yes.

Note from Lennox: Fuck me.

[voidwingsprime]

*the dragon sends Lennox a very lovely snack basket, with fresh fruits, smoked meats, some herbs, and... yep. those are roasted insects. some of them about the size of his hand. a note reads "I apologize for being evil over the datanet and thereby causing Starscream to make you take off your shirt on a live feed."*

Lennox grabs the snack basket and runs for it before Starscream can snag him for more human bio lessons.

He writes back a message about how Specs will pay for this and at least he has another house now. Paid for by Starscream’s bitcoin mining.