this request was submitted by sweet @ariajc79 . I'm so sorry this took so long. I truly hope you're still active on here to see it. Enjoy. x
word count:
warnings: mentions of suicide, mental illness, and self harm
A yawn escaped her lips as she climbed out of bed, grabbing Saeyoung’s t-shirt to cover her naked body. It dropped to her knees as she walked to the restroom, ruffling her hair and trying to wake her brain to catch up to her body. But then she had a funny feeling, her nose wrinkling as she tuned in to the rest of the apartment. Something was missing, though she couldn’t put a finger on it just yet. She brushed a piece of her hair behind her ear as she leaned her head out of the bathroom.
Then it made sense.
There was always some sort of noise throughout the apartment, and it almost always had to do with Saeyoung. The silence was alarming, her brows furrowing as she quickly used the restroom, washed her hands, and walked out into the hallway.
“Saeyoung? Honey?” Again silence, her bare feet echoing from stepping on the cold tile as she shivered to herself. Without Saeyoung by her side she had become all too aware of the chill that ran through the house, making a mental note to turn on the heater to prepare for the frost of Winter. She wandered past the hall to get towards the familiar kitchen when she felt herself stumble over something soft, her arms sprawling forward to catch herself as she turned her head back to see what it was. Her eyes widened as soon as she saw the familiar grey hoodie and flaming red hair peek out from the ruffled cloth.
“Saeyoung! Darling, are you okay?” She was immediately at his side, her touch gentle as she reached for his arms and rubbed them to try and soothe him. He was shaking violently, gripping his sides as he furrowed his brows and shook his head.
“No…”
“Is it a stomach bug? Are you feeling feverish?” She wasn’t trying to be pushy, just more try to understand what was going on to help him. She felt him wince as she passed over a certain part of his forearm, his head suddenly snapping up as he glared at her. His face left her stunned as she recoiled in surprise, furrowing her brows in confusion. His golden eyes that were always so warm towards her were suddenly hard like rock, blocking her out as he sat up on his knees.
“No! Jesus Christ, can I just exist without you breathing down my neck every five minutes?” He sounded so cold; she couldn’t help the tears that had started to well as she brought her hands to her lap and clasped them together tightly.
“I see.” Her sad tone made him snap out of his brief irritation as he melted, his voice starting off quiet as he too started to feel the oncoming of tears.
"No! No, Y/N, that's not what I meant. I'm just..." Before she could encourage him to continue he burst into another fit of tears, her eyes wide as he gripped his hair on the sides of his head and pulled tight.
"My brain. Won't. Shut. Up." With each word he beat his fists against his head while Y/N sprang to his side, grabbing his arms with her hands and pulling with all her strength to prevent him from doing it again. He suppressed a scream that she could only describe as the source of agony itself, fat tears rolling down his pale face as he looked at her with desparation.
"You need to tell me what's going on, Saeyoung. I can't help you if you don't talk to me." Her pleas were desperate as her arms grew sore from forcing his down to his sides. He trembled while he struggled to keep his breathing steady, sweat beading across his forehead as he squeezed his eyes shut.
"Look at me," She it was barely above a whisper as she gently guided his arms and hands to her chest and stomach, spreading his palms flat against the areas. "Feel my heartbeat. Breathe. Deeply."
It took a couple of tries but he opened his eyes, golden honey rigid and anxious as his breathing began to regulate. While his breathing had stabilized the tears had not, his voice weak as he threw himself into her arms. She was ready for it, squeezing him tight as he collapsed into her lap and chest.
"I've found my brother and yet; it's not the same. I know he wishes me dead some days. I can't help but agree with him."
"Saeyoung."
"Is he wrong, Y/N? Can you deny him his truth? I abandoned him."
"I'm going to stop you now, before you continue on your tangents that you do." Her voice was firm and her gaze turned steely, Saeyoung stuttering in his sorrow filled monologue as he waited for her to continue.
"You were manipulated into leaving him behind. I know you don't like telling yourself this, but it's the truth. You were a victim too. You don't have to pity yourself every day, but you can at least give yourself some grace. You were just a kid." Though her grasp was firm and her gaze honest, her voice was soft and patient, reminding him that she would tell him again if that's what he wanted.
"I just don't know how to get out of this. I've been trying so hard to keep all my feelings at bay. Now...it's too much. It's like I'm being suffocated." Y/N stood and brought him up with her, pulling on his hoodie and adjusting the wrinkles in it as she looked into his eyes.
