#lifeisbutadream

[mscudilove]

2000s

[mscudilove]

I can't believe this was me about a month or 2 pregnant with my beautiful baby girl. It can be 3 too because I'm not an OBGYN just a nurse. A real nurse RN with a BSN and 15 years of experience at the bedside. That is not counting my 2.5 years before that as a Licensed Nurse LVN or the 4 years of CNA. I have been in the medical field for about 2 decades.

I started young like 22 but before that I had already lived a college life. I ran for student trustee and won while still taking microbiology and physiology. Also transferred to Fresno State and realized as a working student and from humble beginnings I better make some money. While I could have finished with a bachelor's in Chicano Latin American studies I decided to study abroad as it was a dream. Puebla Mexico changed my life and the trajectory of the next chapter in my life.

After living out my dream life of living in another country while going to college. I made the best of friends from many places in the U.S as while as great amigos from Mexico. I would love to do it again for my master's journey. Hope I can bring my family abroad to study either in Spain, France or somewhere in Latin America. I'd love for my daughter to be immersed in Spanish or French.

10 years ago I was just growing my baby girl within me while living out my dream of finding a life partner and starting my own family. My passion for Latin America has always been something that inspires me for the next chapter. Like Ernesto Che Guevara who was a medical student that traveled from Argentina to Mexico on a journey that changed the trajectory of his life. I find that same call to help humanity and also to develop myself in medicine and help heal humans.

The fall semester will be starting soon, I feel pregnant with ideas for my project and the development of my master's in nursing. I know it will be a tough journey, but I am committed to humanity and to my dreams and myself development. Cheers to the future. Hasta La Victoria Siempre!

[mscudilove]

The End of An Era

Happy with the ending although it was sad to see Rue succumb to the worst kind of drug. One that you take trusting you will live forever feeling only euphoric for a while only you find out it's your last breath. As a writer and a lover of characters Rue wasn't my favorite but Zendaya did great in the role. My favorite character was Maddy Perez, an ambitious girl from the barrio who only dreamed of being a stay-at-home wife to a rich man.

Only that didn't happen her heart was broken time and time again by the most selfish kind of man. A boy who has been spoiled with material things but searched for validation like it was love in the most superficial things. That's exactly what his life became, empty within and filled with superficial things and accomplishments he conned people to get.

Perfect doesn't exist but we all try our best to get close to it. The main take away is the lessons we learn along the way. So it's over for the show and I am excited to see what the actors do next. Rooting for my girl Alexa Demie because she deserves so much! This week my nephew who had his own character arch accomplished his GED and graduated on stage. For a minute we doubted it, but he pulled through and we are proud. Hope he stays focused on his future and does better for himself and his posterity!

[mscudilove]

Meditations, Book 3 by Marcus Aurelius focuses on several core themes:

Urgency of time and mortality

Marcus opens by reminding himself that life is short and slipping away. He urges himself not to waste what remains on trivialities, but to live deliberately and in accordance with nature.

The value of the present moment

He emphasizes focusing only on what is in front of you — the current task, the current duty. Distraction and anticipation of the future are wastes of the rational mind.

Reason and the inner self

The ruling faculty (the hegemonikon — your rational mind) must be kept pure and undisturbed. External events, bodily pleasures, and the opinions of others should not corrupt it. Your inner self is the only thing truly yours.

Duty and service

Marcus repeatedly returns to the idea that humans are made for one another. Acting for the common good, doing your job well, and treating others justly are the highest expressions of our nature.

Indifference to externals

Fame, wealth, beauty, and even life itself are indifferent things (adiaphora). The Stoic sage loses nothing of real value when these are taken away, because virtue is the only true good.

Simplicity and the retreat inward

Rather than retreating to the countryside for peace of mind, Marcus says you can retreat into yourself at any moment. The mind is its own sanctuary.

Key quote (paraphrased): Do not waste the remainder of your life in thoughts about other people. Look inward. Keep your ruling faculty sound.

Book 3 is one of the more introspective books — shorter and more concentrated than others, with Marcus writing almost as urgent reminders to himself rather than philosophical essays.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

[mscudilove]

Inevitable Justice

Today is the last day of the month of March. Women's herstory month was the embodiment of healing and transmutation. We are womanfesting and predicting what comes next because of our intonation with the earth and her cycles. I have been initiated into something very divine, and I have felt the shift for me.

I will be having surgery on my Tio Panchos birthday and that is perfect alignment with the healing journey I will be starting. 5 years ago when we found out he had Covid, we prayed and hoped that he could pull through. That same year we would suffer our own major loss in the immediate family. Though we have no control of the outcome of any situation, we face our fears with courage and peace.

Justice is here and I want to be the healthiest to face the future that needs to be built for our children's future. This weekend I finished the finale of Paradise a show that highlights so much of our human tragedy. Though some may have sad stories that are unjust and cruel, those of us who have some say stay in tuned with our humanity to help where we can. I have also been reading a book that is a bible for human struggles Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl.

This book has taught me that finding meaning is the most important thing in this world, whether it be through dark times or great times. Seek for meaning over happiness, happiness is temporary and meaning is forever. Freedom of choice, in life we can be stripped of all things except our internal peace and how we respond to situations we might find ourselves in. Find purpose through the pain, nobody can tell you what you need to live. Only you can push through, only you can find your why.

“Those who have a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how'.” ― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning

[mscudilove]

We Can Be Heroes 💕

Just for one day. Interesting how you can see the difference between days if you’re paying attention. For some people around the world no way one day is the same but for others with many luxuries a day can be so long. This is why people get tired of the same, it’s exhausting! It’s time for changes and evolution for everyone. This is a time for renaissance. Time to dance and make art together. Fairytale time.

[mscudilove]

“There were always choices to make. Every day, every hour, offered the opportunity to make a decision, a decision which determined whether you would or would not submit to those powers which threatened to rob you of your very self, your inner freedom; which determined whether or not you become the plaything to circumstance, renouncing freedom and dignity.” ― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning

[mscudilove]

Sacred Action

It's time to bring the active energy of the cheetah into your life. This swift cat represents decisive action and intense focus. Take an honest look at the projects or situations that have-for some reason- been put on hold. Perhaps you've been wanting for a better time, unsure of what you want to focus on or even what action to take.

Let go of hesitation. Your soul longs for you to move forward on your path. Whether your goal is personal, professional, or spiritual, you have the power to manifest whatever you desire. Now is the time to resolve to pick a direction that calls to your heart, and act! Let go of your self-doubt and fear of making the wrong decision. The strength of your spirit will guide you every step of the way.

Your spirit may also take you in the more global direction of sacred activism. The light of shared consciousness between animals and humans can help you take decisive action to make the earth, and all her life-forms, a top priority. And as your loving intention expands to encompass others, it accelerates the beneficial momentum and activates blessings worldwide. In this way, you have the power to heal the earth and yourself in your actions and choices every day.

Affirmation: I focus on the options before me. I choose to take decisive action in the direction of my dreams.