#majesia

[lystsyn-blog]

@majesia ( continued from x. )

she hates the tone that conveys with it with the underlying message of ‘as you wish’ -- after all she’s done to bend that guilt to her own purposes, she doesn’t want to be reminded of it. katalina carries the past on her shoulders just as creaking supports hold up a ruined castle; sooner or later, the foundation will turn to dust from the strain.

none of those criticisms make their way onto her tongue. instead, a small smile plays on her lips as she murmurs,

“ i find that to be perfectly acceptable. ”

as katalina takes a seat once more, vira languidly rises from the mattress to drape her arms about her shoulders, and buries her face in the volume of her hair. a slow inhale brings with it that familiar scent --

-- and memories she tries desperately to suppress.

so she begins to speak, to bring herself back to the present.

“ you dedicate your very being to this crew. it’s very... ”

a pause, as she considers her tone, her words.

“ ...selfless. you have always put others before yourself. ”

it’s not a compliment, certainly, but the disdain she feels doesn’t quite bleed into her voice; instead, what little does escape comes through as a quiet sort of concern.

( of course, she knows that quality better than anyone. )

“ you should rest more. i worry for your health. i’m certain they do, as well. ”

[etrefurieuse]

          ❝ Say what you want,    but you do know that I don’t deserve a new beginning. ❞      @majesia / starter call

[toestalucia]

@majesia (s.c.)

           “ Oh, Katalina ! Do you have a minute ? Regarding Auguste, I was thinking—— “ words and feet come to a stop alike once he’s chased her down, gaze shifting to the box of vegetables instead. “ What’s— Did we buy those ? “

[lystsyn-blog]

the silence is...

...uncomfortable.

rather, it is certainly accompanied by comfortable company, but the quiet -- only broken by the thrumming of the ship’s engines, or the wind that sweeps across the main deck, cold in the evening -- seems to expand with each passing moment. it becomes a perturbing pressure that makes vira bite her tongue; neither of them seem to have anything to say, alone. 

not even after all that’s happened.

her lips part, then close once again. what is there to say? i’m sorry for -- well, there’s enough that she’s sorry for to fill a contract, she thinks. sorry probably isn’t enough, regardless. mistakes upon mistakes, and she only finds herself making more. 

she called her out here for a talk -- they’re dating now, right? formally? that’s established, right? -- and still can’t speak worth anything. so yet another is added to her rapidly expanding list.

vira’s sigh is beleaguered, exhausted.

her eyes fall on the sunset. the clouds over the sky are tinged orange-red -- and somehow, from here, it’s more breathtaking than ever seeing it from the ground.

“ were you able to see the sunset? in the capital. ”

the words come out clipped, halting. as soon as she says it, of course, she realizes it’s a mistake -- it’s a breach of a long-unspoken rule between the two of them, to not talk about the past. there’s just too much to reliably unpack; let it stay there, let it stay gone. the present is fine, for now, and the rest can be lost to time.

but it’s not as if she can take it back. the words hang there, unanswered, until she prompts, more gently,

“ ...katalina? ”

@majesia

[etrefurieuse]

          ❝ Caring about someone you barely know.. Aren’t you a bit foolish--? ❞

[toestalucia]

💔 💝 🤐 [ if you haven't gotten them yet ! ]

relationship meme

💔Do they have a certain type of person they will not enter into a relationship with?

if you’ve been a threat to lyria & vyrn & the crew in general that already makes it really hard for gran to trust someone, and even if gran understands the circumstances they will still be unable to forgive the person (despite how bad Gran feels about it themself). so these people are often people that gran don’t trust around lyria & vyrn, and thus won’t date regardless of how they feel about the person. other than that there’s not many qualities that gran would disregard (lyria is rather accepting, and if she accepts someone gran is quick to follow often). that said, they wouldn’t date people in their crew either simply because gran is their captain first and foremost (which also tends to make it harder for gran to be honest about their feelings with the crew, because gran is the captain before they’re friends).

with all this in mind, gran knows they can’t date people who doesn’t want to travel. gran grew up always waiting for their dad to return, they wouldn’t want that on anyone else.

💝How long until they feel secure and comfortable in a relationship?

if it’s at the point of dating gran is already very secure in the relationship tbh! ofc it will take a while more for them to not feel bad for everything the other has to let go of so gran can keep traveling with them, but if gran is willing to date someone it means gran is also able to be truthful with them about what they feel. because gran doesn’t talk about their feelings a lot and keeps a lot inside (despite the fact that they are VERY transparent and most ppl can see whats going on anyway LMAO). but it does take a lot for gran to willingly open up, so the people they’re seriously involved with are people they already trust from the bottom of their heart.

