#magical mishaps

[twokinds-es]

Magical Mishaps

Muchas gracias por la espera, después de 29 días esta mini historia termino, solo queda espera cuando sale una segunda parte y poder saber en que nuevas situaciones incomodas van a poner a Sythe XD, si quieren descargarla pueden hacerlo en el post de descarga (link), el cual acabo de actualizar para aparte de links de me mega también haya de drive.

Publicación original "Patreon"

(Traducido y subido por Spark)

(Saludos del equipo de Twokinds-es)

[all-the-fanfic]

Little Overlooked Dreams (6819 words) by Lunette3002 Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Batman - All Media Types Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Tim Drake & Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake & Jason Todd, Tim Drake & Dick Grayson, Tim Drake & Damian Wayne, Tim Drake & Alfred Pennyworth Characters: Tim Drake, Bruce Wayne, Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Damian Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth Summary:

Tim weighed his options. He was alone at night in some alleyway in Gotham. He had nothing except the clothes left on the ground by someone and the cloak wrapped around his skinny shoulders. His camera was nowhere in sight. His backpack was gone too.

He brought the device to his ear. “Hello?”

Whatever talking had been on the other end of the line immediately cut off at his hesitant greeting.

“Who is this?”

[hayanwulf]

Ironstrange Dinosaur AU

(YouTube fed me with Jurassic Park and Jurassic World shorts while I was trying to study, so here I come; since you're very aware of my obsession with turning everything into Ironstrange)

Tony is a T. rex and Stephen is a Spinosaurus. Enemies to lovers.

Went for a magical mishap instead of a full dinosaur AU.

Tony, the six-ton apex predator, was sulking.

Well, as much as a T. rex could sulk. Which is to say, he was stomping in circles around a patch of ferns, muttering to himself while occasionally snapping at a dragonfly like it owed him child support.

“This is your fault,” he grumbled, trying and failing to scratch his snout with his comically inadequate arms. “I got violated by your stupid fossil, and now I’ve got scales and no fingers!”

Across the clearing, a much sleeker, currently sparklier from a display of attempted magic, and definitely wetter Spinosaurus dwelled half-submerged in a swamp, watching Tony like he was the stupidest carnivore to ever live — which, Tony wanted to take offense to that, but given their current situation, was not entirely unfair.

“Remind me which one of us has given firm, clear, multiple warnings about not touching unknown relics in the Sanctum, and which one of us went ahead and made a wish to the Chronos Fang?” Stephen squinted down at his claws that seemed unable to summon more magic than a few bright sparks. Tony imagined that, if dinosaurs could frown, that was the expression Stephen was making right then. “And now we’re dinosaurs, and I have algae in places I didn’t know existed.”

Tony huffed. “You’re just mad because it turned you into a water lizard. Bet you smell like low tide and bad decisions.”

“I am semi-aquatic,” Stephen snapped. “And I have claws longer than your entire forearm. Don’t talk to me about bad decisions, Mr. I-can’t-keep-my-hands-to-myself. At least this had one good merit, and you won’t be causing me anymore trouble with those non-existent hands while I fix this.”

Stephen ignored the glare Tony directed at him, and went back to his attempts at summoning magic. The only thing that was preventing Tony from quipping back was the fact that it was entirely his fault that they were here.

He mentally amended — no, not entirely his fault — after all it was Stephen who had left the suspiciously fossil-like relic all out in the open for the scientist in Tony to be naturally drawn to it. But they could argue all about that when they were back home again, safe, sound and scaleless.

“...Okay,” Tony said, breaking the silence between them that had stretched for way too long, “But real talk, have you seen yourself? That spine thing? It’s working for you.”

Stephen blinked. “What?”

Tony awkwardly shuffled closer. “Just saying. You’ve got the whole majestic swamp dragon thing going on. It’s weirdly hot. In a terrifying, prehistoric way.”

Stephen stared.

Tony coughed. “Not that I’m into scaly wizard fish or anything, but y’know. If I were, you’d be... uh, top tier.”

There was a long pause. Then Stephen slowly rose from the swamp, water cascading off his scaled hide, and stepped closer. “Tony,” he said, low and dangerous.

Tony tried to look casual, which was difficult when one’s arms were the size of breadsticks and their body weighed more than a pickup truck. “Yeah?”

