#maraudersheadcannons

[avada-kedammit]

marauders at some point

Sirius: * is staring at Remus with puppy eyes *

James: Why don’t you just tell him you love him

Sirius: What, nOOOO. I wouldn’t know where to start.

Peter: Well you can start with Hello

Sirius: wHAT, nOOOO, it’ll probably come out as “Hey, I wanna see you with your shirt off”

Peter: . . .

James: well...it’s a start??

[fuckkerydicckery]

*Marauders in transfiguration, fourth-year*

*Remus spills ink all over the table*

Remus (under his breath): holy mother of fucking god

*Marauders turn their head towards Remus with a shocked looked on their face*

*Remus shrugs with a smug smile on his face cleaning up his mess*

Sirius: Holy shit Remus, didn’t know you-

McGonagall: Language Mr.Black! Ten points of Gryffindor

Sirius:  But Remus just spilled and sai-

McGonagall: I dont understand Mr.Black, Remus is doing his essay

*Sirius turns to Remus, the mess is gone and he is doing his essay quietly*

Sirius: I swear professor, he said-

McGonagall: I don't care what he “said” because this whole time he had been doing his essay. So if you may sit down Mr.Black before I give you another detention

*Sirius goes back to his desk*

*Remus looks at Sirius with a goofy smile*

*Sirius gives Remus the middle finger*

McGonagall: Sirius Black! 

[fuckkerydicckery]

Ronks (remus and tonks)

Both Remus and Tonks were hiding in a field of corn. They were spying on a death eater to see if he did anything suspicious that would help The Order in any way shape or form. Nothing so far happened that was worth mentioning to The Order. No one had left the house or even enter the house in the hours they had been spying.This death eater wasn’t very close to the Dark Lord, but Dumbledore insisted that the two would spy on him just in case Voldemort did pay a visit or any other death eater that was high in ranks.

It was a mildly warm night, Remus was thankful for that. It would have been horrid if it was freezing cold and they had to spy for hours and hours freezing. There was a small breeze but it was more than warm. It was already nightfall, Remus guessed it was around eleven or midnight.Deep down Remus was scared that someone would notice them spying, but they were hidden deep in the cornfield. So no one could even see them unless they physically tried to find them.Remus was using omnioculars so he could view the death eater, the omnioculars gave him just a close image it seemed like he was right beside the house itself. Every so often he would give than to Tonks so she could observe, then she would give them back to him. So far the two had very little conversation, they both were concentration on the house. For the past year Tonks and Remus developed a close friendship, they had been already on a few missions before so they both knew each other very well. But Remus was in love with Tonks, every time Dumbledore assigned them together his heart would ring out in joy. He loved spending every second with Tonks. Even in silence, he felt so comfortable, so calm around her. At this point in their friendship they told each other everything, Remus knew everything about Tonks and vise versa.

All Remus could hear was Tonks breathing, it was slow and steady. He knew she was concentrating, ready for anything. Him and Tonks mostly always talked, they were never quite. The odd time they were paired together would be a good day for both of them. They would catch up on their missions and just laugh the whole time. The last time they were paired together would have been two or three weeks ago on a one night mission. There wasn’t that much to catch up on, the biggest thing that happened to Remus was a full moon. But he didn’t know if anything big happened to Tonks. Some days he worried she would tell him she was in a relationship, or he would learn she fell in love with a young wizard. Remus always feared for that day, he loved Tonks. But he could never admit to that love. Tonks deserved better… Better than him.

“Once again, we are sent on another mission on where we do nothing.” Tonks quietly whispered. It was true, it seemed whenever they were paired together nothing eventful happened that was worth mentioning to the order.

“That is true, but it’s always fun. You and I do make a good team.” Remus replied Tonks gave him a smile then looked back at the Death Eaters house.

“Nothing at all is happening, I sometimes wonder Dumbledore's sanity. He sends us on the most boring missions.” Tonks complained, still looking at the death eaters house. Tonks did have a point, but he loved having missions where they didn’t do anything but talk. He loved spending every second with Tonks. They stayed silent for another ten minutes. Remus couldn’t help but stare at Tonks. He always found himself stare at Tonks when she wasn’t looking at him. She was just too beautiful.

“How have your past few weeks been?” Remus questioned Tonks.

