Context: @mcity-xe and I made a joke where Vida keeps hens as pets because I sent her a picture of hens in some transparent bag and I made a HC that Vida might keep them as pets 💀
First of all I just wanna say I have no excuse for this except that it was @wordpuddle 's fault, and my own for talking about random hcs after midnight. Please don't take ANYTHING from this fic seriously
Or, an au where Mario becomes a head coach about a year after WC. It changes some things. Most of them just become more chaotic
It started with a red card. Or well, no, that wasn't quite true. It started with Dalić leaving few months ago. And with Mario becoming a head coach.
(Luka was still convinced it was entirely his fault. Or mostly, at the very least. Asshole.)
It was...weird. Not necessarily bad, but definitely weird. The whole dynamic between them shifted significantly and Luka felt out of balance.
Not that that wasn't the case before with Mario. Still, somehow, this was worse.
Either way...maybe it didn't start with Rog getting red card, but it surely didn't get better with it. And Luka thought the other Marko would be more likely to get a red. They spent too much time tigether, it seemed.
That wasn't what made Luka lose his composure thought. No. It was after the game, when they were all in the dressing room. When Mario was supposed to say whatthey did and didn't do well.
"Marko...you played well, until that red card. But if I am being quite honest, it was Ronaldo and I would have probably done the same."
If he was in the movie, Luka was pretty sure someone would put the background noise of glass breaking when they focused on his face.
"What the fuck?!"
Everyone turned to stare at him. Luka could swear half of them were shocked, and the other half just waited to pull out popcorn. It was infuriating.
"You can't just tell him it's okay that he got a red? Are you out of your mind?"
Mario easily met his gaze, not at all worried about his outburst. Was he calmer since he retired? Or did Luka just forget?
"I didn't say it was okay. I said I'd do the same."
Luka closed his eyes. Counted to ten. Then to twenty.
"That's essentially the same thing, in case you didn't know."
Mario sighed. "Fine."
He picked up one of the shoes on the side...wait why were there extra shoes there? What-
Mario threw it at Rog. Or well, he tried to, but instead it ended up hitting Mateo.
"Ouch. What-"
"My bad. That was meant for Marko."
Luka buried his face in his hands.
"Is this hell?" He whispered to himself.
Rog, who was having an awfully fun time, all things considered, leaned a bit to the side, towards Luka.
"Of course not. It's super hell."
Luka looked up, raising his eyebrows. Rog just shrugged, leaning back.
"It's because you are gay."
On another thought...Luka really didn't want to know. Pjaca, despite being on the other side of the dressing room, and leaned on the wall, leaned forward, towards Rog.
"I see you are a man of culture as well."
Before Rog could answer, Ante kicked Pjaca in the leg that supported his weight, and Pjaca fell on the floor.
"At least spare the rest of us your flirting skills. If I hear about Destiel one more time from you two, I will change your Netflix password."
Pjaca groaned from the floor. Mario picked up another shoes and threw it in Ante's general direction. He missed again, and it would have hit Livi in the face, if he didn't catch it at last moment. He shot Mario a glare.
"I would appriciate if no one breaks my nose with a shoe. I don't think you'd survive another game without me."
Domo picked up the shoe that hit Mateo and threw it at Dejan, who was on his phone. It made his phone clatter to the floor. The glare he shot Domo could kill a man.
"Well," Domo said, "I suppose we should be glad Mario's coaching skills are better than his throwing ones-"
Domo ducked just in time to avoid not one, but two shoes flying in his direction. The one Dejan threw his way hit him in the shoulder and the one Mario threw...hit Luka instead.
Suddenly, everyone froze. The silence was thick and opressive and Luka's gaze slowly zeroed on Mario.
"Did you just throw a fucking shoe at me?!"
At that, Perišić and Domo shared a look and stood up.
"Now kids, let's leave the parents to talk! Everyone. Get out."
The dressing room quickly cleared, until only Mario and Luka were left there. The rest of the team found themselves outside.
"What was that?" Uremović asked.
"Yeah, are they going to kill each other? They seemed close to killing each other back there," Juarnović added.
Domo and Dejan shared a look and burst out laughing. Dejan ended up leaning on the wall from how hard he was laughing.
Livi sighed.
"They won't kill each other," He said, grimacing.
Domo and Dejan laughed even harder.
"The worst thing they could do is make out on one of the beches and break it," Dejan managed to say between fits of laughter.
The players that recently joined the team looked very confused. Livi looked at Bruno who looked half uncomfortable, and half like he wanted to laugh as well.
"Do you think it's too early for me to retire?"
Bruno rolled his eyes at him.
"Surprisingly, yes. If you retire we can also retire."
Livi pouted. Laughter slowly died down, and they were all left there in silence again, unsure if they should go to their rooms or not. This wasn't exactly a...usual situation.
Then Domo stepped forward.
"Well, as vice captain I suggest we all get a drink...and try not to imagine what's happening behind those closed doors."
Most people groaned at his wink, with few scandalized "Domo!" yells as well. In the end they all did go and get a drink.
Some things they were just better off...not knowing.
"So, do you usually watch Supernatural?" Pjaca asked Rog and few meter away, Ante groaned.