“You have a fern stuck in your teeth.”

Tony gurgled in horror.

[romione-trope-fest]

The Truth of It

The Truth of It

By HPFanTed

  A Magical Mishap

  Ron has one of those days where nothing goes right. It’s chaos and carnage from the beginning, here’s hoping there’s a silver otter lining for the pandemonium the poor fella has had to endure.

Kudos always to KateNotEight! The bestest beta, who has the patience of a grammatical saint and writes wonderful Romione ❤️

3k words - Chapter 1 of 2

Rating: M (language)

  *************************************************************************

  There was a hubbub of disjointed chatter in the potions classroom, a clear indication that Professor Slughorn did not hold the 6th year student’s attention. The cauldrons were bubbling with potions of varying levels of success, and apart from Harry’s, none of them looked even remotely acceptable. 

  Neville had a dark green sludge trying to escape its pewter confines, Seamus and Dean were displaying a great show of teamwork as they stoked and dampened their fire while passionately discussing the finer details of last week’s Quidditch match, while Hermione pushed frizzy hair from her face counting clockwise motions. 

  “Right then, everyone. Settle down, settle down. Next, we need to locate the fire seeds. I’ve left a selection of various seed-like ingredients on your benches. We find the correct ones by gently touching it to the very tip of the tongue. You should feel a gentle warmth, like you’ve eaten a Scotch Bonnet.” The Professor instructed as he meandered between their stations. “Give it a go, then.”

  “What the hell does she even see in that idiot McLaggen? What would they even talk about?” Ron said in hushed angry whispers. “Shit, what did Slug say?”

  “Dunno.” Harry looked up from his text book. He’d buried his head the minute Ron started to discuss Cormac for the hundredth time. “Something about checking seeds?” He looked around the room and watched Ernie lick a small brown sphere. “Eat it? I’m not sure, let me check what the Prince says.” 

  Ron lifted a seed from the first pile and popped it in his mouth before crunching down on it. “Ugh, aniseed. Gross! What am I supposed to be looking for here, mate?” 

  “Dunno.” Harry repeated, flicking through his intricately annotated textbook. Ron lifted a red seed from the pile. “WAIT…” but the warning was too late. 

 Ron’s eyes bulged as his neck and then face exploded in puce patterns that resembled fireworks across his pale skin. His lower lip trembled and there was already wetness running down his cheeks as he tried to stifle an overwhelming urge to cough. Harry watched in horror as his best mate eventually spluttered, tears and snot suddenly dribbling down his face as he mouthed helplessly for support. “Sir! Sir, over here!” Harry shouted. 

  “Oh Wallenby! I said touch it lightly to the tip of your tongue! Honestly, there’s always one.” Slughorn rolled his eyes as he crowded their table. Other students started to take notice. “You don’t put a whole fire seed in your mouth!” 

  Harry felt a wave of annoyance as Hermione smirked at the situation. Her reaction irked him even more than the Slytherins who were elbowing one another and sniggering. 

  Ron now looked like a volcano about to erupt, sweat beading on his brow. His hair seemed to stand on end as the heat continued to rise – his neck and ears matching his bright red face, and Harry wondered if that was from sheer embarrassment. A cough escaped and thick black smoke billowed with it, Ron’s eyes pleaded with his best mate and professor for help as he clamped his hands over his mouth. “Oh Merlin, you’ve bitten into it haven’t you, my boy?! Come to the store. Back to work, the rest of you!” Slughorn tutted as he trotted to the supply room and disappeared to the back shelves. Ron and Harry followed, hoovering anxiously in the entranceway.

  “Help…” Ron croaked and another puff of smoke signalled his distress. 

  “I didn’t see anything in the book, Ron. Sorry! How about some water?” Ron nodded frantically, clawing at his throat. Harry searched the shelves urgently and found bottles to his left, “Tergeo”, he siphoned off the existing potion before filling it with water, “Auguamenti.” 

  Before Ron’s trembling fingers could reach for the drink he so desperately craved, he croaked, spluttered and choked on another cloud of smoke. No longer contained, it spewed from him like an old exhaust with every bark he was forced to make. The store room suddenly filled with blackness, like someone had dropped peruvian instant darkness powder. Ron could barely breathe. The force of his coughing fit had him stumble backwards, suddenly panicking in the gloom. His back hit the shelves behind him with some force and he ducked as bottles started to fall and smash at his feet. 

