LIMA LOSER? OR IS THAT (SANTANA LOPEZ)? THEY MIGHT EVEN PASS FOR (MAIA REFICCO) IN THE RIGHT LIGHT. THEY'RE (TWENTY - TWO), BUT STILL STUCK IN (LIMA HEIGHTS) AT (WHICH SCHOOL). THEY'VE BEEN CALLED THE (HELLKITE), BUT PREFER TO BE THE (SIREN). MAYBE IF THEY FIX THEIR AESTHETIC AKA (MAROON COLORED LIPSTICK LEFT ON A WHITE T-SHIRT, A WICKED SMIRK THAT NEVER FAILS SCARING OFF THE WEAK , A SEVRE COFFEE ADDICTION , A NOTEBOOK FULL OF HER WITTIEST REMARKS USED AGAINST HER PREY ) THEY'LL GET THEIR WAY. WORD ON THE SHOW CHOIR BLOGS ARE THEY'RE IN (THE TROUBLE TONES). SO GOOD LUCK TO THEM!
social media handles: normally it's bitchpez , because it sounds like bitch please , or auntiesnixx but that one is used only for her backup account that she uses to stalk people or shit post hot photos of herself to make others jealous.
PHYSICAL APPEARANCE:
height: 5'2"
build: sexy as fucking shit.
eye color: brown
hair color: brown
piercings: belly button, both helix are pierced along with her lobes and upper lobe too. oh and after a drunken night she also got her nipples pierced.
tattoos: her initials, sl, behind her ear inside the outline of a devil .
other distinguishing features: her conniving smirk , her defined abs and her killer bod.
style: baddie, but not overly showy .. loves to leave something to the imagination.
likes: dancing , smoking cigars , watching people fall down , fame , attention, singing, the color black or maroon , partying or going out clubbing , commenting on how better she is than everyone else, herself , santana lopez (that woman is a goddess) .
dislikes: annoying losers , the word moist , when someone chews with their mouth open, open mouth breathers, anyone who thinks they are better than her, children also know as demon spawns, perverts at work who think they can tip her for a happy ending, ketchup.
fears: heights and being forgotten.
skills: singing, dancing , cheerleading, being able to seduce anyone into getting her way.
quirks: nasty habit or quirk she has is that whenever she gets nervous she tends to chew on pens. it's very rare for her since she rarely gets nervous, but when she does catch her with her 'chewing pen' in mouth.
hobbies: bullying others to show her superiority and making them cry, math (but don't call her a nerd) .
music tastes: she's a huge fan of amy winehouse and that sort of smooth r&b mixed with jazz, anything that she can dance to at the club or make her feel like the empowered bitch she is. whitney houston is also on repeat for her or anything by renee rapp and kehlani. she's also a bit of a swiftie however don't ever catch her admitting that she is to anyone.
myers-briggs: estp
kinsey scale: 6 , only straight santana is , is a straight up bitch.
strengths: her harsh words , thick skin and being hot as fuck.
weaknesses: being a tad over sensitive and not being able to take what she dishes out to everyone.
LIMA LOSER? OR IS THAT SPENCER PORTER? THEY MIGHT EVEN PASS FOR NUNO GALLEGO IN THE RIGHT LIGHT. THEY'RE 20, BUT STILL STUCK IN LIMA AT WILLIAM MCKINLEY UNIVERSITY. THEY'VE BEEN CALLED THE POST-MODERN GAY, BUT PREFER TO BE THE MVP. MAYBE IF THEY FIX THEIR AESTHETIC AKA GRASS STAINS ON AN OLD PAIR OF JEANS, PURPOSEFULLY RUINING A NICE MOMENT WITH A HAND-MADE FART SOUND, & ACTING UNBOTHERED WHILE SECRETLY PINING THEY'LL GET THEIR WAY. WORD ON THE SHOW CHOIR BLOGS ARE THEY'RE IN NEW DIRECTIONS. SO GOOD LUCK TO THEM!
THE BASICS:
name: spencer austin porter
nicknames: spence
pronouns: he/him
gender: cis man
birthday/zodiac: august 12th, leo
birthplace: st. louis, missouri
relationship status: single
sexuality: homosexual
occupation: college student
sports/clubs: baseball team (pitcher), football team (running back), fight club
Lima loser? Or is that MARLEY ROSE? They might even pass for NICOLE WALLACE in the right light. They're TWENTY-ONE, but still stuck in LIMA at MCKINLEY. They've been called the WALLFLOWER, but prefer to be the SONGWRITER. Maybe if they fix their aesthetic aka BECOMING THE IDEAL AND LOSING HERSELF IN THE PROCESS, SLIDING ACROSS WOOD FLOORS IN FUZZY SOCKS AND THE FLUTTER OF A BUTTERFLY’S WINGS they'll get their way. Word on the show choir blogs are they're in NEW DIRECTIONS. So good luck to them!
