HEY Y’ALL I AM BACK!!! WITH A PATRON SAINT DRABBLE!!
Y’all can thank @linguinereid for this one!! Sweet Bee suggested this and I ended up writing part of it while I was in line for rides at Epcot.
I’m excited to be writing and posting again!! Please tell me what y’all think of this one, and tell me what I’ve missed in the past couple of weeks!!
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Emily poked at her ear, trying to twist around to get a better look in the mirror. “Shit,” she mumbled, wincing as she prodded a sore spot. She leaned across the bathroom counter, almost sitting in the sink. “I think I fucked up. Shit.”
“That looks infected.”
She jumped in surprise and fell off the counter, hitting the faucet on her way down and splashing water across her shirt. “What the fuck!” she exclaimed. Spencer stood in the bathroom doorway, head tilted and eyes wide like a very small owl. “You little gremlin, you scared the shit out of me! What are you doing in here?”
“You left the door open,” Spencer said. “What’s wrong with your ear?”
She fumbled to turn off the faucet and pick up Hotch’s knocked-over toothbrush. “Nothing.”
“It’s red and swollen,” he said. “That’s a sign of infection. What did you do?” His eyes went wide. “Did you get that piercing after Hotch told you it was a bad idea?”
She smoothed her hair down over her ear. “Nope,” she said. “Why would you think that?”
“I heard you guys arguing about it,” he said. “Hotch said it was against dress code, and you said you didn’t give two fucks about dress code, and he said you were shit at cleaning the piercings you already have and you’d fuck up your ears, and you said-”
“Okay, okay, you and your eidetic memory can stop at literally any time,” Emily said, rolling her eyes. “It’s not that big a deal. There was a girl at the party last weekend who said she’d pierced like everybody’s ears at camp last summer, and she’d always wanted to try an industrial, and-” She paused. “Why am I explaining myself to you? You’re ten.”
“Nine.”
“Close enough. Why are you here, anyway?”
Spencer shifted his weight. “I have to pee,” he said.
“All right, I’ll get out,” Emily said. “But not a word to Hotch, understand? Not a single word. He cannot know about this. You know how smug he gets when he right about something.”
“Is he right, though?” Spencer said. “Did you fuck up your ear?”
“Okay, no swearing either, Alex will murder me if you pick up on me swearing,” Emily said. She stepped out of the bathroom and gave Spencer a little push inside. “Seriously, though. Don’t tell Alex either. You know she’ll be pissed at me too. I’ll- I’ll buy you that Star Wars lego set you want as long as you keep your mouth shut.”
Spencer brightened. “The Millennium Falcon?” he said.
“Sure, sure, why not, just keep your mouth shut!”
She closed the bathroom door and went back down the hall to the common room. It was Derek’s week to pick for movie night; he was having a great time with whatever Will Ferrell comedy he’d chosen, but Hotch was focused on his homework and Alex was reading a book. Emily sat down in her usual spot, tucking her legs underneath her. Her ear was still burning, but she brushed her hair over it surreptitiously. She could keep it a secret, as long as Spencer did. It would be fine.
By Tuesday, she realized it was not fine.
Her ear continued to swell and throb, the skin red and stretched tight around the barbell in the cartilage. She’d had to actually style her hair every morning instead of throwing it up in a messy ponytail or bun, or asking JJ or Alex to braid it for her. It wouldn’t take long for Alex to catch if she kept this up- she was famous for rolling out of bed at the last minute, getting up early to do her hair was drastically out of character. But she wasn’t sure who to be more afraid of catching her, Hotch or Alex.
She sat down at their usual table in the dining hall and pulled her hair back behind her ear, hissing when her nails brushed the irritated skin. “Oh, fuck,” she mumbled under her breath. It wasn’t good. It really wasn’t good.
Spencer climbed up on the chair beside her. “Are you doing okay?” he asked.
She sighed heavily. “How bad does it look?” she asked.
Spencer knelt on the chair so he could lean his elbows on the table. “Pretty bad,” he said. “Ew, is it oozing? I think it’s oozing.” He wrinkled his nose. “You should tell somebody.”
