#master zho

[aurriearts]

(image described, check ID)

so i couldn't sleep and went back to thinking about my lost suns redraw/rewrite project, hashed out some first passes drafting designs for the trio between taking notes on the plot and dialogue.

also i realized teff'ith is supposed to be 18 in the events of the comic (at least, I think so). the original comic art certainly didn't show that lmao

[sullustangin]

Read comments from bottom to top to get chronological order. 

I’ll add a correction to my comments:  a combination of trauma and self-flagellation and potential Empire activity caused Zho to have a scrambled head.

This is a spin-off of my post on Satele and her choices.  When did Zho know about Theron?  And did he do anything the help the kid in advance of leaving him at Haashimut? 

By the way, if you’ve never read the Lost Suns comic, whatever you do, don’t click this link.  Ahem. (cough cough)

Inquiring minds want to know your headcanon. 

**

My ideas:  Zho was concerned by the time Theron was 9 that the Force wasn’t responding to him.  Maybe he was a late-bloomer -- stay the course, don’t even suggest that there was a problem.  Zho had procrastinated on telling Theron because the boy had to be sensitive -- heir of Revan, son of Satele, grandson of Tarsiele. 

By the time Theron was 13, the War ended and the Empire won.   Zho felt needed elsewhere -- I haven’t decided if there was an actual top secret mission from Jedi Council or he just went off quixotically. (Theron did say he was “never reliable” in Lost Suns -- what gave him that impression by the time he was 13? And yet he wants Master Zho “to be proud” in SWTOR. Such a complicated relationship, so many ways to interpret this.)

Maybe Zho thought the problem was him.  Kid with that sort of lineage had to be sensitive -- he must be the problem, not Theron.  Zho didn’t have the courage to even propose the idea to Theron and talk about either potential.

Alternatively, we also might consider this description from Theron in Annihilation, p. 116 in hardback: “In his few weeks at the [Jedi] academy, he’d experienced enough of the unintentional but unmistakable self-righteous superiority of the Jedi to last a life time.”  I assume he’s referring to Haashimut, right after Zho disappeared.  That experience in close proximity to Zho’s depature might have tinted his retrospective view of Zho and his actions, who wanted to pretend all was well with Theron.

And maybe there’s some element of truth in that. Please note this isn’t an anti-Jedi/Sith remark.  There are some Force users we do encounter in SWTOR that treat Jedi/Sith differently compared to non-Force Users, and there also Force users that are very full of themselves because of their status.  If we choose to interpret Zho as having that same flaw, then Zho might have believed he knew what was best for the boy, Force sensitive or not.  He raised him, he’s his father, how dare anyone else tell him how to raise his child, regardless of the long-term impact on Theron.

The end result is the same with any interpretation: Zho sent Theron to Haashimut.  The child almost didn’t survive the journey and then got the shock of being told by a stranger that he didn’t belong there. 

**

In the words of Teff’ith, “Now we get why Theron’s so messed up.”  There are many questions about Zho and his intent and his justifications -- which he could never provide, and Theron himself recognized that...but that doesn’t mean Theron was at rest with what what he referred to as “childhood trauma” -- which wasn’t caused by Satele or Jace or their absence, necessarily, but by Zho’s departure.  Ngani was the only father Theron had ever known until Jace entered his life at 26...which is far too late for ‘parenting’ to take place. 

Thanks to @previousjane​ for commenting on the original post and inspiring this one.

[keldae]

Soulmate AU prompt: the one where your soulmate’s last words to you are written on your body.

For as long as Theron could remember, the words “Wait for me” had been written across his forearm, invisible to any eyes but his own. When he had childishly asked Master Zho about it after learning to finally read, the old Jedi had told him that the Force had chosen a soulmate for him, and those were the last words of that soulmate that Theron would hear. 

Theron’s next innocent question had been if Master Zho had any words written on him. That got a cough and an incoherent mutter before he was sent to go do more meditation exercises.