THE BASICS:
name: marley rose
nicknames: marls
pronouns: she/her
gender: ciswoman
birthday/zodiac: february 2nd, aquarius
birthplace: lexington, ky
relationship status: single
sexuality: bi-sexual
occupation: part time waitress at breadstix and part time bowling attendant at lima bowling
sports/clubs: film, photography, new directions, volleyball
major/minor: music theory and composition
languages: english, spanish, french, american sign language
social media handles: marlsrose (on all social media)
PHYSICAL APPEARANCE:
height: 5ft 5in.
build: athletic.
eye color: blue.
hair color: between strawberry blonde and brunette.
piercings: two in each ear.
tattoos: small rose on her ribs.
other distinguishing features: freckles sprinkled across her nose and cheeks. mole on the right side of nose.
style: causal and very girly. sundresses, jean shorts, oversized t-shirts, bad tees.
PERSONALITY/INTERESTS:
traits: attentive listening, loyalty, making anyone feel welcome
likes: the color pastel pink, the smell of lavender and lemon, singing in the shower, dancing in the rain, cheesy romance movies
dislikes: the smell of vanilla candles, the way her body feels after working out, the sounds of someone chewing
fears: the ocean, gaining weight, losing her mother, never experiencing love
skills: songwriting, volleyball
quirks: laughing at her own jokes, telling cheesy jokes she finds from popsicle sticks
hobbies: writing songs, taking photographs around town, watching the day turn into night.
music tastes: taylor swift, olivia rodrigo, sabrina carpenter, maisie peters, tate mcrae, benson boone, zach bryan, post malone
myers-briggs: ISFP.
kinsey scale: 2; heterosexual with more than incidental homosexual tendencies.
strengths: volleyball skills, singing abilities, attention to detail
weaknesses: taking what people say to heart, not being able to stand up for herself, giving herself to people that don’t deserve her
lima loser? or is that kurt hummel? they might even pass for troye sivan in the right light. they’re 22, but still stuck in lima at william mckinley university. they’ve been called porcelain, but prefer to be the fashionista. maybe if they fix their aesthetic aka hippopotamus brooches, caramel mochas, and early morning walks they’ll get their way. word on the show choir blogs are they’re in new directions. so good luck to them!
🎵You, you got your own opinions. But baby, I don't even need to hear 'em. It used to hurt me, used to bring me down. Do your worst, 'cause nothing's gonna stop me now. Don't let those losers take your magic, baby, yeah. 🎶 (let 'em talk by kesha plays automatically when you go on brittany's blog)
LIMA LOSER? OR IS THAT BRITTANY PIERCE? THEY MIGHT EVEN PASS FOR HUNTER SCHAFER IN THE RIGHT LIGHT. THEY'RE TWENTY-TWO, BUT STILL STUCK IN LIMA AT MCKINLEY. THEY'VE BEEN CALLED THE BLONDE AIRHEAD, BUT PREFER TO BE THE UNICORN. MAYBE IF THEY FIX THEIR AESTHETIC AKA LONG MOMENTS DANCING WITHOUT A CARE WITH THE MUSIC BLARING, GOSSIPING ON ALL THE DIRT OVER A TOO HOT POT OF CHEESE, AND GETTING SWEATY OUT ON THE FIELD IN A TOO SHORT SKIRT AND THE ROLLER RINK WITH THE GIRLS ON SKATES THEY'LL GET THEIR WAY. WORD ON THE SHOW CHOIR BLOGS ARE THEY'RE IN THE TROUBLETONES. SO GOOD LUCK TO THEM!
THE BASICS:
name: brittany susan pierce aka brittany s.pierce.
nicknames: britt, b, bee, britt-britt.
pronouns: she/her. NOT IT, NOT HE/HIM. thank you.
gender: 🏳️⚧️ ♀️
birthday/zodiac: march 14th, pisces.
birthplace: lima, oh.
relationship status: single, but i've kissed just about every member of the senior and junior classes at mckinley.
sexuality: bisexual.
occupation: host of fondue for two.
sports/clubs: cheerios, dance, the muckraker, gay/straight alliance, mathletes. also it's not at school, but! i play on the local roller derby team here in lima, we're called the pinup punks. my name there is pierce the blade, i'm the jammer. i also play the drums in a band called high road.
major/minor: journalism and media communication.
languages: english, spanish, asl, and a language i invented in middle school!
social media handles: fonduefortwo professionally everywhere, fondueforbritt everywhere else for my friends.