“Like hell I will,” she said, pulling her hair back into place. “This is a hill I will die on.” She paused. “This...this won’t kill me, will it? I won’t actually die on this hill?”
“Probably not, but infection was one of the leading causes of death during the Civil War,” he shrugged. “Try rinsing with saltwater, that might help.”
“Really?”
“Couldn’t hurt. I mean, in a manner of speaking. It’ll probably hurt a lot.”
Emily blinked. “That wasn’t reassuring, babe,” she said.
Hotch walked over to them and set his tray down. “What are you two talking about?” he asked as he sat down and cracked the top of his yellow Red Bull.
“Nothing,” Emily said quickly, dropping her fork in an effort to pick it up fast.
Alex set a glass of milk down on Spencer’s tray. “Sit on your butt or you’re going to fall on the floor again,” she said.
Spencer tilted his head back to look up at her. “I wanted chocolate milk,” he objected.
“Plain first, darling,” she said, bending to kiss his forehead. “Now sit down before you fall out of your chair.” Spencer obeyed, sliding down from his knees to sit down.
Emily poked her fork around in her scrambled eggs. They were way too yellow and a little watery around the edges, and her stomach turned. “Emily, are you okay?” Hotch asked.
“Yeah, fine, why do you ask?”
He gestured towards her tray with his Red Bull can. “I don’t think I’ve seen you eat anything since you came back from the party on Friday night,” he said. “Are you still sulking because I told you not to pierce your ear?”
“I don’t sulk,” Emily scoffed.
“Yes, you do,” Hotch said. “You’re pissed because you know I’m right, and it would be a terrible idea to get an industrial. Especially since you don’t have a guardian over eighteen to sign off on it, so it’d be illegal.”
Emily stabbed her fork into the eggs. “I’m fine and I’m not sulking,” she said. “But you’re wrong. I’ll be fine if I get my ear pierced.”
She met Spencer’s gaze. His hazel eyes were wide, glancing over first at Hotch and then at Alex, but he kept his mouth shut. Her ear throbbed, but she wasn’t going to give anyone the satisfaction of knowing they were right.
By Friday, she knew they were right, and she hated it, but damn, her ear hurt.
She huddled in the corner of the library sofa, her history textbook open on her lap but long forgotten. Her ear was an ever-present pain now, too sensitive to touch, and oozing something disgusting.
The library was quiet and peaceful, rain tapping steadily on the window. James was sorting through his anatomy flashcards while Dave pretended to write a paper while he was really working on the novel he claimed he wasn’t writing. Spencer was lying on his tummy on the floor, absorbed in a book far above his grade level. The rest of the kids were at clubs or practices, and Alex passed by in her own paths as she shelved books and answered questions.
She glanced up to see Spencer watching her poke at her ear; she dropped her hand and glared at him. “Don’t say anything,” she said to him sharply in Russian. “Remember the Millennium Falcon.”
He sighed heavily. “Your ear looks really bad,” he said. His Russian wasn’t as strong as his Italian, and his accent was terrible, but at least James and Dave wouldn’t understand them.
“Not a word!” she said.
Alex plunked down on the opposite side of the couch, jostling Emily and making her scowl. “I’m taking a break,” she sighed. “The sophomores are working on their poetry projects and I don’t want to discuss Ezra Pound anymore.”
Spencer pushed himself up from the floor. “Alex?” he said. “Can I ask you something?”
“Of course, dearest,” she said, taking his hands in hers. “What’s up?”
“If I told you I wanted to do something and you said no, and I did it anyway, would you be mad at me?” he asked.
Emily shot him a dirty look, but he ignored her. “Well, I might be a bit disappointed, but I don’t think I’d be mad,” Alex said, squeezing his hands.
“If I did the thing anyway, and I ended up getting hurt, would you be mad at me?” he asked.
“No, I wouldn’t,” Alex said, drawing him onto her lap.
“And you wouldn’t tell me you told me so? And you’d help me?” he continued.