“Not much has happened, just normal auror stuff. They mostly have me do assignments no one else wants to do. But it’s better than nothing.”  Tonks replied, but immediately her face went red in embarrassment from the last sentence she said, “I didn’t mean it like that or anything I was just saying-”

“You don’t need to explain I get what you meant.” Remus pushed off, he knew she worked herself wrong and he couldn’t take offense. Remus was a grown man, without a job, or a life for that matter. He felt a pit of sadness, he wished he was more than what he really was. He felt like an embarrassment, Tonks would have a successful life. She was already more successful than Remus, which pained him deeply.

“So how were your past few weeks?” Tonks said, trying to change the conversation

“Uneventful, the most I had was a full moon and that isn’t very exciting,” replied Remus.  Tonks replied to his comment then continued to spy. He could tell she was still embarrassed by what she said so he didn’t try to start another conversation with her. Once again they sat in silence, but this time it was awkward. A feeling Remus could never remember between the two. The awkwardness slowly disappeared but they remained silent for another ten minutes until Tonks started a new conversation.

“You know what I find weird?” Tonks asked, once again looking at Remus. He could tell she was debating even saying those few words by the look on her face.

“What?” Remus replied to her question. Sometimes Tonks asked the stupidest questions that were so naive, questions that Remus found so obvious. But then Remus remembered Tonks was over twelve years younger than him. She still was practically a child, she barely knew anything nor barely lived.

“How after twelve years,” Tonks started, hesitating, “how Sirius still looks so handsome. Most people who leave Azkaban look like hell and they have been there for a few months. He was there for twelve years, but still, he looks the same. Still the smug handsome Sirius.”

“He always got the girls attention, he was always the handsome one.” Remus bluntly answered her question. Inside he was screaming and raging. He thought Tonks liked him, just how she acted around him. But maybe she was trying to get to know his best friend, Sirius. Lupin was trying to remain calm, hence why his answer was quite short and blunt. He looked over to see Tonks reaction, her face was mad. Her lips were pressed against each other, she was shaking her head in disbelief, and her eyes locked between Remus’s.

“You know perfectly well who I’ve fallen for.” Tonks said angrily, “if you weren't too busy feeling sorry for yourself.” Remus was taken back by her comment, never once did she yell at him like she did. Never did she ever point out his flaws, or anything.

“I-” Remus started but Tonks interrupted.

“You always dwell on yourself Remus, you make yourself less of a person. I know you know I love you and I know you have feelings for me. But your too in doubt of yourself to see on it. I could tell when I pointed out having to do all the dirty work was better than nothing, you were hurt. I understand that it must be terrible. But how can you just leave me hanging, I’m so madly in love with you it hurts. And you just sit here and act like I'm just another one of your friends.  I can’t stand it anymore. I can’t stand you avoiding your feelings for me because you're sorry for yourself. I can’t.”

The whole time Tonks was ranting Remus stared at her, trying to hold back tears. Tonks herself was crying. Remus couldn’t believe what was happening, he didn’t know what to say.

“I can’t.” Remus said, “ I can’t love you because you deserve more.”

“Remus this is what I mean you're stuck in this world were your not good enough, because you are,” Tonks told Remus, tears still flowing down her face.

“No I am not,” Remus started to explain his voice starting to crack, “you need someone younger, someone, who has a job, someone who can provide. You don’t need someone years older, you don’t need someone who is really a monster.” At this point Remus was looking away from Tonks, he could feel some tears flowing down his face but he quickly wiped them. As he was wiping them away he heard her scoff.

“That doesn’t matter to me Remus, I don’t care!” She pleaded Remus turned around to her and looked her straight in the eye.

“To me it does, I don’t want you to love me then realize you made a mistake. I’m not worth loving. I could never put you through me, Tonks.” Remus cried. Tonks was shaking her head, her clothes were starting to become damp from all the tears.

“Remus, you need to start understanding you a human too, not just-” Tonks bawled, she couldn’t even finish the sentence from all her tears.

“You don’t understand, I am not a human. I’m a monster. I’m not worth loving.”

“Yes, you are Remus, to me you are!” Tonks quietly said over her tears. Remus just stared at her, he didn’t know what to say at this point. He could do what Tonks wanted and truly love her back. Remus knew he couldn’t love her how she deserved too. He wanted it so bad, she wanted it so bad but he couldn’t. Everything he wanted he would never be able to have. So he just looked at Tonks, her face was so helpless. Tonks was looking down at the ground, he knew she was still crying but her sobs became quite.She looked so lost and alone, she needed Remus and Remus needed her. But he needed to make a decision, a hard decision.

“No,” Remus whispered. Tonks immediately looked up at him, tears still flowing down her cheeks.

“No what?” Tonks said.

“No, it will never work. I won’t argue with you, because I will never change my mind.” Remus confirmed to Tonks.