PHYSICAL APPEARANCE:
height: 5'10'’.
build: ⌛️
eye color: blue.
hair color: blonde, sometimes i clip in fun colors when i'm not in cheerio mode though.
piercings: i have a lot! four on each ear, three on my lobes and one a helix and on the other an industrial. i also have my tongue, nipples, and belly button pierced.
tattoos: i have a rainbow on my wrist, a unicorn on my lower back and a small ufo on my shoulder. a portrait of my amazing feline friend lord tubbington. (someone who is Not brittany typed that in and later brittany removed it)
other distinguishing features: good tits and a big heart.
style: carefree and fun colors when i'm not in my cheer uniform. i love everything from bold patterns to simple ones.
PERSONALITY/INTERESTS:
traits: i like to think i’m loyal and creative, funny, friendly and pretty adventurous. but i know some people think i’m kind of stubborn and impulsive, probably naive and aloof too. also dumb or an airhead.
likes: to dance, fondue, my cats and the cats at love meow, art, math, performing, taking baths.
dislikes: bullies, being called stupid, ignorant people, conflict, injustice, feeling lonely.
fears: not being good enough or being hurt simply for being who i am.
skills: i can get out of handcuffs easily, bend pretty much my whole body, can put my feet over my head, do complicated math in my head, super good at reading peoples signs and i'm probably a lil psychic.
quirks: super bendy and flexible, does that count? double jointed, i can talk very fast, i do “voice overs”... mostly in my head.
hobbies: drawing, dancing, cheering, interviewing people, listening to true crime podcasts and alien/cryptid conspiracy theories, rollerskating, motocross.
music tastes: anything by kesha and beyonce, but also anything that i can dance to. ♪♫♬
myers-briggs: i did this because it was fun, but i can't remember i think it started with an e?
kinsey scale: 3, i'm equal opportunities.
strengths: i'm majorly talented, especially when it comes to dancing. i think people are surprised by how much i can lift too.. i also got like... an iron stomach, at least that's what my parents tell me. and despite what some people think, i'm pretty smart.
weaknesses: i get lost super easily.
She's the one they made me talk to when they found out I was keeping that bird in my locker.
🎵I'm gonna trade this life for fortune and fame, I'd even cut my hair and change my name. 🎶 (rockstar by nickelback plays automatically when you go on brett's blog)
LIMA LOSER? OR IS THAT BRETT BUKOWSKI? THEY MIGHT EVEN PASS FOR CALEB LANDRY JONES IN THE RIGHT LIGHT. THEY'RE TWENTY-ONE, BUT STILL STUCK IN LIMA AT MCKINLEY. THEY'VE BEEN CALLED THE BURNOUT DEALER, BUT PREFER TO BE THE ROCKSTAR. MAYBE IF THEY FIX THEIR AESTHETIC AKA BREAK UPS AND MAKE UPS WITH HIS LONG TIME GIRLFRIEND, HAZY NIGHTS SPENT IN THE WRONG PAIR OF ARMS, AND SCREAMING ON STAGE TO LONELY SOULS IN A CROWD THEY'LL GET THEIR WAY. WORD ON THE SHOW CHOIR BLOGS ARE THEY'RE… NOT IN ANY GLEE CLUB???? SO GOOD LUCK TO THEM!
THE BASICS:
name: brett bogumil bukowski.
nicknames: stoner brett, bukowsk, babe, triple b.
pronouns: he/they. though tbh i don’t really care?
gender: genderfluid, i guess.
birthday/zodiac: june 27th, that makes me a cancer.
birthplace: lima, oh born and raised.
relationship status: single on a bad day. taken on a good day.
sexuality: bisexual?? idk man. everyone’s hot.
occupation: frontman for the band high road. drug dealer.
sports/clubs: art club, astronomy club, ceramics, cooking club, drama club, environment club, painting club, international/foreign language club, photography club, digital media club, the muckracker, gay/straight alliance, improv club.
major/minor: art, ceramics.
languages: english, ASL, spanish, russian, polish, japanese, and french. i’m learning german and i want to learn chinese.
social media handles: brett42069 everywhere.
