I Should Live In Salt
Summary: You're ruthless, Lucretia.
But she had to be, to make it this far. And now Maureen and Lucas are dead, and she has lost her family again. Notes: Maureen Miller/Lucretia; character death; mostly canon-compliant give or take a few things; post Crystal Kingdom; spoilers up to current (ep. 65); Dead Wives’ Club
She cups the Stone in her fingers, turning it over and over and over, gemstones falling from her fingers like tears.
They fall and smash against the floor like glass. It is small, and it’s power residual, and this innocuous rock was responsible for the loss of the last thing she had left.
She kicks the table the relics lay on, shouting in pain and frustration. She clenches her fist around the Stone and slams her knuckles against the hard wooden surface.
She hears the pop of her knuckles and feels her skin split and it’s not enough, not yet. She does it again. Not yet.
Again. Again, and this time, she feels the break in her fingers, and she feels the Stone cut into her palm and she lets her knees buckle from the pain, banging her elbows against the table.
She gasps, then finally, finally sobs. She hadn’t cried yet, and it had been eating her away inside. For months she had yet to cry and it gnawed on her, dark and insidious and aching.
How could she not have cried? How could she not have been able to cry until she physically damaged herself? How had she managed to be so cruel?
She knows Maureen never wanted a world where Lucas was dead. She probably didn’t want to die the way she had, either. Or lost control of herself and hurt Lucas. Or any of the horrible things that had been relayed to her in real time and from Taako, Merle, and Magnus.
And she never wanted a future where they were both gone from her, not simply estranged, but gone, beyond her reach.
Read on AO3