#marlin bae

[swynlake-spill]

So as Lady Fipplehorn, which dream couples are you rooting for IRL? And which ones should definitely ONLY be in our dreams??

oh u mean rate them all and pass ultimate judgement? absolutely! 

Duke Tod Sionnach & Baroness Melody Oceana: 6/10 

HONESTLY... 

i think they’re both too shy iRL?? ive never seen two introverts work what would they even talk about where is the passion 

might work best as friends  

i do desperately want to believe im wrong 

ok i have a grudge bc melody should be with tiana irl... 

But maybe. Just Maybe.

Her Royal Highness, Ashley Armbruster & Countess Ashleigh Quinlan: 8/10

overall very predictable 

if i say anything too mean though i’ll be kidnapped and duct taped to the front of a moving car headed straight into the atlantic

best remains in dreams bc if they dated IRL then we might as well rename the town Ashley-Lake 

truly the stuff of both nightmares and viral reality tv shows. i shudder at the power

 Baroness Gliss Wintergrove & Miss Tiegan Khan: 7/10 

didn’t see this one coming but never met gliss in my life!! she keeps to the hollow so far huh 

um two hot ladies though what is there to complain about???

Gliss seems too sweet and down to earth IRL for Tigg to woo her but I love crazy people with introverted people its the spice of my life 

would like to see on a date at hatter’s even if it isnt otp  

Lady Holley Shiftwell & Marquess Mu-yeol Bae: 7/10 

this one is wIIIIIILD 

imagining the awkward vibes in real life i think they are strong enough to topple buildings 

would not trust holley with a teenage child personally (for HER own safety to be clear)

ok i admit it........im so curious

why not

MAKE IT HAPPEN 

Lieutenant Tiana Truitt & Viscountess Amity Blight: 2/10 

absolutely not

amity is not technically too young but she does not have her shit together enough to be the strong, supportive, sweet, responsible, rich partner that Tiana deserves (she deserves melody. yeah i know she was a gossipy ho that makes me like her MORE) 

thank u next 

Viscount Iandore Lightfoot & Viscount Riku Nakayama: 11/10

YES

OTP 

CLEARLY MEANT TO BE FOREVER

HAVE ALREADY BOUGHT MY GIFT FOR THE WEDDING 

Lady Tallulah Robinson & Rev. Al McWiggin: 8/10 

contrary to tallulah’s opinion probably, she does not actually deserve him

that being said i think they would actually work together p well 

they have “opposites attract” energies. 

as a bonus, i think tallulah would look really hot in cosplay 

Captain Thomas Harrington III & Lady Arista Triton: 5/10

middle of the road couple for me 

probably bc im sure if u swapped arista for another blond ol’ tommy probably wouldn’t even notice

ultimately think Arista settled 

i dont hate this tho and tommy WOULD BE SO LUCKY to date arista.

 So! Here’s some advice, Harrington: Arista is your ticket to reputation redemption. 

[swynlake-spill]

In light of recent events who is your go to team for swynlake disasters?

obsessed with this question. this should be mandated. if you don’t have your team-up for the apocalypse, what are you even doing? We recommend a team of at least six. 

My personal Swynlake Avengers, as per the performances over the weekend: 

Louie Mallard: Gutsy AF, he dodged potholes and pigheads on his moped like a super version of a delivery boy who was SERIOUSLY working for those tips! Rescue to you in 30 min or less, or your money back guaranteed! 

Barbie Roberts: We all know she had pizzazz, but turns out this girl has PUNCH! Barbara, I’m SWOONING, do they teach you those moves in Zumba? We’re talking Black Widow realness without any of the emo Russian backstory. Thanks for saving Ashlé and more! 

Marlin Bae: Every team’s got to have a sexy medic and look no further than Marlin, who was seen leading a few other healing-talents through the rubble! Lots more ppl would have hit up the general hospital without our very own Magic McDreamy! You’re hired, Mr. Bae! 

Ian Lightfoot: Don’t underestimate him! He kept his cool and was there Emotionally, Physically, and Magically for yet another Ashley (why r all u ashleys a tiny bit helpless smh just saying). If I was nerdier I’d make a DnD reference about him being the cleric or something but I don’t honestly know if that’s even accurate, but turning invisible seems to be highly useful so i WANT IT 

Toulouse Bonfamille: a controversial choice I know, considering the whole WOLFING OUT thing, but nobody was eaten and Peri, it seemed was actually rescued! Who let the dogs out? Me, I did, and I think it would be very cool of me to ride Toulouse Bonfamille into battle one day. Please don’t make this dirtier than it is, I simply love big dogs (why does every sentence make it worse)

Tiana Truitt: Tiana is obviously the Nick Fury of the group. Level-headed and practical, she was working with me to spread info and to help ppl get the help they needed! Where would the heroes of Swynlake be without the Tianas of the world, there to keep supplies runnin’ and to pack a killer lunchbox? 

and there you have it! Who would you team up with? 

[swynlake-spill]

Why does everyone thirst for Nemo’s dad isn’t he like...a prick

as if a good attitude is a requirement for being all sorts of sexy. plz that attitude is so 1850s! hot people are actually terrible most of the time. Case in point: the Ashleys. Beautiful, terrifying, have probably committed several war crimes. 

so don’t complain to me-- complain to society for prizing physical attraction over moral character! 

[swynlake-spill]

Wait I wanna know the other top contenders for tings baby daddy

i thought i already answered this tbh but to recap

Wolf Amadeus, who keeps lurking around her street in a very suspicious manner

Tom Harrington, due to proximity

Phil Knightley, due to proximity

Mu-yeol Bae??? here me out they used to hang out all the time...what if hatter is just a cover...

Gil: they work together ! workplace romance is hard to resist

John Darling: we can't dismiss the fact that it could STILL be john darling despite him fleeing town under mysterious circumstances. potentially fled BECAUSE he was a baby daddy? for shame.

[swynlake-spill]

I'm glad Hatter put to rest months of rumors by just kissing his boyfriend in front of god and the whole town just trying to have their morning coffee. We have our confirmation but my eyes need bleach

ok hater

me personally i love to see two queer men celebrate their love in public!!! congrats to hatter and marlin <3

[swynlake-spill]

The regency dream gave us our queer old man role models but I don’t see definitive proof irl I really need Nemo to confirm or deny is your father and Hatter canon or what??? I’m in shambles

IT'S THE MYSTERY OF THE YEAR.

Tbh im going with: YES. the dream #exposed where ppl's hearts lie, thats what valentine's is all about! so i'm calling this case SOLVED. hatter and mr bae r officially hooking up u heard it here first and not from that weird squirrel they're always hanging around

[swynlake-spill]

hot bartender marlin bae spotted walking into the back office to talk to hatter on new year's morning!? what's that about?

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

now wait a second...its been months of reports of hatter and marlin hanging out BUT IS THIS CONFIRMATION...

plz im desperate for more queer role models MAKE IT SO

[swynlake-spill]

Does Nemo know that his dad and Hatter are constantly flirting in the middle of the coffee shop so embarrassing for him

ARE they flirting or are they just dating.

legitimate question like i've been watching these two middle aged men get refreshments and chat about their lives for months now. and maybe they are INDEED simply friends. i cannot deny that many people get refreshments and chat about their lives.

but idk i feel like they've been dating and they are just sooooo boring about it that its flying under the radar. thats my conspiracy theory of the week!