PHYSICAL APPEARANCE:
height: 5‘10’’ i’m not going to front.
build: slim?? imagine if i had a sleeper build though.
eye color: blue.
hair color: ginger baby.
piercings: i got 00 gauges, yo.
tattoos: man, i got too many probably. i got a pot leaf, stars, sparkles, a disco ball, a fish, a pair of glasses, some books and anime panels… and i did most of them myself, with a tattoo gun or with the trusty ol’ stick and poke method.
other distinguishing features: i got freckles literally everywhere?
style: you know that tiktok look that’s like… adam sandler? it’s like that but more punk clothes.
PERSONALITY/INTERESTS:
traits: well… i asked sam and he said empathetic, artistic, funny, supportive, upbeat, lazy, careless, gossipy, and greedy...
likes: drugs, weed especially, video games, midnight drives, magic, money, rapping, dottie and jacob.
dislikes: people harshing my vibes, assholes, bullies, people who don’t pass and filthy bongs.
fears: going to prison.
skills: apparently i scream pretty decent and i know how to play the guitar, i’m trying to learn the piano. i know a bunch of different languages and my memory is like… super good unless i fuck it up with drugs, which i do kinda, but still. i can remember fun facts. i’m a super good cook and i’m good with locks. i’m also a magician and i can go so hard at the knife game.
quirks: i bite my nails a lot and my lips, i guess i have like an oral fixation?? people say i talk in my sleep, which i can do practically anywhere. and i guess i fidget and play with my hair a lot too?
hobbies: making music, painting, photography, learning languages, stargazing, getting high with my best friend, giving my gf flowers.
music tastes: i like it all, man. why only listen to one genre? ♪♫♬
myers-briggs: who is that?
kinsey scale: is that a type of drug scale?
strengths: i can lift a lot, not as much as one of the dudes on the titans, but still.
🎵 Sometimes I feel like everybody is a sexy baby and I'm a monster on the hill. Too big to hang out, slowly lurching toward your favorite city. Pierced through the heart, but never killed 🎶 (anti-hero by taylor swift plays automatically when you go on sam's blog)
LIMA LOSER? OR IS THAT SAM EVANS? THEY MIGHT EVEN PASS FOR NICHOLAS GALITZINE IN THE RIGHT LIGHT. THEY'RE TWENTY-ONE, BUT STILL STUCK IN LIMA AT MCKINLEY. THEY'VE BEEN CALLED THE CROWD PLEASURE, BUT PREFER TO BE THE NEXT BIG THING. MAYBE IF THEY FIX THEIR AESTHETIC AKA LONG NIGHTS SPENT UNDER THE STARS ON A BLANKET IN THE BACK OF A PICK UP, UNDER THE BRIGHT NEON LIGHTS WITH A CAMERA ROLLING TO A SLOW SMOOTH SOUNDTRACK, AND LONG DISTANT CALLS HOME TO A DEEPLY MISSED FAMILY THEY'LL GET THEIR WAY. WORD ON THE SHOW CHOIR BLOGS ARE THEY'RE IN NEW DIRECTIONS. SO GOOD LUCK TO THEM!
THE BASICS:
name: samuel jessica evans.
nicknames: sammy, white chocolate, trouty mouth, blond chameleon or captain trouty.
pronouns: he/him.
gender: cismale.
birthday/zodiac: may 21, gemini.
birthplace: knoxville, tn!
relationship status: single.
sexuality: pansexual, like deadpool.
occupation: “accountant” and part time exotic dancer, also an ex-model. you might've seen my junk looking as big as a car on the side of a bus in new york a couple of years ago.
sports/clubs: art club, astronomy club, digital media club, drama club, fight club, film club, gay-straight alliance, god squad, improv club, painting club, photography club. i'm also on the football team, go titans! and the swim and synchronized swim teams.
major/minor: digital media and visual communications!
languages: english, ASL, na'vi, very poor spanish.
social media handles: blondchameleon everywhere and uh, ifykyk about my other ones.
PHYSICAL APPEARANCE:
height: 6'0''.
build: athletic??? and my abs can cut glass, absolutely ab-ulous!
eye color: hazel.
hair color: blond and i don't dye it.
piercings: oh man, i got my nipples, tongue and ears pierced... but like, think teddy altman from marvel not grey's anatomy. but also specifically in his earth-616 era.
tattoos: i have a firefly quote on my forearm, i'm fine on my inner elbow, i'm just starting a sleeve of comics and anime panels on my right arm and left leg, respectively.
other distinguishing features: i got some birthmarks on my face?
style: homeless man, 12 year old boy, and a hooker!