By the time he was 15, he was jaded and angry enough to give up on the idea of a soulmate ever really existing. “Wait for me”, pfft. The hell type of last words are those, anyway?

It didn’t stop him from flinching somewhat every time he heard “Wait for me!” being spoken around him, even if it wasn’t directed at him.

He had almost forgotten about the words when Master Taerich walked into his and Darok’s planning room. Truthfully, he still didn’t think about it until after he, Lana, and Jakarro and Dee-Four had made it to Rishi intact and settled into the safehouse. 

As he had stripped down to shower, the words on his arm caught his gaze for the first time in weeks. Wait for me. This time, he swore he heard the pretty Jedi’s voice in his head saying that.

Impossible. She’s a Jedi! They don’t... Jedi don’t have soulmates! Theron stubbornly shook his head and tried to banish that terrifying thought from his mind. His forearm was red from scrubbing by the time he finally finished his shower, the words still displayed tauntingly on his skin.

He paced around the tiny kitchen of his apartment, balefully staring out the window at the Eternal Fleet in orbit around Coruscant. Zakuul had taken everything: his faction’s independence, his planet’s safety, and the woman Theron was only now admitting he had loved. There was no amount of whiskey in the galaxy that could take away that pain.

And yet, the damned words still lingered on his arm. Those hadn’t been Xaja’s final words before leaving Coruscant -- her words had been “I promise”. A promise you broke, he bitterly thought. 

He flopped onto his couch, whiskey still in hand, as he glowered down at the words. They were the wrong words. Or, despite how his heart kept shattering in his chest, Xaja Taerich hadn’t been his destined soulmate. Maybe the entire thing about soulmates was a sham after all, no matter how he had felt when he was with her. 

Or... he felt a sliver of hope cut through his despair. Maybe “I promise” hadn’t been Xaja’s last words to him. Maybe she still had more words to say to him, more than the words engraved into Theron’s skin. Maybe...

Maybe she was still alive.

“Theron, please!”

Oh, it hurt to walk away from her, or to hear that desperate, heartbroken tone in her voice. Theron clenched his jaw and forced himself to not turn around as he strode back through the train car to his escape speeder. If he turned around, he was going to completely blow the op. He didn’t want to see the tears he knew had to be trickling down Xaja’s cheeks or see the fear in her eyes, only half because he knew it would make him run back to her. Lana knows the plan. Lana will get her out safely. You have to keep her alive.

“Theron!” Stars, Theron had never wanted to hear Xaja sound so terrified or betrayed. “Please, wait--”

Panic shot through Theron’s heart. This couldn’t be the moment when he heard Xaja’s last words to him, not like this! He broke into a run as he pulled the detonator out of his pocket and pushed the trigger button. The train rocked violently as he lunged the last few strides for the speeder. Over his shoulder, he just heard Xaja’s cry as she fell, her words cut off mid-sentence. 

Lana will get her out. Lana will take care of her. Theron mounted the speeder and flew away from the doomed train, risking himself for a moment to watch the crash. His heart stayed in his throat until he saw two women -- one with long red hair, one with blonde -- jump from the crashing train. He nodded to himself when he saw them just clear the wreckage, then flew away to where Korin had parked the shuttle. Time for the next stage of the plan.

His existence was pain, the epicentre a fire burning through his chest. Stars, it hurt to breathe. It hurt to do anything, including looking around. Sight was becoming difficult anyway, with how dark everything was getting. 

Red appeared over him, and he wrinkled his nose as he felt loose strands of Xaja’s hair brushing against his skin. She didn’t seem to notice it; Theron could feel her hands cradling his face, hear her hitched breaths. “Don’t leave me, Theron,” she whispered, sounding perhaps even more terrified than she had on the cursed train. “Stay with me, please...” 

