#match.con

[nainenvuonnanolla]

Match.com-raportti: Too Good to Be True...

Match.com-raportti: Too Good to Be True…

Naisen täydellinen match.com-löytö on paljastunut täydelliseksi huijaukseksi. Maailman ihanin irlantilaismies paljastui kahden viikon uskomattoman vedätyksen päätteeksi maailman taitavimmaksi nigerialaishuijariksi. Naisen epäilykset toki heräsivät jo silloin, kun miehelle tuli äkkilähtö työkomennukselle Etelä-Afrikkaan. Aikaa ei ollut edes viiden minuutin lentokenttätreffeille, mutta selitykset…

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[marcusisfunny]

My new Match.com profile.

Dating online kind of sucks. I used to have 3 minutes on it. Maybe two. I'm on Match.com (again). Today I decided to change my profile...

Ok, I know this is going to sound weird, but I think someone knocked me out and locked me in my/their trunk... For some reason the only app that will load on my phone is the Match one, and for some other reason, the people at Match approved this instead of trying to help... I'm getting kind of hungry. When I'm not busy being locked in a trunk, I work in the IT field for a plasma biological company in Charlotte. I just moved here this month and am looking to meet new people. I consider myself laid back (look at me, not panicking in the back of someone's trunk (possibly my own)). I hope they let me out soon because I have some homework to do (I'm going back to school to get another degree (I have one in English Lit and I would like one in Computers)). I seriously can't believe I'm in here! I mean seriously. Some of it's coming back to me; there was a chase and somehow I got caught (I thought I would get away since I run 3-4 times a week and love obstacle courses / mud runs). It'd be really nice to get out of here soon, my legs are kind of getting cramped. It would be even nicer to meet a smart, pretty lady who stays in shape and shares a couple of interests with me. It'd be awesome if she was into Doctor Who or Zombie Movies, but it's not a requirement. I'm a former smoker, so it'd be great if she didn't smoke (anymore). I promise not to discriminate against those into Sports or Reality Television (I don't follow either) as long as you do the same for me. :) I'd really like to develop a social network in town, so if you would prefer to start as friends, I'm ok with that. As long as I get out of this trunk...

[ilovetraif]

Online Dating Tally

5     Most amount of dates I've gone on with the same guy

5     Guys I met online who work at the same place I do

       (I never see them. Thank god for small mercies.)

2     Gropers

1     Guy told me he doesn't pay for anything on the first date

1     Asked if I was "going to get that"

1     Cursed out (by a groper when I ran way from him)

1     Date with a guy who didn't believe in deodorant

1     Offer to be friends with benefits only

1     Commented on how I finished all the food on my plate

1     Commented on my outfit ("so...snow shoes." It was after a blizzard))

1     Went on a date with two different guys and it turned out they were friends

1     Laughed at by total strangers

1     Bartender offered me a free drink

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1 yr on Match.com

6 mo on Jdate

8 mo on OkCupid

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I'm going to an all you can eat buffet after work.