🤐Would they ever confess their feelings first?

while gran wouldn’t mind confessing first it’s not something they would do, simply because they don’t believe they can have a relationship due to all the traveling. so for gran to actually confess first would take a lot. because they’d almost prefer pining no matter if it’s requited or not, because they don’t want someone to give up so much for them.

[battlegowned]

“Just take my hand. It’ll be better, I promise.” kat.

platonic requests for affection ( not accepting! )

        being a crew settled in the vast, chilling skies makes every day an adventure. though, that means unpredictable weather changes as well. even with the grandest helmsman at the wheel, and the primal of airship-building by his side, there are some situations that are just inescapable. as raging tempests and roaring thunderclaps polluted the darkening, daunting sky, crewmates braced for the worst to happen. for a moment, the world seems like it is crumbling away right beneath her feet. an in an instant, everything before her fades darker than the sky she’s witnessing, instilling the most fear she’s ever held.

         awakening in a grassy field, a mixture of confusion, pain, and horror overwhelm the poor girl. she lay on her side, arms crossed and clutched over her chest. it pains to move, almost unbearably---but she manages to roll onto her back and sit herself up. wincing and squeaking with every little inch, it does not take her long to realize the weight of the situation. 

        she is alone. 

        she sits there for what feels like hours, though only seconds pass into minutes. tears begin to puddle in the corners of her eyes. she may be a fantastic captain, but she is still just a child. this is one of her biggest fears come to life---being left alone, hurt, powerless with nothing to save her. at least, that’s what she thinks. 

        in a sudden outburst, djeeta hears her name. at first, it feels like a hallucination. but as the voice nears her location, it feels like there is a small bit of hope forming in her damaged chest. with the sight of her fearless knight approaching to her rescue, the biggest smile chases her despair away. and as soon as katalina arrives, she offers a hand. 

                         “Just take my hand. It’ll be better, I promise.”

        and with that, she really does begin to cry. 

        ❝ K-Katalina... I thought I was alone...! But you’re here... ❞ those were the only words she can speak until the other uses her hand to lift her up. in an instant, djeeta throws herself into the most sincere, relieved embrace she’s ever given.

[lystsyn-blog]

39. — heartache

it did not help that once katalina left albion, vira was assaulted with a feeling she had never experienced before.

having not possessed any significant attachment to her father, or to her brothers, or even to her former home – a mansion, rising above the rest of the town she grew up in, a representation of her family’s influence – when she left for the academy, there was nothing to miss. 

there was no bright light in her cramped life that she could safely say she yearned for; her escape was nothing more than a child running away from their parents’ control. but as the months marched onwards, no regret for her actions ever crept into her mind. at least here she did not live under the yoke of the expectations of a noble daughter; she could train and fight to her heart’s content. it was not satisfactory, but it was an improvement – and maybe, just maybe, she could live with it.

so why was life so cruel?

fate’s hand could have let her languish in yet another gray landscape where she was nothing more than a figurehead, an ideal, a goal for others to reach – instead, it gifted her a person that was so significant as to blot out the very sun.

and she did, when she met her! her own knight in shining armor, to offer her a hand after slaying the monster bearing down on her ( and for once in her life, for the only time, vira felt like a princess from the stories she pored over when she was young. )

katalina – her silhouette, her voice, her swordsmanship, the way she looked at her as an equal, and nothing less – it became her fixation. to be offered affection readily and unconditionally was something vira was a stranger to, and quickly she found herself wanting more. her affection was perhaps not for katalina, but what she symbolized; the first person to ever support her out of nothing more than kindness.

and it was intoxicating.

so much so that she was so ready to sacrifice her own freedom for her love – because it was love, and that was all it could be – that, voluntarily, vira bound herself to albion. a golden prison, built to house its lord and her primal.

it was her choice, and yet she could feel nothing but empty.

having had a taste of what it was to be challenged, to be presented with a person who not only matched her, but was her better in so many fields, she was made once again to be trapped in a world of mediocrity. her fortune was as poetic as it was horrific.

each sunrise her thoughts turn to the capital, and as lord she pays more attention to imperial correspondence than ever before,

but there is never word, never from who she wishes to hear from. eventually her eager waiting melts into quiet, grim acceptance.

@majesia