"I think," She paused to clean up his glasses, his vision blurring for a moment as he watched her facial expression go from clear, to a blurry blob of nothing.
"Finding a great therapist, and taking today to just veg out and eat some chips sounds great." She placed his glasses gently back on his face and offered a small smile while tilting her head. That smile that had become clear as day again, flooded him with reassurance and warmth as he brought his sleeves up to his wet face.
PLEASE your hawks profile made my heart go brr :'))) LOVING the new layout! xx
HAWKS GANG <3 im still in the process of watching bnha but ive always loved hawks as a character sm he’s very comforting for me !! i can’t wait to write for him when i’m done with the manga n show >:)
Hiya! Could I request the RFA (+ minor trio, if it isn't too much trouble) with an MC who gives neck kisses frequently? 👉👈 I am just. A simple soul with simple desires skfkek. Please and thank you💞
Of course you can sweetie! This is such a cute prompt!!! Sorry to everybody who I’ve kept waiting; I’m slowly gaining back my strength, so I should be back to writing soon! - luna xx
RFA + V, Saeran, and Vanderwood Reacts to an MC Who Gives Neck Kisses
Zen
• He loves it so much honestly
• The first time it happens you honestly caught him off guard
• You were both sitting on the couch watching one of his performances
• His arm was around your shoulders and your legs were in his lap, snuggled closely as he studied his moves
• “Honey~” You whispered nonchalantly, trying to catch his attention as he leaned forward slightly
• “One moment my sweet; I just want to make sure I don’t make the same mistake that I made here in my next performance.”
• You understood, but still huffed; all you wanted was to kiss him
• The two of you hadn’t gone all the way yet, so you always hesitated to kiss him in rather intimate spots like the neck or chest
• You loved doing neck kisses so honestly it’s been killing you
• With slight hesitation you leaned up, kissing his neck a couple of times
• His entire body becomes rigid and he freezes
• “Y-Y/N...”
• You did it again, giggling the second time as you noticed his neck and chest growing hot
• “Ah I see, so you’re doing it purposely then.” He smirked, turning off the TV and immediately pouncing on you
• You had to be careful when giving him neck kisses because it usually turned into something more after you’d finally went all the way~
Yoosung
• He’s such a blushy boy that when it came to your neck kisses, he just didn’t know how to cope
• When you’d first done it you’d been dating for only a couple of weeks
• It was mindless really, and you’d felt like giving him some affection so you figured; why not?
• “Yoosung; can we order in tonight? I think we both deserve a break, and I’ve been craving some hot pot~”
• “Sure! Let me just finish writing this paper and we’ll go.”
• You grinned and without thinking leaned in, placing a chaste kiss to his neck
• Never in his life had he turned red so fast, and when I say red I mean r e d
• “H-Hey! Don’t do that without warning...” He whined, placing one hand over his face to try to hide his blushing
• He’s literally so cute pleaSE
• You did it again, enjoying the way he squirmed at his desk as he groaned.
• “I’m never going to finish this paper if you keep that up, Y/N.”
• It had reached the point where he wouldn’t get turned on every single time, but it was still enough to make him blush
Jaehee
• She herself isn’t very affectionate, besides the occasional hugs and kisses that she shared with you in private
• So when you kissed her neck for the first time, she had frozen up with a deep blush
• The kiss wouldn’t leave her mind, she thought about it all day really
• When it became obvious that this was something that you did frequently?
• It was all she looked forward to
• “Y/N.”
• “Yes, Jaehee?”
• “May...may I possibly have another kiss?”
• This poor woman is touch starved omg
• You were happy to oblige, especially if it meant that you got to see her gentle smile every time you did it
• She wouldn’t allow you to do it in front of the others though due to her own embarrassment
• She’s also low key jealous but she’ll never admit that GJEJGEAHG
Jumin
• He’s actually a huge fan of the neck kisses
• He makes it known the first time that you do it, your lips softly grazing against his neck as the two of you sat in bed
• He was finishing some last minute paperwork while you silently read a book beside him, his glasses falling down the bridge of his nose as you tilted your head
• It had been a long day and you wanted to stay up with him but you were just so tired
• “Please don’t stay up if you’re tired, Y/N. Once I’m finished with this file, I will be ready for bed. I promise.”