Remus looked at Tonks to see how she would react. He was afraid she would scream, or yell, or cry.But, her face immediately lost all emotion, tears stopped flowing down her red rosy cheeks, Tonks' mouth was straight no frown or anything. She took a long deep breath and looked up into the sky then back at Remus. He saw her hair turn a mousy brown colour with a bit of waves. Just for a few seconds, he saw her with her new hair, then he heard a loud crack and then she was gone. Quickly Remus apparated because he knew tonks just blew their cover. He was back at his shabby apartment, alone. He collapsed to the floor and started to cry.  Like everything in his life, he just lost Tonks. The one person he ever loved romantically he lost because he was scared.  Scared of failing her, he wished he could take back what he said and love Tonks. But he couldn’t. Remus knew he was too old, too poor, and would never be good enough for the young whimsical auror he fell in love with.

[fuckkerydicckery]

Sirius and Lily

Quitely Sirius Black walked down the stairs into the Gryffindor common room, it was three in the morning but Sirius couldn't fall asleep. He tried to just lay in bed and hope he would but his mind was racing with thoughts he couldn’t escape. Mostly about his family, at this point, he stopped talking to them. His brother- Regulus- wouldn’t even look him in the eye. Sirius thought his brother would at least talk to him, or acknowledge him. Before Reg was sorted into Slytherin, before Sirius was sorted into Gryffindor, before anything- they got along. Over the past few years, Sirius slowly distanced himself from the Black family, until he fully moved into the Potter's house. He knew that his parents told Regulus to ignore Sirius, to disown his brother. Sirius told his friends he was okay with it, but deep down he wished his brother would at least talk to him or acknowledge him.

Sirius stood on the bottom step to look over the common room.It was pitch black except for the fact a small fire was burning in the fireplace. The common room seemed much bigger when no one was in it, he had it all to himself. He was debating sitting on the couch or the chair when he heard a quiet sniffle. Sirius quickly looked behind him and all around the room to see if someone was visible or watching him, but he seemed all alone. He took a step closer to the chair when he heard another sniffle, once again he looked around to find himself alone. Sirius took another step but this time he stepped on a creaky floorboard causing it to make a creaking noise. He saw a head pop up from the couch, but he couldn’t see the face because of how dark it was.

“Hello?” The head said to Sirius, he could tell it was a girls voice. He recognized the voice but he couldn’t pinpoint it. Sirius continued to walk toward the couch, replying to the girl.

“Sorry for bugging you, I just couldn’t sleep.” Sirius got close enough to recognize the girl- Lily Evans.

“It’s fine,” Lily replied eyeing Sirius as he sat down on the chair. She was wrapped in a few blankets, gripping a letter. Sirius saw that she had tear stains on her cheeks but decided to not mention it. Lily Evans kept looking at him, he could tell she was trying to string a few words together to start a conversation but she didn’t say a word. Sirius was twirling his long hair from his fingers, he was thinking it was a mistake going down to the common room. Sirius was debating going back to his dormitory, but somehow he felt comfort with Lily being with him- even though there was an awkward feeling in the air. After a few minutes, Lily stopped starting at Sirius and looked at her letter. Sirius could tell she was taking in each word, he could see tears forming in her eyes, and every once in awhile she would put down the letter and take a slow deep breath trying to calm down. Sirius wanted to know what was in the letter causing Lily to get so upset. The letter itself was around two pages but Lily kept reading it over and over again, he wondered what was going through her mind.

Sirius started to hum a song he didn’t know what song he was humming to but he continued to hum. Quite frankly Sirius was bored out of his mind. Evans wasn’t talking to him and there was nothing else he could do. Soon Sirius noticed he was tapping out the rhythm of the song with his hands and his humming got gradually louder.

“Do you mind?” Evans snapped at him, Sirius looked her dead in the eye and continued to hum and tap his hand this time louder than before she talked to him. He heard Lily groan and slam her letter onto the table.

“You realize your not the only person in the room Sirius?” Lily quietly yelled at him, something about her getting mad made Sirius stop.

“I do, but I’m just trying to distract myself from my pending thoughts about my terrible life.” He told Lily. He saw her shake her head in disbelief.

“How terrible can your life be? You come from a noble family, one of the best wizard-”

“Let me stop you right there Evans,” Sirius interrupted Lily, “you know how terrible my family is. How they agree with the Dark Lord, how they think they are superior above everyone. So why are you saying that my life is perfect?” Sirius was sick and tired of everyone thinking he had it easy. He saw Lily mouth sorry then pick up her letter.

