I have been trying to be more positive in my social media (which is why there’s been less posts here) but I have actually received messages from various people that it feels like I’m just trying to exclude details from the people who love me. They’ve actually said it sometimes feels forced because, well, honestly I’m dying and it can’t all be rainbows and butterflies right? I get it. I do. I always thought that the more positive I try to be, the more positive I will feel. I still think that’s true. There will be positive posts but also posts where I’m having a bad day. Balance, right? This morning I woke with a 102 fever. Took medicine, jumped to 103. Then 103.5. My body has a very low core temp normally. I’m usually at 97.0 on a normal day whereas other people are usually 98.6 so when it spikes that high, it actually means it’s even higher based on my low core temp. It was a scary morning wondering if I’m turning septic, yet again, or if I needed to head to the emergency room. I feel terrible right now but over the last 2-3 hours I’ve gotten my temp down to 100.9. Hopefully it keeps dropping. My next course of IV antibiotics is being delivered tonight. My infectious disease doc is putting me on a 3 week course this time. I don’t think I’ve updated insta in awhile. I’m now also on oxygen 24/7 because my infections and long term antibiotics use is killing the function of my lungs. Please send good vibes, prayers, magical powers of healing my way if you can. I am in extreme pain right now, having fevers and chills, and just feel unwell. So there’s my weekly update. Thanks for everyone who sends me love and light. Xoxo 💋 #pyelonephritis #pyelonephritisaintnojoke #infectiongoaway #infectiousdisease #lowoxygenlevels #chronicbadass #chronicillness #spoonielife #dyingainteasy #sendhealingpowers (at West Jordan, Utah) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bn_lg-EAtEQ/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1yqna7bj28mz