Oct 5, 2019
Well even with all the work and pain. On shining sun or in the rain. The hardest thing for me in these times is to not have anybody to talk to.
seen from Thailand
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Martinique
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from India
seen from Spain
seen from United States
seen from Argentina
seen from United States
seen from Brazil
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from China
seen from Bulgaria
seen from United States
seen from China
Well even with all the work and pain. On shining sun or in the rain. The hardest thing for me in these times is to not have anybody to talk to.
It has been a long time
Again... I know but sometime ago I Left this blog with that I won't write anything again, but today hits differently.
Being with my fiancée for two and half year, but I feel like I could be happier with knowing it isn't possible and without her even knowing anything.
Currently I'm listening to music I've listened mostly about nine or eight years ago which was time I've started this blog, so in some way I'm looking back to the better times in hope it'll get better again.
One thing is that I don't know how to dance. Even worse is that I don't have anyone to dance with since my fiancée does not dance and I left all my friends that I could dance with kinda forgotten when I was moving from my parents.
Another thing is that I don't have anyone to share this with and I don't want to bother her with it. More like I want the best for her since she it really big introvert.
The thing about that is I want to live this life as happy as I can with this hoping for another chance or life in a way. Like that there will be new life after this one.
One thing I know for sure is that I made a bad thing long time ago which changed my life and life of one another person due to how I felt back then. Now I know it was bad and that I acted emotionally.
I’m really back once again!
It has been a few weeks since my last post, but here’s another, ‘cause today I have bought tickets for opera. And I’m so happy and looking forward to it.
So next time I’ll write probably about how was it, but before that I’ll have to solve a lot of things such as transportation of what we’re going to eat.
That’s all folks for today.
Well, I began to notice that sometimes I’m not hiding from the world. But mostly I try not to face my own feelings, because I fear they will hurt me.
Sometimes i got the desire to tell everybody to fuck off.
Dunno why, but that just the way it is. And also i’m feeling sorry at the same time even though i don’t say it most of the times. It’s like hell.
Passing time
For such a long time I was always thinking about how time passes. Every time I come to work and sit at my desk, and it felt like same me, same day, like the only thing that changes is the date I wrote into e-mails.
But today I discovered that this is all my own fault. Because yesterday I did also some work at home and changed few things, and did some clean up. And today I feel like it is not same day, same me.
So the thing is, as long as I will be productive doing something that will get me something to remember. I will feel better.
COVID -19 Quarantine
Well it has been two weeks since they closed our school. For the first week or so it was ok but then they forbid us to come to work so I lost every piece of my activities and now I’m stuck home. I haven’t been in town for a week now and I will go nuts soon.
At least now I can talk to some of my friends trough internet.
Also I watch a lot of shows on Netflix, But I still don’t know what to do, I have so much time.
The worst thing about memories is that they can become nightmares.
LonelyFireWolf