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Me, telling a group about their mission on the planet: Okay. Rule number 1, do not go off on your own. Rule number 2, if you do go off on your own, do not go in the woods. Rule number 3, if you do go into the woods, never, ever, EVER try to fight any creature in the woods, or you will die. Me: Me: Where’s Major Inez?
Captain Phasma: Breaking rules 1, 2 and 3.
Major, to minimalize the chance of you ending over my head, falling from the ceiling like a predatory bird, I invite you for a drink. Not only because the sight of you falling on me is rather disgraceful and gives bad ideas to younger troopers, but also, seemingly, you need it.
@ask-major-inez
Mitaka: Soooooo, what's the plan?
Inez: I don't know, Hux is smart and Locust is violent. I'm sure they'll figure it out.
Me: If I died, what would you do?
Inez: Probably cry a lot
Phasma: Try to move forward as quickly as I can
Hux: Make sure to hunt down the person who killed you-
Inez: That doesn’t sound that bad-
Hux: And kill them for taking away the pleasure of killing you
Inez: Oh
Me: I was expecting that
Inez, threatening the others with a paintball gun: Listen... Life comes at us fast. We don't know what life is gonna give us... And today, it's gonna give you... a paintball!
Me, hiding behind my desk I flipped: Just let me work!
Inez: So, what, now I’m just supposed to do anything that Phasma does? I mean, what if they jumped off a cliff? Me: If Phasma were to jump off a cliff, they would’ve done their due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes. If you see Phasma jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff. Inez: You jump off a cliff! Locust: Gladly. Provided Phasma did first
Me: Captain! Have you seen the thing?!
Captain Phasma: What thing?
Me: Running around* You know! The thing! I seemed to have misplaced it and it's of great importance!
Inez, walking into the room: There you are Admiral!
Me: Oh,there it is!
Captain Phasma: ...you lost Major Inez?
Major Inez: Make no mistake. Not only am I party rocking, but I am also in the house tonight
Me: But are you shuffling?
Major Inez: Everyday
Hux: What language are you two speaking?
