Christmas doesn't feel like Christmas.
The Holdovers // Angus Tully in college celebrating Christmas without Walleye.
It was December 18th. Snow was falling and all of Boston seemed eager for Christmas to arrive. Happy shoppers left stores with gifts for their loved ones. Carolers sang "White Christmas" while families skated in the park. The last day of classes before break was always bittersweet for Angus. It has been three years since that Christmas at Barton. Angus found himself alone yet again another Christmas. His mother and Stanley decided it was time for another trip. Leaving Angus all alone. The last time he spent Christmas "alone" he really wasn't alone. He had Mary and Walleye. They were more like family than his own family.
It was the best Christmas he had in a very long time. Angus often wondered what Walleye was up to. Mary and Angus still kept in touch. He was thankful for Mary's support getting through his last year and a half at Barton.
After Angus left Barton, he decided to go to Boston College and study history. He made a few good friends but all of them went home for Christmas.
Angus was planning on going to a ski lodge to get away for a few days. If he was going to be by himself, he might as well have some fun.
He was packing up his things when he got the call. "Hello? Who is this?" Angus said. He waited for a response. "Angus, this is Mary Lamb. I wanted to check in on you, dear."
"Oh, it's so good to hear from you! I'm doing alright." "Good, good. What are you up to this Christmas?" "Well, my mom and Stanley are traveling again." Angus tried to hide his disappoint but his tone was cold and melancholic. "Angus, I'm going to my sister's and we would be more than happy to host you for Christmas. What do you say?" Mary's tone was gentle and motherly.
Angus had to think for a minute. "I guess my solo ski trip can wait a few days." Angus got the address and planned on leaving first thing in the morning.
On his way, he decided to pick up a bottle of whiskey as a thank you. Luckily the roads weren't too bad. Some of the snow was turning into slush and the drive was only forty-five minutes.
When Angus arrived, he took out his suitcase and walked up the stairs. The last time he hiked up those stairs Walleye was waiting in the car. It almost felt wrong to be celebrating without him.
Mary answered the door and gave Angus a big hug. "It's so good to see you, dear!"
A wide grin crossed his pale face. "Good to see you, too. Thank you for having me."
Mary laughed. "Well, it's no ski trip but I can promise some good home cooking." She took Angus's suitcase and shut the door. "Come into the living room. There's someone I want you to meet." Angus followed Mary. He looked around at the pictures on the wall. There he was. Curtis Lamb. He recalled meeting him once. Curtis was a good man. He deserved better. To be honest, a lot of people deserved better. A certain history professor deserved better.
"Angus, I want you to meet my nephew, Curtis," Mary said. She smiled proudly as she sat down next to the young boy on the couch. He was playing with a wooden train.
Angus couldn't help but smile. "It's nice to meet you, Curtis." He awkwardly waved at the boy.
Mary picked up Angus's suitcase again. "I'll show you to where you are staying."
Angus enjoyed his time with Mary's family. They were kind people. They all laughed and sang Christmas songs at the piano. Mary cooked up a delicious Christmas feast. It looked like Christmas. The tree was decorated with ornaments and lights. It was snowing outside. He got to experience a real family Christmas. But something felt missing. He couldn't help but wish Walleye was there. Christmas doesn't feel like Christmas without him.
"Angus, I have a gift for you," Mary said. She handed him a carefully wrapped gift with a red bow. "Go on. Open it."
He took off the ribbon and the wrapping paper. It was a book. The title read, "Carthage: The Ancient City of Tunisia by Paul Hunham." He opened up the book and read the first page. It was dedicated to him. Angus Tully. Maybe you don't have to physically be with someone at Christmas to feel their presence.