Theron tried to give her a smile as he managed to grip her wrist with his hand. She’s here. She’s here. I can hold on. “Alwa--” he started to whisper.

“Don’t say that!” Panic laced itself through Xaja’s suddenly-shrill voice. “Anything but that!” When Theron focused on her blurry face, he could see the tears racing down her too-pale cheeks, the terror in her eyes. “Theron, please, not now, not like this!”

Why wouldn’t... Theron glanced to Xaja’s forearm, suddenly guessing what word had been written on his wife’s skin from birth, then looked back at her eyes. Not now. Need to... say something... something else. “... Love you,” he finally whispered. The strain in his chest was worth it to see the panic lessen in her eyes, even if only slightly.

“I love you too.” Xaja rested her forehead against Theron’s; he could feel her tears falling onto his skin. “Stay with me, love. We’re going to get you home. Just stay with me, please... don’t leave me...”

“Don’t... tell me to wait...” Theron heard himself whisper as he sank into unconsciousness. 

It was time. Over fifty years after Xaja had all but screamed for him to not say that one word while he had fought for his life, he now rested in a hospital bed. Force knew he had spent enough time in these beds over his life. Fitting that he should be in one at the end. 

He just saw the doctor nod at Xaja as his breath became more difficult. It was time. She took a shaky breath, then nodded at the doctor. Theron heard a switch being moved, and knew that the machines prolonging his life had been disengaged. After ninety-odd years, he was ready to go. 

He managed to give Daenril and Lynaen, both standing beside his bed, a weak smile, then looked up at Xaja’s worn face. “See you on the other side,” he whispered to his family, gazing up at the jade green eyes he had fallen in love with so long ago.

Xaja smiled and leaned down to rest her forehead against his own. “Wait for me,” she murmured. And this time, Theron wasn’t terrified of hearing those words coming from her, knowing it would be the last thing he heard her say.

“Always,” he softly answered. He glanced away from Xaja’s wobbly smile in time to see Always appear on her forearm, and knew Wait for me was finally visible on his own skin. 

The last thing he felt was Xaja’s kiss against his lips before peaceful, quiet darkness settled over him. He blinked, then saw Master Zho, smiling as he held out a hand for his last student to take. 

Theron looked down at his own hands, young and strong again like he had de-aged sixty years, then grinned. “Be there in a bit,” he said to Master Zho as he glanced behind him. “I promised her I’d wait.”

Master Zho chuckled and lowered his hand, sitting down and waving for Theron to sit beside him. “May as well get comfortable then, while Orgus and Airna argue over who gets to greet her first.” He smiled as Theron sat beside him and clapped his shoulder. “Well done, Theron. You did good.”

Theron smiled at the praise from his old mentor, and settled in to wait for Xaja. I promised.

[sullustangin]

Headcanon Proposition and a Fic for Father’s Day.

I've seen a lot of discussion about Theron's issues with his mother, but even though it emotionally hurts, he sees the logic in it and can accept it.  It's not easy.  He can also understand and accept Malcom's reactions and decisions.  It's for the Greater Good (Republic, Jedi, the free galaxy as we know it, etc.) .

I don't think we ever see in canon Master Zho ever giving Theron a heads up about anything that happened surrounding his departure, Theron's lack of the Force, or the Treaty of Coruscant  -- not in the Lost Suns comic, anyway.  I'm playing around with the idea that maybe Satele isn't the source of Theron's attachment issues -- rather, it's Zho.  Zho knew Theron better than Satele or Jace did as a child, and then he still decided to leave him at age 13.  It's one thing to make a decision without getting to know the child or never have the option.  It's another to raise a kid for 13 years and leave with no forwarding address. 

So here’s  a Father’s Day Fic that hashes some of that out.  This does fit in my Corellian Whiskey and Sullustan Gin universe, but it’s not required reading, can stand alone, and doesn’t feature the romantic leads.

Fathers and Son -- Rated T mostly for Petty Smuggler revenge.