I remember laying beside him all those nights. Enjoying his company, his presence. Loving the moments I could hear his laugh. Treasuring the moments I knew he could sleep peacefully for awhile. Months of this simple loving friendship. And then I remember the first night he kissed me. How afraid and nervous I was. How badly I wanted him, how gently I wanted him. I remember slowly melting into him. Our bodies shyly and slowly learning each other. I remember all those perfect nights. The slow burning passion that was gentle and sure and all consuming. Then I remember finding a million reasons why it could never work. And for the rest of my life I will regret not saying those 4 little words that could have changed everything. I hope I don't repeat my mistakes in the future. I don't want to ruin any more good things.