She frowned, clearly concerned over this line of conversation, and hugged him. “Of course I’d help you, baby,” she said. She stroked his hair away from his forehead. “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”
Spencer leaned around Alex’s shoulder to make direct eye contact with Emily. She sighed heavily. “So...you know how I wanted to get an industrial piercing, and you and Hotch said it would be a bad idea?” she said hesitantly.
Alex’s eyes narrowed. “Yes,” she said. “Why?” Emily tucked her hair slowly behind her ear. “Emily, holy shit!”
“It’s pretty bad, huh?” Emily said glumly.
Alex moved Spencer hastily off her lap and leaned over Emily to take a better look at her ear. “Oh my god,” she said. “James, can you come take a look at this?”
James pulled his headphones off. “Hm?” he said. “Oh shit! Emily, what did you do?”
She submitted reluctantly to his poking and prodding. “So a girl at the party last week offered to pierce my ear,” she said. “And it...kind of went wrong.”
“That looks like it hurts,” Alex said, smoothing her hair. “It looks super infected.”
“Yeah, that’s the medical term for it,” James said. “Holy shit, Prentiss, I can’t believe you pulled a Parent Trap.”
“A Parent Trap?”
“Yeah, when Hallie pierces Annie’s ear with a sewing needle, an apple, and...you know what, never mind.”
Emily winced as the earring shifted. “Can you just...make Hotch promise that he won’t say I told you so?” she said.
“I think he’ll agree that you’ve suffered enough,” Alex reassured her.
Spencer hovered at her elbow. “I would have said something sooner, but Emily said she’d buy me the Millennium Falcon set,” he said.
“Please don’t scold me for bribing the baby, either,” Emily said.
my beautiful little bee!! i have been in awe of you since the very first day i followed you. i still continue to be in awe of you every single day because you surprise me every day. i never know what to expect from you and I LOVE THAT. i love that you accept me and my weird ways too. you’re so incredibly talented, i genuinely don’t think you understand how otherworldly your mind is. you are a magical being and i am lucky to just exist in your world. you have taught me so much and i have gained so much from knowing you and i hope you never stop surprising me.
this is my reid hot take that i include as much as i can in fics mans would totally nuzzle into any touch, whether someone’s tucking a blanket around him or brushing the hair from his face like homeboys skin is gonna meet skin one way or another. that sounded so weird but im not gonna edit it hehe.
yes!! he lives for the smallest touches, accidental or not.. like when brushing his hair away, he’ll just close his eyes and smile because it feels like he’s being watched and cared for in some way 🥺
this is so niche, but would you do a sticker with soles redire et occidere possunt on them.
i would love to!! anyway you could explain the overall vibe for the sticker? i know that sounds like a weird question but just want to make sure it looks good :)
coming to the queen of the alex blake stans for guidance. do you happen to know what year ethan died? was it before or after ameri-thrax?
bee. you wonderful angel. I adore you.
this is an excellent question!!! it’s never really stated but I have hypotheses!!
she worked the Unabomber case in 1996, and Amerithrax was in 2001. And she was twenty-four when she started with the FBI (she set the record until Spencer broke it at twenty-two). so she was there for quite a while. She might have been like JJ and had Ethan during her career, but she probably wasn’t able to maintain her job with the FBI while also caring for a critically ill child.
my thought process is that Alex quit the bureau after Strauss screwed over her career after Amerithrax, and that’s when she and James decided they could try for a baby. So she had Ethan in 2002, so he passed away in 2011, and she joined the BAU in 2013.
omg going off the other ask- when i got a concussion there were parts of the cognitive that were really easy, like saying the months of the year in reverse, but there was a part where they spoke five numbers and told me to repeat them backwards and i just couldn’t organise my thoughts enough to do it. imagine spencer getting a concussion and not being able to do part of the cognitive. he’d put all of his self worth in his intelligence and... omg poor little dove :(
oh my my heart just did that little squeezy thing :( :( :(
that would be so upsetting already with canon!Spencer. he for sure bases his self worth on his intelligence, and the idea that he can’t function correctly would completely derail him.
tiny Patron Saint Spencer would be a disaster. a tiny ten year old whose emotions are too big for his body? the hottest of hot messes.
