#let us consider

[izutsoupmi]

now hold on i went with it just because i like it but... ax and the hatchetmen - hotel room for leberloco?

[maybeelse]

Let us consider the light drenching your brain.

Sometimes, when you are pretending to be asleep, eyes shut tight, you are disturbed by a flash of light. A sensation like a spotlight shining in through your window. (You sleep facing the wall.) A sudden burst of lightning-sharp illumination. (There is never any thunder.)

You can tell that its source is not inside you. It's a stray neutrino intruding on your synapses, a burst of spontaneous radioactive decay catching you in its beam. It's not part of you; that is a wholly different sort of light, the map of awareness that limns your expectations of what the world will be where your sense do not reach. The map that is the territory, or near enough, at least sometimes. When you're paying attention.

… it's not close at all, most of the time, these days.

Architecture shifts and slides, when you're not paying attention. Which house are you in, anyway? Who's standing next to you? Do you remember their name, their face—

No one.

No one at all.

And yet they hang there in your awareness, a shape plucked out from your blurred vision in glowing threads as delicate as a thought. Watching and waiting, because that's all they can do, that's all they are.

Waiting for you to remember who they were.

[maybeelse]

Let us consider the rot pooling inside your bones.

Not every movement hurts, these days, and nor does every stillness. Sometimes it recedes, lurking on the edge of things. Those are the good times. They never last.

You make bargains, as best you can. Let me do this, and I will give up that. Let me move freely, even if I cannot think. Sometimes these bargains work. Often the price is higher than you hoped, and you slowly learn it is best not to invite a debt.

You've been off your meds for a while now, dreading how easy it would be to get back on. A phone call, an appointment, a bit of bloodwork … but it gets harder with each passing day, as you justify your inaction, as your body starts to crumble.

And perhaps this pain is unrelated. Perhaps the icy ache in your hands is new. Not the rot slowly eating away everything you tried to be, but some external factor, viral and unpredictable. You have been sick, haven't you? Of course you have. Everyone has been sick here.

So it must be that.

Perhaps the lie will outlast you.

[subject16]

what if i just throw up and die instead? what if

[wiirocku]

Hebrews 10:24-25 (ESV) - And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.

[fbdo1986]

... polyam mystery gang

[wiirocku]

Hebrews 10:24 (NIV) - And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds,

[wiirocku]

Hebrews 10:24 (KJV) - And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works: