The Orphanage (2007)
Yay! Foreign horror! Always better than American horrors.
Note: This post will most definitely contain lots of spoilers.
Please tell me this isn’t going to be a scenario where everyone’s going to think this woman is crazy because something supernatural is happening and she ends up in an institution of some sort. If I just called the ending, I’m going to be very upset. I’ll be so annoyed I’ll take off 20 points.
It’s definitely following that formula. She goes to a group counseling sort of session for grieving parents after he’s been gone six months, and she goes on about how SHE’S NOT CRAZY. SHE KNOWS HER SON’S IMAGINARY FRIENDS TOOK HIM!
Oh, jeezus. Now her only possible link got hit by a car. Because of course she did.
And they found clues at her house that link the cave to some dead kid who she saw but no one else saw. Okay. I’m calling it. Unless this movie has some major twist, I cannot imagine better than an 80.
Okay. So it’s not following the original tropes I thought it was, but now it feels like it’s following a possessed house theme.
Oh, no. Now it’s just, “Believe there are ghosts and you’ll see the ghosts!” I hate that.
Well, at least she found the bones of the other kids at the orphanage. If I were her, I’d be feeling extra lucky that I was adopted before this shit happened.
Prop the door open, lady! What a horrible idea to hang out in a little closet with little ghost children running around.
Dude, I could’ve told her that kid died down there. That child was HIV positive living in a basement for 9 months without his meds. That boy clearly did not survive.
But there IS a kind of twist! Okay. I’m okay with that. This is far more acceptable than, “She was just nuts all along la-di-dah.”
Okay. Final thoughts? I thought this was going to score much lower. It uses a lot of different types of horror tropes that mislead the watcher a bit. Is this a possession story? Is this a revenge story? Is it a “She was driven insane by the loss of her child so no one will believe her” story? What?
I liked the ending. I think ending it any other way would’ve been obnoxious and ridiculous. I like that she made the choice rather than the ghosts killing her or something in the house killing her. I’d recommend this one. It was interesting throughout; it didn’t have a million annoying jump scares; it was just interesting all the way through. Did a good job of holding my attention and genuinely kept me wondering, “So where the hell IS this kid!? Where’d the put him?!”
I do still hate that you had to believe in them to see them, though. That’s the most annoying thing.
ESE: 87/100
50 +5 for super cool wallpaper-rip opening credits -5 for the weird old lady jog +5 for the treasure hunt -5 for slapping Simón +10 for the medium scene -5 for “You have to believe in them to see them” bullshit +2 for mouse +5 for the little doll party +5 for the opening credits foreshadowing +10 for the excellent ending and not ending up ultra-predictable and lame