  “Oh Wallenby. For Merlin’s sake.” Professor Slughorn tutted, some distance to his right. “Stand back lads.” He instructed and a flash of yellow was seen in the haze just before the smoke began to dissipate. 

  “You ok mate?” Harry asked, but Ron shook his head. 

  “You lot need to clear this mess up!” Slughorn waved his hand at the smashed bottles and psychedelic pattern of potions at their feet. 

  “I’ll do it, Sir.” Harry offered, turning his own wand to the mess. 

  Ron couldn’t think of anything other than the intense craving, no need, for water. Like a man stranded in the desert lurching towards a mirage, he grabbed the bottle from the shelf beside Harry. His chest burned, his throat scorched with dust. He chugged it down desperately. 

  The relief was instant, the fire in his throat extinguished, leaving only the residual numbness of someone who had consumed a remarkably spicy pepper. He gasped in air and took another gulp before returning the stopper and shoving it into his robes.

  “Ok, now, don’t be alarmed but I don’t have any murtlap essence, must have run out.” Slughorn grumbled. “But a pint of milk will do the same job. Why don’t you take him to the kitchen, Potter? I’ll deal with the rest of this. Just keep your mouth shut and try not to set anything on fire.” Slughorn ushered them through the classroom, both boys intent on avoiding eye contact with their classmates. They were basically shoved out the door of the dungeon room and left alone unceremoniously in the cold hall.  

  “Any better?” Harry asked, concerned for his best friend. 

  “No! Feel like the inside of my skull is on fire.”

  “You’ve stopped smoking though, that’s good.” Harry said encouragingly.

  “That water helped a bit, cheers mate. Think it put the actual fire out, it’s more of a…a smouldering feeling now. Need milk.” Ron wheezed.  

  “We really need to start paying attention in class.” Harry sighed as the boys headed towards the basement. 

  “Did Hermione see?” Ron asked nervously, running a hand through his hair.

  “Yeah mate, she saw.” 

  “Bloody hell.” He said deflated. 

  “Does that bother you?” Harry asked.

  “That the girl I fancy saw me nearly implode because I was an idiot and ate a fire seed? Of course that bothers me.” 

  Harry stopped in his tracks. Ron walked on for a few steps before noticing and spun around to look at him. 

  “We’re talking about Hermione here, not Lavender?” Harry checked. 

  “Yes.” Ron answered impatiently. 

  “Since when do you fancy Hermione?” Harry asked, confused. 

  “I’m not sure exactly. But when I saw her petrified I knew I’d do anything to get her back. And then, there was that moment, when I saw her walking down the stairs to meet that git, Krum, at the Yule ball. It felt like my heart stopped beating for a minute, maybe two…” Ron gasped and covered his mouth with a shaking hand. 

  Harry stared at his best mate in shock and utter disbelief. “Ron, come here.” He grabbed his arm and pulled him over to the entrance of the kitchen. Pointing at the painting on the door, “Tell me that pear is purple.” 

  “That pear is p…p…p…pu…” Ron’s face contorted wildly, his lips pursed to make a ‘P’ sound but his tongue clearly would not obey. “pu…pu…purp…GREEEEEEN! THAT PEAR IS GREEN.” He finally wailed. Ron pushed both hands into his hair and gripped tightly, stepping backwards away from the offending portrait until his back hit the opposite wall. 

  “Ron, I don’t think you drank water in Slughorn’s store.” Harry suggested gently. 

  “No, I don’t suppose it was.” He mewled. “Colourless…odourless. Harry, I think I’ve swallowed a shit load of Veritaserum.”

  “Right, well, er…I can only deal with one disaster at a time. Do you still need milk?” 

  “Yeah, my brain is burning.” 

  “Come on.” Harry eyed him wearily, clearly concerned that he might combust or, equally as terrifying, spill his deepest darkest secrets at his feet like vomit. He turned and tickled the green pear to access the kitchens.