• You yawned, a small smile gracing his face as you bookmarked your book
• “Okay Jumin. Goodnight, I love you~” And bloop you had kissed his neck
• He was still for a moment, his brain processing what happened as he gave another smile
• His eyes shifted towards you; you’d already fallen asleep, head resting against his arm as he chuckled.
• “Goodnight, Y/N.”
• Since then he’s been obsessed, demanding that you give him neck kisses every time he leaves for work, and when he comes home
• You happily oblige every time, the action becoming a little secret routine between the two of you
707
• He absolutely loves that you give frequent neck kisses
• Like Jaehee, he’s pretty touch starved
• So it’s super reassuring that whenever you’re cuddling, or hugging, or sitting in his lap
• You’ll just lean over and place a soft kiss to his neck
• It makes him feel loved, safe, and wanted
• When you’d first done it, you had fallen asleep on the sofa while he finished some work assigned by Jumin
• He didn’t want to wake you so he took you into his arms and carried you to your shared bedroom
• In your sleep you’d craned your neck up, kissing him softly on the neck as you mumbled
• “I love you...” You’d whispered, burrowing deeper into his chest as his breath hitched
• His heart felt warm, and he smiled down towards your sleeping figure, a hint of blush tinting his cheeks as he whispered back
• “I love you too, Y/N.”
V
• A flustered mess
• This poor man isn’t used to affection, but unlike the others he’s grown used to not having any
• So when you kiss his neck it’s like he malfunctions
• He stutters over his words and tries not to blush, even though it’s fairly obvious
• “I...wow. I um, I actually really liked, well, um—“
• You kinda liked having this much power over him to be honest lol
• He loves it when you kiss his neck, he just doesn’t know how to express it with his words
• He never stops you when you do it though, and you can see it in his eyes that he appreciates that it’s one of your ways that you show your affection for him
• “Jihyun~ I love you.”
• That phrase is usually followed by a neck kiss, his cheeks red as he nods and pulls you close
• “I love you more, Y/N. For the rest of my life.”
Saeran
• Love love, loves your neck kisses
• He returns them actually, and that in turn makes you extremely flustered
• When you’d done it he grinned, rubbing his nose against yours as he cuddled you close
• “My darling Y/N.”
• Then when you’d least expected it he’d done it back; very nonchalantly to be honest
• You were helping him in the garden, and you’d successfully cross bred a rose with him
• He was so happy and proud of you that he just couldn’t help it; he’d kissed your neck
• You blushed hard, but he wasn’t phased at all
• You honestly didn’t think you’d meet somebody who gave neck kisses as much as you did, but here he was
• It was a reminder that the two of you were definitely meant for each other
• It became one of the most frequent and common ways you showed your affection for one another
Vanderwood
• Like V, he isn’t used to affection so when you first do it to him he’s genuinely startled
• “H-Hey...who do you think you are?”
• Your partner duh lmao
• He’s very good at keeping a poker face, but his actions definitely give away the fact that he loves it
• The way he cranes his neck a little towards you when you’re cuddling him
• The way he lays his chin on top of your head to give you complete access to his neck
• It was obvious to you, and you happily obliged every time he silently asked for a neck kiss
• You could never get away with teasing him though; he shut it down before you could even start
• “You know love, if you enjoy my neck kisses all you have to do is say—“
• “Hush. I don’t have to say a damn thing, about anything, okay?”
Hello! I was wondering if you could write some angst with happy ending one-shot about MC having baby with Saeyoung but he doesn’t know about her, because he pushed away MC after their “first time” in Rika’s apartment and told her that he don’t want to involve her into his live so when she finds out about her pregnancy she run away from Korea. 4 years later she’s coming back and Seven accidentally finds out about his little daughter.
I see that I have now become the one for ANGST and i love it - luna xx
warnings: none?? at least i don’t think
word count: 3.9k
Empty.
That was the first thing she noticed as her eyes slowly opened. She was groggy, her arms spreading out as she stretched across the queen sized bed. Her arm swept over to her left, cold and empty sheets returning her warm touch as she blinked for a moment. She noticed that the sheets felt a little too close to her body, brows furrowing as she slowly lifted the sheets and looked down. She was met with the site of her naked body, a blush washing across her face and neck as she hurriedly placed the sheets back down. She sat up, her lower back a little sore as she hissed and leaned against the many pillows surrounding her.
What had happened?
