Xiao Nai entered his office, followed by Weiwei. She shut the door and closed the windows, only to turn around to find him crouched against the wall, his hands over his chest.
“Xiao Nai?” Weiwei didn’t hide the worry in her voice, sitting down in front of him.
“I feel like I can’t breathe.” He managed to get out, his lungs trying to suck enough air in.
“Hey, Hey, I think I know what’s happening. Do you want to hold my hands?” He shook his head, his mind racing. “Okay, Okay.” She tried to gain his attention, but didn’t touch him.
“First thing, can you name Five things you see?”
“What?” He looked at her shocked.
“Just go along with me, Five things you see?”
“I see you.”
“Good, that’s one.” Weiwei put up a finger. “Four more.”
“I see the white couch, my computer on my desk.”
“Two more.”
“My watch, and my wedding ring.” He touched the gold band.
“Four things you can feel.” Weiwei smiled, waiting patiently. She felt relieved when she noticed his hypervalenting started to slow.
“I can feel the floor, the wall on my back. The metal of the band, and the softness of my sweater.”
“Good, three things you can hear.”
“Your voice, the sound of keyboards, and the air conditioner.” At this point his breathing was almost at normal, his eyes closed and head braced against the wall.
“Two things you can smell.” Blinking his eyes open, Weiwei kept her calm, looking out his hand outstretched. She slid into his grasp, he gave it soft squeeze, finding his mind no longer racing as it was.
“Your perfume I got you for your birthday, and coffee I spilled on the carpet earlier.”
“And one thing you can taste.”
“Mint Toothpaste.” He looked at Weiwei, realizing the panic and the fear he was facing moments ago was no longer racing in his mind or making his heart race. It was still there, but manageable.
“How did you do that?” He asked.
“Er Xi gets really excited but it turns into panic during testing season. All of us learned the 5 steps to help organize her thoughts. The list helps when you focus, and using your surrounds help you realize you are safe.” Reaching out, Xiao Nai cupped her cheek. She kissed the palm of his hand, smiling.
“My wife never ceases to amaze me.” He rubbed the back, looking into her eyes. “Thank you.”
Note: The 5 steps is really helpful for people who have panic/anxiety attacks. It doesn’t work for everyone, but I highly recommend at least giving it a try. It’s something I use for my own attacks. Though it doesn’t get rid of the panic all together, it helps calm me down to the point where I no longer fear that I am in any danger and helps my mind from racing. You can also organize the list to mean whatever you want as well, it’s just another method to help with Anxiety or panic. Stay safe and lots of love!
A year in the life - levelling up a gamer in the real world
By Neil Merrett
It might be easier to understand and measure our progress in life if we could just have a nice numerical improvement system, afforded by videogames. A nice birthday might just have to serve the same purpose instead.
The concept of ‘levelling up’ mechanics in games has evolved over decades to try and give players a clear and ordered sense that they might be adapting, learning…