Tony stark x little (gn!) reader
(They/them) used as collective for all instead of single gender defining pronouns
Warnings: age regression, names like daddy, little one, baby. Mention of paci,stuffys,coloring books, sippy etc.This was falsely labeled as ddl(gn) at one point
Edited to the best of my ability.
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The falling feeling you got at least once a week set in, a feeling when your eyes open up and the colors of the world set in how they did before hydra had got their hands on you as a child, your mind isn’t as loud, the urge to speak less and take in more, all of which you thought was your mind going back to hydra days where you were constantly alert.
The feeling like you need to be attached to something set in, there was no clear reason, you just found safety and comfort from it.
You close your laptop and grab one of Tony’s hoodies, you make your way to where you knew he would be, you grab a small snack and put it in your pocket to share with him, dried fruit was easy and healthy so he happily bought more for you.
You open the door to the lab and stumble in, settling down in the beanbag chair in the corner of his lab space, a safe distance away from the dangerous equipment, he hadn't seen or heard you come in since he’s deep in the zone and his music was loud, he’s working on a circuit board with a higher power amplitude at a smaller scale, he finishes soldering the wires to the circuit, looking up he spins around quickly after seeing you in his peripheral vision.
Just one look at you seeing the glossy haze over your eyes he knows what’s goin on, so in his softer voice he uses when you’re feeling like this he acknowledges your sneaky appearance, "Natasha teaching you how to sneak around? Or is it Bucky? Even worse, is Clint teaching you the vents?" You giggle and shake you head no, “I know, I’m just killin my ears and you’re takin advantage of it" he kisses your forehead and flopping down into the beanbag with you, pulling your legs across his lap and your head to rest against his shoulder.
The sensation given exactly how you need it but you still don’t know why. A few weeks ago you pulled away trying not to bother him with being clingy since you thought he’d be upset at you for taking up his valuable time but apparently he programmed Friday to tell him when you stated feeling like this for over an hour if you hadn't gone to him yet.
He’d go searching for you instead and spend that time with you cuddled up even taking naps, somehow this feeling inside your brain has managed to help his sleep deprivation get a bit better.
He had reassured you that it was okay to come find him and be clingy, that it was normal and if it helps you feel more comfortable than so be it.
With you curled up with him you pulled the snack out of the pocket and held it out for him, he opened it and took a few dried fruit pieces chewing on them and you following suit.
"I’m pretty sure I know what this feeling you have is, if my presumption is correct than what it is, is not full swing yet" he places a caring and loving kiss to your forehead running his hand up and down your back soothing you to sleep, causing him to smile to himself.
Tony stands up with you carefully draped in his arms, carrying you up to your shared room,
He’s almost completely sure that what’s happening isn't full swing but he knows for a fact he will be there when it happens.
He turns on the soothe light he had put in because of your fear of the dark.
It may only be noon but a nap with his love seemed perfect, he had an almost completely clear schedule for the next week and a half.
He lays down with you resting half on his chest half not, your hand rest above his arc reactor with his shirt fisted in you clutch. He smiles to himself and that’s when he gets the bright idea for a last minute gift upon all the many others he’s already got for you.
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You both wake just a few hours later and you feel perfectly normal now, "is it okay if i run an errand? I will only be out for two hours max", you nod "just be back for dinner" you pat his reactor, he pulls you in for a kiss before leaving the house with a smile on his face.
It doesn't take him long to get to the local grocery store, making his way through aisles picking up several items, a few stuffed animals, crayons and coloring books, blocks, puzzles, sippy cup, beads and string, paci-clips, hair bobbles just incase, and snacks." He gets to the register and as he goes to pay the cashier chimes, "whose kid?" And he snarks, "why does it matter? I get you’re just curious but if i wasn't a celebrity it wouldn't even strike your curiosity" and they look down apologizing.
He gets to the second store to pick up two different hoodies he’s sure you’re gonna love. Once back at the house he quickly tucks the copious bags of items into a room with only his access getting top priority shipping on an order of adult pacis in your favorite colors.
He finds you working on one of your projects while perched at the counter waiting for the water to boil so you can continue cooking, he places one hand on your hip and the other at the base of your ribcage kissing your cheek three times definitely getting your attention, "want help with dinner?" He moves the hand on your hip up to link with the one on your torso resting his chin on your shoulder and he holds you, your back against his chest. "I don’t see why not, id love the company" you both sway for a moment enjoying the contact.
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Christmas is in three days, the pacis showed up two days ago, he got the box with all of the items decorated and put together and stored where you don’t have access.
Its been a long rainy morning with you tucked into his chest, holding you close while he reads aloud, occasionally stumbling over the words.
The first crack of thunder splays its reverberations through the city, a small jolt in surprise but nothing more, a second and third simultaneously rage through the ambiance of your home, this one causing a shriek to be torn from your once settling form.
You shrink into yourself as pulls you unimaginably closer placing an impossibly soft kiss to the crown of your head.
Your face buried in his shoulder and your trembling body putting your anxiety Even higher.
"Sir, protocol small" he nods "thanks Friday"
"You’re okay, I’m here I’ve got you, the storm isn’t going to hurt you, kay?" You whimper in response and he’s sure its completely set in, he was hoping it wouldn't happen like this but it did so he cant do anything but be there like he said he would.