Her hair fell around her face, hands reaching up and pulling it back as she looked around. Her eyes caught onto her pajamas that were strewn about the floor, along with her underwear. Again she blushed, eyes still scanning the room until they fell on the familiar hoodie that lie crumpled on the floor beside her messy clothing. That’s when the memories hit her. His warm and soft touch across her body, the way his lips nipped and sucked at the most sensitive parts of her. His breathless moans, her soft whines as they intertwined together. It was passionate, it was sweet; she remembered what he said to her as they finished together.
I love you.
A small smile came to her face as she scooted away from the wall and towards the edge of the bed, using the sheets to cover her naked body. Her legs twitched as her toes touched the cold floor, going to stand until they shook and she lost her balance. She fell to the floor with a small thud, huffing in frustration and embarrassment as she tried to hoist herself up. The noise caught his attention, her eyes looking to the door as he ran into the room.
“Oh! Y/N, are you okay?” He didn’t wait for an answer; he made his way over and helped her up, the feel of his hands pressed against the small of her back and her shoulders enough to make her blush as she spoke up.
“Yeah...just a little sore.” She avoided his gaze, but she could see the small smile on his face as he placed her on the bed and walked toward his jacket. She gave a breathy sigh and then cleared her throat, watching him place his jacket back on and adjust his jeans.
“So, um...” She wanted to talk about what happened last night, but she didn’t know how to. What was she supposed to say anyway? I mean it was good; obviously it was very good. But what now? They admitted their feelings to each other...so did that mean that they would be together? Like she always hoped they would?
“We don’t, uh, have to talk about it.” He cut her off, sending her another small smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. His voice was calm, reassuring. But she could see in his eyes that there was a sadness in them, despite the fact that they had shared such a beautiful night together.
“I want to talk about it though. Last night was amazing, I—” She hesitated, seeing how he quickly went back to the door and put his sneakers on. “Seven...?” He stopped, his sneakers still untied as he looked at her. His golden eyes became even sadder, her heart growing heavy as he faced the door.
“Look, Y/N. My life is...complicated. I don’t want to involve you.” Her brows furrowed as he kept his back facing her, his hands clenched into fists as he took a deep breath.
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying...forget about last night. It’s better that way.” She felt like she’d taken a punch to the stomach, a lump forming in her throat as her heart completely sank. Forget? How was she supposed to forget something like that? Something that felt so real, so right?
“What if I don’t want to forget?” She’d meant for her voice to come out stronger, more sure of herself. Instead she sounded small, and shy, her fingers clutching the sheets for dear life as she looked down. Tears were already threatening to spill over, her bottom lip quivering as she shook her head.
“You want me to forget all of that? Forget the kisses we shared, the way I felt...you told me, Seven; you said to me—”
“It meant nothing.” A small gasp escaped her lips as she looked up at him, his head now turned towards her direction. His look was cold, empty as he repeated the words that stabbed her in the chest.
“It meant. Nothing.” She slowly sank back into the bed, turning so that her back was facing him, shock completely taking over her body. The tears were flowing freely now, wetting the pillow as she held it in. She could sense he was still there; he’d already seen a vulnerable side to her; he was not going to see her cry.
“Once I figure out the location of the hacker I’ll work with Jumin to get it taken care of. Once you’re safe; we don’t have to interact again unless it relates to the party.” His footsteps indicated he was leaving the room, and it was confirmed as she heard the door shut behind her. With that she let out a quiet, but painful sob, eyes clenched shut as she lie on the side of the bed that he’d left this morning.
Alone.
+
It had been a couple of days since 707 and Jumin figured out where the hacker was stationed; found out about Mint Eye. They had the authorities swarming the building in minutes, and it seemed that now, the RFA was safe. During their hunt, 707 was confronted by his brother; one that he thought he had lost years ago. She could see the change in him; how he was angry and saddened by all the lies that V had told him. He was hurt by his betrayal, and she was still hurt from his sharp and piercing words; the last words that the two of them had spoken to each other.
A couple of weeks had passed since then, and today was the last day that they were going to be living in the same apartment. Though they lived together they stayed in separate rooms; she couldn’t stand to see him, and he was okay with that. More than okay; he knew that he had hurt her beyond repair, and he figured it was better this way. Especially now that everything came out with his brother; the hacker. He was distracted, typing away at his computer to see if he could find a trace of him, anywhere in Korea. She took that chance to slip out of the apartment, wallet in hand as she hurriedly rushed to the nearest market.
