#lovingmark

[boizboizboiz123]

So we finally are officially over. I think it's been a great 'relationship' and sadly I do agree that it probably wouldn't have lasted. No just kidding I think we could've tried long distance, but I want you to be happy and if I can't make that happen then yes I understand that to be okay. I am super grateful that we will stay best friends or friends how ever you want to say it I'll say too. I really hope we can hang out still while I'm still here and then maybe while you're in Berne you can come and visit me at camp and we can just go out to dinner and talk. As friends. I'm trying to remember how we were when we were friends haha but just know that I'm here for you no matter what. If you are having a bad day. I still love you and care about you. If I get the nerve to mention these posts to you well then hi. Wow I am the most awkward person ever. Okayyy. Sorry I'm literally just talking to myself. That's why I like this blog. Okay back to mark. Thank you for always being there for me when I needed you. I will still probably talk to you if I have problems with my mom. Oh but you probs don't care about my problems anymore haha. Yes I have a sore in my heart, but it will soon go away.

[boizboizboiz123]

µ

alright, i know you are probably not knowing what to do, but i say just try to forget about it. you are super kind, funny, smart, and you do care for me. i think my dad just doesn't like you for dumping me in the first place or maybe he doesn't like that we got back together. but hey, dad's are going to be very protective of their daughter's and it just so happens my dad is. i don't know if you are ignoring me on purpose or if you just don't have your phone, but no matter what my dad thinks i love you. nothing EVER will change that. you make me smile, laugh, and feel whole. i don't know what i would do without you. this is just a bump in the road, and luckily it's our first real fight even though it's not a fight. it's just a problem with my dad... fun fact: this just happened on the show new girl... yes i know you hate the show but what nick did was just impress jess and told her that he didn't care what her father thought and jess agreed. also winston and schmidt told nick that jess loves him for the way he is and that he didn't have to change for her. this is the same with me! you're amazing just the way you are!! (bruno mars) i hope we get to go to the zoo on monday... we need to spend time together!! we haven't really yet so i think we should. i love you oh so much and hope we can get through this

[boizboizboiz123]

µ

i am NOT mad at you. honest. i am just disappointed that we made plans and each time you have something come up. i'm just bored at home doing nothing and would like to get to hang out with you because you are my boyfriend outside of my house. i know you are now changing your sleep schedule for me which is awesome! like that makes me feel great and i can't wait to spend endless hours in the day with you. i hope we will finally get to go to the zoo and i can post a pic on insta saying zoo with my boo hahaha i think that would be super funny and i want to post that really badly haha i love you more than you know!

[boizboizboiz123]

µ

i love love love you. when i say it i mean it. i truly do. i don't want or need anyone else but you. you complete me. you get me. i get you. always have always will. i think we can make it through college. no i know we can. i love you so much. when you sing even though you don't think you can, trust me you can. when you sing josh turner nothing is sweeter than that low voice. you can hit those notes and it is amazing and beautiful just like you. i'm sorry my sister's hate you. my dad says its because they didn't like the way i was depressed for those 3 months when we weren't together. who knows, but i'm not as depressed anymore :) you are just awesome and catie just came in my room so i'm just going to stop writing and write again soon :) <3

[boizboizboiz123]

µ

i am so lucky, i am so lucky, i am so lucky. you are so amazing, and you don't even know how amazing you are to me. you make me so happy. i feel so much better when you are around. this is like the beach! i told you i really wanted to go, and you were like alright lets go. and we did! wow, i can't believe you are going to experience the best concert of your life! okay, maybe not YOUR favorite concert but for sure MINE! ahhh i am SO excited. that night will be so much fun, AH i love you so much. i mean you came over just to bring me a charger to make lindsey like you more! you are truly so special to me, and i don't know what i would do without you :)

[boizboizboiz123]

µ

wow, it took 3 months for us to get back together :) i missed you so much. those months were the worst. i wanted to talk to you all the time, and i didn't know how to say anything without you thinking i still had feelings for you. i don't care if people think we are stupid or don't think we should be together. there's no point to! as long as we love each other (which we do) we are fine!! you are such an amazing kisser and i hate that 1. you don't think i love you as much as you love me and 2. that you don't think you are handsome. you are beautiful to me. yah i said it. beautiful. you are so funny and crazy and weird and just like me. you truly are the best kisser, and you care for me. i missed you so much. this weekend was amazing, and it can only get better. i'm getting happy again. can't believe that tweet was right ;) i love you so so so so much :) :) :)

[boizboizboiz123]

µ

i just want to talk to you!!! it will be so much easier moving on by us talking... but you keep bailing... yes last night was interesting but i knew you were drunk and i didn't and wouldn't ever take advantage of you. i did the right thing and not kiss you. of course i wanted to and still want to but that's not going to make me. i just miss you and i miss being with you all of the time. we were best friends and i want to go back to that. when we talk about everything, we will be fine! i just don't get it... i still haven't gone a day without crying... i was doing so well. i am ready to move on. truly i am. i just miss you

[boizboizboiz123]

µ

That’s it. Our first real official fight and you just run away from it. How could you? I can’t sleep. I can’t think of anything or anyone but you. You’re so selfish. You truly thought about this all yesterday too. I know the fighting before was because I am a bitch and you didn’t understand or I would just idk. I love you so much. Literally can’t stop crying. I can’t believe you broke up with me. I really can’t. Fuck. Another thing that reminds me of you. Why are you my best friend. This fucking sucks. All I wanted was for us to be happy. We could’ve worked on it!!! You are such a coward. Fucking coward. You suck so much but at the same time you don’t at all. I know this is all my fault. How can you go from saying yay to valentines day and now what. I don’t know. My whole world is turned upside down now. I still want to know what we were going to do. Or did you always plan to break up with me. Yahh that’s probably it. Wow. I don’t want to go to school. I don’t want to be near you but I sit by you in fucking choir. I don’t know what I’m going to do. You asshole. If we talked it out. It would’ve been fine. It would’ve been fine. Sick and tired of fighting. I was too I was trying to stop. All I want is you. No one else but you.