hey can we stop rbing this post, op thinks down with cis is a “hateful meme”, is super lesbophobic (ships a lesbian with a man), and made this absolute wreck of a post
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hey can we stop rbing this post, op thinks down with cis is a “hateful meme”, is super lesbophobic (ships a lesbian with a man), and made this absolute wreck of a post
So this will probably be a few messages because it's a long story so sorry if it gets confusing: I've identified as a lesbian for quite some time now, and I've come out to a few friends, but one friend, even though she took it well, she treats me kind of weird now. She seems to be pretty lesbophobic, but not openly. She doesn't call me slurs or anything, but she rolls her eyes and acts annoyed whenever I talk about any "gay stuff". (I'll call myself anon with the friend in next message)
(anon w/ the friend) The thing is, though, she’s identified as bisexual, albeit with a strong preference for men (which is totally valid. I’m not mad about that at all) Now, I was wondering how she can be so lesbophobic (there have been other instances where she’s actually said things, but not often), and still ID as bi, but then I read some stuff about internalized lesbophobia, and felt kind of bad for her. I want to help her accept herself and become more accepting of others, but (continued)
(anon w/ friend) I don’t feel comfortable around her, because aside from being lesbophobic, she’s also a low-key TERF. I don’t really know what to do here, do you have any suggestions? Thanks
A lesbophobe is no friend to a lesbian, and her being bisexual does not absolve her of her lesbophobia or transmisogyny. If you’re uncomfortable, I’d say to do what it takes to be more comfortable - spending less time around her, voicing your concerns, even cutting things off if need be. I know it sucks to lose a friend, but if she’s really a friend she’ll care about your comfort level.
-mod casey
pearl: talks to a man for .5 seconds without looking like shes in visible pain
the Hets™: look she’s in love with him!!! they’re practically canon
pearl: constantly admires rose, talks about how wonderful she is, calls their relationship “special”, literally dreams about running away with her
the Hets™: wow what good friends!
“pearl is a lesbian and shipping her with men is bad” shouldnt be such a controversial statement and yet here we are, in 2016,
At this point I just don’t care about individual lesbophobic bisexuals or biphobic lesbians. Neither group has institutional power to oppress the other, and both groups perpetuate minor problematic ideas but very rarely anything particularly serious.
So, yeah, I’m still gonna call out any fuckups people make on either side of the argument, but unless it’s obvious that they outright hate the other group, I’m not gonna chase anyone down and act like they’re the devil or something. Bisexuals are lesbophobic. Lesbians are biphobic. We might as well admit that.