Though it’d been a couple of weeks and the tension was high, something else had her worried. She walked straight to the section that she knew it would be in, grabbing the most accurate one off the shelf and fast walking to the self checkout station. She had the box in her bag and carefully walked into the apartment complex, jumping when she saw that he was waiting for her.
“Where did you go?” His brows were furrowed, noticing that she was acting differently than usual. She was playing with her fingers and avoiding his gaze, leading her throat as she responded.
“I just wanted to go for a short walk. Not like you care anyway.” She pushed past him as he closed his eyes, taking a deep breath before opening them again. It stung, badly but he couldn’t blame her at all. After what he said to her...she had every right to snap at him and avoid him. He sat back down at his laptop, hesitating slightly as he looked back towards her room. His heart ached; he wanted to go to her, tell her that he didn’t regret that night, that it meant everything to him. But the damage was done, and so he cracked his knuckles and rolled his shoulders, typing away to find his brother.
Meanwhile she was in the restroom, pacing back and forth in front of the sink as the little white stick took its time to process and think. She was pleading, hands clasped together in front of her mouth as she continued to pace. The timer on her phone went off and she dove for the stick, bringing it up to her eyes and reading the results. She sank down to her knees in shock, the two lines reading loud and clear on the positive test as her hands started to shake. She missed her period, but she thought it was related to all of the stress from dealing with the hacker. She never thought...
With shaking hands she hurriedly pulled up the RFA app, fingers miss typing so much that she almost laughed. Tears were falling down her face as she sniffed, the phone picking up on the 2nd ring.
“Hello?”
“Jaehee; please. Help me.”
+
She waited until Seven had gone back to his place, the apartment empty of all the things that had belonged to him. Her own items were packed away in a suitcase, coat and scarf wrapped around her as she waited for Jaehee and Jumin. Her stare was blank as she focused on the wall in front of her, heart aching at the decision she had made. Did she want to go through this pregnancy alone? Of course not. But she couldn’t tell her family; at least, not yet. Not when she was only in her first term. She felt nauseated at the idea of telling him; telling him that he was going to be a father. She wanted to; he had every right to know that what they did that night; they were going to have a child.
But after everything came out with his brother? She couldn’t.
There was already so much on his plate, and she knew that if she added her pregnancy onto that he would completely shut down. After talking with Jaehee, who brought it up to Jumin she had decided; she couldn’t stay here in Korea. Knowing that he was so close to her, that any moment they could cross paths and he could see her growing stomach; her body that held their child. The thought of it made her sick; she just couldn’t do it. She’d thought about abortion, thinking that maybe that would be best. But she couldn’t help fantasizing about what their child would look like; would they have his hair? His eyes? His strange, but warm personality?
Those thoughts are what made her decide that abortion wasn’t the answer either; she would rather raise this child alone, than try to reason with Seven who had already made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with her. There was a soft knock on the door, and then it was pushed open, Jaehee and Jumin standing on the other side of it as her eyes slowly peeled away from the wall and looked in their direction. Held in her hands were plane tickets to Europe, Jumin being the first one to walk over to her. He knelt down in front of her, gray eyes strong but warm as he gently took her hands.
“Are you sure you want to do this? I have resources, Y/N, you don’t have to do this alone.” She looked into his eyes, knowing that he meant every single word he said as he patiently waited for her answer.
“I’m sure. You’ve done enough; I just want to disappear. I’ll send you both pictures I just...please. I don’t want the rest of them to know, and I especially don’t want him to know. It would kill him.” Jumin nodded and helped her stand up, taking her suitcase in his hand while Jaehee stepped forward and linked arms with her.
“You’ll always be a part of the RFA Y/N. Never forget that. We will welcome you back with open arms, should you decide that is what you want.” Her heart grew heavy once more as she leaned against Jaehee for support, the tears flowing as she walked out of the apartment, and didn’t look back.
+
Four years. It had been for years since he’d seen, or heard anything form her. He’d managed to find his brother; slowly make amends. It was hard, but he did it, and they were together again just like old times. But his heart was still empty, still missing as his mind occasionally went back to those moments with her. Moments where they joked in the chatroom, picking on Yoosung. When they’d share dinner together in Rika’s old apartment.
That night when they’d made love.
He refused to call it anything else; because that’s what it was. They’d poured their souls into each other, sharing pieces that nobody else would ever get the chance to see. He’d stupidly tossed it away, and now she was gone. Again he couldn’t be mad at her, couldn’t be upset; if anything, he hated himself. He hated how he was so focused on pushing others away, that he missed out on the most important thing in his life.
