#macs thoughts

[hornytome]

there’s something so fucking hot about the idea of him swapping between our holes, fucking us both until we’re begging for him to cum in us

[hornytome]

the only thing that would fix me rn is him cumming inside me

[hornytome]

i know he jerks off to the thought of us, and i’d kill to know what he thinks about. does he think about burying his cock in her pussy? does he think about having me face down, ass up, fucking me until i’m screaming his name? does he imagine my lips wrapped around his cock, looking up at him with adoration?

[hornytome]

i have hot and spicy kink feelings about taking the condom off during sex, to be explored further lol

[hornytome]

are the three of you together now

That is a negative, soldier. Too many unanswered questions and impossibilities. For greater frame of reference, though problematic, this is all very much giving Call Me By Your Name, Portrait of a Lady on Fire. Temporary ephemeral connection in the face of unfortunate realities type beat.

[hornytome]

he’s so reserved and shy, so seeing him fuck me however he wants, as fast and rough as he wants, would probably make me cum on the spot

[hornytome]

mid june.

we laid in bed together. that’s how it always seemed to start. the premise going forward was simple. promising that we would relegate ourselves to just cuddling, just kissing. their heads on my chest provided a steady pressure. his legs were intertwined with mine, and she found the cracks and crevices to slide her feet into, maximizing contact. they smiled at each other from across my shoulders. we could waste hours doing this, as we had before. time seems to slip away when we’re together. it unnerves me deeply. i think it makes all of us feel like that.

their hands were on each others hips, thumbs rubbing slow circles. his foot was doing the same on my calf. her foot rested on mine in the way that she likes. slow, even breathing filled the room. no one spoke, too afraid of breaking the quiet magic happening in the room. everything was warm and golden from the sunlight streaming in. the blond in their hair lit up with the sun.

we had all staunchly agreed. only kissing and cuddling. no sex.

so… why was he hard against my hip right now? he was doing his best to be subtle, hips cocked back slightly to avoid announcing it too loudly. i pretended to adjust, shifting my hips to make full contact. he hissed through his teeth. playing dumb was to my advantage here. i felt his length in the crook of my hip. he was embarrassingly hard. his thin pajama pants weren’t doing their job of hiding it. i shifted, purposely rubbing my hip against his length.

he sighed. “my self control is very thin right now, guys.”

i sucked in a breath as his lungs emptied. my hips wiggled a little more.

the hand on her hip moved to my waist. i heard her breathing speed up as she processed what was happening. a calf wrapped around mine, and i realized it was for leverage. he buried his face in my neck, breathing out as his hips slowly started grinding against me. he moaned openly into my neck. her hand moved to grab his ass, encouraging his hips that were stuttering against me. seeing him enjoy himself was… nice. letting him use me to feel good felt nice. i didn’t feel used, at the same time. if that makes sense. he shucked off his pants, leaving only his boxers between us. i think she and i understood this was something we’re giving him. focusing on him, his pleasure. we’re not sure if someone’s ever just focused on him, his body, whether he feels good or not. i have this inescapable urge to show him how beautiful he is. it felt good to give him this. his arm wrapped around my whole body, sinking deeper into my side. he seemed so relaxed and unselfconscious. he got impossibly harder as he slid against me. i could feel the underside of his head rubbing against the seam of my shorts. a dark wet spot on his boxers made feel insane.

i wanted this to happen so, so badly.

i slowly sat up, lazily hopping over her. i pulled off her panties. he tried to pretend he wasn’t curious, but i handed him the underwear to show him our handiwork. from behind her, i pressed her against his front, hiking her leg up over his hips. i slotted in behind her, spooning her with both of us facing him. his arm that was pinned to the bed came to rest under our heads. i pulled his cock free from his boxers. he involuntarily moaned as my hand touched him. getting them as close as i could, i had the perfect angle to hold his cock and slide the head against her pussy.

“like a credit card,” she laughed.

“right now?” he chuckled incredulously.

the laughing was quickly replaced with sharp inhales as i rubbed his head along her clit, the most sensitive parts of their bodies making direct contact. their foreheads came together, sharing the same air. their heavy breathing was starting to fill the room. i circled her clit a couple times.

“please, please”

“shit, please, just—“

they spoke in unison.

i positioned the tip of his cock at her entrance. he was leaking precum, but the head of his cock became even shinier as her wetness started to coat him. i didn’t have the patience in the moment to tease either of them. we all wanted this so bad—there wasn’t room for torturing any of us further.

he slipped in so easily. his head jerked forward into her shoulder. this is the first time he’s felt pussy with no condom in, what? a year? he was practically whimpering. i set the pace, a slow sleepy grind. i settled in behind her, he and i making eye contact over her head. he smiled at me. genuinely and openly. his hips slowly started fucking into her. he was clearly enjoying the friction of her pussy on the sensitive tip of his cock. slow but deep strokes hit her g-spot every time, if the noises she made meant anything. we laid their as they slowly fucked each other. i brushed the hair out of their eyes, ran my hands down their sides. my hands slid down to hold his balls, enjoying the soft skin.

“oh shit…” he hissed, fucking into her particularly deep.

we laid there for an undetermined amount of time. i just enjoyed listening to their noises as they enjoyed each other. i studied his face, the way his eyes were screwed shut and his mouth hung open. she, similarly, was lost. her head alternated between laying on my shoulder and pressing against his forehead. they were gorgeous. with my free hand, i cupped her forehead and pushed the hair back, moving then to his face and slowly rubbing my thumb across his cheekbone. despite being lost in each other, they both leaned into my touch. my presence felt integral to what they were experiencing, and that made me very, very happy. they were as lost in me as each other. the slow grind of 3 bodies alone in a room was a welcome and stark relief from the ridiculous year of turmoil we went though to get here.

his breathing was slowly picking up. she was voicing a constant stream of moans. his hand came up to brace under her knee, deepening the angle. his hand that was resting somewhere above my head came down to cup my face. we all got closer, our bodies tied together.