PERSONALITY/INTERESTS:
traits: pretty much anything that fits a hufflepuff, so like loyal and creative, optimistic and i think i'm pretty funny and charming! i uh, might also be kinda stubborn and impulsive, according to my therapist.
likes: space, comic books, anime, chapstick, mountain dew and cool ranch doritos, avatar, star wars, lord of the rings, you know that kinda stuff.
dislikes: rude people (but i ain't hannibal okay), onions, pickles, losing, politics, math.
fears: being homless again or losing my friends and family.
skills: i can play the guitar and i can hold my breath for like five minutes underwater. i can fit my whole fist in my mouth too! i'm also pretty good at tying knots.
quirks: i bite my nails and talk in my sleep??? if i'm stressed out i also sleep walk?? i also do that thing people hate where i jiggle my leg when i'm nervous.
hobbies: doing impressions, playing sports and video games, i used to model a lot more than i do, but i think i like taking pictures more, playing the guitar and bass, especially for high road. i also dabble in paint and i love stargazing.
music tastes: ♪♫♬ listen... i like a lot of different stuff and some was just for work, but you can't hear something for so long and not enjoy it too. ♪♫♬
myers-briggs: it started with an e and ended with t? i think?
kinsey scale: it's a solid three, i know 'cause they taught me at pride a couple of years ago.
strengths: if you've seen me in the gym, you know. also i'm really working on my singing 'cause if i want to voice something on disney, i know i'm going to have to sing.
weaknesses: math. fuck math, fr.
My personality is like a radioactive asteroid, spend too much time with it and it could kill you.
LIMA LOSER? OR IS THAT SEBASTIAN SMYTHE? THEY MIGHT EVEN PASS FOR HERMAN TOMMERAAS IN THE RIGHT LIGHT. THEY'RE 22, BUT STILL STUCK IN WESTERVILLE AT DALTON. THEY'VE BEEN CALLED THE TEMPEST, BUT PREFER TO BE THE NATURAL BORN LEADER. MAYBE IF THEY FIX THEIR AESTHETIC AKA DRIVING HOURS FOR YOUR PERFECT COFFEE ORDER, FLICKING CIGARETTE BUDS OUT ON THE ASTRO-TURF AT THE COUNTRY CLUB, DANCING AND DRINKING YOUR FEARS AWAY & USING THE PERFUME SAMPLES IN MAGAZINES TO WIPE YOUR TEARS THEY'LL GET THEIR WAY. WORD ON THE SHOW CHOIR BLOGS ARE THEY'RE IN THE WARBLERS. SO GOOD LUCK TO THEM!
want to know more? well, ur in the right place ↓
THE BASICS:
name: sebastian anton smythe
nicknames: seb, bash, cunt (both affectionate & derogatory)
pronouns: he/him
gender: cis male
birthday/zodiac: twenty two, july 25th - making me a gemini making me a leo.
birthplace: westerville, oh
relationship status: single
sexuality: gay aromantic
occupation: i don't do that <3
sports/clubs: warbler and co-captain of the dalton lacrosse team
major/minor: a junior majoring in arts management
languages: english, french, a little japanese.
social media handles: @smythedotcom on everything
PHYSICAL APPEARANCE:
height: 5'10
build: slim athletic
eye color: hazel
hair color: light brown
piercings: ear lobes
tattoos: the words 'tell me i'm your national anthem' from lana del rey's national anthem on my lower back. my favorite song,
other distinguishing features: a shit-eating smirk and oodles of charisma!
likes: trashy early 2000’s clothes & music, starting twitter drama, reading people their horoscopes from teen magazines, iced oat lattes, one-upping people, explaining the lore of degrassi; the next generation (i was diagnosed with ADHD, and my insane degrassi knowledge is the lingering remains of a six year long hyperfixation. i've now put all of his pent-up energy into glee), showing off my backflip to people.
dislikes: fake-deep music and poetry, desaturated colors, snitches, boring romantic period pieces (where's the sex????), people who underestimate me, the texture of velvet, being told that i'm 'too much', staying in on a friday night.
fears: elevators & loneliness
skills: piano, music, the remains of the gymnastics classes i took in middle school, drinking everyone under the table.
quirks: i'm a self-confessed cheek biter. the amount of times i've nearly taken a chunk out of the inside of my own face, just call me hannibal lecter.
hobbies: rewatching degrassi, taking online 'which ___ are you' buzzfeed quizzes, taking gym selfies while not doing a whole lot at the gym beyond a treadmill strut, scheming & deviously planning
music tastes: just listen to it yourself here
myers-briggs: entp
kinsey scale: 6. gay as you like.
strengths: my leadership, my extremely attractive body and face - great for seduction, and also that backflip i mentioned before.
weaknesses: not so good at person-to-person communication.