Her.
All these years that she was gone they could have grown together; maybe even started a family. Thoughts like that always depressed him, and he tried his best not to think about it. But it was so hard; he looked for her, everywhere and it was like she had never existed. He couldn’t find anything; and part of him knew that she didn’t do that alone. Jumin and Jaehee rarely talked about her, and when he asked them where she went he was met with vague answers; sometimes no response at all.
The thought of their secrets made his anger bubble up all over again; and he decided it was best to go for a drive. He grabbed his jacket and threw it on, soon heading out into town with one of his sports cars. He parked in a random spot and decided to just walk, not caring where he was going. Now that he’d found his brother he felt...lost. Like there was nothing else to search for. Obviously Y/N didn’t want to be found, so he respected that.
He bit his lip as he thought, throwing his hood up in frustration. He then stopped as he noticed a lone child, crying in front of one of the buildings. Her hair was long enough to catch his attention, yet everybody else seemed distracted, their own errands preoccupying their minds as they left the poor child to cry by herself. He hurriedly walked up, her wails piercing his heart with a strange but almost familiar feeling as he knelt down beside her.
“Hey, hey...are you okay?” She wiped at her eyes as she looked up at him, and immediately he felt his stomach drop. Her eyes were extremely similar, if not identical to his own when he was a child.
“I can’t find my mommy...” She sniffled, her cries building up again as she started to panic. Her Korean was good but she had a small accent; clearly she was not form here, nor raised here.
“That’s okay; I’ll stay beside you and we can wait here for your mommy. Do you remember where you last saw her?”
“Darling!” His head popped up as she saw a woman a few feet away, searching frantically as she panicked. She had shopping bags on her arms, the bags swinging around as she desperately tried to find her child. She fully turned around towards them, her eyes growing wide as she immediately ran for the two of them. His heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest as she grew closer; it was her.
“Baby, oh darling what did I tell you? You cannot leave mommy’s side! Ever!”
“I’m sorry...” She hugged her, the relief prominent on her face as she kissed the top of her head. “This man helped me mommy.” The little girl clutched the bottom of her mother’s coat, pointing to Seven as he slowly stood form his kneeling position. The mother stared back at him, almost dropping her bags as she quickly but gently pulled her daughter behind her.
“Y/N...” She swallowed, though that didn’t make the lump in her throat any smaller as she looked down.
“Seven—”
“Saeyoung.” He interrupted her, her eyes looking up towards him as he continued to stare at the child next to her.
“My real name is Saeyoung. I...is she...?” His hands were shaking as he pointed towards the child who peeked from behind her mother, eyes wide with curiosity as she watched the two adults talk. She hesitated; she didn’t want to tell him, at least, not this way, but she knew better than to lie to him. She gave a small nod, slowly bringing the child to the front of her as he knelt down again.
“Hi...” His voice was soft, holding his hand out to her as she hesitantly placed her small one inside his palm.
“What’s your name? What’s her name?” His eyes switched between the little girl’s and Y/N, a hand pressed against her chest as she tried to hold back tears.
“Angel.” It came out as a whisper, Saeyoung nodding as he cleared his throat to fight back the tears.
“It’s nice to meet you, Angel.” He tried to wipe away the tears that had formed and were threatening to spill, and in the process knocked his hood back. It revealed his bright red hair, and it was then that the little girl’s eyes brightened, her small hands pressing against his face as she cried out.
“Daddy!” Her high-pitched cry is what made the tears completely fall, a choked sob escaping his lips as she leapt into his arms. He looked up in surprise, lifting her up and carrying her on his hip; it was as natural to him as breathing.
“That night we didn’t use...this whole time were you—”
“I’d rather not explain this on the street; I was actually planning to come to your apartment. Maybe cook dinner?” Without hesitation he nodded as he noticed groceries inside the shopping bags, leading them to his car all while trying to keep his emotions under control.
+
“So...how long has she known about me?” Saeyoung watched her from the kitchen, his brother carrying her on his back and running around the living room as she squealed in delight.
“Since she found a picture of you in my dresser a few months ago. She wanted to get to know you and meet you, and I figured that she should have the chance to know who her father is.” She stirred the vegetables absentmindedly, the rice cooker going off just as she turned the heat off.
“You kept pictures of me?” He swallowed, biting his lip as she looked away. He pretended not to notice the flush in her cheeks as she nodded.