  Harry repeatedly requested milk from the house elves, and Dobby, as always, was overly keen to help. Ron seemed to down gallons of milk before he stopped to take a breath. As the effects of biting into the fireseed wore off, the scorching redness on his skin thawed. “Ok mate, what next?” Harry asked as Ron wiped his mouth with a tea towel.

  “I want this potion out of my system. I’m a verbal bomb about to explode. You’ve got to help me! And for the love of Merlin, do not ask me anything you don’t want to know the answer to!” Ron pleaded. 

  “Oh don’t worry about that. I have absolutely no interest in hearing anything you don’t want to share.” Harry truly sympathised, he couldn’t think of anything worse than Ron interrogating him under the influence of veritaserum. Not when he’s had such impure thoughts of said best friend’s little sister. Harry shuddered at the thought. “I’ve no idea if there is a cure for truth serum and I left all our stuff in the dungeon, no textbook. Want to go back?”

  “No bloody way.”

  “You know who might know…” Harry offered cautiously.

  “No bloody way!” Ron answered ferociously. 

  “Ok, ok. Just saying. She would know if there was a cure.” He held his hands up in defence. 

  “Of course she would. Knows bloody everything, doesn’t she?! Let’s just go to the common room. Try and avoid talking to anyone.” 

  “Ok, although class has just finished. We need to get moving.” Harry said, checking his watch. 

  Ron nodded curtly and the boys left the warm kitchen, bidding farewell to Dobby, hoping to navigate the castle with minimum interaction before reaching the sanctuary of their dorm. Harry could make up some excuse about Ron feeling poorly from the fireseed and the rest of the lads would surely leave him alone. Maybe this will all be over in a few hours, he thought optimistically.

  “Won-Won.” A screech came from behind them just as they passed the Great Hall, causing both boys to stop dead in their tracks. “I heard you were hurt in potions class, are you ok my lovely Won-Won?” Ron didn’t turn, merely winced sideways at Harry as his girlfriend tackled him from behind, squeezing him in a bone crushing hug. 

  “Help!” Ron mouthed silently. Harry shrugged in response, equally as helpless. Any hope of making it out of this situation alive, died in the pit of his stomach as he saw the look of sheer terror in his best friend’s eyes. But what could he do? Of all people to encounter – it had to be the dreaded girlfriend! 

  “Tell me what happened, darling! I’ve been so worried about you!” She gushed.

  “I ate a fireseed and set myself on fire. All sorted now though. No big deal. We’ve got to go.” He tried to wriggle free from her embrace.  

  “Ugh Won, can’t you spare 5 minutes for your doting girlfriend? I just want to make sure you’re ok.” She whined as she circled around him. 

  “Ah no. I can’t. I really really can’t.” He pleaded.

  “Why not?” She huffed. “Maybe I could help.” Lavender ran her hand up his tie and pulled his face towards hers. “Or would that make you even hotter?” Harry became very interested in the portrait beside him, desperately wishing he could join the drunken monks rather than be privy to this mortifying situation. 

  “No, it wouldn’t make me hotter! Snogging you is the very last thing I want to do right now. In fact, I don’t think I ever want to snog you again!” Ron blurted out, his eyes wide as he tried to prevent further secrets from spilling by biting his inner cheeks.

  Lavender took a step backwards, stunned. “What are you saying? You don’t want to be my boyfriend anymore?” Her arms crossed confrontationally. 

  He scrubbed his hands hard over his face and through his hair as he tried to prevent the inevitable. But the truth was bubbling inside him. He felt it from the soles of his feet – pressure building, and the geyser had to erupt. “N…n…n…NOoooooooooooo! I don’t! I don’t want to be your boyfriend or your Won-Won or your darling!” He shouted. 

  “WHAT?! Since when?!” She stamped her foot, hands balling into fists at her sides. “Because you didn’t mind snogging me in front of the whole common room last night, or any other night for the last few months!” She fumed. 

  “Since I opened that Merlin awful Christmas present from you. That’s the problem – all we’ve ever done is snog! You don’t know me! How you could think I would EVER wear a gold chain with MY SWEETHEART around my neck is beyond me! It’s the most horrendous thing I’ve EVER seen. My Aunt Muriel wouldn’t wear that thing at her own funeral! And you should see the hideous crap she wears!” The harsh, honest words fell from his lips like hostile spitfire.