“I don't have many friends and within the span of a year, I have lost my two best friends. Severus, and my sister, Petunia.” Lily started to explain to Sirius, she didn’t know why she was telling him. But she needed to tell someone how she felt.

“Ever since I got into Hogwarts, Petunia has grown to hate me. I think because I left her because now I'm our parent's favorite daughter. They have forgotten about her, which is reasonable. Not every day you learn that your daughter is a witch. For the past six years she’s been so distant, whenever I went home she would ignore me. But recently she's become worse, when I recently went home she kept calling me names like ‘freak’ and ‘misfit’. I ignored her at first, but slowly it's been catching up with me. And it hurts a lot, your sibling hating you.” Lily explained, her voice started to crack when she finished. Tears started to flow down her face, she quickly wiped her face with one of her blankets. But she continued to cry, soon she was bawling. Lily tried to speak but her voice was cracked and her sobs replaced her words.

Sirius felt for Lily, he knew exactly how she felt. He knew how much it hurt when a sibling ignored you.

“I guess I feel the same,” Siris began, “ ever since I moved in with James my brother has ignored me. He won't even look at me. I get that we have our differences, we are different people. We both have changed over the last few years, out relationship was affected when I was sorted into Gryffindor and once again when he was sorted into Slytherin. He became the golden child and I became the embarrassment. I thought we could continue our relationship, or at least try to rebuild it or something along those lines. But we can’t, Reg will always be my parent's puppets. He does whatever my parents ask him. My guess is they told him to ignore me, so he did.” Sirius sighed, he never told anyone about this. Never in his wildest dreams, he would expect him telling his life story to Lily Evans. He noticed that Lily had calmed down as he was telling his story, she was nodding along and he could tell she related to Sirius.

“It’s the worst Sirius, the absolute worse. But I rather have Petunia ignore me then send me this-”

Lily gave the letter to Sirius and told him to read it out loud.

“Lily, you are my sister. You were my sister, but not anymore. Over the years you have clearly chosen what's more important in your life. And you chose that school for people like you. Those people are freaks, like yourself. Mum and Dad clearly think your steller but I can clearly see that this school is nothing more than a scam for nutjobs. You say that you're perfect like that makes you important. It doesn’t Lily, why would it matter if this school doesn't’ teach you anything worth your while. You will never have a career nor a life, and I promise you I will never support you ever. You made your choice choosing the school.  Now you are mum and dads golden child but soon Lily they will see what a waste the school is. What a waste you are. You're not special, you aren’t gifted, you’re nothing Lily. Nothing at all. You're worthless, to me and to the family. Whenever people ask if I have siblings I tell them I don't have one, because you aren’t my sister. You will never ever be my Sister.” Sirius read.

Sirius couldn’t believe what the letter read, he knew it wasn’t true. Lily was the best in their class, she aced every spell she tried, she was amazing at potions, she would have an amazing career in the wizarding world. Sirius sometimes envied Lily on how good she was, she knew nothing about the world of magic anyone who didn’t know Evans was muggle-born would think she came from a noble wizard family. Sirius came from a wizarding family and he wasn’t as half as good as Evans. Lily once again started to cry, Sirius walked to the couch and sat beside her. He guided Lily’s head to his shoulder for her to cry on.

“Lily this isn’t true!” Sirius affirmed he was petting her head crying to calm her down.

“But what if it is!” Lily cried, “what if this is a joke, what if I can't get a job. What if Sirius, what-” Lily looked up to Sirius hopelessly, his hand was still combing through her hair. She could feel how damp his shirt was now from her tears.

“Lily is isn't and you know this! You are the most talented student in the whole school, you are everything we do, you do good on exams. The teachers love you. Lily, you will do amazing in the wizarding world, I promise you.” Sirius assured Lily, she looked at Sirius then nodded her head and whispered: “thank you”. He continued to comb through her hair as her sobs became quieter and quieter until she was no longer crying. They both sat there in silence, Lily on Sirius' shoulder, Sirius combing through her hair. It was calming for the both of them, for once they understood each other. For years they bickered and had a grudge against them, but for this moment the past was forgotten. For hours they sat there in silence, by the time they spoke again the sun was starting to rise.

“Thank you, Sirius,” Evans said to Sirius smiling, “you’re not as bad as I thought.” Sirius laughed at what Lily said.

“I could say the same thing about you.” Sirius joked, Lily started to laugh but her laughter turned into a yawn. Both of them got up and started to walk towards the staircases to their dormitories.

“Goodnight Sirius.”

“As you, Evans.”