“Yeah, I missed you I just couldn’t forget that you existed.” She took a deep breath, placing the vegetables on a large serving platter and bringing ti to the table. Saeyoung was in shock; it’d been so long since he’d seen Y/N; and now she had a daughter. Well, they both had a daughter now. She looked so motherly; the way she wiped her hands on her apron and called for Angel.
“Dinner is ready! Come and eat you two.” She set the plates, and while Saeyoung offered to help she declined. He could tell it wasn’t out of spite; she just genuinely had become so independent. He felt a heavy sense of guilt; if he hadn’t pushed her away that night; what if he’d allowed her to get to know him? Every part of his past; who he was and who he wanted to be. His selfishness and stubbornness caused him to lose four years on a family that he’d had; and he would never forgive himself for that.
He watched fondly as Angel bounded in from the living room, her bubbly personality warming his heart as she sat next to him and eagerly waited to be served. Though dinner was nice there was a lot that needed to be said still, and he knew that as he caught Y/N looking at him often as she switched between feeding herself, and helping Angel eat her food.
Soon it was late, and Angel was fast asleep in the lap of Saeyoung’s brother, the man resting his head on his hand as he leaned his elbow against the arm of the couch. Saeyoung was helping with the dishes, the two of them standing in silence as they switched between handing off plates and placing them on the drying rack.
“I didn’t mean waht I said.” She furrowed her brows, tilting her head as she looked in his direction. He was looking out the window in front of the sink at the stars before turning his attention to her, eyes intense as she shook her head in confusion.
“What?”
“That morning; after we’d had sex. I didn’t mean what I said. That night meant everything to me. I just...with the RFA being in danger, and Mint Eye threatening to take you and my brother I—”
“Saeyoung you don’t have to explain it. I knew that you loved me; I figured it out after I’d been in Europe for the first month of my pregnancy. I just...I couldn’t find the strength to come back and tell you about her. The longer I sat on it the more I tried to push it off. She was my strength. Angel was the courage and the push I needed to come back and see you.”
She hadn’t noticed but a couple of tears threatened to spill, her gaze switching from the dishes to him as she gave a weak sigh.
“I’ve just missed you so much.” Saeyoung dropped the dishes, dipping down and capturing her lips in a kiss. She was surprised, wide eyed as he kissed her hard. She too let the dishes fall back into the soapy water, wet hands grabbing his shirt as she kissed him right back. He pulled away first, golden eyes melting her just as they did four years ago as he spoke.
“I am never letting you run away from me again. Do you hear me?” She nodded, kissing him first as he reciprocated and lifted her up on the counter top.
“Saeyoung! Angel, Saeran; they’r right—mm!” He interrupted her again, tongue pushing past her lips as he deepened the kiss even more. She let out a soft squeak, giving in to the desire as she ran her now dry hands through his hair. She pulled away for air as he moved down to her neck, pressing light and soft kisses down them as she gave a pleasured sigh.
“Stay,” He pressed another kiss on her collar bone as he whispered, coming back up to make eye contact with her. “Stay with me.”
He pressed his forehead against hers, hands holding tightly to her waist; he felt that if he wasn’t holding on tight enough, she might just disappear all over again. She gave a deep breath, opening her eyes as she brought a hand up to his cheek. Her thumb ran across it, her touch soft as she decided.
hello ! I apologize for not being very active on my blog;;;
here some little updates/reasons why I haven’t been posting much on here!
I’ve become a cat mom of three adorable little cat boys (fucking menaces to society but what can you do LMAO )
I’m getting married on Halloween so I’ve been prepping that with my fiancée~
I’m in school! Midterms have just passed and now I’m working on finals so it’s getting hectic
I’ve received some commissions for my artwork so I’ve had to do those to help pay for my new laptop (old one is starting to crap out on me rip)
I’ve been focusing on writing full fledged chapters for my jumin x fem!reader fic “Vulgar.” (link is here if you’d like to read it! Available on ao3 and wattpad under the same handle)
aaaand that’s basically everything! I don’t receive many asks anymore (which is fine because I’m backed up jdjdhdh) so at this point I’m just posting what I can, when I can.
thank you to all the OGs who have been here since day one, and hello to my new followers! I hope you enjoy my blog and stick around for a while~
if y’all need to vent/just wanna tell me about your day, feel free to talk to me in replies or respond to each other in the replies :) I’ll check them in the morning (it’s like 1 am where I am rn LOLOL)
