“To avoid attachments for fear of loss is to avoid life.” Part One II Severus & Lily
After being cast off by Lily, Severus wrote her fourteen letters. When she stopped writing back, he wasted no time before appearing on her doorstep in Coketown.
Lily lived in a half-house with her parents and sister Petunia, far enough away from the slum to be quiet and reflective. It even had a garden outfitted with a table and some chairs where the neighbors gathered with their dogs. It was too late in the evening for it to be occupied and Severus was all alone in Pod End as everyone was inside watching television programs or listening to the radio. He knew Lily was at home because the yellow curtains to her bedroom were closed. She liked to keep them open unless she didn't want to be spied on.
After hesitating (he usually walked right on in), Severus knocked on the door. He waited several minutes before the door opened enough to reveal Petunia Evans, Lily's older sister. Her neck was longer, he noticed, and her lipstick two shades brighter, however, Petunia's voice was just as dour and unpleasant.
"She doesn't want to see you."
Severus looked at Petunia vacantly. "She could tell me this herself."
"Well, she doesn't want to," Petunia said. "Don't send her anymore owls, either."
He almost felt like pleading with Petunia, as if that would somehow change Lily's mind but he knew he'd just look pathetic. "Alright," he said lowly, staring at the paved steps as Petunia slammed the door shut and turned the lock for extra measure.
Taking his time, he made his way back to Spinner's End through the play park. He sat down in their usual haunt by the river, his thoughts racing without any kind of resolution. All he knew was that he couldn't keep bothering her. He couldn't keep begging for her forgiveness. Lily would have to decide that she forgave him. She would have to approach him.
All he could do was wait. There was a possibility that she would miss him and against her better judgement start talking to him again. But Severus really didn't know.