“i’m getting closer,” he breathed. rather than bracing with his hand, he hauled us closer, throwing over an arm that reached across both of us, calves once again finding purchase by wrapping around ours. his hand on my face shifted, and he brought his thumb to the entrance of my mouth. i accepted it, sucking as he lost his composure. the pace of his hips reached a fever pitch, and the obscene noise of his balls slapping against her wet pussy filled the room. i couldn’t help myself when i grabbed the back of his neck, slamming our mouths together. our teeth clacked but the vibrations of his moans quickly made up for the jarring feeling. i wanted to feel and hear the noises he makes when he cums.

i pulled away briefly, only to quietly mumble “please cum in her, please.”

“oh shit, oh shit, i’m cumming—“

his body jerked and she cried out as his hips slammed into hers a final time. he was unabashedly moaning and keening as he bottomed out. he stilled, letting his cum pump into her. i moved my freehand from his neck down to where he was inside of her. i could feel his cock pulsing as he came. she was shaking as he filled her up. she looked vaguely like she was going to cry. i knew she was having a good time.

they laid there, collapsed and panting. their lips found each other, lazily kissing as their breathing returned to normal. watching their mouths slide together was like staring at the sun. it made me feel warm. i bided my time by laying kisses across her shoulders and drawing patterns on his tummy.

they slowly pulled apart. we laid there as her breathing settled into a sleepy rhythm. he was still inside of her with no particular plans to pull out. i stretched, feeling the release of sticky skin and joints that were in one position for too long. i wormed my way back into their warm bodies. his arm and mine were thrown across the others hip, over her body. we made eye contact as our eyes struggled to stay open. he gave my hip a squeeze. the last thing i thought of before i drifted off is how excited i am for summer.

[hornytome]

no one makes sappy poly threesome f/ftm/m fics and it’s slowly killing me.

i’ve been writing again, he’s here for the summer now and my brain is on fire. like. so horny i can’t focus on anything.

i know my content got a hell of a lot more niche all of a sudden, so much love to those who are sticking around for the utter clown show/fanfiction that my life is these days.

i was thinking about how this blog is essentially a chronicle of my sexuality and gender. in great detail. i started it when i was younger, before i’d had sex with anyone, or dated anyone (i was 18, so no worries. not too young.) i was hyper sexual for various reasons. i still identified as a bisexual woman. at least, that’s the label i accepted at the time. then i met Edith. she deeply impacted this blog and helped shape the person i am today. more on that later.

as i grew in our relationship, i shifted to identifying as a she/they lesbian. i was very, very confused at this time. i held no real confidence or investment in my identity.

i moved closer and closer to masculinity, contextualizing that by identifying as a butch stone top lesbian. my activity on tumblr was at its peak here. this was the point i started gaining confidence. the masculinity felt right through the lens of butchness. being a lesbian felt like a box i had to check to have an excuse to be this masculine.

so, that brings us to last summer. we are happily existing as a butch femme couple, absolutely clueless to the cosmic ass whooping we were about to receive.

a uni friend Edith had known for a while suddenly became a bigger part of our lives. he met Edith shortly before i did, actually. hanging out more, parties (like, BBQs, we aren’t partiers 😭). we had him over for dinner, and the tension was comically thick for NO REASON. i barely knew him at this point and it was the longest we’d talked. honestly. this was the 1st time we’d hung out alone and the chemistry was actually slightly unnerving between the three of us.

so, the way i break this down is there were 2 significant evenings. the first night we had him over for dinner: unbeknownst to each other, edith and i were essentially having identical OCD obsessions (something to talk about later, how my ocd impacts my gender) about not being lesbians, being attracted to him, having a threesome with him. we were both extremely committed to the bit of being lesbians, but we were both having these internal breakdowns about it.

in between the first and second dinner, we almost threw up admitting what had been going on.

then, there’s the god forsaken second dinner. i cringe when i think of it, mostly. it was a clumsy proposition on our part. he turned us down, very sweetly. we shocked him so bad he started doing the dishes. there was crazy stuff going on for him at the time, so it was a cherry on top situation.

for unrelated life plot reasons, we couldn’t see him until march. it was about a week long visit.

it was amazing. it feels like something beyond just fuck buddies and it scares me immensely. all of us did comment that we weren’t seeking this, whatever it is, out in any way. while visiting, he reaffirmed that there were no feelings, leaving it an open question. i lied through my teeth, personally—“of course not.” i’m not sure about his truthfulness. more on that later.

it felt like a week long date with a ridiculous amount of sex. it was frustratingly tender and ephemeral and profound.

the visit ended, and it hasn’t been until now that he’s been close again. for the summer.

this all feels too real to be a fuck buddy situation. it feels too tender and good and warm to just be about fucking.

anyways, looping back massively, upon realizing i was sexually attracted to him, i realized i’m transmasc at the very least. i say this because i can’t admit i’m probably a man. finding my bisexuality through this was like coming home. i’ve never been romantically attracted to a man before him, and this experience further drove home my bisexuality. i keep telling myself i’m only mildly in love with him.

regardless, he leaves for much longer at the end of summer. a lot longer. so we’ll have this summer.