  Lavender couldn’t speak, her stunned expression morphed into anger and as her brows knitted together, she raised her hand. The slap Ron received seemed to reverberate between the stone walls making Harry wince. “YOU ABSOLUTE ASS, RON WEASLEY.” 

  “Yeah, sounds about right.” He nodded sadly as he rubbed the biting sting on his cheek. “No more questions. We’ve gotta get out of here.” He grabbed Harry by his jumper and started to run before she could speak again. “I’m sorry, Lav…never meant to hurt you!” He shouted over his shoulder. 

  “I hate you!” She sobbed back as they rounded the corner.

  They didn’t stop running, they pushed through groups of students, took sets of stairs two steps at a time and did a full 180 when they spotted Dean, Neville and Seamus at the end of a long hallway. Eventually on the 6th floor, they came to a cataclysmic end as they collided with the tall, pale, horrified face of Draco Malfoy. The force of the crash sent all three of the lads reeling, each landing on their backside.

  “What the hell?! Can’t you watch where you’re going Potter!” Draco sneered.

  “Why don’t you watch where YOU’RE going Malfoy?” Ron retaliated. 

  “Oh very clever, Weasel. You’re aware you two idiots bumped into me?!”

  “Yes we’re aware!” Ron answered truthfully but tinged with venom. “What are you doing so far from home, shouldn’t you be locked up in the dungeons with the rest of scumbag Slytherin?”

  “I’ll go wherever I please in this castle. I’ve more right to roam these halls than you, blood traitor.”

  “What did you just call me, you filthy little ferret?” Ron scrambled to reach Malfoy, but Harry grabbed him around his waist, pinning his arms to his sides. “Get off, Harry, I need to hit something and his slimy face is right there.”

  “That’s it, keep your boyfriend on a leash, Potter.” Drawled Draco.

  “I wouldn’t, Malfoy…” Harry warned as he struggled to contain Ron. 

  “Boyfriend!? Jealous are we?! At least he’s got mates Malfoy, where’s your goons? Finally had enough of your precious blood status bullshit? Or are they not good enough for you now? Heard you need a very fucking special mark to play with you now.” Ron exploded. 

  “Shut up, Weasley, you don’t know what you’re talking about.” But his pale fingers tugged on the left sleeve of his robes. 

  “I know exactly what I’m talking about. You’ve been strutting around this castle like you own the place. Taking special swagger lessons from Snape?! You both have that greasy bat flutter thing going on. Bet he’s a real nice mark too.”

  “At least I own something! It’s no surprise you bumped into me, even after 6 years you’re still getting lost, this place must feel enormous compared to the hovel you ginger haired losers have to crawl out of.” Draco spat.  

  “My family might not be as well off as yours, Malfoy, but they are good, honest, hard working people. Your lot have sold their souls for gold. They’ve broomsticks stuck so far up their arses they couldn’t bend to give you a hug. Is that why you’re an evil little git now?”

  “Even that brother of yours? What’s his name? You know the one brown nosing the minister? Father sees them regularly, he’s ashamed to be a Weasley!” 

  “P…P…Percy.” Ron spat through taught lips. “Your Dad…you mean the world’s ugliest veela? You’re up to something Malfoy and we’re onto you, you piece of shit.”

  Harry watched as a flicker of uncertainty flashed across Draco’s face, enough to let him know Ron was right. 

  “Malfoy, why don’t you just shove off! You’ve 5 seconds before I let him go.” Harry intervened, still struggling to contain Ron. 

  Malfoy sneered at the pair of them but obviously decided two on one was a bad idea, he got to his feet and hovered over them like the pretentious bastard he was. “Watch yourselves boys, you’re not as clever as you think you are. Especially now the mudblood won’t even hang out with you.” 

  “That’s it…gerroff me Harry!” Ron lunged forward, getting onto his knees despite Harry hanging off him. Malfoy took a step backwards in shock before turning on his heel and running down the hall. “Yeah…you better run! Don’t you ever call her that again! I’ll beat the living shit out of you disgusting blood puredick.”

  As Draco’s footsteps echoed before falling away to silence, Ron slumped against Harry. Exhausted from the relentless righteousness. Harry’s restraint turned into somewhat of a platonic hug.  

  “Puredick?” He questioned with a smirk. 