He picks you up in his arms, your legs instinctively wrapped around his waist, he carries you to the room that only he has access to.
Similar to any other room just more comforting colors, a soft grey fluffy rug, a coffee table in the center of the room, a couch and another one of those giant beanbags you so love, a tv upon the wall and a small kitchenette off to the side, next to the entrance door on the adjacent wall is another door which you assumed was a closet of some sort.
He sets you down on the giant beanbag chair and your eyes go big when he starts walking to the other side of the room, is he going to leave you in here?, is he just going to leave, you don't even know where you are, what part of the house is this? Is this some sort of containment cell, just fancy? The panic sets in heavier, you feel like crying but not the normal feeling of crying, tears start to well in you eyes, he returns from the door just a moment later with a box decorated for Christmas.
He seats himself on the couch after setting the box by the foot of your beanbag, "now I’ve been looking into what’s been going on since your first day at the tower and the day you came home with me, i think I have it understood." You nod, slowly processing what he said. "Friday turn on cartoons", "yes sir, if you would like me to, at any request i can add cartoons to protocol small" tony gives a small nod that happened to be registered.
Your attention gets caught by the colors and images from the tv and you start to feel like a child again, chirping in joy you point at the tv "look, is silly" as the characters play a game you don't quite understand. "Alrighty how bout I explain the happenings real quick and you can open your present?" You nod and crawl out of your beanbag and join him on the couch, nestling yourself into his arms.
"Alright, this feeling started after hydra yes?-you nod-so what i believe is happening is called age regression or little space although that gets mixed up with other things that you shouldn't think about in this type of little space. Its a coping mechanism where you revert back to an adolescent age mentally and take on actions of such. How you dress, look, sound or do or what you eat when little does not change your little space. Its all about finding happiness and joy"
You look up at him wanting to respond but the cogs turning slowly, too slowly for a response to come of it.
"With that being said you’re not always going to be happy and joyful in little space its more of your mind setting new building blocks to remake something that was damaged in your time at hydra or something that was neglected while at hydra" he went into further detail stopping to re explain things with better clarification when you needed.
He could see you mentally putting the pieces together and fighting with your mind, it kept saying, this is wrong, this is bad, you’re gonna be hurt but you so wanted to believe it’ll be okay, especially with how careful he's been even before you'd fully regressed.
He could tell that you’re on edge so to help he took his hoodie off and helped you put it on, cozying you up and holding you close using self-soothing movements to calm your mind, drawing shapes in the backs of your hands with his thumbs, "you’re okay, i promise you’re okay, I’ve got you, you don’t have to accept me as a caregiver, i can just accompany you, if you do want me to watch over you, keep you safe to the very best of my ability than i would be honored but this is all up to you"
You turn your head looking up at him and patting his arc reactor, "i want, i do want" he smiles to himself, hugging you real tight and peppering kisses to your cheeks making you giggle out in a heart-swelling way, "why don’t you open up the box its got lots of stuff for beginning to accept this as a coping mechanism, i wanted you to have something comforting for when you first drop"
You hop off the couch and drop onto your knees opening the box willed with tons of colorful tissue paper (ya know, the paper you put in gift bags? The colorful translucent paper?), beneath the thick layer of color are individually wrapped items, you pull out the first one, looking to him for permission to open, he nods and you rip the paper open, flailing your when the tape sticks to you causing him to chuckle and help take it off.
The first item out of the box was a stack of for coloring books all to different themes, two of them of cartoons, "fank you" you grin biting your tongue. The next item was obviously crayons for the coloring books, you continue on pulling items out until the floor around you is covered in the gifts and all the trash is in the box, items consisting of blocks, a sippy cup, puzzles, string and beads, hair bobbles, pacis and a couple clips, two fluffy hoodies, the coloring books and crayons, and three stuffed animals; one of which you've latched onto, clutching him to your chest holding the package of pacis out for tony to open, "what do we say?" he takes the pack in hand "hewp pease?" He nods with a hum, "very good" he hands back the open pack and you grab your favorite colored one and placed the teat of it in your mouth biting it and than flipping it upside down and back. Something that'll definitely be in your mouth more than just when you’re little.
(That’s based on having an oral fixation)
Joining him back on the couch, burying yourself into his chest, your stuffy still tucked in your arm, "fank chu, lub youu"
He wraps you both up in the blanket that rests on the back of the couch, laying back with you in his hold, running his hand up and down your back and his other in your hair, "Friday dim the lights and turn on (favorite animated movie) make sure the volume is down", you whimper into his chest, nuzzling into his hand, I know, you’re okay, I’m not gonna leave, were gonna take a nap- he places a kiss to the crown of your head- i was thinking turning this room into a little space safe room for you that only you and i will have access to, do you want that?" You nod, barely awake at this point and he can feel your breathing settle, the rhythmic sound of you suckling on your paci stops and he knows you’re out.
"I promise to be the best daddy i possibly can, all for you"
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Thank you for reading, im so sorry it took me so long to post it, im just tired and my head hurts constantly.
Todays random song this one
