leviastan replied to your post “I've been scrolling your blog for over an hour thinking you did a...”
Yes yes yes. I've lost touch with a lot of people and trying to get back into the fandom has been difficult because focus on the show has shifted. Not that it's a bad thing but definitely lots of changes.
Most of my circle/ niche of the old days is gone, mostly because they’ve fallen out of love or SPN didn’t give them what they wanted or needed from the show. (I’m not judging that, there’s no point in hanging on to something that doesn’t make you happy.)
I’m finding it really hard to connect with people because I’m dreadfully shy/ anxious. I can reply to people but I can’t start any conversation (and keeping conversations going is hard too...). And I constantly feel unwelcome or obsolete for one reason or another.
Which is sad! The show itself is very good at the moment in my opinion! I’d love to chat and discuss and contribute but I’m just... lacking ways to express myself. (Also because I can’t draw or write at the moment. It’s like someone stole my artist and writer soul. There’s just nothing there.)