  “I dunno, Harry, I can’t control it.” Ron laughed. 

  They sat on the floor a moment longer, neither willing to move and begin another situation. “You ok, mate?” Harry asked gently. “Nah, not really. Fuck, that was horrible. Not Malfoy, wee prick had it coming but what I did to Lavender. I wanted to break up with her but not like that. She didn’t deserve that.” Ron groaned. 

  “Maybe a silver lining?”

  “Maybe.” He said sadly.

  “Enjoyed arguing with ferret boy.” He grinned, significantly brighter. “Why didn’t you let me hit him?” 

  Harry raised his eyebrow. “Do you really want to be taken to Snape after drinking half a bottle of veritaserum?”

  “No! Fuck. Good point. Thanks, mate.” Ron clapped him on shoulder before standing and offering his hand. 

  “No worries.” He said as Ron pulled him back to his feet. “Where the hell are we?”  

  “Miles from the common room, that’s for sure.” Ron groaned. 

  “You know where we need to go, right? She’ll know what to do. She’ll help.” Harry maintained.

  “Yes, FINE! Library it is.” He finally conceded. 

[epiccloud27]

Hicvember Day 7: Magical Mishaps

Hey guys! This technically could've counted for failed cures, but I figured it'd work better for magical. Honestly, this fic was what inspired me to suggest this prompt to replace the originally duplicated prompt :)

Our main characters today are Artemia, Ollie, Herman, a quick cameo from Dennis, and Hyland

CW: hiccups, mention of dog vomit, not much to tag honestly

Obligatory tagging of my beloved/p: @hiccuping-daydreams

And without further ado, I give you...

ApoIlo's Slight Hiccup! Enjoy!

Fandom: EPlC, Modern AU

Artemia was waving at one of the last couple of guests for the day. She sighed in contentment. Today had been a rewarding day. She loved to see all the happy mortals relax with dogs and snacks.

Now as it was approaching closing time, she'd switched the open sign to closed before addressing her employees.

“Good work today, you two,” Artemia smiled.

Herman struck a pose while puckering his lips, “I do good work every day, dawling.”

Dennis chuckled at their antics before nodding, “thanks, Artie.”

Artemia nodded as she watched a few stragglers look for dog supplies in the store area. Suddenly, her phone started ringing with a familiar ring tone. Fishing out her phone from her pocket, she smiled at the caller ID being her brother.

She tapped accept before holding the phone to her ear, “Hey twinzie-”

“Temi!” His voice seemed urgent. “I need-” his voice cut out for a bit before he continued, “your help, it's an emergen–cy, please!”

“I'm on my way,” Artemia was already grabbing her keys, “remind me where are you now?”

He mentioned a city that was in a whole different state. Artemia turned to Herman, “Okay…we'll be there soon, bye.”

As he was questioning who she was bringing, she hung up the phone, “Herman?” She waved them over.

Herman walked over to her, voice lowered, “what is it, dawling?”

“I need you to get me somewhere…fast,” Artemia pleaded to him, whispering, “‘Pollo's in trouble and he's miles away and a car won't get me there in time and-”

“Alright, alright, breathe,” Herman placed a hand on her shoulder, “let's go find your twin.”

Taking her hand, he led her out the door, leaving Dennis watching and calling out to them sarcastically, “yeah! I'll just handle closing! Don't worry about it!” Just as a little girl told her about a dog who just threw up.

Dennis slumped. It was going to be a long night.

Meanwhile, miles and miles away, Ollie was pacing back and forth backstage–aka, a storage space in the back of the bar he was performing at tonight–fiddling with his lyre as he waited for his sister. He had an entire audience out there waiting for him, he couldn't let them all down.

But how was he supposed to use his voice if it was compromised?

“Sweetie?”

And then there was the mortal he was dating, Hyland. He couldn't let him see him like this. Especially because he was unaware of his status as an immortal being.

“I'm fine!” Ollie called before quickly muffling another hiccup, watching the lights flickering in response.

“It's just hiccups,” Hyland reminded him. “And they're pretty quiet, I'm sure the four people in this bar won't even notice.”

“You'll notice,” Ollie pouted, jolting with a silent hiccup.

“Because I know you have them,” Hyland raised an eyebrow, “also? I can sense you pouting through the door.”

“Shu-huck-t up,” Ollie whined at the audible hiccup that made the light shine even brighter before dimming.

“This bar has really bad lighting,” Hyland muttered as he looked up curiously.

Suddenly, Artemia and Herman walked into the bar, the former looking around concernedly, “Ollie?! Where are you!?”

Ollie heard Artemia's calls and looked at the door, “Hyland…Hy–land, that's my si-hip-ster!”

Hyland looked at the white-haired girl and waved her over. Artemia, and by extension Herman, both walked over, though the relative moved a bit faster.

“Is Ollie okay?” Artemia looked at Hyland before just barging through him and opening the door, “Ollie?!”

“I'm right here,” Ollie waved before he was bombarded with a hug from Artemia.

“Ollie, what's wrong? Are you ok? What happened?” Artemia held him at arms’ length, moving him around, checking for any injuries. “Where does it hurt?”

“Temi, I'm fi–ine,” Ollie reassured her.

Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, seeing the lights flicker, “but…you sounded so urgent on the phone…”

“I wanted to make sure you ca–ame,” Ollie looked a little sheepish, “but I still need your help…”

Artemia groaned and crossed her arms, “with what?”

“I got the hick…hiccups,” Ollie pouted.

Artemia blinked and stared at him in utter disbelief. “Are…are you serious?” She gripped him up by the collar, "You call me in a panic, making me leave poor Dio to close up shop just to tell me you got a case of hiccups?!”

“T-to be fair hip-uh, I'm going on sta–age in like te–en min-nk-nutes,” Ollie stammered, frightened by the anger radiating off of her, “and I can–can't go out there with the light–s going off every time I HI'UP!-” a light bulb nearby shattered. “every time I HUP!” another light bulb shattered.

“I get it,” Artemia huffed and let him go, lowering her voice, “you don't want to hurt the mortals.”

“...totally-hick-y,” Ollie said unconvincingly before noticing Herman in the background, flirting with Hyland. “What is he doin–ing here?”

“How do you think I got here so fast?” Artemia raised an eyebrow before turning to Herman, “Herm? Stop flirting with them and get over here!”

Herman groaned before waving charmingly to Hyland and heading inside the storage room, closing the door behind her. “Sup, Olliver?”

Ollie glared at Herman, “it's just hip…Ollie. An–nd now you're try–ing to steal my boy–fr–friend?” He patted his chest after those quick silent hiccups.

“It's just harmless flirting,” Herman raised an eyebrow, “and I'm happily committed to my relationship with Ti, dawling.”

“Guys- wait, boyfriend?” Artemia paused her train of thought. “You never told me you had a boyfriend…”

“Uhhh…I di—idn't?” Ollie tilted his head.

“What's going on with the lights in this place?” Herman commented.

“Can we fo–cus on getting rid of hup! these?” Ollie slumped, “I'm perform-hingk! soon an–d I think it's getting wor-HRK!-orse…”

Herman startled at hearing a broken bulb, “dawling, you're doing this whole thing with the lights?”

Artemia pinched her nose, “Ollie, what have you tried for cures?”

“Everything!” He lamented dramatically, “holding my bre—eath, drinki-nlgk! water, doing a headstand, they won't holp go hup'k! away HU'ULP!-ugghhhhh.”

Two light bulbs shattered and Herman dramatically covered her eyes, “careful with those, man!”

“He can't control it, Herm,” Artemia glared at Herman before turning to Ollie and holding both of his shoulders, “and you need to relax. They seem to be reacting to your emotional state. Try taking some deep breaths with me, okay?”

Ollie nodded, “ok-kmp-kay.”

Artemia guided Ollie through some deep breaths. Though his breaths were constantly interrupted by his hiccups, he could tell that they had started getting softer, fading away until…

“...aaaaahhh,” he exhaled softly and smiled at the lack of spasms. “Oh my stars…that actually worked?”

“Yep, I think it was based on your nerves,” Artemia theorized. “When you started getting worried about having to go out there with those hiccups, they got worse, so-”

“Yeah, that's great, sis, but I gotta go up and play for my fans,” Ollie strummed his lyre and winked, “thank you for helping me! You're a real life-saver. Smooches, darling!~”

He kissed both of her cheeks before exiting the storage closet.

“That's my word, dawling, and you're not even saying it right!” Herman called after him as he'd left.

“Classic Ollie,” Artemia shook her head before turning to Herman, “ready to head back home?”

“Whenever you are,” Herman winked with a smile.

“Ew, no,” she rolled her eyes before leaving the storage closet, waving at Hyland before leaving the bar.

Herman blew him a kiss before quickly following behind Artemia. The two of them found an alleyway, Herman transforming into their casual form before carrying Artemia and hurrying back to The Barking Bean.

Fin~

[lurafita]

Magnus' accidental magical inventions

If you think about it, there are many inventions that were made accidentally. The microwave and post-its notes, just to name two. So if this happens to mundanes, why not also warlocks?

Now I'm thinking about Magnus accidentally making all these useful inventions, but he is still kinda pissed about it, because the things he wanted to do when accidentally making this other stuff are still not accomplished.

Izzy: "Okay, but where are we getting greek fire from?" Magnus, sighing and grumbling irritably,: "Here." magics flame into his hand Alec: "There are spells for that?" Magnus: "No. Madzie and me were watching Hercules, and she wanted to try to make a Pegasus out of clouds, like Zeus did. And who am I to stop young, inquisitive minds? Unfortunately it didn't go as planned, and instead of a mini flying horse, we burned down Catarina's kitchen with what turned out to be legitimate greek fire."

[sorcererest-sorcerer]

🌑🌗🌕✨SALUTATIONS✨🌕🌓🌑

❗️THIS IS URGENT❗️

@d1nosaurpower / @wizards-lich / @i-am-a-wizard-i-swear / @witchy-stars

ATTENTION to all wizards or entities who may have received a magic marble from my Bag of Magic Marbles!!!

Something has gone terribly wrong and you must return the marbles post haste! I would retrieve them myself, except I have become… rather embarrassingly trapped within the Bag itself.

If you have a magic marble in your possession, please make your way to the Dream Realms and locate my Château Magique. I (and the Bag) reside there.

[bookish-bogwitch]

Thursday’s the new Wednesday, right?

Thank you to everyone who tagged me yesterday and Sunday. I love seeing what you are cooking up. I’ve been trying to share too but am apparently shadowbanned so you’re not getting notifications of mentions. 

Here’s the last tiny!Baz snippet before the Sweethearts fics post. For context, Baz is six inches tall and has been hiding out in the tower room. Simon takes him out for air under cover of darkness. 

“What’s that one?” Simon asks. He’s leaning back on one hand, pointing the other at the sky. It’s easy, lying in his lap, to sight down the length of his arm. 

“Cassiopeia. A queen.”

“She looks like a W.” 

“She does.” A month ago I’d have mocked him, but he’s right. She’s a fucking W.

We relapse into silence. I’m so comfortable. 

Snow’s been asking about constellations all night, and I’ve been telling him. For someone who dropped Astrology the first chance he got, Snow’s surprisingly interested in the night sky.

Snow insisted I lie on him for warmth. And that I bundle in a woolly mitten. It’s connected by a string to its mate, which dangles over Snow’s shoulder. “Ebb gave me these when I was a kid,” he told me.

Not long ago, I’d have thrown some barb about the goatherd. “How thoughtful of her,” I said tonight.

And because notifications didn’t work on Sunday and because I am a shameless self-promoter, here is a ficlet starring a pining, drunk teen Baz from Lady Ruth’s POV: Snowvians Unite (500, T). 

Tagging everyone I can think of as a desperate shout into the void: @stillmadaboutpetra​, @prettylightsbigcity​, @im-gettingby​, @moodandmist​, @johnwgrey​, @ileadacharmedlife​, @martsonmars​, @mostlymaudlin​, @captain-aralias​, @fatalfangirl​, @takitalks, @forabeatofadrum, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @otherworldsivelivedin, @urban-sith, @facewithoutheart​, @theotherhufflepuff​, @palimpsessed​, @cutestkilla​, @stardustasincocaine​, @sillyunicorn​, @tea-brigade​, @confused-bi-queer​, @whatevertheweather​, @ivelovedhimthroughworse​, @jbrrring​, @twinkle-twinkle-up-above​